So, as some of you may be aware, I'm not currently writing for my Fairy Tail fanfic. Rest assure, I will still write this one because I'm still able to. If you read my message on my other story, you'll see why. Don't worry; I'll get myself back together in about a month or so.
At this point, I won't explain who the original characters belong to nor which ones are mine because I will start introducing quite a few from here on out. Now ENJOY!
So, I'm not one to judge when it comes to people's preferences, but when I first came into the Judgment Hall that day, I didn't expect to see this though. Hozuki-san, I have the utmost respect for you when it comes to a superior, but now, I had every right to look down at you as a person. The day I see you, waltzing with a HAREM of extremely well-dressed people, not just one, A HAREM of well-dressed geishas, was one I hoped to never see. Yet here we were.
"Minamoto-san, is there an issue you would like to bring up?" You put down your pen at that time to listen to me and yes, I had a very major issue to discuss with you.
"I'll be blunt, sir. Hozuki-san, exactly what possessed you to bring these people in here? Sir, have you been brainwashed to become like Hakutaku-san? I hope that this is only temporary." Clearly, I was not happy. I don't think most would blame me. It'd be one thing if he was socializing off of office premises, but he has a HAREM in the Judgment Hall. No offense, if I was being blunt. I tell you to imagine what I was staring at; think of Hozuki-san sitting in his wooden desk with glasses on, looking down at his paperwork with 30 expensively dressed geishas surrounding him. Yes, the several layered dragging kimono with long pinned up hair, makeup, painted fan, and gold colored obi strap. Yup, that fancy.
"Please refrain from making ridiculous comments in front of our guests. These MEN are testing out the recent makeup products and the skills of a passing artist that is being commissioned to do an artwork in the department. If anything, you should pity them." …No, I knew they were men. I never once said that they were women, but pray tell in an era where a man is considered unmanly, except in the cases of kabuki and other legit entertainment businesses, are there men wearing women's clothing and why they are here in the Judgment Hall where the souls are coming to receive their sentence. Please, Hozuki-san, have some sensitivity to the situation at hand. That and this is a governmental office. This was no place for testing of makeup.
"Sir, must this be done here though? The incoming dead are coming soon…"
"Ah, you don't have to worry about that right now. Enma-daiou is on a business trip, so all incoming dead are going to the other judges." … right we have 12 Kings of Hell. Makes me wonder at times why it seems that Enma-daiou is the only one so stressed with work. Then I remember: Hozuki-san is one of the harshest and most critical Chief of Staff that has ever existed in the history of Japanese hell. Is it a wonder? No.
"I see. However, there was no mention of it in the calendar. May I ask why the last minute meeting?" When things like this happen, there was bound to be something wrong.
"Ah, we have a business deal with another delegate from the Indian Hell. They wished to see Enma-daiou directly, but seeing that their delegate was injured and unable to move, Enma-daiou had to go instead." Though the sudden departure puts a little kink in the schedule, I can't say that it was not a bad idea; the office was now quieter, the workload decreased a bit on our side and we had one less thorn in our side. Well, can't say I was as pleased with the situation here either. No offense, those men were staring at Hozuki-san weirdly. I hoped that I was imagining it, but alas, I wasn't.
"Hozuki-san? Can I talk to you for a minute?" Testing the waters, testing the waters.
"Minamoto-san?" Yeah, I dragged him out of the office and pulled him to the side. I covered his mouth and then tilted my head in the direction of the 'ladies.' I kind of already figured that they would do something crazy, but… um… no offense, Hozuki-san's desk is not a podium to start dancing on like idiots. That and… I think I could avoid seeing the extreme fandom they had for Hozuki-san. Yeah, you could say it was kind of bad. And yes, I sighed. I think anyone in my position would.
"Hozuki-san, this is why we keep this out of the office. I know the Japanese hell is relatively new, but surely you must see the logic on this one." Yup, he understood. That's why he never allowed anyone else near him when he did his work unless they were delivering something, reporting an issue or anything work related. Yeah, even I didn't have that privilege at the time. He loosened up a bit, but he never left it in the hands of someone he didn't know again. Wise decision.
"Hozuki-san, I'll take care of this issue for right now. If you enter, this will just worsen. We'll have to file a report about why there are more holes in the Judgment Hall and pay back for the damage to the models and products. Let us avoid that, shall we? I'll be back in 30 minutes. Please tell the staff to leave a direct pathway open to the exit." Yeah, I decided to show to them how a real woman wears makeup. Back then, I had zero tolerance for that type of behavior. Well, still do in the workplace, but I respect their preferences at least.
