God guys I am so damn busy it's like unbelievable! This week and next week are actually going to break me up! My teachers are assholes and my deadlines aren't over yet. I haven't been able to write at all since I places the last chapter it's so annoying! But I didn't want to make you guys wait any longer. This chapter will be the last one of season one so I'm excited for your reviews. I really want to know what you guys think about the ending. Also, next chapter (beginning of season two) is going to be sooooo nerve wrecking! Keep holding on guys because we're not there yet! Enjoy reading this one. Hope you guys like it.
Christina hadn't been able to sleep at all that night. She just lay there in Juice's arm who had fallen asleep somewhere around three at night. Around that time, Christina had moved out of bed. Now, it was about eight in the morning and Christina had done everything she thought she could and still wasn't tired. She wasn't feeling well either and something was happening to her, something very familiar too. Normally, she would feel blank, numb and wouldn't want to do anything. But right now she was buzzing with negative energy. She was angry, upset and completely frustrated with the world. Yes, it was true; the pretty princess wasn't perfect or spotless but nobody could see that. It was her secret to keep. She had been able to for years. She couldn't give up and cave now. Not now that so many people needed her.
Nymeria was laying at her feet, looking up every once in a while to check up on her owner. Christina would just nod at her, hoping it would ease the dog but it didn't. Neither did it ease her. Christina didn't even believe her own lie. Donna had been such a big part of her life that it wasn't hard to figure out why it hit her so hard. Ever since she got up, she wasn't able get Donna's smiling face from the previous night out of her head. She was such a pretty and strong woman. Christina had looked up at her ever since Opie brought her along that one night. It hadn't been long after JT's death when one night, when Opie had the honorable task of babysitting Christina, that he brought his girlfriend along with him. Christina had been sitting at the kitchen table, just pushing her food around when Donna came up. Opie had whispered to Donna not to set Christina off because she hadn't been doing well since her dad died, thinking the young girl hadn't heard him but she had. Donna had seat next to Christina, introduced herself to the little blonde girl before telling her that if she'd finish her dinner, Donna would take her out for desert. Instead, Christina had asked her to help her with her homework after dinner because Opie and Jax never seemed to understand it. Donna had agreed, helped her and had watched a movie with her after which resulted in Christina falling asleep in her lab. Ever since that evening, Donna had been there for her and didn't even judge her when her "little problem" really started showing. Other's had looked at her with pity but Donna told her to stay strong and even tried to distract Christina whenever she could. Now, Donna was gone and wouldn't be there for Christina when would be needed. For a moment, Christina had no idea who to turn to instead. Finally, she came to the conclusion that she had no idea which broke her even a little bit more.
She was at her fifth cup of coffee and smoking her fifth cigarette that day when she heard someone walking towards her from the bedroom. Looking up, Christina was able to give Juice a watery smile while he sat in front of her in just his jeans and no shirt on. 'Hey', he greeted, not really knowing how to handle this situation. He was aware of Christina and Donna being close, apparently they always had been. Donna was the only person next to Tig who checked up on her regularly while she was away for almost six years. She had told him that. 'How uhm… are you feeling?' he asked next while keeping both his eyes on her face.
Christina tried to laugh when hearing his awkwardness she liked so much but it didn't light up her eyes like it normally would. 'I don't really know actually. I don't feel sad anymore or grieve or even numbness. I just feel this massive wave of negative energy', she tried to explain him. 'It just crashed into me after I ran out of tears. Kept me awake the whole night'.
'Yeah I felt you toss and turn', he said. 'Tried to think of ways to comfort you but… I'm not really good at it as you may know now'.
'You were here Juice, that's all I wanted and all I asked of you'.
Juice just nodded before taking her coffee from her hand and sipping. 'So where did you go after you woke up?' he asked while taking yet another sip.
'I never slept. I went to see Ope though. I knew he wasn't gonna go to sleep, not willingly. I let him cry, cried some with him until he finally fell asleep. When I got back around six I went for a run with Nymeria and when I got back about 30 minutes ago I took a shower, drank four cups of coffee, you drinking my fifth, and smoked five cigarettes. Still, my head is buzzing. I have questions and it's killing me because I know I can't ask them and I won't'.
'You're part of this family, Chris. Just as much as your mom, Jax… hell even more than I am'.
