Author's Note: Sorry for not replying to the reviews from last chapter. Real life got in the way again. :/ Sorry!

Chapter Fourteen: Slow Burn

"Not really sure how to feel about it... Something in the way you move makes me feel like I can't live without you." Stay by Rihanna

RED FLOODED HIS vision; the strange color personified both his rage and the blood that had been shed on his account. His chest ached but whether it was from loss or literal physical pain Kakashi wasn't sure. In his mind he knew that he was seeing red because of the light shining through his closed eyelids but another part of his mind wanted desperately for it to be the fires of Hell. It was his fault his mother was dead…

A gentle hand prodding his shoulder jarred him from his self-deprecating reverie and he begrudgingly opened his eyes. Without moving his head he rolled his eyes to the right, immediately realizing it was Sakumo. Tears welled up in his eyes. How did he explain? How did he apologize for what he'd caused? He hadn't even been the one to kill the attacker… Kakashi could feel his disdain for Orochimaru growing by the second.

"I'm so sorry," Kakashi whispered, his voice hoarse with passion and disuse. "I tried. I really did. There were just too many and I—"

"It's okay. You're alive, that's all that matters. The rest will work out," soothed Sakumo, his eyes heavy with emotion. He smiled slightly and ran a hand over Kakashi's ragtag mop of hair. "Your mother is proud of you."

Kakashi tried to quash the feeling of hope that trembled within his gut. "She… She's dead isn't she?"

Sakumo froze, leaning back in confusion. "No one told you? She's in critical condition, but she's stable. If Orochimaru hadn't shown up when he had…"

Orochimaru. Orochimaru had saved her. Any and all feelings of discontent for the snake Sennin evaporated and Kakashi stared down at his hands. He was a wreck, both physically and emotionally. "I thought she was dead… I wished it was me. I know I'm supposed to carry on and help Konoha but…."

Kakashi smiled and wiped the tears from his unmasked face. "I think I would have been able to smile at the memory of her at some point. I just pray that I'll get more time with her."

"That's actually why I'm here." Sakumo reached over and pulled up Kakashi's mask, knowing that Kakashi felt a bit too vulnerable at the moment. "You are scheduled for a retrieval mission."

Kakashi stared at the sheets, noticing a slight spattering of red where his blood had seeped through his bandages. Was he even in good enough condition to go?

"I… What if Kaa-san wakes up when I'm—"

"No. She won't. That's why you are going. You are accompanying Jiraiya, Orochimaru, and Inoichi to fetch Tsunade. Yawaraka… she's critical. Stable but critical. If we don't get her help soon… she might experience a decline. We don't know if she'd come back from it. In a state of suspension she has two months but the wounds made by Banshi were too significant. He severed many arteries. Your mother is the best medical ninja in the village so we're short on someone who would have the potential to help her."

Kakashi narrowed his eyes, realizing the pinched tone of his father's voice and the sharp angles at the corners of his eyes could only mean one thing. "You're not going?"

"Aa… In the event that your mother does get worse they agreed to wake her up so that I could…" Say goodbye. It didn't need to be said and it wasn't said because it was too painful. Kakashi nodded in understanding, repressing the dastardly feeling of choking to death that usually accompanied tears of loss.

"I won't let you down, papa. I promise." Kakashi forced himself to hug his father even though it literally hurt to do so. When he began to cry his father mistook them as tears of emotional pain and allowed himself to cry as well. Kakashi figured it was for the best and didn't allow himself to pull back from the hug.

His father eventually pulled back and patted him on the head. It was an affectionate gesture that Kakashi had grown to appreciate. "Jiraiya would have informed you but he's busy gathering information and preparing for the trip while Orochimaru dotes over Anko. He was quite livid with her for doing something so stupid. I'll send him in to speak with you because I know you have some things to say."

Kakashi nodded, looking away as he thought over the events of the past few moments. It was as though one weight had been lifted from his shoulders only to be replaced by another one of greater importance.

[.-_-.]

OROCHIMARU STOOD IN front of him, hands tucked awkwardly behind his back as he regarded Kakashi with nervous eyes. Kakashi couldn't bring himself to speak yet and Orochimaru refused so they simply shared the silence for a while longer.

