Sorry for the delay in updating, I had a busy co-writer.
-AlvonFan4Life19
"Alvin Seville, if you do not stop dragging me wherever it is you're taking me, I will rip off your hand and slap you with it! Do you hear me?" Brittany snapped, yanking her wrist free from Alvin's hold and glaring at him.
"Yes I hear you, Brittany. Who can't hear you?" Alvin snapped back, tossing his arms out in exaggeration.
Brittany decided to ignore the comment this time, and instead folded her arms, if only to prevent him from grabbing her again. "Is there a good reason for why you decided to drag me out of school before I could grab my things?" Alvin rubbed the back of his head. He came up with nothing.
Brittany glared at him once more.
"Please tell me you have a reason," she said. Alvin cleared his throat and looked away. He did, just not one he wanted to voice aloud. "Alvin, you are becoming weirder and weirder as the days go on." She rolled her eyes and turned to walk away. She stopped and looked back at him, opening her mouth to say something, but decided against it and walked off.
Alvin sighed.
'You know that you can't run from this realization,' that damned voice popped into his head again. Alvin sat on his bed, allowing the voice to penetrate his mind. 'You love him. Admit it.'
I-I can't love Simon… Alvin thought, feeling his heart constrict at the thought. Our relationship is purely physical…
'But your emotions got added into the mix.' Alvin shook his head. No. He refused to believe it. 'Just admit it. You love your younger brother.'
"No, I don't. I can't!" Alvin whispered aloud, covering his ears with his hands, his eyes clenched closed. He loosened the grip on his ears and opened his eyes partially. "Simon would…never love me. So…I can't love him…"
Simon had left Alvin alone since they got home from school. Maybe he just needed time to himself. It wasn't that he was suspicious of whatever Alvin was doing. But the fact that he was certain Alvin was avoiding him was becoming clearer. He didn't know what to think of it. Had he done something wrong?
He tried to think back to any recent issues they'd had but couldn't think of any that occurred since the attic. Alvin had been steering clear of him since then. He really needed to talk to Alvin. He just didn't know when. He lowered his gaze to his laptop, becoming increasingly concerned for his brother.
Alvin paced in his room, trying to do all he could to get the thoughts either out of his head or free from the subject of Simon. 'You do realize that the more you deny it, the more it's true, right?'
The problem as of late, Alvin thought to himself was that his body was wanting something that he wasn't sure he wanted - not from Simon, not from Brittany, not from any guy, nor any woman. It didn't matter to him; it'd all turn out the same anyways. Every time he saw a couple holding hands, kissing, or doing whatever, every time he saw any kind of reference to sex in movies or on television, he was immediately turned off.
Though he was far removed from the latter, as he was sitting in the back of class again, clearly not paying attention, but deep in thought nonetheless (this particular teacher had given up long ago on trying to discipline Alvin for not paying attention - somehow the grades were adequate, and he wasn't causing a scene like he used to), and nobody was engaging in hidden displays of affection, his thoughts were on those people hell-bent on practically turning two bodies into one.
He couldn't help himself. All of those men and women were essentially using one another for their own selfish gains - he was sure of it. It was the way he felt about Simon, all those days and weeks leading up to the incident in the attic; he wasn't ashamed to admit that now. All those times he so much as grazed his skin along Simon's, every kiss, every intimate moment they shared built up to one thing - a release. It was a release that both he and his brother had felt, one that he had claimed for his own.
It took him awhile to realize it, but the whole 'love' thing, 'relationships', they were nothing but a cruel disguise for self-fulfillment, self-pleasure - that was all, and nothing more. Boyfriends and girlfriends, husbands and wives, lovers - all of them were just elaborately constructed closed fists or extended fingers. Simon and himself fit that description all too well.
He scoffed silently at the thought of himself and Simon, it immediately made him sick. His thoughts were all proven right with how Simon had been acting since the attic. He could tell Simon had no clue what had gone wrong at that time. And how his angry demeanor seemed to take a complete 180 afterward proved he was right. He had been nothing more than a method for Simon to have his release and that was it. If it was to be anything more, Simon would have made sure he had a good experience too. But all Simon cared about was himself.