I gathered about 10 other women in the department to help me out. Kasumi-san was more than willing to help and the kimono shop gladly rented me a decent formal kimono. The accessories… well, I can tell you one thing for sure, a lot of women are absolutely nuts when it comes to this sort of stuff. Even in hell, this has not changed. If you ask me what to wear, I'll give you a decent idea since kimonos and accessories go hand in hand, but these women will go out of their way to accent those pointers and make a woman stand out. Never fails. Well, it was an interesting experience, suffice it to say.
I move into the hallway with full blown makeup, accessories and long kimono. Now, I'm just stating what they said back them, but apparently, with make up on, I could pass as a high class consort. Well, I was flattered and all, but this kimono… was heavy. Hardly surprising since it was 7 layers of thick fabric, gold accessories and raised geta… People ask why women walk so slowly; this is a reason. Well, let me show you how a woman should act, GENTLEMEN.
"My, oh my. What a surprise. May I inquire as to why there is such a gathering in the Judgment Hall?" I raise my fan to the side, touching it to my lip as I watch the gentlemen gather around me.
"Ma'am, surely you can see we are here to entertain the gentleman who was sitting here. However, there has been a pest around him. Perhaps you would assist in our dilemma." In reality, they couldn't recognize me. Apparently, my eyes were softened a bit by the makeup and since my natural complexion was pale and I had naturally red lips, you could say that I appeared to be a completely different person with the pinned up hair style and the almost formal "elegant" tone. Don't ask me; I personally prefer the formal workplace tone, but for this type of thing, these tones are best.
"Hmm… may I request a description of the gentleman? Perhaps I glanced an image of him on my way here." Yeah, easing them in my net was child play.
"Hmm… he's a rather handsome gentleman. Slightly long ebony hair, dark night eyes like a demon's (I find this so amusing), an elegant figure (kind of creeping me out here….), and a simple black robe. Surely, you cannot miss him." Yeah, about those parentheses? My thoughts were about their comments. In all's honesty, I can see what they mean by that, but… that was and still is downright creepy. I was not surprised, just a little concerned.
"Hmm… Ah… that gentleman. If I recall correctly, he was going on an inspection with some of the other officials. Would you ladies kindly join me for some tea ceremony? Surely, we are all up to par and available for such a performance?" Oh, you can tell they were paling underneath all of the makeup. Really, this was hardly something worth the time, but considering that I got to de-stress from all the work in a non-violent way with permission from Hozuki-san and I didn't have to pay for anything, it wasn't such a bad idea.
Well, I'll leave it for you guys to imagine the details, but you could probably put the image out that they suffered quite a lot. If I'm going to compare what I did to them, imagine the most torturous idea possible and make that 100 times worse. Yeah, I think that was the minimum. I actually don't remember because someone decided to pull me to the side and make me drink sake with 88% alcohol content. You can guess who did that. Yeah, he was not happy to see me going all seductive. Apparently, his excuse later was that it was taking too long, but… I was in the office for 3 minutes and was leaving right then. I think we can figure out why.
Now, according to the report submitted by the other witnesses, I pounded into them the basics of tea ceremony. Yes, I knew how to prepare decent level tea because all girls relatively well-off were forced in to this tradition; I never hated it, but the blood always turned my feet into bee hives or at least they must have because the stinging feeling in my feet really wears me down. Anyhow, judging based on the remainders of what appeared to be ladles and boiling pots, you can roughly see that they either sucked and I decided to reprimand them or I just decided to stop the lesson and go physical.
When I returned to the office, makeup removed and in my normal clothes, I received another dilemma. The HakutakuxHozuki club decided to barge into the department and to make it worse, some of the female AND male staff joined in. The moe characteristic between Hakutaku-san and Hozuki-san was appealing in many ways and all, but… I couldn't really support a gathering like this in the middle of the office. I think that's understandable.
"May I ask what is the purpose and duration of this gathering?" I mean, no one was asking, so it was up to someone of at least my status to reprimand trespassers and dissidents.
"It's her." Oh, boy. You can already tell what this meant.
"GET THAT LADY!" … JUST MY LUCK. First, a harem of some clearly homosexual men and then, a riot of HakutakuxHozuki fans after my head. Truly, no rest for the wicked.
"… you know what? I really have no more patience as to communicate with the likes of you. Let's settle this outside of the office, shall we?" I pulled my wakizashi from my desk and moved towards the exit. Clearly not wanting to damage the office and due to my reputation, some of them backed off: specifically those in the office. The rest followed me into an open area next to the department, specifically for battles between people of various skills against the department. Seems fitting right?
"I have one question to offer to you though. Why is it that there is a price on my head, specifically from people such as you?" I mean, I had a right to know. They accused me of something and I didn't even know what was the supposed crime that I committed.
