Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. They all belong to Stephenie Meyer.

A/N: After much pleading and begging, my faithful readers have persuaded me to go ahead and post this. Thanks to Juliegirl18 for beta'ing.

"Love is like Heaven, but it hurts like hell."

Anonymous

I sat down on the couch in my apartment, guitar in my hand, and began strumming the beginning notes of a song. It had been a week since I had seen Bella. I begged everyone we knew to tell me how she was. Emmett and Jasper said they had no clue because they had rarely seen their girls, let alone mine. Rose and Alice told me to let her be, to leave her alone. I knew why she wanted me to leave her alone. I had acted like a complete ass the last time she saw me. I let my fingers slowly play out the song on my guitar as I remembered the last time I had seen her.

After spending a few minutes on my kitchen floor crying my eyes out like the pussy that I had become, I began to get angry. Angry that she had the nerve to string me along like some fucking puppy while she continued to date Mike. Angry that she had thought about being with me again and had not spoken one word to me about it. Angry that she didn't want to hurt Mike, but didn't care that she was hurting me. Just fucking angry.

I opened up the freezer and saw that I was completely out of liquor. Lucky for me, I lived above a bar. Grabbing the keys to my apartment, I walked downstairs to find that the place seemed to be pretty damn busy. Walking behind the bar and ignoring Seth's questioning look, I grabbed a bottle of Jack and a shot glass and took a seat at one of the tables near the door.

After a few shots I finally began to feel numb, but I still couldn't forget the look on Bella's face when I told her about Mike. I knew I had fucked up when I told her about what he was clearly doing, but I couldn't stand by any longer and watch her get hurt.

A few minutes later, Tanya came and plopped her fucking ass right in my lap. I had been dodging her constantly in the past few weeks since she had decided to make it a mission to get in my pants. For some reason, the bitch couldn't get it in her fucking head that I wanted nothing to do with her.

"Hey there, Eddie," she said, running her hand up and down my chest. I wrinkled up my nose at the scent of her perfume, which was highly overwhelming.

"Don't call me Eddie," I growled at her, as she leaned in closer to me.

"Fine. What do you want me to call you? Sweetie? Honey? Lover?" she asked as she wiggled her ass in my lap. I groaned in frustration and figured I needed to do something to get this bitch off me and quick. I leaned in closer to her and she bent her head toward mine so I could whisper in her ear.

"You wanna fuck me don't you?" I whispered in her ear, as she shivered. The bell above the door chimed and caught my attention. Still leaning in close to Tanya, I let my gaze fall to the door and was surprised at who I saw. Bella was standing there, her eyes wide as she finally caught a glimpse of me. Being the asshole that I was in my drunken state, I decided she needed to feel a little pain as well. Running my hand along Tanya's naked thigh, I pulled her head closer to mine so I could whisper in her ear.

"You've been dreaming about me fucking you, haven't you?" I whispered in her ear, even though my eyes had never left Bella's. As I continued to run my hand up and down Tanya's leg, I winked at Bella. Even from where I was standing, I could see the tears pooling in her eyes. She rushed back out of the door just as quickly as she entered. Tanya was moaning and wiggling in my lap and pissing me off. I leaned in one more time to whisper in her ear.

"Well keep dreaming, because I will never fuck you. Do you hear me? Never." She pulled away from me and tried to pout, like it was going to change my mind.

"Get the fuck off me and don't touch me again," I demanded, as I pushed her off my lap onto the floor. I grabbed the bottle of liquor and the shot glass and stormed back up to my apartment, angrier than I had been when I left it.

I knew I had been a complete ass by pulling that shit with Tanya in front of Bella, but I had been drunk and pissed. And now, a week later, she hadn't given me the chance to talk to her and apologize. I knew that I would need to do a lot of groveling and shit, but hopefully Bella would believe me when I told her that nothing happened between Tanya and me.

I continued to strum my guitar and sing a little in the quiet of my apartment. After learning how much Bella had loved the song I had played when we made love, I made it my mission to learn to play the song myself. Since I had nothing but time in the past week, I had gotten better at it. I wanted to be able to play it for her one day, but I wasn't sure if I would ever get the chance.