'I'm not a part of the club', Christina said then which stopped Juice. 'The only thing I am is JT's little girl, Gemma's daughter and Jax's sister. I ain't dumb, Juan. I know this was club related. I'm not mad at the club for what happened. I'm mad at the universe because this had to happen to my best friend. It doesn't answer all my questions, hell it doesn't answer anything. Doesn't give me peace either'.
There was a silence. Christina tried to keep her emotions at bay while Juice tried to come up with something to say.
Christina took a deep breath before looking up again, seeing Juice's empty eyes. 'Can you at least tell me that if I had the right to know and if you knew something, you would tell me?'
Juice had to repeat her words a couple of times in his head before he nodded at her. 'Yeah, I would', he said, his voice slightly cranking with emotion.
Christina smiled at him before standing up, walking towards him. 'I have to help Mary with the planning of the funeral. Piney is mad as hell and Opie is heartbroken. They can't do it. I told her I would help. I've got about an hour before I have to meet her at the funeral home. Why don't you join me for a shower while I wait for that hour to run out?'
Juice nodded at her before standing up, letting her lead him towards the bathroom. While under need the hot water, moaning and groaning filled the room. Christina had been feeling too much negativity ever since that night. Being with Juice made her feel something to suppress all that negativity and change it into something positive. It made her feel not as broken and upset. It made her feel something else entirely. She felt wanted and… something else. Something she couldn't place just yet.
Christina walked next to Mary through the graveyard. They had a coffin, they picked flowers and made arrangement for the bikes, even though Mary wasn't a fan of it. Now, they were looking for a nice spot to put Donna to rest. They were looking for a spot in the sun but somewhere close to a tree. Donna always loved the sound of the wind blowing through the leaves.
'I haven't seen you in a long time, Christina', Mary said while looking around, her face just as cranky as Christina remembered it.
'Yes, it has been a while', she said. 'Must have been at least eight years'.
'It was December, the year you turned sixteen', she said. 'I came to pick up Opie to spend some time at my house because he wanted to spend Christmas in Charming. I didn't need a lot of help to spot you. You really were a little spitfire back then, always looking for trouble while you kept a close eye on Opie and Jax. Donna loved you for that, always being there when people needed you the most'.
'God, I remember that day. I was decorating the Samcro Christmas tree, or at least trying since I'm quite short. So in order to get to the top-'
'Opie put you on his shoulders', Mary finished before smiling half-hearted towards the princess. 'You grew up nice by yourself, Chris. I'd say that I wished you would've stayed away from this shithole but… I always knew you'd come back. So did Donna. She needed you when Opie was put in jail but she loved you too much to ask that of you'.
Christina's eyes grew sad, so did Mary's. The memory of Donna would haunt them for a long time until they would be at peace with thinking about her.
'I also knew it, that I would come back', Christina continued while walking.
'I wished you didn't', Mary put in. 'But I'm glad you're here now. Opie, Ellie and Kenny will need you'.
'I'm just glad I can help. Too bad it had to be under these circumstances though'.
Before Mary could speak again, Christina's phone went off which send the annoying ringtone over the whole graveyard. She groaned in annoyance before picking the phone from her purse. Seeing the name on the small display, she turned back to Mary for just a moment. 'I have to take this', she said before smiling at Mary. 'I'll catch up'.
Mary didn't argue and just started walking again. When she had walked away for a couple of meters, Christina picked up her phone. 'What is it Jax? I'm kind of in the middle of something', she said when picking up.
She heard her brother take a deep breath before he started talking. 'Yeah sorry I just… Can you talk to Tara tonight or something?' he asked in a small voice which didn't seem right to her. 'I talked to her this morning and uhm… she's leaving me again Chris. She's moving back to Chicago'.
Christina cursed under her breath, knowing this blow was coming. 'Shit Jax', she said while exhaling. 'Yeah, I'll drive by her house and see what I can do'.
'Alright, thanks Chris', he said but didn't hang up like he was trying to say something else but wasn't able to get it from his lips.
Christina knew her brother all too well. Even without looking in his eyes, she knew that the sadness in his voice wasn't just because Tara was leaving again. So instead of letting him bruise his brain, Christina tried to help him. 'Is there something else I can do for you, Jax?' she asked in a sober, objective voice. She wanted to let her brother know she was always gonna be there for him, no matter what.