"Have you no shame? After what you have done to Hozuki-sama's relationship with Hakutaku-sama?!"… I had no idea what they were talking about. Their relationship was always the same; arguments over the most trivial of things, synchronizing their movements and behaviors at the exact times, always bringing up the most useless of insults. If there was something I missed, forgive me. I was not intentionally doing so.
"May I ask what has changed between them? As far as I know, they still act like two rival boys with ego." Hey, it wasn't a lie. They did and still do til this day. Even when Hakutaku-san got a… oh wait, can't tell you that one yet. That'll be quite the story for a later time.
"… are you blind? Have you not seen the love between those forbidden lovers?" …no. I didn't and I don't think I ever have. The image is both scary and tempting at the same time. Don't get me wrong; I could imagine a bond between them, but anything further than two men who can at least acknowledge their friendship, I might have a bloody nose on. I may not care for the coupling, but I have to admit, it would be interesting to watch.
"And how have I gotten in between them? If this is about my relationship with Hozuki-san, we both clarified that we did that out of a NEED to find the culprits disturbing the office." Some of them whispered in the back as if they didn't know. I honestly found that odd considering the reported that issue in front of a crowd of people… I guessed the gossipers were not spreading it as fast as I thought they would.
"Then why is this on Hozuki-san's desk?" And in that person's hand was a painting which featured a person who supposedly look similar to me, but… if you think of Japanese portraits, it's kind of hard to relate the actual person to the artwork at least for my case. Artwork is lovely, but I'm one to judge on what I see rather than an image. That why the invention of the camera was a big plus on my side when it first came into being.
"Ladies and gentleman, this is not me and this is not meant for Hozuki-san. I remember categorizing this. This was to be delivered to another staff member for documentation because it was passed from one of the high end nobles in Hell." Ah, right. We do have a nobility structure in Hell, but it;s fairly different from what you would think. It's not based on legacy; it's based on skill sets. Although we call these people nobility, they're just people who fit the role. They make policy decisions, but that is the job they choose. We fit the roles to the people who are power hungry in that sense. Their children are not bound or even asked to enter the same work domain as their parents to prevent power struggles. They can if they choose, but they often do not.
"Then why is it redirected here? Clearly, it is your face on that portrait." …Okay, why it looks like me is up to interpretation, but the reason it was directed here was to prevent scandals. Isn't it best to avoid those?
"We're just here to verify the requests from nobility here. We are not the ones who delegate the nobility system. I typically receive the documents, but since I was occupied with delivering documents to the other Kings of Hell, the request must have been sent to Hozuki-san. I assure you, having such a portrait is hardly worth the time and effort to make. Is Hozuki-san such an unreasonable man such that he would use the government's money for something like this?" Well, maybe for zoos or anything nature related, but a portrait and one with no model available? Not his cup of sake, I guarantee you.
"We don't believe you, ex-human." …You can imagine my reaction. It was already a year since I became a demon and certain demons still saw me as only a pain and a disgrace. It wasn't like there weren't others who were similar to me, but those were typically heroes or villains with some sort of fame like Oda Nobunaga-sama. Nobunaga-sama is actually working in the department as one of the top ambassadors with Europe's Hell. I had acknowledgement back when I was a human, but of course not to the extent of the others like Nobunaga-san. That's why I am special in a way.
"*sighs* All right. If you have any complaints to me, we can take this outside. Frankly, this is not worth the effort nor the time, but I doubt the people here will leave otherwise." Yup, you could say I was getting bored. Paperwork and the occasional scolding was fine and all, but… I guessed some fighting wouldn't be so bad. That and… well… I think I at least acknowledged that I was kind of lonely. Other than Kasumi-san and Okoh-san, few were my friends at that time. The rest, acquaintances, fans, and people who just plain hated me. Hozuki-san… well I guess you could say he is an exception, but… I think most would agree that he would be an exception no matter what the actual relation would be.
"Minamoto-san." Ah… he spoiled my fun there.
"Hozuki-san."
"May I ask what is the issue here?" I guess my holding of my wakizashi in broad daylight in the office would be kind of too conspicuous.
"Hozuki-san, if you will allow me 20 minutes, I shall report back to you about the situation accordingly. Please give me permission to do so."
"No." No, is it? Rather odd. Considering your nature, I'd think you'd welcome it. Well, then. Guess the dutiful puppy here will follow suit.
"Oh? Well, then, I presume that I should behave for my part and leave."
"Not yet, Minamoto-san. There is something I need to discuss with you. The rest of the scoundrels here, I simply will relay this message from my superior." …I doubt Enma-daiou would say anything about this.