"That's when you need someone,

Someone that you care for

When all your faith is gone,

It feels like you can't go on"

There was a loud banging at the door before I could get to the chorus of the song. Figuring it was some drunken bar patron, I got frustrated that they had interrupted my practice. Placing my guitar back on its stand, I walked over to the door and unlocked it. When I opened the door, I was shocked at who I saw.

Bella was standing there, her eyes red and swollen, tears continually running down her face. She surprised me by throwing herself at me. As I struggled to hold on to her, I kicked the door closed behind us.

"Bella, baby, what's wrong? What happened?" I asked her as I sat us down on the couch. She climbed in my lap and held tightly to me, continuing to sob.

"I had no where else to go. You were the only one," she cried, as her body shook with sobs. I held her tightly to me, running my hand up and down her back, trying to calm her cries. After a few minutes she seemed to have calmed down enough to talk to me.

"Bella, can you tell me what happened?" I asked her as she turned to face me. She used the back of her hand to wipe the remaining tears from her eyes before answering me.

"You were right, Edward. I walked into Mike's office tonight to talk to him and I caught him and Jessica. I caught them fucking in his office. I am such a fucking idiot, Edward! He had me completely fooled and I was such an idiot for not realizing it!" Bella screamed at me, her arms flailing in the air. I reached over and caught her hands and held them tightly in mine, bringing them down to rest in my lap.

"Bella, you are not an idiot. The fucker had you totally fooled. He let you see what he wanted you to see. The only reason I saw it is because I was once a guy like him. I like to think I have changed, but that doesn't mean I didn't recognize what he was doing. It's not your fault you didn't see it. He didn't want you to," I told her as she watched me intently. Bella continued to stare in my eyes, not speaking. I wondered briefly if she was okay, but her next actions let me know she was in fact, just fine.

Bella threw one of her legs across mine, straddling me on my couch. Forcefully, she grabbed the sides of my face and pulled me to her lips. At first I was too shocked to move, but soon I let my body take over and began to kiss her back in earnest. She rocked her hips against me as her mouth attacked mine. With each thrust of her hips, she made my cock harder and harder. I gripped her ass in my hands and pushed her down even harder on me. She broke away suddenly, gasping at the sensation.

"Fuck, Edward," she moaned as I kissed and bit at her neck. "That feels so fucking good." I knew in my head that we shouldn't be doing this tonight, but for some reason my body and my mind weren't cooperating at the moment. Bella began to kiss along the column of my neck and it felt good, but I was finally able to get my body to agree with my mind.

"Bella," I groaned out as she continued to move on top of my lap. "Baby, it feels so fucking good, but we can't do this right now. You know we can't." Bella's head dropped to my shoulder and her body began to shake with sobs again. I lifted her head off of my shoulder and made her look me in the eyes.

"Please don't cry. Please baby. I'm sorry, but you've gotta know deep down that we shouldn't do this right now, not tonight," I told her truthfully.

"I know," she said, nodding her head at me. I leaned forward and kissed her forehead as she sighed quietly.

"Why don't we get you into something more comfortable and you can stay the night here tonight. You look so tired and I don't think you should be driving in your condition right now anyway," I said as we both stood up from the couch. Bella agreed as we walked into my bedroom together.

I handed Bella some sweats and a t-shirt and sent her off to the bathroom to change. When she came out, she had washed her face and pulled her hair up and she looked a lot better than she had ten minutes ago. I pulled the covers back on the bed and allowed her to climb in. Tucking the covers around her, I bent down and kissed her lips gently. I stood to walk back into the living room, but Bella grabbed my wrist to stop me.

"Will you stay with me? Just until I fall asleep?" she asked me quietly.

"Where else am I gonna go?" I asked her as I settled myself down on the bed beside her. I knew we had a lot to talk about, but for now I knew she needed to sleep. She would be here in the morning and then we would talk.

A/N: I know this was a quick update and it's pretty short. I couldn't leave you guys hanging like that. Just to let you know, the next one won't be so quick. I am working on the update right now though.