Chapter 13: The Depths Of Longing

{A/N: Here's Another Update...Still Busy at work, hopefully this will suffice until the next off day.}

My Thanks To All My Readers and Reviewers...Enjoy S.S.

Snape's Bedroom, Snape's Estate, Muggle World...

Sweat poured off Severus Snape as he tossed and turned in the center of his bed as thoughts of Hermione Granger filled his mind and tantalized him with what he knew very well that he couldn't have given her devotion to Ronald Weasley. He scoffed as his obsidian eyes sprang open and he found himself staring up at the ceiling. He couldn't get the witch out of his mind and it mattered not if she had gone or stayed given how they seemed to be walking on egg shells around each other. The dark wizard knew he had no right to pressure the witch about her warring emotions concerning her wayward husband. She had come to him needing some place safe with someone she could trust, the last thing she needed was an emotional lecture about her horrid life choices.

With a sigh, Snape sat up wiping the sweat from his brow and climbed out of bed.

He moved about the estate with the same graceful footwork as he had Hogwarts given how many years he had spent there since the second wizarding war's end. It was late in the night and the house had been quiet. His mishandling of Hermione earlier had prompted him to keep himself busy for the rest of the day and he came in only when he had been sure she and the children had gone off to bed to avoid any more awkward situations. Neither of them knew how to progress beyond what happened nor return to the way things had been before.

Snape made his way down the stairs so lost in his thoughts about how he should have handled the situation with the young witch that he almost didn't notice the crackling of the fireplace and the silhouette in the sitting room. Once he reached the base of the stairs, Snape noticed the figure in the semi-darkness and immediately changed course from the kitchen to the sitting room.

He didn't need to be told that the lone figure had been Hermione Granger, curled up on the sofa in the comfort of the semi-darkness. Apparently, she had not been able to sleep very much either.

"Miss Granger?" said Snape confused as to why she'd be out of bed at this hour.

Hermione looked up at Snape and he could see the faint glow of the fire from what he knew to be tears that streamed down her supple cheeks. Without thinking, Snape moved toward the sofa as she got to her feet and met him half way. She wrapped her arms around his lean pale body as he wrapped his arms around her slender frame and felt the immediate wetness of her apparent tears against his exposed chest.

"I...I can't believe he slept with her." she babbled amid tears and heartbreak.

Snape tried to catch himself up to speed with whom she had been referring to as she continued to hold onto him, seemingly for dear life.

"As I have said many times before, Weasley is an idiot." he said rather bluntly.

This earned a slight chuckle from Hermione as she pulled back long enough to look up at him.

The unmistakable scent of firewhiskey had been on the saddened witch's breath as she pressed her body into his once more. Snape gripped her as tightly as she gripped him in that moment. Knowing all too well that she must have been suffering a great deal in silence and he had brought it all to the surface.

"I missed you." she said evenly. "I missed you so much...I didn't think about much of anything anymore."

Snape seemed to understand simply holding the witch as she burst into more tears as her mind took her back to that terrible night all those years ago.

"I've missed you too." he admitted. "More than you'd ever know and far more than I would care to admit."

"You're right you know." said Hermione pulling back once more. "I never would have married him if I had known that you were still alive."

Snape stroked her cheek wiping away the tears with his long pale fingers.

"I know." he said with a serious expression on his face.

"I mean...it's not as if I am not thrilled to have Rose and Hugo..." she said quickly feeling the guilt of imagining another life and time. "I love my children...it's just..."

"You wish they could have been mine." he replied finishing the through she struggled to complete.

Hermione nodded.

"I know it's a terrible thing to say..." she began.

"It's not so terrible when one thinks about it." replied Snape stroking her cheek once more. "I have often thought the same thing now and again...but the important thing to remember is that they are YOUR children Hermione."

"I shouldn't be saying things like this." said the witch pulling away entirely as her guilt began to come into play once more. "I mean...Ron's my husband for Merlin's sake...we have a life...a family."

"Yes." said Snape not at all wishing to be undone once more by her Gryffindor guilt. "All of those things that he didn't even consider when he happily lept into another witch's bed."

