Chapter 13

Leo brought his brothers and friends not back to the orphanage they were staying in but the place where it all started; the docks. Discarding their disguise and waiting for night to fall to make a plan of action. Shadow gave them the knowledge of what is really happening though in a physical form she does not remain she does in spirit. Leo told Casey and April the truth of that night while Mikey listened and replayed the night in his mind himself. When the memories became too much for him Mikey would squeeze Leo's hand so Leo remind him that he was still with him. Leo looked back to the warehouse that once held the bomb and was filled with people was nothing but silence.

With a heavy weight on his shoulders, Leo stepped into the room where everything changed. Walking over to the container with the all too familiar symbol painted on it remembered him of who was causing all of their problems. Leo moved the door slightly so he could get a better look in with April by his side to help in the investigation.

"Leo, look." April said pointing to a piece of paper with his name written on the cover attached by a knife on the inside of the door.

Leo took the paper and turned it over the writing on the outside was all too familiar.

"It's Donnie's handwriting." Leo said as he opened the piece of paper.

Leo read aloud,

"Hello brother by now you have discovered that Raph hasn't been in his right mind because of me. True to this I will take full credit for all of it and will only ask you this, do you care about Raphael even though he was the cause for all of your suffering? Raphael is now in the sewers on a rampage because of I reminded him how good it felt to be given his "Medicine". You better come and get him before he goes to the surface and reveals to everyone what a monster looks like. Love Donnie.

P.S. You can already guess who put the rat to sleep by now, can you?"

Leo looked at his friends and brother.

"I have to go alone." Leo stated.

"What? Leo have you gone insane?" Casey shouted.

"Yeah Leo you can't do everything yourself." Mikey added.

"Leo" April walked over and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Why now?" April asked.

"Because it started with me and Raph and now it has to finish. Shadow…Shadow was the one who said I had to start making decisions on my own so here I am. While I stop Raph you need to get to the lair with Mikey and try and stop Donnie. I'm not sure now this all started but he needs to be stopped." Leo warned.

"But-"

"No buts Mikey I need to see this through the end. Shadow…Shadow would have wanted me to do something on my own and since she is gone I need to do this for myself. Don't worry Baby brother I'll get Raph back." Leo said.

Mikey nodded his head looking down at his feet he could picture a fight with his two older brothers but with only one victor; Raph. Raph standing proudly over Leo's torn body the image scared him. Mikey looked at his brother to see that his drive to save Raph over his own life was stronger than it had been in years.

"Okay Leo I trust you." Mikey said.

Leo separated from everyone else and started looking for Raph in the abandoned train car area Shadow had him in. While Mikey, Casey, and April went to the lair to seek out Donnie.

"Mikey you okay bud?" Casey asked looking at Mikey's face.

Mikey shook his head.

"Leo shouldn't be doing this on his own." Mikey said.

"I know how you feel Mikey but Leo needs to do this." April said placing a comforting hand on his shoulder

"What happens if Raph kills Leo?" Mikey shouted stopping in placed.

"Mikey Leo will be fine." April said trying to reassure the nervous turtle.

"No! You weren't there; you didn't see the smile on his face!" Mikey shouted.

"Mikey we-"

"Forget this. I'm going to save my big brother." Mikey shouted.

Mikey started running away from April and Casey towards Leo's direction.

"Who are you saving Mikey, Leo or Raph?" Casey shouted.

"I'm saving both of them from their selves!" Mikey answered.

While Mikey was running towards Leo's direction, Leo was searching for Raph near the train car Shadow was keeping him in. A small trail of blood lead him towards their old home before the mouser attack. Stopping at the collapsed opening Leo listened carefully for the sounds of someone muttering to themselves.

Leo followed the noise inside to see Raph huddled in a corner in their old room rocking himself back and forth with his back turned to him. Whispering to himself an old lullaby Splinter told them in Japanese to help calm them so they could go to sleep.

"Raph?" Leo whispered.

But Raph continued to whisper to himself the lullaby.

"Raph it's me Leo, I'm here to help you." Leo said softly bending down and placing a hand on Raph's shoulder.

