Chapter 14) Severance
Kagome kept pace with the rest of her team until they went around the corner then she bolted a bit ahead of everyone so she could have peace and quiet away from the rest of them. She let out a sigh and took in the smell of the air content she could get away from the sights and smells of school for at least an hour a day.
She was so glad the coach let her in, he didn't at first but she sort of nagged him until he let her with no guarantees he would ever take her to competition. It was fine, she was ok with that she just needed the release that running gave her.
"Higurashi."
Kagome turned her head to the breathless voice calling out to her. Hojou was running full sprint to catch up to her. "Hojou-kun what are you doing out here?" She snapped at him.
"I joined track today."
Kagome's eyes narrowed and she looked forward in annoyance, "You could have just stuck a note in my locker if you wanted to talk to me."
"I have been!"
Oh…well Kikyou disposed of them for her that way she didn't have to do it and, it was the greatest excuse next to 'my dog ate it' and it gave Kikyou something to burn rather than smoking cigarettes.
"I know you're mad at me."
"I'm not mad at you."
He blinked, "You're not?"
"Hojou I really don't want to talk to you right now. I'm not mad at you but I just don't want to talk." Kagome sped up a bit and kept that pace for awhile. After a few minutes she could hear Hojou strain to keep up before slowing down considerably. When she was halfway across the field she saw him stop and lean down resting his hands on his knees wheezing heavily.
She let out an aggravated sigh. Kagome picked up her pace and eventually circled around to where she was behind him. She stopped and stood in front of him. "Walk it off Naibu."
"I… can't." He coughed a few times before saying, "black spots."
Kagome took his hand and wrapped it over her shoulder as she put her hand around his waist and after coach saw him and shook his head she took him straight to the nurse.
"Hojou-kun you hang on we're almost there." When she felt his weight suddenly shift on top of her she rolled her eyes and leaned to the side to support him fully. "Don't you dare pass out on me!" When he said nothing nor stirred she let closed her eyes in annoyance. Looking around she made sure they were alone in the hallway before hoisting him on her back carrying him.
The nurse looked up and stared, "Did you carry him all the way dear?"
Kagome blanched, "Uh… he just fainted and he's really heavy." She feigned wobbling and with the nurses 'help' laid him on the cot.
Kagome sat beside him the bed in a small chair. She folded her legs and let out a sigh looking down at Hojou. She remembered when they were in grade school she thought he was the prettiest boy in class. She had a huge crush on him through junior high… the day before she turned 15 everything changed.
Perhaps she fell for Inuyasha because he was her knight in shining armor… over and over again. There were so many times he had saved her life, so many times she had thought whenever he stole a glance at her that he was seeing her, not Kikyou. Loving someone at 15 years was difficult both of them were so immature in so many ways.
Beyond Inuyasha there was Kouga, although she thought of him as a friend the southern wolf pack clan leader made his sentiments vocally clear to her. Then there was the warlord Nugamo whom was awfully cute and even Hojou's great great great grandfather to boot! And all this attention when she wasn't even remotely interested in finding a boyfriend!
No, after being serenaded by both demon's and human prince's alike Hojou's chances grew slimmer and slimmer. She wasn't being a snob Kagome was just tired of fake promises and pretty words and Kouga proclaiming her 'his woman' all over feudal Japan then coming home to Hojou trying to stake claim by serenading her with gifts. It wasn't like she didn't know his intentions, her friends made doubly certain.
Kagome always wanted a normal life and possibly a normal boyfriend, now that she was a demon she envied her past life and the freedoms it came with. Could she learn to live a normal life again?
What about liking someone again? She wasn't saying love… love was something for people who weren't broken like she was… just to like someone… maybe even have a chance at normality.
She reached up and with the back of her long claw pushed back his light brown hair from his forehead. What about Hojou? She mentally sighed, no not like Hojou. She didn't know what she wanted anymore, maybe he was perfect for her at one point in her life but now… as a demon? No. When he started to stir she took her hand away from his forehead and sat back down on the chair. Maybe… maybe she should leave.
Hojou opened his eyes looking up to the white ceiling. Wasn't he in gym running around the track after Kagome?