"His own words. 'In any case, leave this sort of issue to Hozuki-san.' Since he did not specify which issue he referred to, I presume that it would be the one he discussed about at that time which was anything in regards to protesting." … I presume that he probably meant something else, but considering the situation, it was actually fine to leave to him. I could imagine that he was stressed out too. He handled most of the paperwork and the major issues with the incoming filing system, even with my advice.
What frustrates me the most is that I can't do anything more helpful for him. Even as an assistant, I'm doing basic tasks such as filing, data entry and errands. That proposal I gave to him before was the only one he accepted. I could understand if I was a newbie, but after a year, I'd think that it would be fair to say that I was frustrated. I already decided that I'd give up something else, so I at least wanted to be a reliable worker.
"Hozuki-sama! What is that thing to you!?" …thing? Well, I have to admit, I expected insults, but I didn't expect that sort of treatment here considering that most of the demons here had more diversity than most in the mortal world. You'd think there was no specific racial bias here. Or at least, I thought that should be the case. Hell always has some sort of new interest at hand.
"My assistant."
"Why her? Surely there were more capable candidates?!" Well, I asked that myself. But knowing Hozuki-san, he had his reasons. He wasn't so unreasonable as to not add on another worker who is incapable of handling the workload.
"None. All of them knew nothing of the mortal world and its ways. What I required of my assistant is not someone to help the paperwork, but to stand up to my opinions." …well, that explained why he insisted on keeping me regardless of the issues we had. Well, if anything, that was a nice touch to me.
"Surely, you don't need her for that though? Why her specifically?"
"Then if I chose O-koh-san, a male assistant or one of you to be my aide, would that change anything?" I guessed not... but judging by how the crowd stirred, I imagined that they didn't want that either. They were just complaining about Hozuki-san getting close to anyone else other than Hakutaku-san. Wouldn't have mattered who as long as it wasn't them. Selfish fools. On top of that… do they even have the guts to even try?
"Minamoto-san had not only the qualifications from her time when she was alive, but clearly knew what was missing from this department. The filing system she implemented and the advice she provided both are exceptional. Furthermore, could any of you foolish fanatics actually do what she does?" Well... I'd like to see them try.
"If you are willing to let us, then yes!" … oh this was fun. I took one afternoon to watch everyone just get murdered by Hozuki-san.
"Then, follow me. We shall test that for 3 hours. If someone is able to do it, they shall be an assistant alongside Minamoto-san. If not, you receive a punishment accordingly." You know something? I think those who bailed out right before Hozuki-san came were the luckiest and most cowardly bastards I ever met. They made their sentiments clear, but weren't willing to put the effort into the work At least those who went with Hozuki-san at least did that much.
Now my daily regiment. I forgot to tell you this, but really, if I look back to that, I guess I did more than I thought I did. My mornings typically consisted of inventorial assessments which required me to attend to all of the storages within the area. Since I clearly could not do that by myself, I trained staff members to do that in my stead and had them check at different times. If something clashed in the reports, I would check it out myself and correct the error or file a report, depending on who did the initial and final report. Furthermore, I kept every required item stocked in case of emergencies and hired various architects to expand the stock rooms, which helped a few staff members get some exercise that was needed.
The afternoons were filing paperwork from all of the departments and making sure that each one was done correctly. That means sorting through about 1,000 documents, one at a time. Now, there weren't computers to help sort them based on priority, so I read every one of them carefully and keep a list of which ones are for staff issues, replacement/repair, diplomacy problems, policy changes etc. If they are meant to be dealt with Hozuki-san, which general half of them are, I collect the documents and send them to his desk. The rest, I deliver them to the remaining departments to be implemented. So if you can imagine why I was always mad, I commend you. The rest who do not, let me elaborate. The departments are spread out such it requires at least an hour to do a full walk around. So, there's a reason why even after all this time, I am fairly strong and healthy for someone who maintains a clerical position.
Now, typically, most don't do that, but my policy is always doing what you can with your own power. As a manager, you can't be everywhere, so you teach people to do smaller jobs carefully and take care of the bigger decisions. Now I've done the first of those things, but the second is done by Hozuki-san. Although I understood clearly that I am an assistant, it made me very frustrated because I couldn't do my job the full extent that I thought I should. The advice that he says I give wasn't asked within the last 3 months before he said those words.
So, suffice it to say, I thought I was being treated in a biased manner, which I hate. Even so though, for this one time, I agreed to take the special treatment. Why? Well, to show those women exactly what was required of them to be Hozuki-san's assistant. I wasn't so cruel as to say that they should do all of what I did, but I did want them to understand that I was not letting my personal life into my work life. By the time the first hour was done, half of the women and men were slouching on the tables with their heads down, wishing that they bailed out when the rest of the cowards did. The next few hours were some of the most satisfying I've ever had.
So guys, I'll see you later!