Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things twilight…

here's the Edward POV I promised some peeps! enjoy….
sorry this has taken SO long…I have a REALLY hectic week at school…so I REALLY should be studying and NOT updating…but I love this story too much!!

new update might not be for a whilebecause as I said, I have a hectic week at school…then I'm going to MELBOURNE!!! FOR THE WEEKEND!!! SO EXCITED!!!!!!!! lols… update as soon as I get back!!! or even before…but yeh

xoxo enjoy the chapter!

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

EDWARD'S POV

I am pathetic. I'm such a loser. Why couldn't I just…? I'm so stupid. What am I doing? Why did she…?

I. Am. Pathetic.

Here I am, wallowing in my room. And where is that going to get me? I'm sure I was not imagining the glow around Bella today. The happiness she was feeling. And it was no coincidence this was happening after her date with him.

I couldn't bring myself to say the name. The guy who stole my Bella. The guy who took her from me.

Now this is bad. I'm blaming this guy and I don't even know him! He could be a genuinely really nice guy, just as Bella said. Or was Bella blinded by her admiration of him, her like for him, possibly even….her love.

I don't want to think that, I can't think that. But I'm still thinking it!

What is going on? Why…why does it have to be so…?

Is God punishing me? Is this his way of telling me that it was a mistake to play around. Because now the one girl I'd always loved could be leaving me?

Woah. Ok, where did that come from? Ok, it's true I'd always loved Bella. But as a best friend, a sister even. Just. It's hard, the thought of losing her. Now. When I need her most.

Well, when I feel like I need her most. It's probably because I think she's leaving that I feel I need her more than ever. Now, I'm just incoherent.

I was cold Real cold. She'd made me breakfast. I knew it was a guilt act and I don't need the pity. But she was trying. I should've tried. Instead, I was cold. I'm not going to be cold.

I shouldn't be cold. I have no reason, no audacity to be cold. And so I will be warm. Warm and fuzzy. Bright and shiny. Whatever it is people say.

I should pretend like nothing happened. Or rather, just see it as life moving on.

Bella's life is moving on. She's got the job, the look, the style, the friends, the….man. Her life is going somewhere. She has a big future ahead of her and she's on the fast lane to get there.

And so, my life will progress as well. I'm not going to wallow. I'm not going to sit here on my ass, contemplating what I should or shouldn't have done to keep Bella by my side.

I'm going to get out there, live my life. Strive to my own future. Because life is supposed to go on and right now I'm wallowing, possibly even driving Bella away from me from my wallowing. So no more sullen Cullen.

I'm coming back, better than ever. I can move on, I'm not going to be tied down just because Bella's with another…man. I'm Edward Cullen. That's just not me.

and maybe it'll help me win Bella back…

BELLA'S POV

The doorbell rang and I rushed to get it.

"Hello carita!" Nessa said. She looked stunning in a cute, silver mini dress, hippie head band and killer heels. I felt outshined in my tartan tutu dress and high top Doc Martens.

"You look amazing Ness!"

"And you sure do brush up well Swan. Glad to see the glasses are back! Come on! Let's get going! Ready to party!" She started dancing on the door mat by herself and I laughed.

"Ok, just a sec. Gotta wait for Edward!"

It was around midday when Edward had finally emerged from his room. I don't know what he did in there but when he did come out, he seemed happier, freer, like a burden had been lifted off his shoulders. It was like his weird behaviour from the last few weeks didn't even happen and he was back to his old self again, asking me, of course, to drive him home after his night out. I told him I was going out with Nessa and might as well tag along with him so I could pick him up afterwards.

He was fine with that but we didn't really talk for the rest of the day. It was good he wasn't doing the whole hostile conversation thing anymore but there was still an air of unease around us. Like something hadn't quite been cleared up.

But, at this point in time, it seemed like the best I would get, so I wasn't complaining!

Edward came out wearing DKNY jeans, a grey shirt that subtly showed off his toned body and a pea coat.

"Sorry to keep you waiting girls. You both look amazing!"

I blushed at the compliment but Nessa took it in her stride.

"Of course we do! I can't believe you even had to say that! It should be a given!"

"Just thought I'd reiterate. As a gentleman, that's what I do!"

"Fine, fine. You win this time. But I'll be getting you back Mr Cullen."

"Looking forward to it Vanny."

They continued their flirtatious banter down to the car and I followed along, laughing.
I hadn't been out like this for a while so it was nice to get back out there. Additionally, I had Nessa to keep me company so I wasn't spending my night alone, trying to avoid the evil stares from Edward's friends.

