Hotch is front and centre as his child begins to enter the world and the rest of the team learns that field experience of capturing UNSUBs has nothing on a tiny, squirming little baby about to make its debut. And in the tradition of Christmas and my knack for throwing in an occasional twist, if you want to know if the baby is a boy or girl before reading any further, the clue is in Chapter 12.
Mary, Did You Know?
Hotch caught the gloves. "What am I supposed to do?"
"I know what I'd like for you to do," JJ snapped.
"Do I want to know?"
"I get down where Dave is and YOU can have this baby!"
Hotch snapped the gloves on. Dave laid a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Sorry, Aaron, but you're out of options."
"I'm not sure what to do." Hotch's face showed his distress and concern.
"Weren't you there when Jack was born?" Morgan inquired as he tried to focus on anything but JJ breaking his hand.
"I held Haley's hand, but Jessica was her Lamaze coach and the staff did everything else." He had been allowed to cut the cord, but that was all and once that task had been done, he had been ushered out of the delivery room while Haley was cleaned up and moved to a room. "I'm not prepared for this."
"It's relatively easy," Dave encouraged. "You stay down there and wait while JJ does the hard part."
Hotch glanced down at JJ. Uncertainy flitted across his features.
"Think football," Morgan suggested. "JJ is the quarterback and you are the receiver. She's going to snap the ball, and it's going to be your job to catch it."
Hotch's eyebrows knit together in bewilderment. "What?"
"Aaron, don't listen to him," Dave cut in, "he's never delivered a baby. Think of childbirth like baseball. JJ is the pitcher, and this bed is the mound. She's winding up to deliver a perfect strike down the middle. You're the catcher. Just make sure you do your job."
"Amazing!" JJ gasped between contractions. "You're using sports analogies to compare my labour to! Is it too late for one of you to run back and get PG?"
Morgan grasped her hand. "I'm afraid it is, Angel Face."
"Aw, crap." Tears of self-pity leaked from her eyes.
"Uh, Hotch, she's crying," Morgan spoke up.
"It's okay, Jayje; everything is going to be alright," Hotch assured as he tried to position himself between her thighs. He tried to remember the quick two hour course he had taken with Haley during one of her Lamaze classes.
"No, it isn't. I can't kick you."
"Consider yourself lucky, Aaron," Dave joked, "Em wears combat boots."
"Your turn is coming, Rossi," Morgan pointed out.
"No," he denied with a shake of his head. "Em is staying in the hospital until the baby arrives. I don't care how much it costs."
Hotch looked down. "I think I see something."
"Is it flat and pale?" Dave asked.
"I think so."
"It's the head." Dave wrapped an arm around JJ. "Okay, Jen, on the next contraction, I want you to push with everything you have."
"I don't think I want to do this; not with you guys," she argued.
"Yes, you do." Dave watched her breathing. "On three. One. Two. Three. Push!" In unison, he and Morgan lifted her upright. "Eight. Nine. Ten. Okay, let her down."
"This really hurts," JJ cried. "Not like when Henry was born."
"Not as much as my hand does," Morgan griped.
"The head is out!" Hotch announced excitedly.
"Stick your finger in its mouth and take out anything it can choke on," Dave ordered.
"Okay." Hotch did a sweep. "Now what?"
"This next push," Dave directed at JJ and Hotch, "is going to get the shoulders out. The first shoulder is going to come out. Aaron, you need to reach in and pop out the second one. Okay, Jen, are you ready?"
"No." Her look was pleading and heartbreaking.
"That's a girl," he encouraged. "On three." Dave braced her as she pushed with everything she had.
JJ tried to catch her breath as she fell against the pillows. "I can't do this. I want to go home."
"Once this is over, I'll take you home," Hotch answered.
"No you won't."
"I promise. Help me get this baby out, and I'll take you and the boys back to my place."
"See, Jayje? It's going to work out," Morgan told her as he brushed back her hair. "Let's get this baby born and then I can tell Baby Girl that I did my good deed for the year."
JJ tried to catch her breath. "I hate you."
Morgan looked flummoxed. "You hate me?"
"I hate all of you," she sniffed.
"Is that normal?" he asked.
"Yes," Dave replied. "Hotch, now you have to turn the baby."
Hotch worked efficiently. "Done."
"That's good. This is the last push, Jen."
"Can't do it," she argued.
"Yes, you can. One good push, and Morgan and I are going to help. Ready?"
She grabbed Morgan's arm tightly. "Okay." She braced herself for the pain as her body contracted and refused to release.
"Push! Push! Push!" Dave commanded. "Keep pushing!"
