Sometimes in life things turn out as you plan. Sometimes they don't. Randy was my best friend, then I had dreams of him that were far more. I always knew I would grow up and marry the man of my dreams, a man who would not care if age widened my hips and wrinkles marred my complexion. I always imagined I would live in the home of my dreams with two children, a boy and a girl and my parents would visit and spoil them. I envisioned barbecues and holidays with my perfect happy family, full of laughter. Who I was wouldn't be something I would be ashamed of any longer.
But life doesn't turn out as we plan. The surgery restored my sight. Not to its original state of course, but I don't complain about the glasses I have to wear at all times. My father let up slightly on his control and I don't hold grudges against him. After all, he did it out of love.
I'm a woman in my mid thirties now and I live in a beautiful home. One story with a decent sized fenced in yard for my two twin girls to play in. I still own the dog, Randy gave me. He's old and he can barely see himself now, so I am taking care of him like he once took care of me. I was married, but now I find myself sitting in the waiting room of the court house waiting for my divorce hearing. For a year I fought a man for custody of my children, but I know the home will be mine, for he has found a better home with the woman he left me for. I find myself wishing I had been more like her. Feminine and soft spoken. Understanding, never losing her temper or raising her voice, even when things are pretty bad. I watched her for some time after hearing the news. She's dainty and frail, nothing like the tomboy I have always been. Her hair is always perfect, every strand in place, her clothes wrinkle free and the nails on her tiny hands always perfectly manicured. Even as I wait for my name to be called, I have managed to spill my coffee on my simple dress.
And as I write this, I heard a voice behind me, and I turned and saw a familiar face standing behind me. Soft smile, boyish good looks slightly aged and I realize that he had been standing there the entire time, reading as I wrote about a time in my life that I loved and broke my heart at the same time.
"There's nothing about you I would change." He whispered and I stood and hugged my old friend. A friend I had not seen since I had woken up from surgery without foggy vision. I don't remember why I had cast him from my life once and for all. Maybe it was his lack of faith in the surgery that would restore my life. Perhaps I thought he should have been sure as I was. Part of me felt like he wanted me to stay dependent on people, hoping I would attach myself to him. Eventually, we would stop talking and our relationship faded into a memory. But now that he was again beside me, I realized that he was the only man who ever truly loved me and I would never let him go again.