The moment Leo touched Raph; Raph flinched and went into a rage. Pulling out his weapon Leo jumped back as Raph charged at him with his sais pointing straight at him. Leo pulled out his katanas and blocked the attack. Pushing Raph off and sending him back to his corner. Raph and Leo circled each other with Raph panting heavily.

"Raph you need to listen to me, you are not well." Leo stated.

"Shut up Leo! You're supposed to be dead. Why can't you stay dead?" Raph yelled.

Raph charged again at Leo but all Leo had to do was sidestep and sweep Raph's feet under him. Raph fell to the ground but quickly pushed himself onto his back, using his hands he pushed himself back to his feet, grabbing his sais he threw one at Leo's head. Leo ducked barely missing it and was able to jump to the side as Raph charged at him with his other sai. Raph rammed himself into the wall pushing on the wall Raph picked up his sais and pointed one at Leo.

"You're not the boss of me Leo. Splinter made me! Raph pointed at himself with his sai. "Me the leader. You're nothing but a disgrace to this family and its name." Raph stated.

Leo felt a sharp pang in his heart but pushed it aside.

"The only one being a disgrace here is you Raph. Look at yourself you are not well. You need help." Leo said.

"I don't need anyone's help. I can do this on my own!" Raph shouted charging once again at Leo.

Leo and Raph's blades interlocked each other with Raph and Leo just inches away from each other's faces.

"Then what about Shadow?" Leo questioned.

Leo and Raph pulled themselves away from each other. Raph charged at Leo, swinging his sais in crazed directions just trying to find an opening.

"What about that kid?" Raph answered.

"She was helping you. You were getting better." Leo said.

Raph and Leo's weapons clashed again.

"She did nothing but make me feel sick. Whatever she did had no effect on me." Raph pointed out.

Leo wiped the sweat from his brow.

"Then why did I watch a recording of you talking to Donnie about feeling better because of her Raph? She was helping you and because of Donnie you're like this again." Leo stated.

"Don't bring Donnie into this Leo. He's innocent. She was the devil and I'll make you pay for taking the side of an outsider." Raph shouted.

Raph once again charged at Leo but this time was different. Raph was out of his mind and because of this he did not care for honor. Raph made a stabbing motion towards Leo's left side. Leo caught it and pushed Raph into a pile of debris. Leo walked closer to Raph to see if he could try and talk to him again but as soon as Leo was just a few feet from Raph, Raph turned and threw a fist full of dust in Leo's eyes.

Leo caught in the dust cloud started coughing and walking away trying to clear his eyes and breathe normally. Raph took this opportunity and went to attack Leo but only with his fist.

Leo was only able to raise his arms in defense as they both tumbled to the ground. Raph on top of Leo started throwing fist after fist at Leo where ever he could hit. Face, arms, chest, anywhere he could attack Leo, Raph made sure he would feel each fist. Leo unable to move or breathe correctly continued to cough and keep his eyes tightly closed. Tears ran from the corner of his eyes either from his eyes trying to fight the dust in them or from the heart break of his younger brother mercilessly attacking him in an unhonorable way.

When Raph saw the tears he stopped and started laughing uncontrollably.

"What are these, tears? So now you're afraid now. Of what, little old me? Come on Leo you're the eldest brother. The better brother, the one everyone loved." Raph said.

"I'm scared Raph. I do not fear you, I fear of what you have become." Leo said.

Leo wiped his eyes and come now see clearly the look on Raph's face. Raph wasn't anger but confused, his shoulders were moving up and down from his heavy breathing.

"What? What do you mean Leo?" Raph asked.

Leo was shocked a bit Raph's voice wasn't crazed or confused like it was before now he sounded like the old Raph.

"Raph think back to the last time you felt like this. Who helped you?" Leo asked.

While Raph tried to recall the name Leo let his arms fall to the ground. Bruised and slightly bleeding Leo couldn't move or defend himself if Raph choose to attack him again.

"Shadow" Raph muttered.

A flash of Shadow sitting with Raph still tied down to his cot from the beginning to the last time he saw her filled his head.

"Yes Raph but you need to know that Shadow wasn't really here." Leo tried to explain.

"What do you mean Leo? She was here I felt her presence, her touch, her voice she was really." Raph shouted.

