Chapter Fourteen.
When Tegan first opened her eyes the level of the light strips showed it was early morning. Most likely around 5 am. Sleepily she rolled over and pulled the blankets back over her head.
Someone bent down and kissed her hair. "Sleep well Commander," he whispered.
Tegan was already sleeping again. The weeks of cat naps catching up with her, along with past injures.
The next time she stirred it was late morning, so late it was almost lunch time! She stretched lazily and looked around herself still half asleep. The base was silent, everyone had already left. It felt great to laze in bed instead of rushing around.
Tegan felt wonderful after her rest, but quickly realised that the raid had gone ahead without her. Within seconds she was dressed and headed towards main area.
On the way she realised something else. The reason she'd been sleeping. The Doctor had hypnotised her. Even though he knew her feelings on the subject.
Tegan had been hypnotised before and taken over mentally at least twice. Ever since the second mental assault by the Mara, when the Doctor had used hypnotism to try and discover what was wrong. He'd ended up setting the Mara free to totally control her mind and body.
The Doctor had saved her and finally destroyed the Mara. But it had left her with a life long fear and hatred of having her mind touched by another. The jerk knew it!
"I'll kill him!" she vowed, heading straight back to her sleep area. Her weapon's chest flew open as she kicked at it. Tegan quickly strapped her small hand gun to her left hip and the large knife to her right, grabbed her back pack full of other nasty weapons and went in search of her enemy.
Seek, locate, exterminate. Ran through her mind. It was something she'd heard the Daleks say a million times. But even that didn't throw her mind from its task. She was deep in a homicidal rage. If something didn't happen to calm her soon, the Doctor wouldn't stand a chance!
Tegan could smell frying bacon and eggs. something he'd cooked often. She followed the heavenly scent to the tiny kitchen area, roped off from the right hand side of main area.
Sure enough the Time Lord was inside cooking. His back turned away from the door, unaware she was watching. The mere sight of him made Tegan even more angry. She crossed the room in three steps, drawing her gun silently.
As she brought the weapon up to head height, he saw her reflected in a cooking pot hanging on the wall.
"Morning Tegan, would you like some breakfast?" the Doctor asked cheerfully. He didn't move, he couldn't risk it. This was going to take a lot of fast talking, something he was quite good at after hundreds of years of practice.
She flipped off the safety catch, "Give me one good reason why I don't shoot you right now."
"Because I know you Tegan, and I know you are not a killer. You couldn't pull that trigger," he answered.
She raised the gun slightly and fired. The bullet hit the wall just inches from his head making him wince.
"I'm a soldier. I have killed millions of Daleks and hundreds of my own kind, too badly hurt to survive. I could kill you and never have any regrets. I'll give you one last chance to come up with a
good reason," she snapped.
"But you never killed one person in cold blood before Tegan, not simply out of hatred," he said softly.
"There is always a first time for everything!" she said coldly.
The Doctor raised his arms above his head and turned around to face her, slowly. "You couldn't murder a friend. Not just for the sake of killing. You are a good person," he whispered.
He was getting worried. He'd talked his way out of a lot of things, but nothing like this. Maybe he'd been wrong about her, maybe she had become hardened enough that she could kill him without any regrets.
The gun wavered for a few seconds before being lowered. "I was a good person. I'm not any more. Lost soul. Hopeless cause. Hardened soldier. Phrases that have all been used to describe me since I came to this stupid place," Tegan answered re-holstering the weapon.
"Did you sleep well?" the Doctor asked relaxing. Instantly regretting his choice of words as her face hardened again and a murderous gleam appeared in her eyes. The gun was trained on him again.
"Yes, and you know why!" she snapped.
"Me?" he asked innocently.
"Don't try that one!" she snapped.
"I'm not trying anything," the Doctor insisted.
"You hypnotised me, you bastard! You know I hate that! You know what the Mara did to me, how I suffered! How could you do this to me?" Tegan asked, her voice tight with emotion, hands shaking.
The Doctor took a deep breath. These next few moments were critical. They'd save his life.
Or end it. He had no idea if a Regeneration would work after his brains were blown out!
"It was for your own good. I had no other choice," he whispered.
"There is always a choice Doctor, you taught me that!" she growled.
"There are exceptions to every rule," he said softly, "I'm sorry."
"I trusted you Doctor. I've only trusted two people since Paul was murdered. Steve and you, how could you do this to me?" she insisted.
"I didn't want you to be hurt or killed because you were just too tired and distracted on a raid to notice every Dalek!" The Doctor said, "I care for you, Tegan. You are my friend and will always be
so, even if you can't see that through all your pain and hurt!" He took a step forward and held out his hand for the gun.
"I don't need you, I don't need anyone," Tegan hissed, firing again.
The bullet missed his hand by inches. The Doctor watched it hit the wall. "You know, for Commander of the resistance you are a remarkably bad shot!" he remarked.
Tegan lowered her weapon still angry. "If I wanted it to be that easy, then your smouldering corpse would have hit the floor, before you even knew I was awake!"
"What do you want?" he asked, "Hand to hand combat?"
"Scared?" she challenged, throwing away the hand weapon.
"Is this really necessary?" he asked, "Either shoot me or come and eat before this food becomes cold!"