Kagome stood up to leave but he saw her.
"No wait!" Hojou reached out and took her hand.
Kagome stilled when he grabbed her hand like that. After the shock wore off something else settled in its place… something much darker. It started with a shiver up her spine and triggered a blind rage.
"Please don't go. Let me say a few things, you can go and think about it. Hate me forever if you want but just let me explain."
Kagome couldn't go she was rooted to the spot. She began to see spots herself, spots that lost their color. She balled her hands into fists digging into her skin.
Hojou saw her stiffen and he let go of her hand, "We didn't know what happened to you. No one knew, your family didn't say anything. I thought… something bad happened to you."
Her lips pulled back into a vicious snarl. Kagome wanted to reach up and slap her hands over her mouth wondering why or how she could do something like that.
"I've always liked you Kagome, I told you I would wait for you. I guess in our grief we sort of got together, me and Eri. That was wrong. I know after you came back you've got post trauma after what you've been through, you're different now and I can be ok with all of that if you give me the chance."
Gritting her teeth as hard as she could she shook hard and eventually let out a sigh when the feeling just washed over her. She felt tired and weak. Kagome pulled a chair to her and sat down on the spot. She reached up and dragged her talons through her hair before looking up at Hojou. He said a few things just now didn't he? She thought for a moment and just shrugged it off as not important it probably had to do with why he went out with Eri or something. "Hojou I have to tell you something."
"What is it?"
"I tried to tell you a few times but you must have really blindly liked me not to really listen to what I was saying." She eyed his soft brown eyes that held nothing but confusion. "His name was Inuyasha, and I was with him for a few years."
Hojou blinked, "Years?"
Kagome nodded, "Although Inuyasha would never admit to it, we were steady."
"You were seeing someone?"
"Sort of."
"What do you mean 'sort of'?"
"Because we were together but he'd never had the balls to admit we were a couple." Kagome almost smiled at his wide eyes at her statement. She really did grow up being rather loose lipped after Inuyasha.
His eyebrows furrowed and he said nothing for a few minutes trying to digest this all in, "Why didn't you ever tell me?" he finally whispered.
"Because there was no 'us' if you liked me you never told me. You assumed I knew but I didn't, I thought you were being overly nice because you were my friend since grade school and I was always sick."
"But I would always ask you out on dates!" He said on his behalf.
"But it never went further than that Hojou. You assumed we were a couple after one date then started saying the oddest things to me like 'if you need time I'll wait.' I didn't understand what you were trying to tell me I was sick all the time." She let out a sigh narrowing her eyes slightly pulling out her wild card. "Plus I wasn't the only girl you ever went out with… remember that 7th grader?"
Hojou's eyes widened and he put up both hands defensively, "There was nothing between me and Suki we just went out to the movies twice."
"And we went to the ice cream store once."
He closed his mouth.
Checkmate.
"You know I'm really surprised Eri didn't tell you about him. I thought she'd spill it all to someone to get back at me."
"Well… she sort of did. That's why we broke up. I thought she was lying about you."
"She may have stretched the truth because she's mad at me but basically she wasn't lying."
Hojou's face became pensive after a moment he whispered, "Where is this Inuyasha now?"
Kagome stared at him for a moment. Something must have passed through her expression that caused Hojou to recoil lightly. She whipped her head to the side and looked out the window. She closed her eyes whispering softly, "He's not around anymore." A slight 'oh' is all she heard and then he said nothing more on the subject. She kept her eyes closed until she was sure she could open them without tears falling. Kagome stood up and walked out pausing at the doorframe looking over her shoulder at the sorrowful expression on Hojou's face, "I'm sorry." She whispered softly before walking out of the infirmary.
She wasn't sad she confessed her relationship with Inuyasha to Hojou, it just felt as though she severed one of the last remaining connections to her former humanity. "Perhaps this is for the best," she thought as she squared her shoulders and walked down the hall balling her hands into fists almost drawing blood with her talons poking her palms. It just wasn't fair, it never was.
'Hate him…'
That little voice nagged her yet again. Every time she was on the verge of tears over his betrayal that small voice would just … say that.
