A/N: Congrats, you all have me officially addicting to this story! I would like to address some of the reviews if you don't mind…
Somecrazyshit.x: Technically, it was chapter twelve that had all those references to the book, but YES! Congrats on actually seeing that
Child Of Athena: Actually I've never experienced heartbreak let alone love. I guess I'm just really, really good at writing it from guessing!
'spunky'aardavark'4eva': Simon has been told.
ON TO THE STORY!
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from MI. But I do own this plot!
Alec watched sorrowfully as his best friend stormed in through the apartment, his cheek a blaze and fury of Tsunami. He went straight for the book, flipped the last page and tore out the fold photo booth picture of Clary and him.
He stared at it for a moment before his thumb grazed it gently. Jace's eyes closed shut and he collapsed to the floor, hitting his head repeatedly against the counter. "What have I done Alec?" He whispered, his voice a pure agony.
Alec had never seen his best friend like this, ever. It was as if he was dying every so slowly and nothing could put him out of his misery. Alec glanced away, horror and anger rushing through him.
He wanted to hate Clary so badly for doing this to Jace but he couldn't. It wasn't Clary's fault. It was Jace's fault, for taking the ridiculous dare. It was Alec's fault for setting him up with Clary in the first place. Alec had no one to blame but himself and his best friend.
Jace sat up suddenly, moving so quickly Alec could barely see him. He snatched the book up and dug through one of the drawers for a lighter and grabbed oil from above the stove. He rushed to the bathroom, the thud of the book hitting the bathtub.
"Jace!" Alec shouted, running after him. Jace was standing in front of the bathtub, which was full of flames. "Jace what are you doing?" Alec asked, yanking Jace back. His eyes flared at Alec, his arm tightening beneath his.
"I'm burning my mistakes despite the fact that not even hell's fire can replace what I've lost." Jace hissed through clenched teeth. Alec let Jace go slowly, shell-shocked. Jace clicked on the shower, putting out the flames. Smoke filled the house, setting off the fire alarms. Jace slammed a broom into each, almost shattering the frail plastic.
Jace proceeded to the fridge, gathering his beer in his arms. He placed each on the counter and began to pop of the tops. "Jace, Jace, getting drunk isn't going to help. " Alec whispered. Jace ignored him and continued to pop the tops.
"I'm not drinking away my sorrows but drowning my 'prize'." Jace muttered, pouring each beer down the sink, shattering the bottle in the trashcan. Alec watched soberly, waiting for Jace to be finished.
When Jace finally turned around to face Alec, Alec took a step back. Jace's eyes were a furious dead black and his face was lifeless, almost a pale green. He spoke slowly and softly, like he couldn't speak any faster or louder.
"You were right Alec. I wasting my life away and now, my life lays in a cold bed, sick to its stomach and wondering why oh why did it have to take so much in when he knew the consequences." And with that Jace stalked off to his bedroom, slamming the door shut.
*~*~*~*ONE WEEK LATER*~*~*~*
Isabelle and Simon sat in Clary's room, Isabelle lying right beside her and Simon kneeling at her bedside. Clary stared blankly into the space, her hands maneuvering mindlessly on the hem of her shirt. Her eyes were bloodshot, her knuckles bloodied and bruised and her stuffed animals across the room, shattered glass on sparkling on the floor.
"It's like she's dead." Simon whispered his voice pained as he stroked her hair softly. Isabelle sniffled away her tears, refusing to let Clary see how much this was hurting her.
Isabelle had to make Clary take a shower, had to force her to eat two bites of some soup and change her clothes. It was as if Clary was on autopilot and had no idea what to do.
Simon tried reading her comics, cracking jokes and playing music but Clary ignored it all, just staring blankly at the front door, which was right across from her room. Simon wondered if she was waiting for him to walk through the door.
Simon would kill him if he tried. He would kill him right then and there.
"Clary, honey." Isabelle whispered in her ear. Clary's eyes fluttered closed and she began to cry again, her eyes finding the saline to continue. Isabelle winced, her heart panging sharply.
Simon sighed and went into the living room, picking up the Sunday paper. He flicked past pages of sports and nothingness, heading for the comics when he froze, staring at the page in shock.
Five pictures, one of them walking slowly, her head on his arm. Another of them staring across the water, serene smiles across their faces. Another, their lips just barely brushing and another, interlocked in a passionate kiss. The last one was of her laughing and him smiling, the largest one.