Kakashi glanced down at his lap again, the red blotches on his blanket reminding him of the battles he'd been through only hours ago. Uzu had been saved but not without the loss of lives. Thanks to Inoichi, Shikaku, and Choza the loss hadn't been too great but there was death nonetheless.

Despite plucking up the gumption to open his mouth, Kakashi found that the words just didn't want to come out. He closed his mouth, passing his tongue against his lower lip before reconsidering and opening up again. "I'm sorry we didn't take better care of Anko."

"It's quite alright. From what I hear she acted completely irrationally. Shikaku and Choza are returning to Konoha with her in tow. I can't afford to bring her with us to fetch Tsunade," explained Orochimaru, his eyes narrowed as his mind recounted detail after detail. "How exactly did she get… hurt?"

"She… well she acted like an idiot, really. She tried to attack a Jonin. Jumped on his back and then hesitated before slitting his throat. She did manage to get on his back though, so you do have to give her that."

"I'm training her to be the perfect little assassin; she'd better be able to jump onto their back before they can stop her." Orochimaru's voice was soft, almost scared. He was deflecting and they both knew it.

"So… I hear Kaa-san is in a bad way, but I think we both know she'd be dead if you hadn't shown up when you did."

Orochimaru wandered a little closer, moving from just inside the door where he had been standing and over to Kakashi's bedside table where there was a picture of Kakashi and Yawaraka, sweaty from training and bearing gigantic smiles. It was inexcusably corny but undeniable cute.

"I only bothered to save her after I was sure that Anko was safe." Orochimaru picked the photo up, bringing it close to his face with a scrutinizing squint narrowing his purple eyes. He set it back down with a blasé motion and turned to face Kakashi, a serious expression on his prominent features. "You're lucky she was safe otherwise I wouldn't have done it."

Kakashi didn't allow his eyes to narrow in irritation. If he was going to convince Orochimaru to stay he'd need to cater to the man's ego. "I'll always keep Anko safe. But…. Maybe you're right; maybe you're not. The fact of the matter is that you did… and I'm grateful."

Kakashi forced himself to scoot over to the edge of the bed where Orochimaru was standing, arms folded across his chest. It was a deeply emotional and highly physical battle—he didn't particularly want to do what he was about to do and it physically hurt him to do it. And yet, here he was, seconds away from hugging the legendary Snake Sennin.

Orochimaru's entire body tensed up when Kakashi's arms suddenly latched around his waist and the boy's face was pressed against his side. He lifted his arms up as though he'd done something wrong and looked down at Kakashi with confusion and panic in his eyes.

"Thank you."

The awkward hug lasted a few more seconds before Kakashi pulled back, his shoulders popping with the motion.

Orochimaru looked anywhere but him, his shoulders hunched up in an obviously uncomfortable posture. "Uh… Yeah. Sure…"

Orochimaru scratched at his neck, coughed and then turned around to high-tail it out of there. He paused in the doorway and glanced back at Kakashi, his cheeks red with embarrassment. Kakashi couldn't help but smile lightly at the dazed expression on the man's face. "We leave at eight tomorrow. Be ready."

When the raven haired snake summoner was gone, Kakashi repressed the urge to chuckle. At least now he knew how to effectively stump the man if they ever became enemies. He'd heard once that a surprise show of affection in the midst of a fight could surprise even the most level-headed ninja. The thought of Orochimaru shrinking away from an overly enthusiastic Sasuke sent him into a fit of laughter so loud that his father had to check on him. As far as he was concerned, it was worth it.

[.-_-.]

"WE'RE GOING THROUGH Shukuiuba-machi first and then if we don't find clues we're heading to Otafuku Gai because that's one of the reliable places to find Tsunade," announced Jiraiya, his voice echoing throughout the room do a case of inflated self-importance. Orochimaru huffed and rolled his eyes, but otherwise didn't mention his friends' superior knowledge of Tsunade's whereabouts.