I drove to the club in silence. Edward and Nessa continued to talk, catching up on things they'd missed since they last saw each other. Edward's chivalrous charm was back and Nessa obviously fell for it. Her eyes fluttered and she was so animated, more so than usual and that's saying something big. I chuckled to myself at this. Even someone as strong and individual as Nessa could fall for Edward. It was truly a talent.

I found a spot for my car not far from the club and walked with Edward and Nessa. I felt like a third wheel but I was fine to be left with my thoughts. Nessa grabbed hold of Edward's arm as they walked past and I could tell she was enjoying the envious looks girls at the club gave her as they walked past. I walked by, in the shadow of their spotlight, unnoticed by the many pairs of staring eyes.

"Will you be joining me on the dance floor Edward?" Nessa said, suggestively. I usually got quite annoyed at girls who were so forward and obvious but it being Nessa, well it was kind of expected and I had gotten used to it.

I rolled my eyes and started walking away.

"I'll be at the bar if you ever need to find me." I said and left Edward and Nessa to their own fun. Silly me thought that Nessa would be wanting to spend the night with me. Of course, here I was, alone again at the bar, drinking away my loneliness.

Not that I really minded, especially today, with the thought of Jacob. Knowing that there was someone who wanted me, it gave me some sort of inner confidence.

The night went on. I actually got up and danced at one point, my insanity getting the better of me, and luckily was coordinated enough to not hurt myself or anyone else in the process. A few guys offered to buy me a drink but I declined, not only because of Jacob but because if I let them, I would be in no fit state to drive anyone home.

Ok, I have to admit that I was checking my phone throughout the night. I don't know what dating etiquette is but Jacob hadn't called or texted since last night and I was worried that he didn't enjoy it or something like that. Oh, listen to me! I sound like one of those girls, Edward picks up on a regular basis. Caring about when and why a guy calls or deciphering every word he speaks, every move he makes. Pathetic, I decided after the hundredth time checking my phone.

I was about to order another drink, to distract my mind from such stupid thoughts when an exhausted Nessa flopped down on the stool next to me.

"Oh, I am plastered! A beer, please!" she shouted to the bartender.

"Having fun?" I shouted over the music.

"Oh, you know it babe!" she replied, taking a swig at her beer.

"Why didn't you come out with me and Edward?" Nessa shouted.

"I thought you might want some privacy."

"Oh." I looked around the room until I finally spotted Edward on the private couches with his mates. Two blonde girls were draped across him on either side. Hence Nessa's presence here.

"I feel bad Bella. This was supposed to be us catching up, having a night out town! And you're having no fun at all!"

"Oh, Nessa. You know better than to worry about me. Trust me, I'm having fun! I'm not as….out there as you and Edward are but I'm still having fun tonight?"

"Are you sure, Bella?" she said, like a concerned mother.

"Yes, Nessa. I'm sure!" I said, exasperatedly.

"Ok, good. But…" she said, trying to fake innocence. I knew better.

"What, Nessa? What are you planning? You've got that evil look on your face. I know you're up to something! Tell me!"

"I'm sure you're having fun and all. But it's time to have some real fun. Nessa style!" and without warning she pulled me up to the middle of the dance floor and started dancing to the music. I stood there rather stunned and a little annoyed at her but after her persistent encouragement, I joined in, moving to the music, a little bit cautious so I didn't hurt anyone.

Nessa and I sung to the lyrics of the songs at the top of our lungs, jumped up and down to the beats and laughed as guys tried to hit on us. We danced all through the night, only taking a break once to catch our breaths and take a drink before hitting the dance floor again.

This was exactly what I needed. A little bit of reckless fun, just as Nessa always delivered. At the end of the night, I parted ways with her as she climbed into a cab to take her to her temporary accommodation. I watched her cab drive away and turned towards my car. Edward was already waiting, with one of the blonde girls he was…canoodling with before on the couches. Without so much as a look, they climbed into the car and I drove us all home.

Edward and the chick went in first….to do whatever and I followed soon afterwards. I was so tired from all that dancing and planned to go straight to sleep after my shower. On my way to my room, I checked my phone. One New Message. Must have got it while I was dancing.

Missed you today. See you soon I hope.
Going to be so weird not being able to see you every day now.
Maybe I should try and find a case where we can work together again.
But I hope work won't be the only way I get to see you again.
Call me if you want to see me anytime soon. Work, play…whatever.
I don't mind. Just want to see you.
Jacob.

I smiled. He was way too sweet and I was glad I'd gotten to know him. It was way too late to be sending a message back so I left the phone on my bedside table and went to have a shower.