"I am!" she shouted, half wild from pain.
"Push harder! Almost there!"
"It's here!" Hotch shouted as a loud cry filled the air. "It's here!" he repeated softer.
"Stay with her, Morgan," Dave ordered and moved over to where Hotch was holding the squalling infant. "Measure six inches and tie off the cord while I get the scissors."
"What is it?" JJ asked and tried to push herself up on her elbows.
"It's a boy!" Hotch replied, the tears running from his eyes. "A perfect little boy."
"Let's hurry and get him wrapped up so he doesn't lose body heat," Dave remarked and grabbed a couple of towels. Quickly he swaddled the newborn and handed him back. "Go take him to his momma."
Hotch walked over to the side of the bed. "You want to see him?"
JJ moved the terry cloth back. "Hello, Pumpkin," she greeted the tiny red infant with a shock of blonde hair. "How are you?" The baby stared at her with unfocused eyes and smacked his lips. "Hungry already? Give me a few minutes." She stroked his soft cheek with her forefinger.
In the distance, a phone rang.
"Hotch?" Reid shouted out. "Your phone is ringing!"
"Take a message," he shouted back.
"It's Garcia!"
"Take a message!"
Another phone rang.
"What is this? Grand Central Station?" Dave asked as he waited for the contraction that would expel the placenta.
Morgan took in the moment. JJ had been such a trooper. Maybe the childbirth thing wouldn't be so bad with Pen, he pondered the possibility, while at the same time Dave was debating renting out the room Em was currently in for the next seven months.
JJ felt another pain. "Guys?"
Morgan jumped up. "What?"
"I feel another contraction coming on," she gasped.
"Impossible!" Morgan contradicted. His eyes flicked downward to the sheet covering the lower part of JJ's body. "Dave, look at her stomach. It's moving! I don't think it's supposed to be doing that!"
"I have to push!" JJ struggled to sit up. Her fingers dug deep into the comforter for support.
A knock on the door interrupted them. "Hotch? Can I come in?"
"Not now!" Morgan shouted.
Dave positioned himself down between JJ's legs. "This is not good. One, two, three…push!" he ordered.
"What is happening?" Hotch asked as he tried to quiet his newborn son. Too many years of training helped keep the fear in check, but he still felt helpless as Dave and Derek tried to help JJ.
"Push more! More! More! Dammit, Derek, help her push!"
JJ let out a guttural cry as Morgan helped her bear down. Suddenly, without warning, a squirming newborn lay in Dave's hands. He blinked in confusion as he tried to comprehend what had just happened. At that same moment, the door opened and a flash caught them by surprise.
"I got it," Reid remarked triumphantly into the phone at his ear. "Em and Garcia want to know what it is."
"A girl," Dave shouted out.
"A boy," Hotch answered.
Reid looked at them in confusion. "It can't be both. That's impossible."
"Not if it's twins, boy genius," Morgan quipped with smile.
"Twins?" Reid sputtered. He held a phone to each ear. "Did you guys hear that? It's twins. What? Hold on. Derek, it's for you." He handed one phone to his friend.
"Hi, Baby Girl," Morgan greeted. "Just want you to know that we are getting you the best doctors and hospital. Oh hell no! I am not delivering our child!" He paused to reconsider his statement. "Alright, I'll be in the delivery room." He got up and walked out of the room.
"JJ, are you alright to talk to Emily?" Reid asked.
"Sure." She took the phone. "Emily? I guess you heard. A boy and a girl," she cried. "They were all amazing. I know. At least he's ready for when it's your time. I know…"
Hotch looked at his best friend. "Guess we can add mid-wife to our resumes."
"Good thing, because we're going to have to do this two more times," Dave joked, as he wrapped the new little girl up warmly and handed her to Hotch.
"Speak for yourself; my job is done," Hotch replied with a shake of his head as he looked down at his son and daughter cradled in each of his arms.
"Well, go take the babies and get them bathed while I send Morgan out to call the EMS. I'm going to get JJ cleaned up," Dave instructed.
"Dave? Em wants to talk to you," JJ said and held the phone out.
Taking off his gloves, he wiped his hands on his jeans before taking the cell. "Hi, Tesoro. Yeah, she did real good. I'll send you a picture as soon as we get things settled down. I love you, too. Talk to you later." He hung up.
"Thank you, Dave," JJ whispered and gripped his hand tightly. Love and admiration shone in her eyes.
Reaching out with his free hand, he brushed a lock of hair from her face. "You're welcome, Cara. Let's get you ready to meet your son and daughter."