Kakashi nodded solemnly, inwardly wondering how the hell they would manage to retrieve her when Naruto had been the only one successful enough to convince her. 'You can always try to let me take over your body,' suggested Naruto, remembering how the Kyuubi-enhanced Kakashi had done just that.

'Not over my dead body,' retorted Kakashi. He could only imagine the kind of antics Naruto would pull if he was in control of their shared body. 'You'd make a direct trip to the nearest ramen stand and then where would my figure be?'

Naruto scoffed and folded his incorporeal arms and Kakashi withdrew from his mindscape to rejoin the present situation. Orochimaru was checking and double-checking all of his supply pouches. Inoichi was still cramming things into his. Jiraiya was feverishly scribbling on a pad of paper, recording his perverted ideas and possible one-liners to unleash on Tsunade when they found her. Kakashi… sat. He had been ready since last night. He tried to always be ready for a surprise mission. He hadn't been ready for the invasion and that had been slap in the face.

It didn't take long for them to leave. Sakumo didn't come to say goodbye; Kakashi found it a little strange that his father didn't even show up but he didn't mention it or outwardly acknowledge it. He found himself surprisingly solemn and more like the old him than he'd been in a long time. It was amazing what a close call could do to one's behavior. .

As they traveled through the day, Kakashi found his mind wandering back and forth between his mother and father. A niggling shred of doubt began to grow in the pit of stomach, cold hard feeling sending ways of nausea throughout him. What if his father hadn't come because he was angry with Kakashi? What if he was being held responsible for her state?

Kakashi shook the feelings from his mind as best as he could, knowing that there were already too many things he felt guilty about. He still felt guilt about the situation with his mother but that situation was not one that he could change, so why bother feeling like shit about it?

"You alright there, kiddo? You look a little pale…." Inoichi commented, his face rigid with fear. He was assuming the worst; he'd seen the kind of memories Kakashi had to contend with. He'd had nightmares after experiencing them secondhand, let alone from an emotionally connected point of view.

Kakashi nodded, winking at the older boy. "Just wondering whether or not taking up knitting would be a good decision…. I hear it's quite relaxing."

"Er… okay. Sorry I asked."

Kakashi smirked beneath his mask and then pushed a little harder so that he was even with Jiraiya.

"How much further until we reach Shukuba?"

"Another six hours. We'll go a bit faster after we stop for lunch. You gonna be able to keep up?" Jiraiya smirked widely, knowing that Kakashi wouldn't have a problem. He would, however, be rather offended by Jiraiya's offhand jibe.

"Maa, I think I might like to take a nap when we stop, but other than that…"

"Jokes aside, how are you feeling?" asked Jiraiya, his wooden getas clopping loudly against each branch he jumped over. Kakashi shrugged.

"Pretty shitty, actually…. But I've got a duty to perform, so…." Kakashi sheepishly ran a hand through his hair, sighing when it fell flat again. Jiraiya reached over when they were in the air and ruffled it for him so that it would stand up again.

Kakashi smiled at him, using his eyes so that it would be conveyed more easily. If one paid very careful attention to the shadows cast upon his mask they could tell when he was smiling. The less observant were forced to read his eyes.

After another hour they stopped and ate lunch. True to his word, Kakashi wolfed down his meal and then laid down so the startling sense of vertigo would fade. When lunch was over they eradicated any proof of them having been there. Then they took off at a quicker pace than they'd been traveling before. Kakashi could already feel the burn in his abused muscles.

Breathing heavily still hurt so he was forced to keep calm, breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth. He'd long grown accustomed to the warm feeling of his breath against the mask but today it made him feel rather sticky.

There were a few times, as they ran, that his muscles seized up and he nearly fell out of the trees because he landed so bizarrely. Each time someone would grab him and prevent him from falling. To his surprise, Orochimaru caught him the majority of the times. He was almost certain it was due to his offhand statement about always keeping Anko safe that the snake man was even bothering to acknowledge his existence, let alone help him.

