The McCarthy Lies- Part 3

(Emmett POV)

There. I had said it. I had finally admitted to everyone that the first of the two people my bloodlust ran highest for was my own brother. My own twin, David. Even after what, seventy-four years, it still made me hate myself. How the hell had I let myself kill him? Everyone looked horrified at that, and Carlisle patted my shoulder supportively. The second person had been a total random, just some girl I had seen running down a street one night. She was not my very own brother, the brother who I had loved more than anything else ever in this entire crazy world. Wow, I was seriously messed up to have needed to kill David like that. Carlisle seriously should have killed me there too for that. But, unfortunately, Carlisle would never do that. No matter how much less I would have had to suffer knowing I killed him. I looked down at my hands. No one spoke at all and the silence was awful. I knew they all thought I was vile now. Who else kills their own brother?

"Someone who had no other choice," Edward said softly, "Someone who would have done anything else for it to have gone any other way."

I looked up at him. He looked like he was in serious pain, probably from assuming I had hated David.

"So really, your thoughts are the wrong way around," Edward said. What, Edward was vile? He was probably right. What the hell was wrong with me?

"Nothing at all," Edward said firmly.

"Right," I said wryly, "Nothing at all."

I looked at Esme, Jasper, Alice, and Rosalie. They were still trying to comprehend what I had done. It would take them a while. They had nothing to compare me killing David. Who else was that evil? Jasper looked at me finally, his face unreadable.

"So, you had a tough time as a newborn too," Jasper said, "I know how you feel, Emmett. You shouldn't feel guilty for every person you've killed."

"You know how I feel?" I said, shocked. How does Jasper know how I feel?

"Not exactly, but I've killed people I knew as well," Jasper said quietly, and I nodded. Yeah. I do not really think killing off his army was the same as your own flesh and blood. It just is not the same sort of thing. But, at least Jasper could have some sort of a grip on it. Rosalie, Alice and Esme just stared at the ground in shock. I felt like shaking them to see if they were still in there, or had mentally run away from me. I would mentally run away from me if I could, or just leave the memory and vampire parts of my mind somewhere else forever. Peace at last. Esme looked at me, her face pitiful to me. How could she pity me? Or did she just pity the David in my face?

"I think just you," Edward murmured. I sighed.

"Emmett, no one judges you," Jasper said softly. I sighed. Rosalie reached out her arm to touch me, and I jumped back. Didn't she know how awful I felt already? Rosalie looked hurt at that. We were soulmates after all, or at least I had always thought so. Were we really? I looked at Edward for help. He shook his head.

"You always were meant to be," he said. Right. A real match made in heaven. She fell in love with my brother, and accidentally saved me instead. I stood up sharply. This was too much.

"Emmett, don't," Edward said quietly. Too late, Edward. The damage has been done.

"What damage?" Edward asked. It is deep down, but there is a little done to everyone, I think. I walked over to the door.

"Thanks, everyone," I said, nodding, and ran from the house, as fast as my legs would carry me. No one followed.