A/N: I don't own Mass Effect or Halo. Those belong to Bioware and Bungie. Note: this fic has spoilers for Mass Effect 2, Halo 3, and Halo Wars. All rights belong to the aforementioned game companies, and this fic has violence, language, and an AU universe for ME3.

On a side note, I've finally beaten Halo: Reach! That means, the weapons from Reach will probably be involved, or mentioned, I haven't decided which yet.

Responses to reviews:

Yeah, what makes you guys think that I like making Ash into an Alliance spy? Don't worry though, that will be corrected very soon. In one way, or another.

I do see Cerberus as a morally ambiguous organization, but it's one that I like working for, and one that actually respects my talents, unlike the Alliance, which had me go and handle all their dirty laundry, they always picked me instead of any of the other N7s. I mean, COME ON! Call in another N7 to handle the jobs, or even just some basic marines; don't have the N7 Spectre handle all of your dirty laundry, just because he's a Spectre. Pricks.

Shepard didn't exactly escape Mindoir without scars, something that many writers tend to forget. Watching your friends/family/most everyone you know getting slaughtered/mutilated/tortured by Batarians isn't known for instilling good mental health in a person, and Torfan didn't help matters in the slightest. Let's just say, it's better to be his friend than his enemy. He's loyal to his friends, but God help you if you're an enemy.

Of course I'm going to save the crew. Like I said, he's loyal to his friends, and why wouldn't Shepard bring all the heavy weapons? He's got a plan, and it's one with lots and lots of Collector cruor being spilled while he saves his friends.

Chapter quote:

"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

—Teddy Roosevelt

Chapter Begins:

The specter of the Normandy flying through a massive fireball stunned the bridge crew of the Fire for a second, but then they saw the Normandy fly right out of the fireball, a bit singed perhaps, but it was intact. Then they noticed that the Normandy was acting a bit sluggish, and that it was leaning to one side. Then to their horror, the Normandy crashed onto the station's surface, skidding in a manner that the Cerberus designers had most certainly not planned for in their simulations.

Inside the ship, the situation was comparable to being in a can that was going through a paint shaker on high speed while an earthquake was going on. In Mordin's lab, beakers and other fragile glass things were shattering, and sending fragments flying around the lab. Mordin was forced to seek cover under a table, while shards of glass flew around the room. Similar scenes were playing out in the Medical Lab, and in the Mess Hall. Thane Krios, who had been getting a snack, had to call upon his training as an assassin to dodge a large bottle of olive oil, which shattered on the deck.

Fortunately for the ship, the Armory's backup Mass Effect generators prevented any of the weapons from flying around, and potentially detonating. Unfortunately for Jacob and Ash, the fields only affected the weapons and their tables, which meant that they were forced to grab onto the Jesus bars (1) installed on the ship's walls for just such an emergency.

The Spartans had tried to use the bars, but the problem was that they weren't designed with a person who was wearing 1100 pounds of armor in mind, so the bars were ripped from their mountings with the first major shake. They were forced to simply magnetize their boots, and call upon their training in zero-G to prevent them from vomiting. They did however, keep their footing, but with great difficulty, even with the added grip the magnetized boots gave them.

When the Normandy slammed into the station, the jolt sent everyone flying to the ground, save Captain Cutter, who was caught in midair by Jerome, and Commander Shepard who managed to catch a Jesus bar with his right hand in the nick of time to prevent himself from slamming into the deck.

Once the shaking had subsided, the lights, which had been switched off by Cortana or EDI just before the collision, slowly flickered to life. Many of the main lights were shattered, the bulbs having been shaken right out of their sockets, and then smashed against their holders. The red auxiliary lights began kicking in, bathing the ship in an eerie red light. Shepard suddenly had a flashback to the destruction of the original Normandy, and yelled out, "EDI, damage report!"

EDI's projector by Joker's chair, where Joker was too busy trying to hold still and avoid grating his very likely broken ribs together, flickered to life, and she said" The Normandy has suffered no critical damage, but we will need to reinstall most of the regular lighting, and in addition, we need to clean up a large quantity of shattered glass from much of the ship's decks. Fortunately, all systems are rebooting now."

