Change of Heart
Chapter 28
I know now that my lateness coming home has upset my roommate because as soon as I finish climbing into the window she is on me like white on rice, her voice is a mixture between worried and really pissed off. "Where in the world have you been?"
"In jail, I just finished making my escape from the joint and headed here first" I quip, but when I see the horror on face I immediately feel ashamed for making my best friend upset.
"Samantha Gene Brady," she begins on what I am sure to be one of her lectures about how easily it is to ruin my reputation when I hold up a hand to stop her from launching off into a full diatribe over the evils of frat boys, alcohol, unprotected sex and how I don't want my life to be like an episode of the Jersey Shore.
On that note though no way would I ever get a spray tan that makes my palest skin look like a can of Tropicana orange juice and two if my life was compared to a TV show Awkward would be more my speed since god knows all I do is bumble around and generally make myself look like an imbecile in front of Professor Wells aka the campus hottie who has agreed to take my virginity from me.
Thinking about EJ and the agreement we finally decided upon which will one day actually devirginize me I'm lost in thought of exactly what my lessons in sex will actually entail that I'm not even listening to Jamie who just pushed my hand down away from her face and I think is currently saying how the gossip of tonight's police raid of Luna's has already hit the den of the dorms.
This finally gets me to focus on my best friend instead of fantasizing about what EJ may or may not do to me on my first lesson of how to lose your virginity in the advanced college version of having your hot professor seduce you where your panties will probably have a flame rating on them by the time he is finished with you. Although for me to even begin those illicit lessons of amour sometime in the near future he told me I have to be in his class in the morning if he had to be there.
"Jamie, I have to get into the bed, I've got English Lit class in the morning at eight and I can't be late for class."
The stunned look on my roommate's face is almost comical and she stops midsentence about underage drinking being one of the reasons our generation is so messed up about their priorities.
"Did you get abducted by aliens instead of going out partying with Lucas and his dumb frat brothers tonight?" Jamie asks with a straight face because I can tell she sure as hell doesn't believe that I'm worried about missing class much less being late to a class.
I shake my head cautiously and give her a smile, "No, I went with Lucas and we did party with some of the guys, but I can assure you no alien abduction happened during our bouts of drinking and dancing."
Jamie placed her hands on her hips, "So Lucas was a gentleman and brought you back home instead of whisking you away to the frat house and taking advantage of you in your slightly inebriated state?"
"Lucas a gentleman? Come on Jamie you know better than to think he would ever come to my rescue, he's my drinking buddy who is secretly in love with my ho of a sister Carrie."
Then I instantly feel bad for saying Lucas is in love with Carrie, secretly or not because I know Jamie has always liked Lucas even if she gets tongue tied around him and starts blushing all different shades of pink whenever he is around.
"I don't really think he is in love with her, but you know what I mean," I began to explain which really isn't helping because Jamie knows the score, unless she decides to step up and finally tell Lucas how she feels about him all she will ever do is be on the sidelines hoping one day he will notice her as more than just my sweet best friend.
"It doesn't matter what I think about Lucas," Jamie shook her head and for the thousandth time I want to will her some confidence with guys, not like I'm an expert with them, but compared to me Jamie is verging on joining the convent before she would get the nerve up to tell a guy how she felt about him. "What does matter is what happened tonight and how did you get back home if Lucas didn't bring you back home?"
I don't say anything for a few seconds debating on whether or not to tell Jamie the truth that I was with EJ, but I haven't ever lied to her because she has been my confidant for years. I mean this girl has been privy to all my I'm going to get Austin Reed to fall in love with me and dump my sister Carrie schemes even though each and every one of those hair brained ideas crashed and burned in the end.
"EJ brought me back to the dorm tonight," is the condensed version of what happened although I doubt Jamie will want to hear the condensed version since she has been up all night worrying that something bad happened to me while I was out partying and she was being the good girl studying for her classes.
"EJ, as in the tall, dark and handsome Professor Wells that most of the people on campus are lusting after him, EJ?"
"Do you know anyone else named EJ?" I counter back to her.
"You're on a first name basis with the hottest professor that has ever graced Salem University?"
I nod my head. "Yes, he told me to call him EJ after we kissed."
"Are you drunk and delusional because you just said you kissed Professor Wells?"
It all comes out in a rush of words from me, "Not, drunk anymore, and believe me I never thought I would kiss him either, but when Luna's was raided I lip locked with him so that I could escape before Daddy realized I was at the bar. Then I was mortified and he kissed me again and he was going to bring me back to the dorm, but I fell asleep which he didn't want to embarrass me so he took me to his apartment and then when I woke up I asked him if he would be the one to take my virginity and after a lot of convincing from me that if he didn't do it I was going to ask one of those idiot frat boys instead he agreed to do it. But you have to swear to me that you'll never tell anyone because he could get in trouble with the school if this got out."
For once my best friend Jamie is completely dumbfounded; in fact she kind of looks like EJ did when I asked him to take my virginity.
"Jamie, you don't think I'm a slut for asking EJ do you?"
She just stands there all quiet and contemplative kind of like she used to do when I would tell her of the latest stunt I would come up with when I thought I could win Austin away from Carrie, but this is totally different.
I mean EJ is a man, all man, the way he looked at me tonight is something I'll never forget and those kisses were out of this world amazing.
Jamie takes my hands and leads me to sit down on my bed, her voice has turned serious on me all of the sudden. "Are you sure about this Sami? I don't want you to get hurt."
"I care about him Jamie," is all that I can say god knows it doesn't make sense, but I do.
"Do you think he cares about you?"
"He tried to talk me out of it, but I wouldn't listen."
"Maybe you should reconsider," Jamie is being completely honest which is why I love her like a sister, well like the sister I always wanted since Carrie is such a bitch to me.
"I won't say anything to anyone and I'll be here for you no matter what, but I really think you need to think of the ramifications of what this could mean for both of you."
I hate it when Jamie gets all grown up and is the voice of reason because a huge part of me knows what she is saying to me is because she doesn't want to see me heartbroken if things go wrong and most times with me if anything can go wrong, it will.
"Jamie, I think I'm falling in love with him. I mean I can't speak for EJ, but I know he feels something for me. I've never felt this way about anyone and before you say it this eclipses anything I ever claimed to feel for Austin."
She takes a minute to digest this confession from me. "I swear I won't say a word of this to anyone then, but promise me you will be careful."
I reach out to her to give her a hug, "I promise."
She hugs me back and the last thing she says to me before she gets up and goes to her bed is, "God help you both then."
I know she thinks I'm crazy, hell I think I'm crazy, but I can't help it. I'm falling in love with EJ Wells and I'm going to take this leap into the unknown with him. I think I'm starting to realize what we could have is the stuff of romance and all those flowery phrases of poetry he believes in because for once in my life I'm starting to believe in those things too.
God help us both.