"Last week when I was walking through the park I saw the true definition of love. These two kids were enjoying a stroll just like I and interlocked in a bubble nothing could penetrate…" Simon read aloud. Isabelle came out of the bedroom then, her eyes wide in question.
"Look, Izzy." He held the paper out and Isabelle's hands crunched the paper as she read. "And as he spoke of what he thought love was she looked up at him with a look of incredibility, as if he was still surprising her and her eyes were filled with so much passion I was sweating."
"She can't see this. She can't." Isabelle said, smashing the paper. "See what?" Clary asked, her voice flat as she stood in the doorway. They both looked up in shock, she was actually talking, and she was actually moving.
"Nothing Clary." Simon reassured her softly. Clary, slowly as if she were the tin man, moved across the room. She grabbed the paper from Isabelle's hand, smoothing it out. Recognition flickered across her face and her face hardened, tears flowing quickly down her splotchy cheeks.
Her hands tightened on the newspaper and she collapsed to the ground, curling into a ball, her body clutching the paper like a life raft. "Why'd you give it to her?" Simon hissed. "She took it!" Isabelle hissed back, dropping to her knees, rubbing Clary's back soothingly.
"I hate him…I really do." Clary whispered over and over again as she clutched his picture to her chest.
*~*~*
Jace stared at the ceiling of his room blankly, hugging a pillow to his chest. He would inhale, the last reminisce of her scent clung to that pillow. He knew Alec was worried, hell Magnus was worried but he didn't care.
He had been sober a week and he was learning quickly going through this much pain was hell twice over sober.
Alec knocked softly on his door, coming in. He had breakfast, something Jace had forgotten existed, and a paper beneath his hands. "Read the sports section. Maybe the scores with cheer you up." Alec said comfortingly.
Jace stared at his best friend, his eyes slowly becoming a permanent black. Alec sighed and walked out. Jace picked up the paper, flipping blankly through the paper until his hands stopped on a page he never wanted to see.
The article and pictures, just like that kid had promised, were on a full page. Anger swelled in his chest, his hand knocked the tray off his lap. It flew across the room, the glass shattering and the food decorating his floor. Jace threw down the paper and sat up, heading for the door. There was somewhere he had to go.
"Jace?" Alec asked worriedly. Jace ignored him storming out of the building. He went to the parking garage, finding his car easily. He glanced over at the passenger seat, Clary's image floating beside him. His heart panged sharply and he bent over against the wheel, breathless.
"She's not here." He whispered, slowly starting the car. He sped out of the parking lot and into New York traffic, weaving through the streets and cars until he reached the place he vowed never to return.
His old school.
Jace slid out of the car and walked towards the doors. School was out but they kept the building open anyways. Jace walked in easily, images of his past flittering past him. His hands ran along the lockers stopping on one. Number 209. That was his locker. He smiled softly and moved his fingers again, pausing painfully. Locker number 212. Clary's locker.
"That girl's staring at you again Jace." His buddy, Sebastian nudged him. Jace glanced over, flicking his hair out of his face to see Clary glance away sharply. She shoved her books in and scurried off, her frumpy school uniform sweater swaying as she went. "That's just Clary. Isabelle's friend." Jace said, ignoring her like always. He shut his locker and placed a cool arm over his girlfriend at the time, Aline, Sebastian's cousin. With one last fleeting glance at Clary who was standing uncomfortably by the gorgeous Isabelle who was flanked by boys, he left the school, over looking the mural.
Jace shook his head, ignoring his heart's hard thumps. He walked the same way he had that day towards the massive mural. It was mostly swirls and words, quotes and school stats. The mascot, an Angel, stood proudly in the middle. Jace looked over the people painted in the picture carefully, looking for anything that stood out.
He saw Alec's face, painted as one of the people in the stand, his dark clothes standing out in the sea of white and gold. Jace saw Isabelle, strutting blurrily. He saw Simon, bent over a book. But he didn't see himself.
He scoffed and turned away before he stopped, looking back. The angel, smirking at him, popped sharply at him. The Angels' hair was golden, tossed in meaningful disarray. His eyes, cold and mischievous were gold. There was a sharp line of his jaw and the smirking smile, he noticed on of the teeth was just barely chipped.
The angel was Jace. She hadn't lied; she had really painted him in. As an Angel. Jace stumbled backwards, hitting the lockers sharply. They rattled loudly. As he looked closer, he saw Clary, painted so she was looking up at Jace/The Angel. The reflection of Jace was painted in one of her emerald eyes.
