I'm really excited about this chapter I hope you like it!

Emily's PoV

I heard JJ's voice but it sounded a million miles away. I licked my suddenly dry lips and picked at my fingernails. Why had I agreed to do this? Maybe I should just tell her I'm tired and want to go to bed? No, I'd already agreed; there was no going back now.

I noticed then the inquisitive way JJ had been looking at me. I really needed to pay more attention. "Sorry, what did you say Jaje?"

She offered me a sad smile. "It's fine. I just asked if you're ready to share?"

I cleared my throat awkwardly. "Of course. Why would you ask?"

She adjusted herself on the quilt we sat on. "It-it's just." She sighed. It was shaky and unsure. "You've been consumed by this-this thing- ever since you came here. I don't know what it is- but it must be awful. It's dark and it's got a hold on you Em. I can see it in your eyes when you think no one's looking. I just want you to be alright. To stop being scared."

Tears burned the back of my eyes like hot daggers. I promised myself I wouldn't cry. But JJ was just being so- so understanding. I wasn't used to it but I think I liked it.

"I can go first if you want." She said noticing the tears that glazed my eyes like ice over a pond.

I nodded my head furiously, not speaking. I didn't trust myself to speak; not without weakness.

"Alright, look I don't want to cry, but if I do is there any chance I could have a hug?" My whole face lit up. She wanted me to comfort her? I could finally be useful!

I nodded again and tucked a stray lock of hair behind my ear. She smiled at me. "Well here we go. So I'm married to this guy named Will. Don't get me wrong he's a nice guy but sometimes- I don't know he can just be kind of..."

"Controlling?" I suggested. I didn't want to offend her but judging by her conversation he sounded that way.

Her honey coloured brows furrowed together. "Yeah, actually. I mean- it's just." She sighed again. "I love him but he just doesn't understand sometimes. We have a son but we're not married. I want to stay together for him but I don't know how much more I can take of him harping on me."

A small smile haunted my face. I loved kids. "What's his name?"

She smiled then too. "Henry."

"Do you fight a lot? When he's around I mean." I didn't want her to fee like I dissecting her personal life but I wanted to try and help her.

"We try not to but sometimes he just makes me so mad. I just shut up and don't argue so Henry doesn't worry but then he thinks that he won."

"Well if you do argue it might be better for him to just be with you, right?"

"I thought about that but it would be hard to try and sort out who he's with all the time and the travelling would be hard on him." Something in her eyes told me there was more to it then that.

My dark eyes probed her warm ones. "What else?"

Something flashed in her eyes. "That's all."

I set my jaw. "You told me you'd tell me the whole truth. Everything that was going on!" I hadn't realized but my voice had raised considerably.

Her voice was soft. "I think Will's cheating on me."

My face blanched. "Oh God JJ I'm so sorry!" I leaned forwards in my new pyjamas and enveloped her in a tight hug. Her arms raised slowly to my back. She squeezed gently at first but then she was hanging on for dear life. I felt warm liquid on my shoulder and knew that she was crying.

How long we stayed like that I wasn't sure but eventually she pulled back. I handed her a box of tissues. After she cleaned up she gave me a small smile.

"Thanks, I really needed to let that out."

I gave her a little pat on the arm. I sucked at comforting people. "No problem. You don't have to say anything else about it if you don't want to."

"Thanks for offering me a way out but I'm fine." She paused for a moment as she wiped again at her red eyes. "Her name is Kate. She's his partner at the station. I really hate it. It's mostly because he won't admit it. He knows that I know but he still won't say a word about it." My eyes filled with tears for the woman, who, in such a short period of time had become my closest confidant. I reached out and squeezed her hand.

She sniffled then chuckled a bit; in a dark, humourless way. "So what about you?" I blew out the breath I had been holding along with the hope that she would forget.

"This might take a while. Do you mind?" I mentally begged her to say yes. More than anything I didn't want her to have to carry the horrors of my past.

JJ nodded, her blonde hair fell forwards and caught in the light of the near by lamp. "It was one month after my sixteenth birthday." My voice sounded far away; as if it were caught at the end of a tunnel. "We- my mother and I- were in DC for a few months." I felt the warmth leave my body. "I was taking a walk. My mother and I had just had a huge fight. I told her I was leaving and never coming back. I didn't mean it though. I was going to stay out for a few hours- just enough to prove my point- then come back to the embassy. It wasn't a bad part of town; actually it was pretty nice- safe. These- these guys just came out of no where." My heart beat sped up to speeds only achieved by jets- or fear. "One of them asked me if I had any money. I said no. That's when the other three came up from behind. Later the doctors told me it was chloroform. My nose and eyes burnt then everything was consumed by this darkness." My hands were balled up into shaking fists. "When I woke up I was tied to a chair. Th- they raped me." The words sounded foreign on my lips. I had never said it out loud. If I didn't hear it it couldn't be real, right? But it felt so very real now. " They wouldn't stop. I asked them why was it me that they took? They said it was for the money. I never asked why they did what they did to me though. It seemed stupid, to ask, they were sick and that was all there was to it." I glanced at JJ then and saw a look of frozen horror on her face. A look that would suggest I were her own daughter, not merely an acquaintance.

"Oh God." Her voice was like a wisp of smoke from a dieing candle.

My voice was steely now, my shields drawn up as I spoke. "You know what the worst part was? It took my mother two weeks to call the cops. When they contacted her, asking for the money for my safe return, it had been one month. One month of the worst Hell you could possibly think of. By the time I was in the hospital it had been six weeks. You know they still haven't found them yet?"

Tears were streaming down JJ's face but mine remained stoic. I had cried those tears long ago. "When I first saw my mother she told me it was my fault." My voice was a whisper now. I hadn't planned on telling her that part but now that I had shared so much I felt like I should keep nothing from her. "She yelled at me. When I got out of the hospital there were cameras everywhere; reporters screaming questions. And that- that bitch- hugged me. Just for the cameras, like we were the best of friends. I can count on one hand the number of times she's showed me love."

I hadn't realized but I was pressed up against JJ's motherly form as she hugged me. She whispered in my ear that it would be alright. I would be fine. I always was.

"JJ?" I asked hoarsely.

"Yeah honey?"

"Can I tell you something? But you have to promise not to judge me."

"Of course Em. You can tell me anything."

I drew in a big breath. "I got pregnant. Those stupid bastards got me pregnant."

She bit the side of her lip. "What did you do?"

"I kept her. Until I gave birth anyways. She lives with some wealthy family in DC now." In a quieter tone I added: "I wanted to name her Amelia."

JJ hugged me and I hugged her and we sat like that for God knows how long; rocking with each other. I couldn't help but think about how badly I wanted JJ to be my mom. She was the first person I had told about the incident and somehow I felt lighter inside; as if my soul had shared with JJ some of the weight and darkness that plagued it. Yet all I could think about was that little girl being taken way from me wrapped in a fuzzy pink towel.

Yay! Lots of JJ/Em mother/daughter love! Please don't shoot me for hating on Will or for what I did to Emily in this chapter! Please review and don't be mad!