Jax chuckled on the other end of the phone. 'I'm good, Chris', he said.
'Are you?'
Jax didn't answer. He couldn't lie to his little sister. She would hear it in his voice, she probably already had. 'No', he said honestly. 'But I can't tell you yet because I don't even know what it is that I know. Just let me sort this out and then maybe I'll tell you. The only reason I wouldn't tell you is to protect you, not because it's club shit and I think it's none of your business. Okay?'
Christina was partly relieved. It meant that her brother wanted her there with him but he also wanted to protect her no matter what. 'Yeah, I know Jax. Just know what when you're ready to tell me, I'm here for you'.
'I do Chris. Love you'.
'Love you too', she said before ending the call. She looked at it for a little while longer, not knowing what it was that Jax was talking about. But that aching feeling in her stomach, that nervous feeling like something brutal was gonna happen, had returned. And it didn't feel good at all.
It was already dark when Christina arrived at Tara's house, the Cutlass standing in the driveway which told her Tara was home. Christina stepped out of her car and started walking towards the door, knocking on the door not kindly at all. Tara soon opened the door, looking shocked as hell.
'Jesus Christ, Chris, where's the fire?' Tara said while trying to laugh it off.
'Right here', Christina told her before stepping in. 'I'm burying one of my best friends tomorrow. My other best friend is leaving, again!' she said once Tara had closed the door.
Tara looked at the ground in shame but not surprised at all. 'Jax told you', she said in a whisper. 'Look, Chris, I wanted to tell you I did but-'
'But what? And really, I'm not the issue here. I'm here because Jax called me earlier, asking me no, begging me to talk to you. He feels like you're leaving him again'.
'Chris, I can't break up this family'.
'What family? You mean that junky whore that doesn't give a shit about Abel. I don't care what she says because she never keeps a promise. All she wants is Jax. All she ever wanted was Jax and being the next Gemma. Well, newsflash; she can't keep Jax and can't keep the thrown either. She's craving it too much, just like that needle. Because when shit goes south, little Miss Wendy crawls into the darkest corner she can find and puts a needle in her arm. Tara why can't you see that you're the one he needs, the one he's always wanted and still wants?'
'Well I think I see that now', she said with a small scoff. 'Jax he… kinda… I don't know how to explain this'.
'Well start by telling me instead of trying to tell me'.
Tara huffed before putting herself down in the nearby couch. 'When he came by the hospital this morning and I told him I was planning to move back to Chicago and he kinda told me that… no matter how many women he's had sex with, the only face he ever saw was… mine'.
Christina couldn't hold a laugh. 'Did you drop your panties after he said that?' she asked.
Tara couldn't hold a laugh either. 'No but… if he hadn't left so quickly I would've probably jumped his bones'.
'Thought so', Christina said with a nod. 'Tara, how much more material do you need until you finally realize that you are the only one for him?'
Tara couldn't answer that question and just stayed silent instead.
Christina decided to let Tara think about it. She just hugged her friend before walking out the door and back towards her car.
Lucky for her, it was a short drive back to her house. Pulling her Mustang into her driveway, she wasn't at all surprised by seeing the Dyna stand in her driveway and the lights on behind the curtains. Looking at the Dyna and seeing the Sons of Anarchy design on the tank with the scythe and spotting the iPod holder and speakers, she knew it was Juice sitting inside her house.
Stepping inside and closing the door behind her, she heard Nymeria's paws coming towards her on the hard wooden floor. Christina squatted down to scratch the fast growing puppy behind her ear, making her lick Christina's hand.
'Hello there beautiful', she said. 'You missed me? Sorry I couldn't take you today. I really didn't know if it would be appropriate to bring my dog while I was arrange a funeral'.
Nymeria seemed to understand. The dog lay a paw over Christina's arm like she was telling her it was no big deal. Christina smiled because of her silly dog, always making sure she was okay. 'Is Juicy here girl? Did you let him in?' she then said.
Nymeria let out a small bark before patting towards the back and walked through the open door that led to the backyard. Stopping in the doorway, Christina saw Nymeria laying with her head on Juice's leg while one hand stroked her head, the other holding a slowly burning joint.
Christina didn't wait another second and walked over towards him, sitting herself down next to him on her porch steps. 'You found my spare key', she said with a smile while taking the joint from between his fingers before putting it between her own lips. It wasn't a question, she knew because she was sure she had closed off the door earlier that day when she'd left and she had never told him where her spare key lay.