Orochimaru was not a perfect man, even before his defection. He was incredibly rude at times, though his speech was much more cordial and… polished than Jiraiya's. He could be effectively cold and distanced from you without even opening his mouth and he could cut you down in less than ten seconds. However, he did have the capacity to be a warm, caring person. He just didn't have very many people that he cared about. Anko happened to be one of them and if Kakashi was willing to protect her as well then Kakashi was worth keeping around to protect one of his few useful people. Kakashi was partly praying that whatever human decency still remained inside Orochimaru was also wanting to help Kakashi avoid being orphaned.

As they neared their destination, Kakashi could help but hope that there would be nice beds in the so-called "Inn-Town." His mind began to wander excitedly over various futon set-ups and mattress combos that he had found most comfortable over the years.

It was around dinnertime when they arrived, which meant work first and food later. Tsunade would most likely be eating or gambling at this time, so finding her now was crucial.

"Good thing we didn't bring Choza," snickered Inoichi, "Or he'd be bitching the whole time about not getting to eat."

"It's a shame we brought you, though, you'll be looking into every mirror we pass instead of for the target," Kakashi jibed, laughing to show that he was only playing. Inoichi rolled his eyes and flicked Kakashi in the back of the head. Kakashi glared at him and was ready to make another lazily-spoken, biting comment before Jiraiya shot him a glare.

"Focus."

That was enough to get them back on track and remind Kakashi of his ailing mother. How could he forget? He was just trying to enjoy the lightened mood that Inoichi had created but now was not the time. Jiraiya would learn how Kakashi worked in due time.

Kakashi and Inoichi were sent off to 'play' in a nearby playground while Orochimaru and Jiraiya sauntered into a nearby, shady-looking bar so that they could determine whether or not Tsunade had been there. It would look quite suspicious to see a young child and a teenager in a bar, even though they were shinobi. They didn't want others to know that they were shinobi, so playing it was.

Inoichi opted to lazily float through the air on the swings but Kakashi needed to look more childish, seeing as he was in the body of a nine year old. Lazily he plopped down in the sandbox, tracing boring patterns through the dirt.

"I'm Amai… Wanna play?" whispered a shy voice. Kakashi looked up, unsurprised to see that the girlish voice matched a cute little girl. Cute in the sense that she was wearing the most adorable outfit Kakashi had seen in a long time. She had on a skirt, day sandals, a frilly pink top, and ribbons in her hair.

He smiled and nodded, wondering if it was obvious that he was a ninja simply because of his mask and ninjato. He shrugged to himself, figuring that most people were stupid and couldn't make the connection.

"What's your name?" she asked, gently kicking her red and pink polka-dotted ball towards him.

"Er…" Kakashi looked at her dress, away from her rosy cheeks, and looked around until his eyes fell upon Inoichi who was giving him a peculiar look as he watched them like a hawk. He was keeping a sharp lookout, wasn't he? Perfect! "Gentan!"

Amai smiled and suddenly her smile grew cruel. "Wanna play dodgeball?"

"Sure."

She smiled, hefted the ball up in her hands, wound an arm back, and flung it at him as hard as he could. He allowed the ball to hit him directly in the face. He found himself mildly surprised by the amount of strength she'd put behind the throw.

With a sigh he squatted down, grabbing for the ball as he realized he was liking this girl less and less. Kakashi stood up again, ball in hand, trying to carefully gauge the amount of strength that would be appropriate for a nine year old. He miscalculated and she was sent flying across the sandbox.

"What the-! How did you do that? I'm the best dodgeball kid I know!" she screeched in disbelief. She was covered in sand and her obvious displeasure was coming off of her in waves. Kakashi felt vaguely appreciative that she was not a ninja because she had a definite mean streak.

"Erm… gomen."

"Gomen!? I'll show you sorry!" she screeched again, grabbing up the ball and flinging it at him. Her anger affected her throw and it missed by a mile, but that didn't stop her from turning on Kakashi, chest heaving with anger. "Now look what you did! I can't find my ball! You'll pay for that Gentan!"

"Maa, maa, let's not get over-excited, ne?"

"I'll show you over-excited!"

Kakashi immediately turned and ran over to Inoichi who was silently shaking with laughter. "Nii-san! Nii-san! I think we need to leave!"

