Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.

The Alphabet Story

N is for Nightmare

~oOo~

Jane is stuck in the middle of a dream and she knows it. She knows it because her own personal demon is there. But he can't be, because Jane killed him, over three months ago. Before Jane met Maura, all her dreams were about her first encounter with Hoyt, and she would scream and scream and try to get away, just like she had in real life, and that's what made them so real. Before she ended it. But now, with Maura in her life, Jane's dreams are about that monster hurting Maura. It terrifies Jane because it had happened, and because it could have been so much worse and so most nights, Jane's mind went through all the different 'what-ifs'.

Almost every night, Jane goes to sleep and watches Hoyt hurt Maura. Jane begs for it to stop, for him to hurt her instead, and then she turns to threatening. She threatens anything from death, to torture, to humiliation. And then as a final resort Jane bargains. She promises safety, life in prison, no death penalty if he just stops. She hates herself for offering these outs, even if it is just a dream, but Jane would do anything for Maura. And she did, she killed Hoyt.

Right now though, Jane is watching a horrific scene play out before her. Maura, tied to a chair as Hoyt advances on her. Jane struggles and curses and yells, but he never turns around. She hears Maura beg too, pleading for it to stop, pleading to be left alone but it never happens. Some nights, it never seems to end, others, she wakes up quicker. Tonight Jane is blessed and she is being pulled away quickly, she doesn't have to see as much and she can hear Maura's voice in her ear.

"You're fine, you're safe, your home. Everything's okay, we're okay, we're alive. It's over, you finished it remember? You ended it and we're here," Maura's voice is soft and soothing, calming you as it always does and Jane rolls herself over to say thankyou. Again. She looks over at Maura, and immediately notices a bruise blossoming over her cheek. Jane pull back, horrified, knowing that she must have lashed out in her sleep. It wasn't the first time it had happened, and she had hated herself for three days afterward, sleeping on the couch until Maura yelled at her for being stupid.

"Its fine Jane," Maura says immediately, trying to reassure her.
Jane narrows her eyes, not believing Maura and gets out of bed and stomps down the stairs, ready to fulfil her penance and sleep on the couch, but Maura follows her this time. Usually, Maura would let Jane storm off and mope for the night, but apparently not tonight.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli!" Maura's voice is a yell and Jane cowers slightly. She hates being 'full-named', a right usually reserved only by her mother, but Maura had started doing it too.

"You get upstairs right now Jane," Maura orders.

Jane looks at Maura's angry posture and then down at the floor.

"Maura, I hurt you," Jane mumbles.

Maura huffs, which is such an un-Maura-like sound that Jane looks up to see the most disgruntled expression on her face.

"It doesn't hurt Jane, its just subcutaneous bruising, it'll go away in a few days and can be covered with makeup easily," Maura's voice is soft now, and has a pleading quality to it. "Please come upstairs. Not sleeping with you hurts more than a bruise ever could."

Jane's resolve crumbles completely when she hears Maura's declaration ad she sighs before getting up and walking over to her.

"What did I do to deserve you?" Jane says as she kisses Maura's bruised cheek as gently as she can manage.

"I assume that's a rhetorical question? Or do you actually want me to answer it?" Maura asks.
Jane laughs and the two walk up the stairs, hand in hand, back to bed and a dreamless sleep.

~oOo~

Today, Jane woke up in the middle of the night after a nightmare. She heard Maura's soothing voice murmuring in her ear to ground her. Then when Jane tried to sleep on the couch, Maura all but drag her back upstairs. Jane loves her.