Juice was able to put a small grin on his face. 'Yeah, I did', he answered with a nod. 'You should find a better spot than the gutter. Way to predictable. At first I thought it would be under need the mat but it wasn't'.
'Because that's not predictable', Christina said before breathing out the smoke.
Juice just nodded before accepting the joint she held out to him.
'Rough day?' she asked next while signaling to the split.
Juice just shrugged. He didn't know how to explain her about the witness, the 17-year old girl that was gonna die because otherwise she would testify against Opie and Bobby. 'You could say that', he said before taking a drag, making the little flame at the end light up. 'You?'
'Well, it's not easy trying to pick out a spot for your best friend who's gonna be buried tomorrow', she said before huffing. 'But Mary and I did it. We picked the coffin, a beautiful space in the sun, made arrangements for the bikes and picked out flowers to put on the coffin. Blue and white Carnations. She loved them, they were her favorites. They also mean pride and beauty'.
Juice listened while she talked in her soft, calm voice which was projected on him. He felt the weight he had been feeling since giving Jackson the address of the safe house slowly slide off his shoulders. Turning his head and looking at her, he couldn't help but smile, seeing her stare at the sky while small tears gathered. He understood that this situation wasn't easy on her. The strong princess was slowly cracking which concerned him a little. It was the same concern he had felt that morning while he had looked at her very tired and stern face.
Christina felt his eyes on her but she could not look at him, to afraid he was going to notice the tears trying to escape. Knowing she could only do so much until they would spill, she closed her eyes in the hope of keeping her tears at bay. 'I want to thank you', she said then to distract not only herself but Juice as well. 'Not only for staying last night but also for this morning'.
'Are you thanking me for having sex with you under need the shower?' he asked with a naughty grin on his face.
Christina had to smile as well, seeing a dark and lustful look appear when she reminded him of the mind blowing shower sex that morning. 'Yeah I guess so', she said a little embraced, feeling her cheeks turn red under need his stare. 'I was just feeling so negative and… angry'.
'Ow you were angry alright', she heard him say with a smile in his voice.
She frowned while looking up at him again, a grin pulling on her lips. 'Is that the weed talking dude?' she asked while eyeing the joint again.
Juice laughed. 'Maybe', he answered.
'Anyway', she said in the hopes of picking up where she'd stopped. 'I… guess I wanted to thank you. You didn't push me to talk about it, you didn't ask anything in return and just let me be and do what I wanted to do. That's what I needed'.
The truth was, Juice had noticed her angry expression and had been kind of nervous to ask her about the night before and what they had both seen. Normally, the princess wasn't quite the open book but that morning, he had been able to read her for the first time. She wasn't as closet of as she thought she'd been. He hadn't mind the angry, needing, willing, groping sex they'd had, not at all. It had made him worry though, just a little. 'You don't have to thank me, Chris', he answered when he had finally found his voice again. 'You obviously needed someone and I guess I needed someone too. What happened last night… that was awful shit and never should've happened'.
Christina let his words get through to her. He wasn't wrong when he said she's needed someone that night before and that morning but was that all they were? Was that why he was at her house? Because he just needed someone to warm him at night? Didn't that make her a Crow-Eater?
Christina walked into the Winston house early that morning. She would drive Ellie, Kenny and Mary in her Mustang to the funeral home while Opie and the club would drive with the hearse on their bikes. She greeted Mary with a quick kiss on the cheek before walking towards the bedroom, spotting Opie while he was fixing Kenny's blouse, Ellie waiting for them not far from the door. When she walked in, Ellie heard her heels against the floor and looked up. When seeing her aunt, Ellie stepped towards her and hugged her waist. Christina smiled a little while stroking the girl over her hair. Looking up, she saw Opie looking at her in a thankful way. Christina just nodded to him, not thinking it was a big deal at all.
'How are you doing El?' Christina asked before letting her go a little so the princess could look at Ellie's face.
The girl seemed a little hesitate. 'I… don't really know', she answered honestly. 'I just feel confused now. I was really sad yesterday but now I'm just… confused'.
'It's because you're grieving sweetie', Christina said. 'You'll be okay. It's gonna be a while but you will be'.