As she spoke, the displays in the CIC rebooted, showing a blue screen with white text, but a second later, after Shepard had "accidentally" slammed his fist into a random console(2), the screens showed their normal orange color. Shepard walked over to the PA control, and pressed the "ALL DECKS" button, and said "Everyone who can walk and shoot, meet me in the conference room. If you can't do that, sound off, and someone will be along to get you to Medlab."

He walked to the Armory door, and pressed the open command on the door. The door control flashed red, and refused to open. His fist clenched, and he slammed it hard into the door control. Unfortunately for his hand, the controls were holographic, so his hand just slammed into the blast door. If Shepard hadn't been given reinforced bones due to the LAZARUS project, he'd have probably broken his hand and fingers. As it was, he nearly fractured two fingers. Clutching the unlucky hand with his other one, he viciously kicked the door with his armored boot. Fortunately for Shepard, that activated a proximity sensor, and opened the door, before Shepard could hurt himself further.

The Armory was a mess. Olive green UNSC crates were scattered around the room, with some of them leaking white foam packing peanuts, and one was even cracked in a couple places. In addition, thermal clips, gun cleaning parts, and even some metal blocks that were used to reload the guns ammunition supply were scattered everywhere.

Ash and Jacob were busy trying to stand steadily on their feet, after being shaken around for so long, their equilibrium was more than a little messed up. Ash wiped a smear of gun-cleaning gunk off her visor, and looked around at the mess. Fortunately, none of the weapons were damaged, so she, Jacob, and Shepard were able to easily clean up the room so one could walk through without slipping on a loose thermal clip.

Shepard then walked into the conference room, followed by Ash and Jacob. Once inside, he noticed that eveyroene was there, and they were all split up into small "cliques". Mordin, Tali, Grunt, and Garrus were busy checking their firearms, while Miranda, stood by the wall, and seemed to be doing a meditative biotic exercise along with Samara. Thane and Jack were busy checking their kinetic barrier generators, seeing how they were relying on those shields to be their only protection. Legion stood alone, apparently checking that his runtimes would be running at optimum efficiency during the assault.

Then Shepard looked at the Spartans. Red Team was busy getting acquainted with some of the Normandy's M8 Avenger rifles, checking the sights and heft of the rifles, while Chief sighted down the barrel of his M15 Vindicator. The low murmur of conversation stopped almost immediately, as everyone looked up to see who had come in. Shepard walked over to the conference table's controls, and said "The Collectors attacked our ship. They took our crew, our friends. They think we're helpless. They're wrong. They started a war, but we're not here to finish it. We're here to make them regret - to show them and everyone else what happens when you go too far. No more running, no more waiting. Let's hit them where they live. EDI bring up the base's schematics."

On the holographic display, a holographic display of the base appeared. Shepard gestured to a massive chamber, which took up much of the station's room, and said" That's our objective. We've detected much of the station's power being diverted to this chamber, which makes it a prime target for us. The only ways in are locked by a pair of blast doors, but the controls for overriding them can be reached if we send someone through this ventilation shaft, here."

Citadel, Councilor Anderson's Office, 0845 hours

Councilor Anderson settled into his desk chair, and opened his extranet terminal. Once it was open, he scanned through his email list, deleting the spam that had somehow made it through his spam filters, and opening and decrypting the others. The emails were standard fare, invites to the Alliance Veterans Memorial Ball, requests from Earth to see about getting Council approval into researching some limited genetical enhancements, requests from Terra Firma, and even a request from a Ms. Al-Jilani, a reporter who had interviewed Shepard in the past, and was seeking to re-interview him. That email, he forwarded to Shepard, mainly because he knew that Shepard would get a laugh out of that sort of email.