"I guess I need to teach you to make friends, Kakashi-nii." Inoichi teased Kakashi as they both began to flee. Kakashi gave him a dark, withering look and Inoichi immediately shut up. It was hard to remember that it was a grown man inside that tiny little body sometimes.

[.-_-.]

"HAVE YOU SEEN a beautiful blonde about—" Jiraiya held his hand up as indicator of Tsunade's height. "this tall, and with a figure like this—" he swept his hands outward, inward for her waist, and then back outward to emphasize the hips of her hourglass figure. "in here recently?"

"Like this?" The bartender mimicked the motion, over-emphasizing the breast portion of the hourglass. Jiraiya nodded greedily and Orochimaru rolled his eyes, looking away with a put-off expression.

"Yeah, like this!" Jiraiya air-pantomimed her body again and Orochimaru scoffed in annoyance, reaching over to grab his hands.

"What this moron means to say is that we're looking for a woman that looks mildly like that and has a gambling problem. She might have a very small girl with her about, maybe, seven?" said Orochimaru, his voice pleading. It was a strange tone to hear in his voice, if one were used to hearing it full of malice.

The bartender nodded and smiled. "She owes me about fifteen thousand ryu for her tab, though…. I'd be willing to help you out if I knew that she didn't have this awful debt to repay me." '

Orochimaru deadpanned at the man, his face utterly devoid of any happy emotion. "Fifteen thousand ryu?" (About fifteen hundred US dollars)

"'fraid so, sir."

"Lord above, how that woman spends so much on Sake…" grumbled Orochimaru, digging out his wallet. Surprisingly enough it was a lot like Naruto's frog wallet save for the fact that his was a snake. Jiraiya snickered just looking at it until Orochimaru gave him a dark glare.

"There. We paid, now tell us what we need to know," said Jiraiya, leaning on the counter.

"I paid! Not you!" protested Orochimaru, holding his head in his hands.

"Well one of us did, what's it matter?"

Orochimaru glared at Jiraiya for a moment. "I'm out fifteen thousand ryu, that's what it matters!"

"Look, I have customers okay? She went to Tanzaku-Gai, as far as I heard her telling the little girl."

Orochimaru and Jiraiya looked at each other with a grin before bowing and leaving as quickly as possible. When they finally emerged into the sunlight again, both had to blink in shock because the bar had been so dark.

When Orochimaru and Jiraiya noticed that Kakashi and Inoichi were gone they both scowled in frustration.

"You tell them to do one simple thing and they can't even manage that," scowled Jiraiya.

Orochimaru shrugged, sighing heavily. "Eh. They're kids. It's what they do."

Jiraiya froze, staring at his friend. "Oh, don't tell me I'm getting child-rearing advice from the snake Sennin!"

Orochimaru narrowed his eyes in amusement. "I put up with you don't I?"

[.-_-.]

"WE COULDN'T HAVE stayed and gotten a hotel for the night, or even stopped for dinner. No. Because that would've just been too much," grouched Inoichi, yanking extra hard on his hair as he readjusted it.

"Look, I offered to get you some extra ration bars—"

"Jiraiya, that's not food!"

Orochimaru and Kakashi exchanged pained glances and continued to run on in silence. They were only a few miles out of Tanzaku-Gai and Inoichi was still bitching about how hungry he was.

"Tell ya what, kid, how about after we get there and find her I buy you a nice, hot meal. Deal?" suggested Jiraiya, his wooden getas clopping loudly against the tree branch.

"Cha!" Inoichi pumped his fist into the air and fell back so he could talk to Jiraiya. "Told you I'd get that tight-wad to buy me a me—"

"I heard that!" snapped Jiraiya. "Now you get nothing."

"But—"

"Shut up!" snapped Orochimaru, clutching at his ears. "I have listened to the two of you for the past forty miles but no more! Now just shut up and let's enjoy the last few miles in silence."

He paused for a moment and then muttered under his breath, "Anyone who so much as opens their mouth to even think of speaking is getting the beating of a lifetime."

Even Jiraiya remained quiet after that. They traveled on for the next twenty minutes in stark silence until they reached the border of Tanzaku-Gai. They immediately went bar to bar, hoping to find Tsunade, only to find out that she'd just left.