'I miss her, auntie Chrissie', Ellie then whispered with small tears in her eyes.
Christina looked up at Opie for a moment, seeing his broken face which made her throat swell up. Looking back down at Ellie, Christina just kissed her forehead. 'I know El. I miss her too', she said before stroking a tear away from the young girl's cheek. 'Now, go catch up with your grandma. I just wanna talk to your pops for a little bit'. Ellie nodded her head before walking away through the hallway, Kenny not far behind. Christina watched the kids disappear before closing the door which left her alone with Opie. She stepped a little closer before hugging his giant form. She felt him hug her back, his shoulders slightly shaking. When she let go of him, she spotted a single tear on his cheek. 'How are you doing, Ope?' she asked in a small voice while looking over his face.
Opie took in deep breath before letting it out. 'I'm good', he said. 'Trying to be strong for the kids'.
'You don't have to be strong all the time Ope. You have to let go eventually. You can come to me or just close the door behind you and let all those tears go'.
'I don't have any tears to cry anymore', he answered her.
Christina knew how that felt. 'Yeah, me neither. I just cried one night and then I was just angry'.
'At Samcro?' he asked.
'No. At the universe. I just keep thinking; Why? Why Donna?'
Opie looked down at the floor for a moment before putting himself down on the bed. 'It's my fault', he then said which made Christina frown her eyebrows together. 'She was in my truck Christina. What do you think that means? Huh? It means those bullets were meant for my skull. This is all my fault'.
'Don't say that', she snapped at him before sitting herself down next to him. 'This wasn't your fault at all'.
'Yes it is Chris!' Opie said with his voice raised in anger. 'Don't you get it? This happened because I am part of the club, because we didn't get out when we could. I didn't want to give it up, the club, I couldn't give it up!'
'Ope stop screaming at me!' Christina screamed back which got Opie to stop. 'Donna knew what she was asking of you', she continued in a softer voice. 'When she asked you to earn straight, to stay away from the club, she asked you too much. Because in the mean time she asked you to stay away from your dad, from you family, from the world you know. I told her that and she told me. That day I came by when you all but stormed out? I was there to check up on her because Stahl was going after all the woman, including Donna. I made that clear to her that day. She did know you were gonna go back to the club once you were out, you know that too. Still, she waited for you. She thought you were worth all that pain and heartbreak she went through while you were in jail because she loved you so damn much. Donna was a damn brave woman and even when everything went to shit, she stayed. That love the two of you had, that was worth dying for. You said it to me once, when we were younger and you and Donna were not even married yet. She thought about it in the same way, Ope. She never said it but I know because that was how much she loved you'.
Opie was in tears when she had finished. His cheeks and eyes started to redden and his shoulders shook. Christina wasted no time or space and pulled his giant body against her, his head on her shoulder.
After a little while, just letting Opie cry in her arms, they stood up. Christina pulled Opie's cut from the chair and helped him put it on. 'Let's go Gigantor. After the funeral, you can close the doors behind you and cry. For now just stay strong'.
Opie nodded before kissing her forehead. 'Thanks Chris', he whispered to her while trying to smile down at her but he wasn't able to. 'I was thinking about getting out for a while'.
'That might be not such a bad idea, actually', Christina said while opening the door and curling an arm around Opie's waist while walking next to him, Opie with his arm over her shoulders. 'I'm not sure if it will do you good but it's worth the try'.
Opie looked down at her, his eyes confused but she didn't answer. She let go of him before walking over to Mary, Kenny and Ellie who were waiting for her.
Driving behind the hoarse, in between all the bikes made Christina sort of nervous but she drove in silence. She had watched over the Redwood flock, spotted her uncles and Juice but her brother was nowhere in sight. It wasn't until they had arrived at the graveyard, all taken their seats and started saying goodbye to Donna, she spotted her brother. Christina had sat down next to Tara, giving Opie, Piney, Mary and the kids some space to say their goodbyes. Juice was standing behind her, Jackson's cut in his arms. He had explained that he left it the night before at the clubhouse and would probably need it today.
Christina had seen Gemma and Wendy arrive but had ignored them. The princess was here to say goodbye as a friend, not as a part of the club.