'Hate him…'
That was the ultimate severance… the singular part of her that stubbornly refused to accept her demonic nature fully. It wasn't that she was still in love with Inuyasha it was the fact she didn't want to hate him. What would happen to her if she lost that last shred of humanity? The human she was stood for courage, love, compassion, understanding and friendship. If she turned away from that would the demon become that which her dreams portrayed? She stopped and turned her head to look into a window looking at her pale reflection with ice colored eyes. Even though the exterior was a demon, her heart was still human.
So hate him? No, she allowed herself to be mad at Inuyasha… but not hate.
"You seem pissed."
"I don't hate him!" Hours later with those thoughts still on her mind she barked at Kikyou during lunch and turned back to the unopened paper bag during lunch and glared at it. Every now and then the smell of burned meat or something really disgusting caught her and she would wrinkle her nose. Cafeteria food was just not food but mystery meat found in traps at the side of the road.
Kikyou stared at Kagome's rather loud outburst then stared at her own unopened paper bag as well. She didn't know who Kagome was talking about hating, maybe it was that Hojou kid that wouldn't take no for an answer. Kagome only had to give her the okay and she'd bust his knee caps in. Kagome had been staring at her lunch bag since she got to the lunch room and Kikyou proceeded to stare at her lunch bag as well. In the corner of her eye she saw Kagome sneering at her own lunch and Kikyou sneered at her lunch as well. She was almost positive it was tuna, it was always tuna, it will always be tuna.
The great Aunt Kira was an extremely old woman with about a zillion cats that appointed Miss Kira as queen of the apartment. Miss Kira rarely left her flowered recliner throne for anything aside from going to get her hair done although Kikyou started to think that Miss Kira was permanently attached to it. Her subjects would roll around on the ground and Kikyou was appointed housekeeper to the royal court and feeder of the sacred cats and royal scooper of the litter. For her services she shared the table scraps of the cats put into bread and packaged in these brown sacs. The cats did not show their appreciation to her, they pooped around the house and they stole her bed. She was forced to sleep in the cat basket next to the dryer which none of the cats ever used. But, in retrospect it was a good life. Miss Kira was very nice and always baked sweets, sometimes she would pinch her cheeks really hard but she was okay with that.
Still… it was ALWAYS TUNA! "I hate tuna." She muttered.
"It's not tuna." Kagome folded her arms on the table and resting her forehead on them. "It's pastrami."
"No cat food today!" Kikyou tore into the bag and ate her sandwich.
Kagome looked up and noticed everyone around them was staring she just shrugged and put her forehead down on her arms again. She was tired actually, not mentally plain out physically. It felt good to be tired it meant she was vulnerable and human. Maybe when she got home she'd actually take a nap, even better she would actually sleep through the night. She smiled excited for the upcoming rest. After dropping Kikyou off at her apartment after school she yawned happily ready to hit the sack.
Kagome walked up the long set of stairs to the shrine house until a loud noise scared her and instantly Kagome leapt backwards flying into the branches of a tall tree. Her heart raced as she looked down seeing her little brother with a foghorn in hand, "SOUTA CUT THAT OUT!"
Souta had been hiding in the bushes for a looooong time waiting for Kagome to come home. He had been smart enough to rub up against a bunch of stuff so she couldn't figure out where he was by using her nose. All she knew is that he was there, not that he still was there. This time he got her good.
He saw it on a movie, attack of the killer wolf or something like that. They killed the wolf person by him. Hiding the foghorn behind his back away from Kagome's all seeing eyes he smiled sheepishly, "Good one my padawan learner."
"Padawhat?" Kagome growled as she lunged at him grabbing him by the ankle raising him into the air upside down.
"This was for your training!"
"Training my butt." Kagome raised him higher so she could glare at him eye to eye, "Souta what if I became so scared I reverted into something well… not me?" She didn't know how to explain the darkness that loomed over her at all times. It frightened her of what she could be, the damage she would do if she ever gave into it.
Souta put his finger to his lips, "You mean that turkey dinner a few months ago?"
Kagome glared at him as she opened her hand letting him fall on the grass before stomping away back rigid and hands balled into fists. "Never bring that up again!" Dinner already was a waking nightmare without bringing back the worst of it.
