Mabel slammed the door to her room. She started angrily pacing the floor, fists curled and arms pointing straight down. There was a knock at the door.
"Go away!" was Mabel's response.
From the other side she heard "It's Isabella, please open up."
Mabel somewhat reluctantly let Isabella in, then slammed the door behind her.
"What do you want?" she asked, arms crossed.
"You're upset, I'm here to talk to you about it," shrugged Isabella.
"What is there to talk about? My brother is right. I've spent all of the summer obsessing over every guy I meet, and all roads lead to nowhere. I'm pathetic." Mabel collapsed on her bed.
"I know what you mean," said Isabella, sitting on the bed next to her, "I've spent my whole summer chasing after a boy too, and it just goes nowhere. I've done all I can, but I… oh well. I might as well tell you, so you know, that I'm talking about Phineas."
Mabel stared at Isabella with deadpan face and uttered in monotone, "Woah, what a shock."
Then she straightened up and asked, "How do you deal?"
Isabella did something Mabel had always wanted to see happen in real life: she began a spontaneous musical number, with no discernible music source.
AN: This musical number starts out a bit more somber, like "What Might Have Been", but when the chorus arrives it's more an up-beat party tune (I was thinking along the lines of "You Can't Stop the Beat" from Hairspray). When Isabella sings, a montage plays of her failing to tell Phineas how she feels, and when Mabel sings it's a montage of her failed relationships.
"I've tried and tried to tell him,
but he won't turn my way
if he would only listen
the things that I could say
I guess we'll be the best of friends
as I'm haunted by my dreams
I guess I'll have to live with us
being much less than what we seem…"
Mabel was wide eyed. She stood up and whispered, "Wow, you guys have show tunes? That's— superawesometacularifimazing! Can I try?"
"Be my guest," said Isabella. Mabel began singing.
"I only want to hold someone
to let them know I care
But I turn around around in my time of need
and no one's ever there.
I try and try to make it work
and sacrifice it all
but the more I try to pick myself up
the more I seem to fall."
Isabella: "But I'll always be here for you…"
Mabel: "…And I'll be by your side."
Isabella: "So let's rock out together,"
Mabel: "Get the joy we've been denied…!"
[CHORUS]
"'Cause I don't need no man
to be happy or to feel like me
I don't need no man
to have fun or to value me
I can fend for myself, you'd better bet I can
'cause I don't need no man!"
Elsewhere, Candace sat in Wendy's room. Wendy had been talking about how Candace should forget about what Jeremy was doing and just have fun, when suddenly she heard music without any discernible music source. She stood wide eyed.
"What's that?" she asked.
"Oh, that's your queue," replied Candace in a rather matter of fact tone.
"Queue for what?"
"You know…" said Candace, but she only got a blank stare in return.
"Just start singing."
AN: This part is the same tune as before, but a bit more upbeat.
Wendy:
"You gotta let go of your feelings
and feel just for yourself
get up and seize the day
put your worries on a shelf.
No one here will judge you
if you don't let them judge
you can go swimming in a fountain
or eat a mountain of fudge!"
Candace:
"I can be myself today
from boyfriend troubles, I'll be free
with a girlfriend by my side
I can finally be me!"
Candace and Wendy: [CHORUS]
"'Cause I don't need no man
to feel secure or to feel safe
I don't need no man
to put this smile on my face
I can have fun all by myself, yeah you bet I can
'cause I don't need no man!
[BRIDGE]
Mabel: "I have to take control of my own life!"
Candace: "I can act independently!"
Isabella: "I can put aside my fears, my strife!"
Wendy: "I can do what's best for me!"
All:
"Yes I'll set my spirit free!"
[CHORUS]
I don't need no man
to tell me what to do
I don't need no man
to make it through
I'll believe in myself, I'm my biggest fan
yeah I don't need no man!
Yeah I don't need no man
and I'll make a stand
I won't stay my hand, I'll be who I am
and I'll follow the plan, and I won't say can't
'cause I
Dont
Need
No
MAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!
AN: That's the end of the song. I'd like to see someone record this and post it on youtube. Most of the imagery in this song is just the girls singing either in their rooms or against colorful backgrounds, but when Candace says "independently" she's wearing a powdered wig in Liberty Hall and holding a quill to some parchment, but looking really serious, just for laughs.
Mabel stood in her room with Isabella, and put her arms down from the long note she'd just held. She grabbed Isabella and shouted, "WOOOHOOO! I can cross being in an inexplicable musical number about myself off my bucket list! And speaking of which, that gives me an idea…"