"Raph calm down and let me explain." Raph was dangerously leaning towards his discarded sais with his hand hovering over one. "Shadow was just like that to me and others but you need to know that Shadow died nine years ago. I don't know how or why do you she came to help us until her time was up and she had to return. Raph she may be gone but what she did for us remains. Think about what she did and how you felt. I know you were better and only changed when one thing happened."

The moment Leo reminded Raph of Donnie and their conversation. Raph yelled out in pain falling backwards onto his back then his side, holding his head and tightly closing his eyes.

Leo used what little strength he had in his arms to push him up and ran to his brother's side.

"Raph! Raph! Can you hear me?" Raph was struggling with the pain in his head. "Raph I'm here with you, you don't have to do this alone anymore." Leo yelled.

Raph's breathing increased and Leo feared for his brother's heart because of the stress.

"Raph, brother please you need to calm down I'm here. I need you to listen to me." Leo shouted.

Raph looked at Leo out of the corner of his eye but something was wrong when Raph looked at Leo his vision was red and Leo's body morphed into the Shredder hovering over him laughing. Raph reached over to his sai in one quick slash strike at the figure in his mind he believed to be the Shredder.

Leo fell backwards onto the ground clutching his bleed his wound on his head. Raph's sai cut across Leo's face from the left side of Leo's cheek diagonally across his eye to the top of his head. Looking with his good eye Leo watched as Raph staggered over pointing the tip of one of Leo's swords at Leo again.

Unable to move Leo or defend himself Leo stood up and gave himself to Raph. Just as Raph was slicing across Leo's face again a streak of orange passed Leo's eyes. Leo watched in slow motion as he was pushed out of the way of Raph falling to his side. Leo was forced to watch with his good eye Mikey falling in front of Raph's attack.

Mikey stared and watched in fear as Raph sliced down with the sword. Then everything thing went red. Mikey fell to his side trying to stop the bleed. Leo ran over ignoring Raph to his brother's side. Leo pushed Mikey to his side and started to take off his bandana and belts to help stop the bleed.

"Hey Leo. Sorry I'm late." Mikey chuckled.

"Just be quickly Mikey, everything will be alright." Leo said pulling the ropes tightly.

Mikey winced in pain.

"It's okay Leo it's just an arm." Mikey tried to joke looking down at the mess of belts, pads, and bandana.

Leo moved his eyes to the mess then moved to the pool under them. Mikey's arm fell just a few feet away from them near Raph.

"Oh Mikey what you done." Leo whispered stroking his brother's sweaty face.

Raph confused at this site looked at the arm then the two bodies under the pool of blood.

'What have you done? No! What have I done?' Raph thought.

'You let your mind wander and see things for what they weren't.'

Raph looked around trying to find the origin of the voice. Two small hands touched Raph's cheeks and held his head.

'Hello Raph remember me?'

'Shadow?' Raph thought.

'Yes, I'm wondering why you let your eyes be the things you trusted more than your heart.' Shadow said.

'I…I just thought-'

'That's the problem Raph you thought instead of listened. Now look what happened.' Shadow said stepping aside so Raph could see the damage of his actions.

Raph followed the trail of destruction of his fight with Leo. Then when he believed that the Shredder found him, the attack on Leo once again robbing him of one of his eyes, but worse of all the body of his baby brother yards away; bleeding out in front of him.

Raph discarded the sword and reached for his sai. Raph stared at the point of the sai.

'Do what you must but remember with every action there is a reaction.' Shadow said before disappearing again.

Raph gulped.

"Leo. Mikey." Raph called out.

Leo turned to Raph and with Mikey on his lap Mikey turned his head to the side.

"Raph?" Mikey whispered.

"Raph, what are you going to do with that?" Leo said nervously.

Raph looked down at the tip of the sai then to his brothers back to the sai. His mind clearer than it ever could be.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything." Raph said.

The moment Raph said this Raph's sai quickly moved towards him. Raph stabbed himself deeply in his left eye. Leo took Mikey off his lap and ran to Raph. Raph fell to his side the sai still inside of his head. Leo placed his name over the wound.

"Why Raph? Why did you do this?" Leo chocked out.

Raph smiled and looked at Leo with his good eye.

"Because this is all my fault."