"Okay… sheesh." Souta stood up brushing his pants from the grass finding out that he had grass stains on his new jeans… crap he was going to have to tell his mother. Then she'd find out what he did to piss off his sister then she'd get mad at him for that.
No way, he was going to have to wash his own pants tonight.
Kagome walked into the house and was immediately assaulted by her grandfather's scream.
"HEY SOUTA IS KAGOME BACK YET?"
Kagome's ears were already throbbing in pain because of Souta's little trick. She closed her eyes in irritation as her grandfather spotted her in the living room.
"Kagome you're here." He blinked. 'Must be those demon reflexes.'
Kagome wanted to growl but instead she smiled ear to ear blinking her frustration out. "Yes?" She said in her sweetest voice as she dropped her pack on the ground.
"I went over to my supplier today and found you this." He reached into his haori pulling something out.
"Gee gramps… a water kappa foot again?" Kagome folded her arms waiting to see what he got her. She got to a point where she was mildly curious as to what he could find. Her grandfather made it an art form to bring home stuff no one had ever heard about. When he pulled out a clear teardrop shaped crystal attached to a leather cord her eyebrows furrowed. That looked normal enough, even pretty.
He ran his fingers over the smooth surface of the crystal. "This, my dear is one of the very rocks belonging to a demon mountain. The crystal is part of its body infused with its youki." He put the crystal in her hand and curled her fingers around it seeing her surprised look he added, "I didn't believe the story either but it was pretty enough… a demon mountain how absurd."
"Demon mountain?" She whispered holding the crystal up to eye level. "Fuyouheki." She whispered remembering the name of the mountain demon that wanted nothing more to rest. It was killed by Naraku in the end. This crystal… could it really be the Fuyouheki, the same one that erased a demon's aura?
"That wasn't what I was going to show you." He whipped around despite his age grabbing a rather large book from his recliner. It was a very large old weathered book with dust over the cover. He blew on it to get some of the dust off and Kagome started coughing as the dust hit her nose. "I read it in here somewhere…"
He sifted through the brittle pages which were stuck together before stopping at a page and flipping the book her way shoving it in her face. She took a step back and stared at the squiggly drawing. "Um… what am I looking at?"
"This is an ancient Buddhist text I found at my supplier it is a training manual for casting holy aura to seal a demon and purification."
A growl found its way to her throat as she took another step back away from the text, "You want to do what?" She knew what the hell she was now but other than wishing again on the tama she was damned sure that sealing and purifying wouldn't turn her human.
He was blissfully unaware at how close he was to seeing the end of his old age. "There's purification on many things; trees, water, and air." He held up an ofuda with a badly scribbled purification charm. "I don't know if they work, but I will try!" With that he slammed the book shut throwing more dust in the air and in her nose and skipping into his room slamming the door shut so he could have peace and quiet as he tried to figure out how to work these things.
Kagome on the other hand, after she was done sneezing, was just standing there in awe at what just happened. She didn't have to worry that he could seal her, none of the charms he made seem to work.
But this… she looked down at the crystal… if this really was the Fuyouheki she could use this. She stuffed it into her pocket wondering how she could test something like this out without another demon or legitimate holy man to sense your presence.
"Hello there Kagome." Mrs. Higurashi walked into the living room wiping her hands on her apron, "How was school today?"
Yes school… "School sucks."
"You can do it." Mrs. Higurashi patted her on the shoulder. "It's only a few more weeks."
"Yea a few more weeks." Kagome dragged her pack up the stairs not bothering to pick it up. Her mother was just way too optimistic. There were some people that were just too happy every morning whenever they woke up. Her mom was like that all day long. She walked into her room letting go of the strap of her pack and tossing it to the ground.
"HEY KAGOME!"
Kagome winced at her brother's scream from downstairs. Didn't anyone in this household talk normally? He could have whispered it and she would have heard him with her door closed. She plopped down on her bed face first covering her head with her pillow.
Her head turned to the side peeking out from under the confines of the pillow as she looked at her brother's doe colored eyes, "Souta I'm tired." Kagome muttered covering her head with the pillow once more.
"Yea right you're a demon you're not tired." Souta put his fists on his hips, "I know you aren't really that tired."
"I haven't slept for a week, okay?" Kagome raised the pillow to glare at him before she covered her face back up.
"Aw come on Kagome and I wanted to show you all these cool new moves." When nothing is going your way, whine. "Please, just a half hour!" When she didn't budge he begged again, "Ten minutes tops!"
"Fine!" Kagome closed her eyes before flinging the pillow off her face, so much for taking a nap! "Out of my room while I change." She ordered the boy.
Souta smiled big time knowing he had just won. Kagome knew he wouldn't stop until she did what he wanted. Too bad he didn't have one of those subduing necklaces that she had around Inuyasha. Maybe he'd ask his grandfather if he could find one from his 'supplier.'
After she changed into a pair of loose grey cotton pants that tied around the waist and a tight black tank top Kagome walked down the stairs stretching her arms over her head sniffing the air. They had steak before she got home it seemed. She let out a sigh pulling all her hair up in a high ponytail, life was just not fair.
She snuck into the kitchen before skewering an apple with her claws devouring the whole thing in like three bites before tossing the core into the garbage. Kagome shivered as she walked out into the cold night air, her bare feet making light tapping noises on the ground before she walked into the large emperor style shrine.
With the tall ceilings and empty area it was a great place to train. Kagome stood in the middle of her room folding her arms glaring at her little brother who had a wicked little smile on his face standing beside a pile of bricks. "You're up to something."
"Who, me?" He pointed at himself with a thumb.
"No I was talking about Buddha. Yes you." Kagome rolled her eyes before she began to stretch her body gracefully. To be honest she didn't really need to do all this 'training' but it was the few times she spent with Souta. She watched as he sat down on the ground cross legged nodding for her to go on.
Souta was heading into thirteen years old. Kagome didn't have to second guess who he was trying to be when he grew up. He said 'feh' a lot, wore red constantly, he was growing out his hair and taking practice sword training at the youth center. Soon the boy was going to start swearing soon.
Yeah right, not with her mother around. Her mom had set up one of those swear jars about a week ago and it was half full already. Poor Souta… literally poor.
Kagome was glad that Souta never asked about Inuyasha anymore. After she came back as a demon she could hear him whisper Inuyasha's name to her mom in hushed questions, then those stopped altogether and Souta never actually said his name anymore. Kagome never told Souta what happened but it wasn't as though he couldn't have guessed why she had been crying for weeks on end. And even though he committed the ultimate act of atrocity towards her Kagome never spoke ill of him. She didn't want to tarnish Souta's admiration for the hanyou, after all Inuaysha never did anything to hurt her little brother. She just wished Inuaysha would have thought about all the people he had affected with his actions. She swore he had ADD or something, look before he leapt, socially inept… yea maybe she should take psychology.
"You're zoned out again!"
She rolled her eyes at her little brother before raising her arms and doing a gracefully slow back flip. A pile of bricks were stacked neatly across from her and she ran fast and with her right hand she chopped into the middle of the brick.
There was clearly the sound of a crack.
But the brick didn't break.
"OWWWW!" She grabbed her sore hand and began to dance wildly in pain.
Souta slapped his forehead hard. "Not a karate chop, with your fist."
Kagome shook her hand, "I dare you to try it!"
"You're the demon!" He growled back.
"UGH you're so annoying!"
"Hey, you're bleeding." Souta ran to his sister's side and looked at the deep cut.
"Where did you get this sort of training might I add?" Kagome had always been wondering what the devil her little brother was trying to make her do.
"I saw it in some video I rented. Hey that looks deep." Souta watched as the pitch black blood dripped from a cut on the side of her palm, "You might have to go to the hospital and get some stitches…"
"No way!" Kagome nervously cried out, "Absolutely not! I don't want to live my life in some zoo."
Souta hadn't finished his sentence from before because he was staring at the skin seal on its own right in front of his eyes. The pale skin sealed up until there was nothing but a faint scar then it slowly started to disappear away. "What just happened?" He looked up at his sister who looked kind of zoned, the pupils of her eyes were enlarged and she was staring quietly at the cut of her hand blankly. "Kagome?" He whispered wondering what was wrong with her. She just stared at her hand, a swirl of cold swept between them and a sort of foreboding feeling rushed through him and he was suddenly scared, "Kagome!" He shook her hard and she started blinking.
Kagome blinked and stared at her little brother, "What's wrong?" He looked positively frightened. "I'm alright Souta. See, I'm a fast healer."
Souta knew that she was not 'there' for a second he could see it in her eyes. He had no idea what happened when she wasn't completely here with him consciously but whatever it was scared the living shit out of him. "Why is it so black?" He whispered watching her wipe the bit of blood of her hand with the edge of her shirt. It wasn't the red of a regular human's blood, this was so dark red it was black.
"I dunno. I'm learning as much as you are you know?"
"Nee-chan?"
"Hm?"
"Are there really such things as vampires and werewolves?"
"Yes there are. Bat demons and wolf demons."
"Oh." Now Souta looked over his shoulder, "There any here?"
"Souta!" Kagome grabbed his hand and led him back to the house. "There isn't anything out there like that." At least… she hoped there wasn't. But she wasn't about to entertain his more imaginative nature. She could sense demonic auras so she figured she'd be able to sense another demon.
"Then you killed them with stakes and stuff." Souta looked up at her.
Kagome shook her head, "I used my arrows to purify them. Souta you watch way too many monster movies."
Souta had never really talked about demons and stuff with his sister, but it was pretty dumb considering that she walked among them and fought with the and against them. Then there was something he remembered in a vampire move, "Hey nee-chan?"
"What?" Kagome was dreading another demon fairytale that he wanted her to answer.
"How long do demons live?"
"Depends on the definition of 'demon.' Sango told me a little so I don't know. There are lesser demons like animals, plants, objects and even demons formed by strong emotions. Sango says there are lesser demons like small creatures that were possessed by unnatural forces or born during blood moons, demons that can't take forms possess a person's or objects body or take their life force from others to sustain themselves."
"Sustains themselves by eating humans?"
"Some do. They suck the soul from your body. We came across a frog demon that was over a thousand years old by just taking the souls of young girls. Even Kouga-kun's wolves at human flesh, that is before I met him."
"So I am food?" He inched away from his sister.
"Souta I'm not going to eat you." She rolled her eyes. Really he was a wimp. She sat down on a stone bench and folded her arms.
"What other type of youkai are there?"
"I saw a cave demon that devoured the power from priestesses. There were monsters like what you see in the movies that breathed fire but those are lesser beasts. Sango once told me the most fearsome type of demon masquerade themselves in human form, like…" She stared down at her little brother realizing that she never really told him much about Sesshoumaru or a few others she met along the way.
"Like you?" Souta stared at her with critical eyes, "What kind of demon are you?"
"I… I don't know Souta. I was human, then the wish on the shikkon turned me into this but I don't know what 'this' is."
Souta made an 'oh' sound before looking down to her perfect skin, "What about a taiyoukai, a higher demon like you? How long would you live?"
Kagome blinked. 'What about a taiyoukai like you?' She never once thought in her life she would hear that question aimed her way. "Sango told me the story that greater demons were completely unlike lesser youkai. They are direct descendants of the first demon the god and mother of Japan created. They are huge rare beasts that have great power. Even rarer are titanyoukai like Inuyasha's father who was a monstrous in true form. There are a few of those I've met that I guess don't want to take human form or they can't, I don't know. I guess that's reserved for stronger minded youkai that have complete control of their bodies."Kagome tapped her chin wondering about what category she'd fall into. Did that mean she had a different form because demons were not naturally human like in shape or was there such a thing as a human youkai?
A huge cat.
Yeah, Kagome could secretly be leader of the cats.
Sure thing… she inwardly rolled her eyes as she leaned backwards looking up into the night sky. "I guess it all depends on if they can keep and maintain that control. I've seen a taiyoukai go feral and give into his blood rendering him no greater than the lesser youkai. Fighting instinct is something that is not just hard, it's impossible. And feral means you fight a lot until you're either killed or eventually taken over by the bloodlust inside like a berserker." Kagome had seen Inuyasha loose it into his true blood before. It was a sight that sometimes gave her nightmares. He had a sword custom built so he wouldn't fall into his darker instincts. "So, a taiyoukai that has complete control of their body and instinct live…"
Souta noticed that her eyes widened and didn't finish her sentence. "What?"
"...they're immortal…"
Souta stared at her for a moment before something of a realization of what she just said hit him and then he whispered 'oh' softly before going very quiet.
Although she was exhausted her mind kept wandering to her earlier conversation with Souta under the god tree.
She just couldn't get it out of her mind and it was robbing her of any sleep.
She folded her arms looking out of the window pensively at the city lights beyond the trees. "Forever." She whispered softly at no one putting a hand to her lips to chew on a talon. It was a nervous habit she had picked up. She heard the sound of tapping downstairs and realized someone was awake. Wrapping a robe around her she walked out of the bedroom. Instantly a night light flickered on and she winced as it blinded her momentarily. She used her foot to kick it out of the socket blinking a bit to get back adjusted to the greenish haze that allowed her to see in the dark. Kagome leaned into Souta's room and saw him lying face down on the covers that he had kicked off in the night his arms were hanging off the edge of the bed. He snorted and flipped over before beginning to snore loudly.
Rolling her eyes she shut his door muttering, "little brothers" before walking down the stairs towards the light in the kitchen and the light tapping sound that caught her ears upstairs. The closer she got to the light the more her eyes adjusted. Kagome peeked in and saw her mother in a robe and slippers at the table that was covered with a few letters with calculator in hand.
Kagome stood for a moment looking in taking her mother's soft scent of lilacs and a few other things she didn't know too well enough to identify. The elder woman's hair was tussled as though she had been sleeping before she came down to do some accounting. She had a slight smile to her face even though it looked as though she was going over bills. But that was just her mother, smiling at everything even though other's would get stressed over it. "Mama?" Kagome whispered softly as not to startle her.
Akiko heard her daughter whisper and she turned her head to the side to see Kagome standing there leaning against the doorframe. "Kagome, what are you doing awake?"
"I don't sleep a lot mom you know that."
"Well you should try."
Kagome walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table beside her mom looking at some of the bills her mom was going over. "Whatcha' doing?" She watched her mom go back to shuffling a few letters here and there.
"I finally got an estimate from the photographer for the new family photo. We'll have to cut a few things back in order to afford it but we can do it."
"This is really important to you isn't it?" For the past couple months her mother had been not too subtly hinting about getting another photo taken. Kagome had never really thought about the financial status of her family situation before. When she was little she thought a hundred yen made her the richest person in the countryside, when she was older she was busy struggling between two eras where you'd be considered a lord with that same hundred yen. Perhaps she could help around the house Kagome figured she was being a burden to her family. They had to switch to all natural cleaners which weren't cheap, buy more food for her and even change their entire life because of her. She felt as though she owed her family that much for being such a bother. "Mom I can take a part time job if you want."
Akiko slammed her hand on the table actually catching her daughter off guard, "You have to focus on your studies Kagome. We'll make it through we always have." With that she closed the discussion by standing up and walking out of the kitchen.
Kagome blinked never once seeing her mom annoyed with anything in her entire life.
She knew that the family did not have to pay to live here as the Higurashi clan had been custodians of this shrine for over five generations but they still had to live and eat. Kagome didn't always live here, her mother grew up here but when she married her father they had lived in Kyoto. After her father died they moved in with her grandfather at the shrine and Kagome had pretty much been raised here.
Kagome folded her arms on the table and leaned down resting her chin on her arms staring off into the sea of bills recalling today's earlier conversation with Souta. There was a natural order to things, a cycle of life and death. Kagome was not out of that cycle and would be forced to sit back and watch those she loved grow old and die generation after generation. She wouldn't have the luxury of being pinned to the god tree sleeping for fifty years… she would be awake to see it all while staying exactly as she was for now… for a very long time.
Her lips went into a thin line a look of deep concentration marred her pretty features. They didn't have to live like this, from paycheck to paycheck. She would have to sacrifice some time from her family but her mother was completely right, the best thing she could do for them was to go to school and get a good career and take care of her family. Yes, that is what she was going to do.
I will take care of them, all of them.