Ms. Al-Jilani had tried to interview Shepard two years ago, and her bias towards humanity over other species had not sat well with Shepard, whose reaction to her claims that he was a "Pawn to the Council" involved some very choice profanity, and having Tali overload her drone camera, destroying Jilani's footage. She had complained to the Alliance, but unfortunately for her, she had done a story the week before, that had insinuated that the average Alliance marine was "overpaid, underworked, and totally uncaring towards humanity's future, and more concerned with getting drunk than their duties." Needless to say, her complaints were ignored, and she was banned from setting foot on an Alliance vessel or facility as long as she lived. (3)

She had been also demoted following the loss of an expensive drone camera, which hadn't helped the situation. Then she had later run into Shepard, and had once again tried to interview him. The only problem was that her questions very obviously loaded, and she was embarrassed yet again, as Shepard pointed out that the Alliance's sacrifices made at the Battle of the Citadel were not made lightly, and that she should respect the dead better.

He noticed another email, originating from Commander Shepard's extranet account address. He opened it and it read:

Old friend,

I'm writing this to let you know that we're going through the Omega-4 Relay in a few hours. The Collectors boarded the Normandy while I was away, and abducted my crew, save for Joker. I'm going to get them back. In addition, this email contains some attached files, listing all the information that we've collected on the Collectors (hah, hah, hah) and some other bits of data that you might find interesting. However, the most shocking discovery that we've made is that the Collectors were Protheans!

Anderson, who had been sipping a cup of Jamaican Blue Mountain Coffee, had a spit take (4) as he read the last sentence, sending the coffee flying over the screen. He wiped the coffee off with a nearby napkin, and continued reading.

Now that you've finished having a mild heart attack at that shocker, I should let you know that we've also picked up a couple new members of my team. One is a Geth, and get this! Not all the Geth want to exterminate all organic life! In fact, they've got no qualms about letting us go our own ways, and they may even ally with us against the Reapers when they come.

We also picked up a human who, apparently came from a alternate universe, and I'm sure that Ashley's told you all about him, so I won't go into detail, as I'll let the attached files do the speaking for me.

Hope to speak to you after I'm done with the Collectors. We've got a lot to talk about, especially regarding the Alliance.

Upon reading the final sentence, Anderson reached over to his desk's built-in intercom, and pushed the button for his secretary. When she answered, Anderson said"I need to talk to the Council, right away."

Rannoch orbit

The Geth had been puzzled at Durendal's(5) request, but they had seen it as a challenge to their skills. Getting some of the materials was difficult, but it was manageable, given the data that had been included with the request. The request had been for a body to look identical to a human female (6), down to the genetic level, and to also be anatomically correct at the same time. In addition, the body had to be capable of enduring a series of modifications that would substantially boost the host body's strength, reflexes, and senses.

In addition to those requirements, they had to make the body so that its brain was more or less designed similar to a Geth hub, where a program could download itself into a new body if need be. The body was at last complete, and ready for Durendal.

The bar you find above your seat in a car, used by the passenger(s) as an emergency support. They're called that because the holder is usually shouting "Jesus Christ", or various obscenities when in use.

Percussive maintenance. Time honored tradition of fixing troublesome equipment by smacking it with something, usually a fist.

I'll let the readers decide the final fate of Ms. Jilani, so state your choice as to which option suits your perceived punishment for her.

Shepard files a defamation suit against her, and gets her fired and bankrupts her at the same time.

Shepard sits down with her, and reveals that he bought up the majority stock of the news station, and that she's fired. And she's blacklisted from ever working in the media industry again.

Shepard/ Cerberus arrange an "accident" involving her aircar, its brakes, and a terminal collision with a building. Bailey covers up any obvious signs of foul play.

Shepard does an interview with her rivals, and reveals that all Jilani's scoops and reports are based on biased news and twisted facts. She's ruined, fired, and blacklisted from the media industry.

Who says tropes are all bad?

Those of you know who Durendal is get a +5 Internet

She's not a blonde, she's not wearing a red dress, and she's not going to be reappearing inside anyone's head as a hallucination. That being said, NO Cylon jokes!