More tears streamed down Hermione's cheeks.

Rather than press on with the conversation as before, Snape swept the crying witch into his arms and carried her up toward her bedroom. Her emotions were getting the better of her and the drink wasn't doing her any favors.

He had been impressed that she only managed to consume enough to lessen her inhibitions when speaking with him as opposed to being outright drunk. It was possibly due to her being a mother and obtaining the habit for needing to listen for her children. Either way, She had been worn out from her outward emotional battle.

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Hermione's Bedroom, Snape's Estate, Muggle World...

Severus Snape ventured into the witch's assigned bedroom during her stay at his estate and layed her slender body onto the bed. No sooner had he gotten her down amid the covers, the witch swiftly pressed her soft pink lips into his pale ones. Caught off guard, Snape allowed the witch to pull him down onto the bed with her unable to resist her surprising charm. He smiled against her lips noting how bold she always seemed to be when it came to him and how she was more than willing to put her hopes and ambitions in place for him even when no one else saw her reasons for doing so.

"I don't wish to be alone tonight." said Hermione softly.

Snape could see the vulnerability behind her amber eyes and the heard the pain in her voice as she spoke. It would be so easy to take her and blame it on the absence of her Gryffindor moral compass and she'd believe it too with how forward she was being. Taking a moment to fight off his own impending need, The Potions Master made the decision to ignore his own warring thoughts in a bid to comfort the young witch that had needed him so badly.

Seeing that he had no other choice, as to abandon her now would possibly close any doors pertaining to his attempts to get her to see his affections for her. He had no doubt in his mind that Weasley had screwed up more than her sense of self, given how often he had abandoned her to pursue his own selfish gains. He would not be so callow, and insensitive.

"Alright Granger." he said softly. "But this is only because you need sleep."

Hermione smiled rather pleasantly. Snape wrapped his arms around her slender waist and kissed her neck as she settled into sleep. The scent of jasmine from her notoriously bushy brown hair made the Potions Master smile.

"You know for a greasy git, you smell delightful." said Hermione taking a deep breath and making herself more comfortable.

"Careful witch." said Snape noting how hard she pressed her slender frame against him.

It was clear that the drink was starting to take effect on her as she shifted in bed in a bid to get a better look at the wizard lying beside her. She touched his face smiling pleasantly as her delicate fingers brushed against his sallow pale cheek much as it had the night she kissed him for the first time.

"You were always such an amazing man." she said allowing the drink to lessen her inhibitions. "I knew it the very first time I saw you."

"You were always an insufferable know it all." he replied in a bid to keep control of his emotions in the wake of her current state.

Hermione kissed him once more enjoying the feeling as she pressed her slender frame into his lean body once more.

"So much better than kissing Ron." she remarked.

Snape smirked naturally pleased she believed her own husband inferior to him in even the most basic of circumstances.

"Naturally, I am not a petty child playing at being an adult." replied Snape. "That is the difference when one deals with a man that knows exactly what he wants."

Hermione shook her head.

"I didn't believe it when I first came here, but you've changed somehow since the last time we saw you."

"How so?" replied Snape with a smirk.

"You seem to be more at peace here." she said gazing into his obsidian eyes.

"Well I do have you here in my arms, I suppose that would account for something." he replied.

Hermione laughed a bit still enamored with his dry sense of humor.

They shared another passionate kiss and Snape pulled away.

"Get some sleep." he said softly. "I'll remain here until you are pleasantly off to dreamland and then I shall return to my own bed."

"Do you have to?" whined Hermione clinging to him.

"I'm afraid I do considering the children will have questions come morning." replied The Potions Master. "Don't worry so much Hermione, I fully intend to pursue you and I will await your divorce before engaging you if that is what you are worried about...I am after all a very patient man if nothing else."

The sleepy witch had liked the sound of that as she allowed herself to relax and drift off to sleep still clinging to the wizard of her dreams as if he had been a life raft in the uncharted sea. She had not thought very much on her marriage to Ron while in the company of Severus Snape, but she had known from the way he described how she lived her life now, it was a far cry from the witch she used to be and she had ever intention of making a return to her intended course.