After visiting the sixth bar, they were feeling rather low on their luck. However, Jiraiya was not to be deterred and he immediately went to the next one on his list, dragging them all with him. He marched in, demanded to know if she'd been there and was pointed to the back corner. Orochimaru went outside to retrieve both Inoichi and Kakashi and inside they went.

When they met her, they were quite surprised to see that she didn't appear drunk at all. "What do you two want?" she snarled, popping a rice ball into her mouth. She glowered at them as she chewed thoughtfully.

Jiraiya paused for a moment before glancing at Shizune who stared up at him with puppy dog eyes. "The kinds of things I want can't be said before such youthful ears."

Tsunade reddened angrily and bashed him on the head. "Baka! And you. What the hell do you think you're doing here?" Kakashi hadn't thought it would be possible, but Orochimaru blanched at the taunt. Was he scared of her?

"I'm sorry, Tsunade-hime… I just—"

"What you wanna ruin my life again?" she snapped, grabbing the bottle of Sake and taking a swig of it. Orochimaru's shoulders slumped forward and he looked away, ashamed.

"You know how I feel about that," he said quietly. Tsunade took one look at him and slumped over herself, feeling apologetic.

She took another swig of the rice wine and then put her head in her hands. "I'm trying so hard to erase all my memories of home but you two just don't ever let me."

Orochimaru sank down on the bench next to her, a tortured expression on his face. "Tsunade, if I could I'd do it all different. You're not the only one who lost people to that war… I lost my parents, and I lost my team. You… Don't make us lose you, too."

Kakashi stood up a little straighter as a most bizarre thought occurred to him. Orochimaru was in love with Tsunade. Had it always been this way?

Tsunade shook her head morosely and didn't look at him. "No, you're better off without me."

Orochimaru wrapped his arm around her in a friendly way, but Kakashi could see that Orochimaru practically itched for it to mean more. How did no one else notice? "Tsunade, we've come to find you because we're in dire need of your help."

"Please," spoke Kakashi, realizing that this was his unspoken cue to speak. "My mother… she's a very important figure in Uzu and they need her to survive. If she dies… Uzu might never recover."

Tsuande looked away as she considered. Jiraiya's getas made an awkwardly loud sound as he shifted his weight, having fallen silent do to the tense situation. Inoichi was sitting down next to Shizune, playing with her food—much to her delight.

"Pay off my debts for me and I'll help you," bargained Tsunade, taking another swig of the Sake on the table.

Orochimaru blanched and immediately turned to Jiraiya. "Whatever it is we're splitting it fifty-fifty."

Jiraiya groaned, but submitted. "How much do you owe?"

"Just here or over all?" she asked innocently.

"I owe ten thousand ryu here, and then fifteen thousand over in Shukuba… But that's it."

"That it?" screeched Jiraiya, his face as white as his hair. "That's it? That's a small fortune!"

Orochimaru covered his face in his hands. "I paid more than half…."

"You already paid the debts in Shukuba?" Tsunade looked surprised. But then she nodded.

"Great…. So I'll pay here and then we'll go!" Jiraiya was happy that he'd ended up with the better end of the agreement.

"Fine. But then we go our separate ways."

"You know, I can talk to sensei about getting you your own division in Konoha. I've been thinking and I think the medical ninja on all teams is a great idea," reasoned Orochimaru, even though he knew he was pulling at straws. "Just…. Give things a shot, okay?"

"Try me after I heal… what's her name?"

"Sazanami Yawaraka," supplied Kakashi.

"Yeah. After that."

It was quiet for a moment before Inoichi leaned in towards Jiraiya and smiled lecherously. "Now about that meal, eh?"

Kakashi sank down next to Inoichi, feeling drained. Now there was hope.

Author's Note: This chapter was so hard to write. I'm sorry it's late. I had a lot of things going on in my life after updating this. Got a boyfriend, tennis season started up again, and I've been dead tired trying to get my life in order and survive at the same time.

Review and let me know what you think. Reviews fuel my creativity. Did you enjoy banter between Orochimaru and Jiraiya? Ja ne! [: