Chapter 14

'How the hell could this happen?' Simüte stared at her in horror.

'How do you think?'

'You… you're a married woman Lilly.' He turned away from her. 'This is not how married women are supposed to behave. On top of that you're a queen, you should have known better.'

'Believe me Simüte you don't need to tell me that.'

'How far on are you?'

'About six months.'

'Sixth months? Six months and you never thought to tell me?'

'I'm sorry Simüte, but you know how it's been.'

'And you're sure are you, sure that it's not…' Simüte didn't know how to finish his sentence.

'It's Yoam's baby Simüte. Kindred and I... we've not... not since Tamilin was born.'

'Does he know? Does Yoam know?'

She shook her head.

'You have to tell him Lilly.'

'I will, I promise, just don't…'

'Don't what?'

'Promise you won't tell him for me.'

'Oh great Lilly, just great, you know even if I don't promise you I won't be able to say anything now you've asked. Damn Lutoni loyalty; what am I suppose to do every time I see him until you do tell him? Do you want me to lie right to his face? For the love of Ni, Lilly the man's due back any second.'

'Don't you think I know that? Don't you think this is hard for me?'

'Oh I know exactly what I think this is for you,' Simüte glared at her. 'This is what it always is for you.'

'Please Simüte, what can I do to make this right between us?'

'Tell me what your moment of clarity was.'

'What?'

'I don't want to wait for Yoam; I want to know what it is now. I'd say it was a fair price for keeping your secret Lilly.'

'Okay,' she lowered her head. 'In my moment of clarity I saw the Silkoniousmacarmakayeon name disappearing in the sands of time. I saw the people of both my kind and the Odraian kind hiding amongst the Standing, blending like one. The sand continued to fall and history became forgotten. Then I saw the Khined descendents of both my council and me.'

'Do you know what it means?'

'It means it's my destiny to hide my people from the world.'

'Of course it does,' Simüte stared up at the ceiling and shook his head. 'Why would it mean anything else? Of course you do know the only spell powerful enough to do that requires the ultimate sacrifice, right?'

'I know.'

'Well you definitely can't do that whilst you're pregnant Lilly, I won't let you kill an innocent life.'

'But I've been putting this off for long enough Simüte; my entire reign has been leading towards my sacrifice. Once we tell Yoam what must be done…'

'Don't be any more of a fool than you already are Lilly, you know he will not willingly agree to let you do this.'

'But you will?'

'The moment of clarity is an Ashmar's most sacred birth right; if this is what yours is leading you to do then I must respect that. But I will not let you do it whilst an innocent child still lives within your womb.' Simüte found himself pacing. 'We must delay the inevitable so when Yoam comes I want you to tell him your vision exactly as you have told me, but I want you to say you do not know what it means. That at least should buy us some time.'

'And what are you planning to do with that time Simüte? Sooner or later he'll need to know what's going on.'

'I know, that's why I hadn't finished talking yet,' he ran his fingers back through his hair. 'In about a week I'll take Yoam with me to Sil, but not just anywhere, to the place where all our people keep disappearing; at least then I know we won't be interrupted.'

'That's taking a big risk Simüte.'

'Don't you think I know that?' He turned. 'As I was saying, I'll take him there and act like I know what you vision means, but am too afraid of going against tradition to tell you. If I know him the way I think I do, he'll try to get me to tell you. I'll end the meeting agreeing that I will think about it. Soon after, whether it be a week or a day, you must go to him and tell him about the child.' He sighed and turned his gaze back towards her. 'That's as far as I've gotten.'

'We'd have to have another meeting after that, between the three of us, where you will reveal the meaning of my vision and I will reveal to you that I am pregnant.' Lillyannu gave a heavy sigh.

'That should buy us another month at least.' Simüte nodded. 'And from what I know of this spell you need to perform the preparation will take a good couple of months; by then the child should have been born.'

'And if its not?'

'We do whatever it takes to delay.'

'Simüte I am afraid.'

'I know,' he placed a hand on her shoulder, 'but, whatever happens Lilly, he cannot know we have talked about this. We're both betraying his trust right now, but it's the only way. God Lilly, how could you have been so stupid?'

'I don't know,' she lowered her gaze. 'What happens when the child is born? Who will take care of it?'

'I will. But in exchange I want you to make sure I remember our heritage after you've performed the spell.'

'But...?'

'I came into this world a Lutoni and I plan to leave it as one.'

'Okay,' she nodded, 'but only if you promise me you'll love my child like your own.'

'Of course I will, how can you even ask that? Lilly your child will be safe with me, no matter what I'll protect it with my life. I promise.'

After Tristan had entered the same trance the others were in, SK had also attempted to join them. But no matter how many times he reached towards the doll he got nothing. He didn't know if it was because of his own incompetence or because he simply didn't have the same invitation to join them Tristan did, but he still found it really frustrating. Tristan was alive and powerless and yet without the slightest bit of effort he was proving himself to be more worthy of the Guardian title than SK could ever hope to be. It wasn't fair.

'It's not you, you know, it's him,' the sound of the strangers voice made SK jump more than a little.

He turned to see an ageless looking man in a simple white kilt watching him. For a few long moments SK wasn't totally sure what to say. His tongue skated across his lips several times before he finally managed to find words to force out of his mouth.

'Do you... do you have something to do with them?'

'I am in the story,' he nodded, 'but my role is fairly small.'

'So then...?'

'I wanted to speak to you,' the man shrugged, 'I could sense your jealousy.'

'I'm not jealous,' SK licked his lips, 'I mean... not exactly.'

'It doesn't come naturally to all Guardians you know,' the stranger half turned away from him. 'That's why potentials are... put to one side after their deaths. It's necessary to give them all an equal chance of picking up the skills and the knowledge and the knowhow. You weren't given that chance, you were just launched headfirst into a position most Guardians would struggle with; after all the responsibilities of the Helper are more than a little daunting.'

'What would you know about it?' SK studied him.

'I'm a Vii Sen,' he folded his arms, 'my death and my birth were pretty much the same event, so I had my whole existence to be put to one side.'

'What do you mean?'

'It's not common, but occasionally Vii Sens also display the qualities the Mistresses look for in potential Guardians. I was one of those,' he sighed, 'and they really wanted me too. See several of the Guardians who were around at the time were coming close to their ascension.'

'Their what?'

'The process by which the dead rejoin the light. Their existences were coming to an end and the Mistresses were hopeful that either myself or one of my Sen Khines would fill one of the openings.'

'Your Sen Khines?'

'Other versions of myself from other realities. In the Circle of Six all of my Sen Khine were also Vii Sen, it was why we were sent to our individual Sils to keep us out of the way.'

'I see,' SK licked his lips. 'So did one of you become a Guardian then?'

'Much to their disappointment, no,' his gaze turned towards Joey. 'You see those special qualities we had were there to serve a different purpose. In my mind a greater purpose,' he flicked his gaze back towards SK, 'but they don't see it that way. But then they never could see it.'

'See what?'

'The importance of the ending,' a soft smile formed on his lips.

'You mean the child?' SK frowned.

'So much potential was lost because of mortal lies and godly ignorance.' He gave a stilted half laugh. 'We don't know why we restless spirits can see it, but we can. Maybe it has something to do with the story repeating itself, I don't know. None of us know for sure. But I can tell you one thing,' he took several steps towards SK and placed a hand on his arms, 'in this version you are to play the part I should have played. Or at least the part I should have played better.'

'What part is that?'

'Protector,' he pronounced the word with care, 'you're supposed to be the protector. But unlike me it's all of them you need to protect. You are not me, that's why you are neither in the story nor a part of it, but you are my equivalent. You are one of the details which has changed. You are one of the reasons the ending can be different this time. And this is all about the ending.'

'Is the child really so important?'

'Like you wouldn't believe.' A strange smile tugged at his lips. 'Promise me you'll protect them SK. Promise me you'll make sure the ending is different this time. The ending is important. The child is important. The story has already been set into motion; make sure you're ready for it. Make sure you get the ending right. This is all about the ending. This is all about the child.'

He had no idea how many times he'd paced back and forth across the room as he waited for her to return. It felt like an eternity had passed since he'd sent her on his little errand and he couldn't understand why she wasn't back yet. When she finally returned he crossed the distance between them and took hold of her shoulders. For a long couple of minutes he stared into her eyes almost too afraid to ask what he knew he must ask.

'What do you know?' The words felt dry in his mouth.

'She still says you're evil for lying to her father,' his fourteen year old daughter lowered her gaze. 'I don't think she'll ever stop hating you and I'm not sure I blame her.'

'Did she say anything else?'

'She... um...'

'She what?'

'She's scared because… because…'

'Annu tell me.'

'She's scared because she's pregnant father and she doesn't know what to do.'

'Pregnant,' the word hit him like a fist in the stomach. 'Please... please tell me Khi's not the father.'

'Of course its Khi's who else's would it be?' Annu stared at him. 'If I can get her to swallow her pride maybe...'

'No,' he backed away from her.

'No what father?'

'No, she can't come back here now.'

'But...?'

'How could they do this?' He turned away from his daughter. 'How...?

'Father they're in love.' Annu took a step towards him. 'This child is just a part of their love so if we can convince Kayma to swallow her pride and come home...'

'No,' he cut her off, 'no she can't come home now.'

'But...?'

'You don't understand,' he shook his head in disbelief, 'how could you? This... this is such a mess.'

'It doesn't have to be father,' Annu placed a hand on his arm, 'Khi loves her and I'm sure he'll be willing to marry her. She can come home.'

'No she can't. Not now. She can't come home now.'

'Why not?'

'Because Khi cannot marry Kayma; I won't allow it.'

'Father...?'

'You have no idea... you have no idea what they've done.' He began pulling at his hair. 'And I thought she was a forbidden child. But this... I cannot accept this. I cannot accept her. Not anymore. She cannot return here. I won't allow her to return here. I can't.'

'Father I don't understand...'

'Of course you don't,' he stared at her, 'but this is the price I have to pay. This is the price I have to pay for her mistake. For her deception. For her lies. This is the price I have to pay and it kills me Annu. It kills me more than you'll ever be able to understand. But Kayma cannot return here now, not ever, she just can't.'