Jace couldn't breath and his slid down the lockers, his head falling into his hands. "What have you done Herondale? What have you done?" He whispered, his breathing ragged. His fist slammed the marble floor, stinging sharply.
Jace got up and left without a second word, leaving the mural and his mistakes behind him.
*~*~*~*Three Weeks Later*~*~*~*~*
Clary sat on the couch, her heart flickering sharply. Images of Jace kept haunting her, his words echoing in her mind. She'd flinched, as her mind would whisper love. "That's not true. He lied. He never loved me." She'd mumble to herself.
She saw Isabelle watching her from the kitchen. Her heart flickered again, but for a different reason. Clary could see how Isabelle's face held a constant worry, bags from not sleeping beneath her eyes. Simon was the same, watching her from the couch. She wanted to scream that she wasn't going to start crying again, she wouldn't suddenly go mad but she wasn't sure that she truly wasn't going to do that.
Instead she let her eyes sinking into her knees as she placed her head down. Someone knocked on the door. Isabelle moved slowly, Clary could hear her coffee cup being placed on the counter. The door creaked open and Isabelle gasped.
"Isabelle…" Someone whispered. Clary shut her eyes tight. No, you're imagining this Clary. She thought to herself. He's not really there.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Isabelle hissed. "Get the hell out." Simon growled, suddenly not beside her. "Just let me talk to her. Please. I'm begging." The visitor whispered. Clary held back a scream and buried her face deeper in her knees. Her body was shaking hard.
Isabelle sighed heavily. "Absolutely not. You haven't had to watch her—" Simon began but Isabelle cut him off. "You have five minutes." Simon began to hiss something at her but their footsteps disappeared into Isabelle's bedroom.
Soft footsteps came up beside Clary. She could hear harsh breathing. "Clary?" He whispered. Clary lifted her head slowly, slamming it back down when her suspicions of Jace truly being there were confirmed.
"Please. Let me talk to you." He whispered his voice pained. Clary felt a hand touch her and her body lit up like a live wire. She flinched.
"Please look at me." Jace begged. Clary looked up slowly. Jace's breath swooshed out as he saw her face. His hand moved to touch her cheek but she flinched away. Jace winced and his hand fell into his lap.
"I can't tell you how sorry I am." He whispered. "Then don't." Clary's voice was raspy from crying so much. Jace's eyes flickered darkly. "Clary, I never, ever—" Clary cut him off.
"Meant to fall in love with me?" She said bitterly. "Yes. But I did." Jace said. Clary grinded her teeth. "Lying your way through this isn't going to help anything Jace." Clary snapped loudly. Jace jumped, as did she. They both had been living around whispers lately.
"I'm not lying Clary. I would never lie to you about loving you." He said, his heart breaking again. Jace wondered how many times his heart could break before it ran out of pieces.
"I saw the mural." Jace whispered after a few silent moments. Clary's eyes snapped up to his. Jace winced again, hating the way she looked. Her cheeks were starting to sink in; dark circles underneath dead eyes, no longer a lively green. Her hair even seemed to have lost its shine.
"You, you painted me as an Angel." He said slowly. Clary scoffed, choking back tears. She wouldn't cry anymore. Not in front of him. "Yeah, what a misunderstanding." Clary muttered.
"Clary, I didn't know." Jace whispered so softly. "Didn't know what Jace? That I've loved since I was twelve? That I've had my heart shattered by you far too many times to count?" Clary snapped again, her voice stabbing into Jace.
"No. I didn't. I wish I did. Maybe things…maybe things would have gone differently. Clary, but the thing I didn't know the most was that I loved you too. I was just too blind to see clearly Clary."
"Jace get out." Clary mumbled, her voice showing her exhaustion. "Why?" Jace asked, shocked. "Because Jace. I can't get over you if you won't leave me alone." She said, putting every ounce of pain into those words. She wanted to hurt Jace more than she had ever wanted to hurt anyone.
"Clary I don't want to get over you. I can't get over you Clary." Jace's voice came out in a single breath, harsh and ragged. "But I have to. I have to live without you Jace. I have to learn to live without you. That week was the best of my life Jace. I'll cherish that forever. But I have to move on. And so do you."
Jace numbly stood up and walked out the door without a single glance back at Clary. He couldn't stand it to her face, not ever for the last time.
The rain began to fall down on Jace and he laughed coldly. Of course the sky is crying. Someone had to. Jace, the only person without an umbrella, walked in rain, letting himself be soaked to the bone all the way home.
He didn't notice that he too had tears running down his face.