That's fine Alvin thought to himself. I won't make that mistake again. The bell ending the period went off and as everyone stood to leave they were given their homework at the door. Alvin rolled his eyes as he snatched the assignment, not caring if he caused a paper cut, and stormed out of the classroom. Next class was P.E.
Alvin pulled on his P.E. uniform and slammed his locker shut.
"Jesus, Al," one of his friends on his left said. "What's been up with you lately?" Alvin ignored him as he sat on the bench and put his shoes on.
"I think he needs to get laid," another friend joked. Alvin stopped in the middle of tying his shoe and turned an icy hot glare at his friend, making the laughter stop dead. "Oh come on, don't tell me you lost your sense of humor!" Alvin pulled his other shoe on and tied it. He stood, adjusted his top and stalked past his friends and locker mates, cutting his eyes as the one who made the comment.
Get laid, Alvin thought, his arms folded as he waited for his team to form. That's the very last thing I need. They were playing tag football today. Alvin hoped some of his frustration could escape him through this hands-on sport.
When both teams were formed, the coach set the belts with their flags attached into the center of each group. When both teams were ready, the coach reinforced the rules and allowed them to play.
At the end of the school day, Simon, Theodore and the Chipettes all waited for Alvin so they could walk home like normal. They saw him exiting the building with his friends.
"I still can't believe you tackled him!" one person said. Alvin smiled with a shrug.
"Coach was so mad!" another friend laughed. Alvin did as well and then he saw the others waiting for him.
"I'll see you guys tomorrow," Alvin said. They all nodded and Alvin made his way to the group and led them off the campus and on the trek home.
Jeanette walked alongside Simon and asked, "Have you figured out what's wrong with him yet?"
"No, he won't talk to me," Simon answered. "I'll talk to him tonight."
The three brothers sat at the kitchen table doing their homework while Dave cooked. Dave had loosened his reigns a little with the older brothers since they barely had any conflicts. Not to mention little to no conversations. He was becoming increasingly worried for them.
Alvin wanted to hurry and finish his homework, eat dinner, and get the hell out of the same room as his younger brother. Despite everything, his damned body still reacted whenever he was in close proximity to him.
But this evening wasn't on his side.
After their homework and before dinner, Alvin took a quick shower. Once finished with that, he wrapped a towel around his waist and left the bathroom, going towards his room. Just before he put his hand on the doorknob, he heard Simon call his name. His hand twitched with annoyance and he clenched his jaw, stifling a growl.
Simon approached Alvin, his eyes running along Alvin's exposed skin. His brother's long hair was neatly matted against his head, framing his face perfectly. His chest, back and abs were well defined for their age, not too much so to look weird, but just enough to know Alvin was indeed athletic. His older brother was—in a word—gorgeous.
Alvin tossed a look over his shoulder at Simon before facing him, folding his arms over his chest. "What?" he spat out in annoyance. Simon was shocked at the tone.
"I-I just wanted to talk to you. We haven't talked in a while…" Simon said, keeping eye contact as he stood in front of Alvin. Last thing he knew he should be doing was eying Alvin's body.
"I haven't really been in the mood to talk, Simon," Alvin retorted, speaking with the same harshness Simon had in the attic. Simon blinked.
"I don't understand. What's wrong?" Simon asked. Alvin was more than ready to answer the question. But the fact that Simon had to ask really set him off.
"If you don't know, then I won't tell you," Alvin said and went into his room, barely resisting the urge to slam the door behind him.
Simon stared at the closed door with mixed emotions. He was hurt by Alvin's anger with him and confused with why it was there. What had he missed?
Alvin scarfed down his food at dinner, still maintaining his goal of hightailing it out of there as soon as possible.
"Alvin, slow down before you make yourself sick," Dave said, watching Alvin with surprised eyes. Alvin swallowed a bit that was only half ready for it and eased the process with some water before looking at Dave.
