Chapter 14. –A useless feeling

Guilt is a useless feeling. It's never enough to make us change direction –only enough to make you useless.

~Daniel Naverl

Liza's POV

I still couldn't believe it. For the past two years, we had never been safe. We had been watched, by the man I feared the most. "This is all my fault!" I cried. "If only I had filed a claim when he first threatened to do this…"

Mr. Vega interrupted me. "Liza, you cannot blame yourself for this. It just isn't your fault." He announced the last sentence clearly. "But I could have known!" Tears were running down my face again.

Mr. Vega stood in front of me now, and he grabbed me by my shoulders. "Listen to me. This isn't anybody's fault. Only if anyone has kidnapped Jade, that person is to blame. And nobody else." He announced the word 'if'.

"It's true you know." Beck stood up. "I mean, ever since I heard she was gone, I blamed myself for not checking on her. For not insisting more on coming anyway, after she told me not to. But it isn't my fault. And it's not your fault either."

I pulled him in a hug, and we both cried. We both cried for the same girl, who we both loved with all of our hearts.

…

We had been here for hours now, still not knowing anything. "What time is it?" I asked. "Almost six AM." Tori answered. That meant that it already had been four hours since I found out that my baby was gone.

"What's his name?" I didn't have to ask who Beck was talking about. "Ronald. Ronald Scott." It almost hurt to say his name. "When did you get divorced?"

Tori tapped him on his shoulder. "Beck! Maybe she doesn't want to talk about it." I smiled tatty. "That's okay Tori. I think you have a right to hear this." I took a deep breath.

"We got divorced five years ago. Jade was twelve then." I took another deep breath. "He had changed. So much. When I married him, he wasn't like that. Sure, he, he was always stubborn. He had always been a hothead. But I never…" My voice trailed off. It was hard to talk about it.

"He wasn't like… what?" Beck said carefully. "Like, angry all the time. Upset about nothing. Swearing, at me and Jade." I swallowed. Tori held my hand. Funny, how these two teenagers had given me more understanding, more compassion about this in one night, than any grown up had given me in years.

"Did he ever misuse her? Or you?" Beck whispered now. I nodded my head. "Well. That depends. On what you see is misusing. But I feel he did. Emotionally, anyway. After the first time he ever hit Jade, I left." I thought about the big bruise on her cheek, which had lasted for weeks. I remembered the terrible guilt I had felt. But even more, the anger.

"It started small. He was always hard on Jade. Mean even, sometimes. I didn't realize… well. It's really so stupid." My cheeks felt wet again. "But I just never saw how much worse it came every day. I saw my daughter's pain, but somehow I didn't see it had to stop!" I almost choked on my own words.

Tori pulled me in to a hug. "That's not stupid! I understand. Really, I do." I couldn't help but cry. I let all the fear, all the guilt, and all the pain come out. And I let her comfort me.

Suddenly, Officer Vega came in. "I need everybody in my office. Right now." He sounded really worried. We all got up, and quickly stepped in to his office. "We just had a phone call. Somebody claims he has your daughter."

A jolt went through my whole body. "It's him, isn't it?" I don't know how I managed to keep my voice so calm. "Well, he didn't say that, but… Let's just listen to the conversation."

"This is the police."

"Hey, boys! I'm sure by now you've heard of this missing girl, Jade West?"

"Who are you?"

"Well, I think you know that already, don't you? Besides, I've got more important information to tell than that. Like, she's still alive. I'm sure her mother will be glad to hear that. And her cute little boyfriend, too." He laughed. "Won't be for long, tough."

"Listen, you can still keep yourself out of prison! Just tell us where the girl is, and…"

"Well how about, I don't tell you where she is, I'll have my revenge, and I'll keep myself out of prison?" He laughed again.

"We know who you are, and we will find you! Now be wise, and tell us where she is!"

"Well, I wouldn't count on that. So, even if you will find me, my revenge is more important to me. I just wanted to get you out of this uncertainty. And now you know. I have kidnapped Jade, and she is going to die." He laughed out loud.

People started talking, but I didn't hear them anymore. The room started spinning, and suddenly everything went black.