Seeing Jax walk closer towards them over the graveyard, Christina took the cut from Juice's arms before handing it over to Tara with a wink. 'He needs to get this from you, I think', she whispered, trying not to interrupt the priest while saying it. Tara just swallowed visibly before nodding her head and walking towards Jackson. Christina witnessed how her brother and Tara met up before she helped him into his cut, like Christina had done for Opie that morning. A slight smile pulled on her lips seeing their interaction, without words, before they kissed. Looking over at Gemma and Wendy, it was obvious they didn't like it. Christina didn't care right now. She had rooted for her friend to win this battle and helped her go through her problems. Now, Tara was facing them head on and didn't scare away like she used to do. While Jackson walked over to the flowers and picked one up to put on the coffin, Christina stood up. She had spotted the blood at the sight of Jackson's mouth and seen the stares he sent towards Clay and Tig. Whatever it was that was eating at him and wherever had happened, her step-father and uncle had been a part of it. She didn't know how but she felt this was part of the phone call she had with him the day before. It was like a brother-sister feeling; she could read it off his face. He sent their mom a look too before kissing the flower and putting it on the coffin with the others. He walked over to her, kissing the side of her head when he arrived. Christina curled an arm around his waist while Jackson pulled her closer with an arm over her shoulder.
'You okay?' she asked him, eyeing the blood on his face.
Jackson just nodded before walking towards the other graves with his loved sister right next to him, right where he wanted her. Walking over the graveyard, there were no words needed. They both knew where they were going; to the person they both talked to when needed. Christina always talked to Thomas out loud while Jackson did this in silence. While he sat on top of the headstone like he did since he was a teenager, Christina just stood next to him with a hand on his back – on top of the reaper. They shared a smoke in silence for a while before Christina couldn't take it any longer and spoke up.
'What's with the blood?' she said while blowing out the smoke. 'Does it have anything to do with Tig's busted face?' she asked.
'Yeah', Jackson answered to her in truth. 'I did that'.
'Why?'
'I can't tell you. I couldn't do it yesterday, can't do it now'.
'Why?'
'Because I don't want you to find out Chris. This could get you in danger, how much danger I don't even know. All I know is that it could change your vision and I don't want to be a part of doing that to you'.
'My vision on what, Jax?' she asked in a scared whisper. She recognized the look in his eyes. It was the same look he had after their father had died. He was resolute. About what? She didn't know.
Jackson blew out the smoke in his lungs before looking at his sister again, looking at her with respect and admiration she hadn't seen before. 'The vision on the life we both love so much'.
Before she could ask another word, Piney appeared behind them. Looking at his hands, both Tellers saw a thick, brown envelope. Without a hesitation, Piney handed it to Jackson before looking down at the both of them. 'Time for a change', he said in his warm, rough voice like he wanted to say they were the only once that could do it. He gave Jackson a squeeze in the shoulder and Christina a kiss on her head before walking away, leaving the both of them utterly confused. Jackson looked up at her before opening the envelope and finding a familiar set of yellow paper with known words on the front looking up at them.
'I thought you burned it?' she asked him a little scared. She hadn't read all the words her father had written but what she had, scared the hell out of her.
Jackson nodded. 'I did'.
Christina furrowed her eyebrows at her brother. 'Do you know what this means?' she asked next.
'I do. It's time for a change', he said before standing up from the gravestone and faced her. 'You with me on this, sis?'
Christina just smiled at him before kissing his busted cheek. 'You know I am. Always and forever, right?'
Jax nodded before looking at their brother's gravestone one last time. 'Always and forever', he whispered before walking away towards his father's grave, leaving Christina behind at Tommy's.
Christina had honestly no idea what was going on or where they were heading. But for once in her life, she felt at peace with it. She wasn't comfortable with not knowing but she was with Jackson, she trusted him. She knew right then and there her mother had been right. Once Jackson was at the head of the table, she would be right beside him to help him lead the club. Wherever he was going or whatever was going to happen, she would be there. It was where she belonged.
TADA! The end of season one! We'll continue with season two soon enough but first I want to know what you guys thought of this chapter and this season. What did you like and what didn't you like? What do you guys think about what Juice said to her? And what do you think Christina's problem is? How is she going to handle Donna's death? Will Jackson finally tell her? LOT'S OF THINGS TO FIND OUT IN THE NEXT SEASON! Next chapter: the start of season two, trouble is coming and Bobby's homecoming (and we know what that means right. But... is it Gemma that's gonna be raped or...?)