"Sorry Dave," he said, and humored his dad by slowing down, mostly because he was only a bite or two from finishing now.
Simon watched Alvin, determined to get the issue out of him before the night was over.
After helping Dave clean up the kitchen, Alvin made quick haste upstairs, leaving his brothers behind.
Despite his goal to talk to Alvin as soon as he could, his responsible nature had him stay behind to ensure Dave needed no more help. "I can finish up from here, Simon. Thank you. You go ahead and get ready for bed now."
Simon nodded and left the kitchen, going upstairs and stopping at Alvin's door. He knocked twice, using the same method they would use when sneaking around behind Dave's back. He wasn't given a response. He knocked again and this time heard movement and Alvin opened the door.
"What?" he snapped. Simon narrowed his eyes at his brother's tone and folded his arms over his chest.
"I want to talk to you," he said. Alvin rolled his eyes.
"Well I don't wanna talk," he replied and moved to shut his door. Simon stopped the action with his hand and glared at Alvin.
"No, Alvin. We're gonna talk. Now," he stated firmly and pushed against the door, opening it. Alvin glared at him, but Simon saw the brief fear that shot through his eyes.
Alvin backed up as Simon entered the room and shut the door behind him. "You talk all you want. But I'm not saying a word," Alvin said and sat on the edge of his bed.
Simon rolled his eyes and went over to Alvin, leaning against the bed. "Why are you so upset with me?" Alvin said nothing. "You're acting like you were before we got stuck in the attic." Alvin's heart skipped a beat at the mention of that moment, but he didn't falter outwardly.
Simon straightened up and turned, leaning against Alvin's bed, his arms folded on it and resting his cheek against them, looking at his brother. He studied Alvin's face. There was a blush, Simon had seen Alvin blush many a times it was easy to notice now. He was still glaring ahead, but he seemed nervous now.
"Alvin, talk to me," he pressed gently. Alvin shook his head vigorously, not looking at Simon. "If you don't know, then I won't tell you." Alvin's words bounced around in his head. Simon figured whatever was bothering Alvin, he knew about it. It's almost like the moment in the attic hadn't helped Alvin the way it helped him…
Simon thought back to that encounter.
Alvin glanced at his brother, seeing he was thinking. He felt dread filling him at the idea of Simon remembering the encounter. He had done his very best to hide that he had been in pain when they had sex. So maybe Simon wouldn't know about it. He hoped Simon wouldn't figure that detail out.
Simon's eyes practically shot out of his skull when he was done thinking. "Alvin," he breathed out. Alvin shook his head once more. "Alvin, why didn't you say anything?"
"I told you I don't feel like talking," Alvin retorted, his heart racing. He knew Simon would figure it out, he just hoped he wouldn't.
Simon stood up straighter, a seriousness in his eyes. "Alvin, I practically-"
"Don't," Alvin cut him off. "Don't say it! I said yes, Simon. I asked you to do it. Don't even consider calling it that."
"But…" Simon was shocked. Had he been so caught up in himself, his own frustration, to not think of Alvin that whole time? "Did you feel any pleasure at all?"
Alvin bit his lip and looked away.
Simon was completely overwhelmed with remorse. He had done something terrible. Sure, Alvin had consented, but he hadn't given Alvin a second thought. He hadn't even prepared him! And it was his first time too!
"So, you've been sexually frustrated since then?" he asked. Alvin didn't answer. "Don't you want me to help you?"
"No," Alvin answered quickly. "No, I don't want anything from you." Simon remained silent. "Can you go now?" Simon nodded despite Alvin not looking at him and left his room silently. Alvin had to check to make sure the door was closed and then lay back on his bed.
He managed to avoid admitting his hidden feelings. And he hadn't been tempted to hit Simon. All in all, it went better than he had expected.
I hope this chapter was worth the wait. Don't complain about the length, it was the best I could do. Anyway, thanks for reading, and please review!