"And forget what you did to me?" Tegan asked, "I guess you want me to leave with you right now. Forgive what you did. Forget what the Daleks did to me and all the other people on their prison ships?" she exclaimed.
"Could you?" the Doctor asked.
Tegan showed him her left forearm. There was an 'X' burned deep into her flesh. "They did this to me. Showed that I was an expendable slave. They could do what they wished with me!" Her anger starting to fade away as deeper wounds and long suppressed pain started to well up, deep inside of her.
The Doctor shook his head sadly, "That must have hurt. As I said before, I can only imagine what you went through," he said softly.
"That was a long time ago though. Breakfast?" he asked.
Tegan's anger took her over again, "Never mind your past Tegan, lets have breakfast?" she asked.
He backed away slowly, realising what a stupid comment that had been.
"I start to pour my heart out to you and tell you what happened in one of the most traumatic times of my life. Like you'd been insisting I should, and all you can say is that was a long time ago!" she exploded.
Her blade flew towards his face. He hadn't even seen her hand touch it. Managed to duck and avoid a nasty head wound.
Tegan swiftly knocked his legs out from under him. Leaving the Time Lord in an untidy heap on the floor. "I hate you!" she said with real venom, her finger pulling on the trigger of her gun.
The Doctor wondered dazedly when she'd picked it up again. Real fear showed on his face, surprising Tegan, he'd always been so good at masking his true feelings.
She closed her eyes and readied herself to fire.
"I'm sorry Tegan, sorry I brought you here. Sorry that I left you alone. And most of all sorry I couldn't stop you from becoming who you did," he whispered.
"Damn it!" Tegan swore, "You always have to have the last word!"
"Put that on my grave stone," he suggested, "Here lies a fool who always had to have the last word!"
She re-holstered the weapon. "You don't deserve death, no matter how strongly I want to give it to you," she said stepping away to allow him up.
"Thank you," the Doctor said dusting down his clothes.
"Get out of here before I change my mind," she whispered.
"If you just let me explain," he begged.
"I want you out of my base and off of my planet right now or I'll kill you!" she warned.
The Doctor fell silent.
Tegan pulled her knife out of the wall with difficulty and walked away. Not knowing or even caring where she was headed.
"No broken bones?" Turlough asked from the doorway, as soon as she was out of sight."How long have you been standing there?" the Doctor asked.
"Since Tegan started flattening you, I wasn't sure if I should interfere. You seemed to be doing okay on your own," Turlough answered.
"In the sense that Tegan nearly killed me!" he commented.
"I warned you the Commander would be out for blood," Turlough replied.
"Will you just call her by her correct name!" the Doctor snapped.
"I just did!" Turlough replied coldly.
"This is Tegan we are talking about. A frightened, tired and stressed Tegan, but still her. She needs help and as her friends we should be giving her that help! One stupid mistake and I lost all the ground I'd gained."
The Doctor brushed passed his companion, heading towards where Tegan had exited.
Turlough reached out and grabbed his arm. "Just remember Doctor, this isn't Tegan. This new woman is nothing like the Tegan Jovanka we knew, and she wouldn't suddenly and miraculously turn back into her simply because we've arrived in her time line!
"She has had years of torment and torture here, that changes a person far more than you think!"
"I assume there is a point in there somewhere." the Doctor snapped.
"My point being, this 'Commander' is dangerous. Her behaviour erratic, trigger happy, psychotic, sadistic and generally bad news to be around.
"If we stay here and interfere in her worlds petty feuds and battles, we are going to end up being killed. Probably by the Commander herself!" Turlough commented.
The Doctor sighed, his friend may be just thinking about his own self interest, but he did have a point. This wasn't Tegan anymore, but she might be again.
"Will I ever find out what is bothering her so deeply?" he muttered dishing up the rapidly cooling breakfast for them.
"I thought it was just the fact that Paul had been killed in front of her," his friend said.
The Doctor shook his head, "Its something to do with what happened to her while the Daleks kept her on a prison ship. She might have told me if I hadn't been such a fool!"
"Where has Tegan gone to?" Turlough asked.
"Into hiding I expect, we'll never find her until she wants to be found. There are miles of tunnels, only she knows them all. Maybe she has followed behind the raid party to join up with them. I have no idea, I don't know the ground well enough to attempt to follow," he whispered.
"Could the TARDIS track Tegan?" Turlough asked, "It knew enough to bring you here."
The Doctor looked startled, "That's right, how did we arrive here when I programmed co-ordinates for the other end of the universe!"
"What happened to not being able to visit, we might get pulled back into the same time stream?" Turlough asked, "We dived forward six years perfectly safely!"
"I have no idea," the Doctor admitted, "It shouldn't be possible, unless ..."
"Unless what?"
"Unless someone or something deliberately brought me here." he answered.
Steve walked passed the kitchen door head buried in attack plans and raid results.
"Lt. Brown, do you have any idea where Tegan might have gone?" Turlough asked.
He looked up, "You argued over the hypnotism thing?"
"She threatened me with a knife and gun. Nearly killed me," the Doctor answered.
"Try the gardens. She loves working there, but I suggest you send Turlough. From what she just told me I don't think you'll be welcome," he answered.
Both of them stared at Turlough.
"No, I told you before. I'm not getting in Tegan's way!" he insisted.
"I am not going to give you a choice," the Doctor snapped.