A/N: HOLY FUCK A UPDTE WHOA WHADDYA KNOW? Also plot what plot WTC has no plot idk what it talking about. ANYWAY. Here's a short, somewhat OOC oneshot that helped spark my headcanon that You is a budding taxidermist and is reALLY CREEPY ABOUT IT. Enjoy.

It's raining, and there is a dead orange cat on the side of the road.

You stoop down to look at it, crouching and leaning forward. It seems to have been hit with a square blow to the spine- you can see where the vertebrae are snapped under the thin fur and skin. Other then that, the cat's in good condition. If you work well, you can give it a whole new spine.

Yes. That will be a nice gift for the little kitty.

You gently pick up the cat, positioning him inside your hoodie carefully. You don't want him to get wet and mold- you can't fix him up then. For a second you want to open the cat's eyes but you don't want to disturb it. That wouldn't be very nice, and besides you know what they say- let sleeping cats lie. Instead you just give the cat a tiny pat on the head through the fabric and start back towards Stilldust. (Hayley was the one who named the ghost town that.)

As you walk, you ponder a name for the cat. You already have Queen, Mitch, Flappy and Ruby, so you can't name it any of those names. Maybe Dell? That seems like a good name; you'll go with that. You glance at the Dell-shaped lump again, making a soft cooing noise as you do. Precious cat is precious.

It's very quiet in Stilldust as you walk in, footsteps loud amidst the rain. Quickly you duck into the small bar that sits near the town, shaking your hair dry and pulling Dell from his place tucked in your hoodie. He is mostly dry, save his tail which had been sticking out. You hold him up to your face and give him a little smile. "Hello there, cat. My name is You. And yours is Dell." You swear you hear a meow in response.

No wait that was the door opening nevermind.

"Hey You, where have you- is that a dead cat?"

You turn at Hayley's disgruntled voice, clutching Dell to your chest. "His name is Dell," you answer hotly, glowering at her. She blinks at you, glancing from the cat to your face to the cat again. There's a deep breath. Then: "What did I say about picking up road kill?"

"He was going to get wet out there," you protest weakly. "Can't I keep him?"

Hayley rubs the side of her head and walks past you, flopping down onto a bar stool. "Fine," she says after a moment, "but he's the last one you fix up okay? The others are still really creeping me out. Which reminds me, why can't you put then away?"

You set Dell on your shoulders and cross your arms. "They're not toys!" you reply. "They just want to see you is all. They like you." She lets out a groan. "You know, I think I liked you a lot better when when you weren't as confident and didn't know you were creepy ass taxidermist." You grumble under your breath and sit on the stool next to her. "But I like being happy. And I like my pets. Don't you? I thought you'd really like Queen specifically..."

"Oh no way. That corgi freaks me out. How did you manage to make her gaze so empty? I woke up in the middle of the night yesterday, looked over at her and nearly had a heart attack!" She shakes her head. "Geez."

"Queen isn't creepy. She's just distracted all the time! I mean, she is a dog..."

"Distracted by being dead, you mean, you weirdo."

By some mysterious totally not your doing and revengeful force, Dell ends up sitting lopsidedly on Hayley's head.

Her angry screeches and the cat flying back into your arms at thirty miles per hour are so worth it.