I'm sorry for the delay. Enjoy!
I do not own the Hunger Games.
Peeta gently lifts Avalyn's lifeless body and walks out of the cave to the soft green field now illuminated by the moonlight. He slowly lowers her body onto the grass, tossing her luscious jet black hair over both her shoulders. Rei carefully approaches Peeta, hesitant, unsure of what to say to the boy who just lost his friend and district partner.
Peeta wipes a stray tear with the back of his hand, and attempts a weak smile at Rei before placing his right hand on her shoulder giving it a soft reassuring squeeze. He asks Rei to stay with Avalyn for a short while before he wonders off into the depth of the woods.
Rei crouches next to Avalyn and within seconds she begins to sob. She repeatedly apologizes to the young woman that now lies dead before her in the arena. I couldn't help but wonder what she was apologizing for. She took care of the injured Avalyn when Peeta was at the feast, and genuinely showed cared for her even though she was a complete stranger. She did more than what was expected of any tribute in this deadly game, she did not owe this apology to Avalyn.
Followed by a loud sniffle, Rei wipes her face clean with the sleeve of her jacket before running her hand down Avalyn's face. She smiles before whispering, "I don't think you're supposed to look happy when you're dead."
Soon Peeta returns, his hands piled high with countless flowers. The vibrant colors stand out in the dark, adding light to the gloomy atmosphere that surrounds the arena. He lowers himself next to them and begins to place the flowers around Avalyn's body, creating a beautiful bed of soft floras for her.
Only a man like Peeta could appreciate the beauty of the vibrant yellow, white, pink, red, and purple velvet textured flowers that litter the arena. He places Avalyn's hands in the center of her heart and wraps her fingers around a bright yellow dandelion.
He reaches inside his jacked for the Mockingjay pin and begins to place it through Avalyn's jacket when Rei stops him. "She wanted you to have it," she says glancing back at Avalyn. Peeta only nods before placing the pin back into his jacket, safely storing it away.
They step away from the body as the sound of the hovercraft echoes through the arena. As Peeta and Rei watch Avalyn's body lift into the air, Peeta's three fingers touch his lips and extend outward as he salutes Avalyn for the last time.
This salute means respect, it means love, and it means goodbye. Soon the entire district mimics his action and we salute our fallen female tribute.
Distraught, heartbroken, shattered.
No word can quite describe the current state of the butcher's son. His screams echo the square as his friends try to console him. Even his mother tries to embrace her son a few times only to be violently shoved back, her efforts proving futile. Alec points his fingers at his mother and father, yelling through clenched teeth that Avalyn's death was all their fault. It was their fault for disapproving of their courtship and forcing him to leave her. Her blood was on their hands, he screamed in a violent outburst.
When a friend tries to calm Alec he turns his wrath on him, accusing him of calling Avalyn a seam slut and demanding to know where his compassion was when he had tried repeatedly to make his friends understand of their relationship and their love which was nothing but genuine.
Alec eventually tires out and slumps to the ground, shaken and exhausted. Peeta's eldest brother rushes to his side and with the help of his other friends carry Alec off away from the square.
There is a slow recession of the crowd from the viewing. With the dramatic conclusion to the day's game coverage it was safe to assume that the rest of the evening would be an uneventful one.
It may be selfish of me to do this tonight but I decide to confront Gale of what I have known all along. As we make our way towards the Seam I suddenly come to a standstill and demand Gale to follow me to my house. He does so, obediently, and I wonder if he can read my mind despite my effort to keep my face as neutral as possible.
Gale enters the house first and I move to close the door behind us. I turn to demand the whereabouts of Peeta's letter when suddenly Gale's lips come crushing against mine, pressing my body hard against the front door.
A muffled sound escapes my lips from the sheer impact and force of the kiss. The passion I feel on his end is real, the kiss is not a random act. It means something.
It's forceful yet gentle, rough yet filled with love. I briefly close my eyes and allow Gale to really kiss me.
I had never kissed a boy and if anything I was relieved that it was Gale that I shared my first kiss with. But the moment he breaks away the kiss, a sudden anger flows through my bloodstream and all I see red.
I shove him back viciously causing Gale's eyes to snap open as they too fill with rage.
"What. The. Fuck." I enunciate each word as I continue to shove him back in quick powerful thrusts with my hands. Gale is strong and he can stop my violent advance, but he allows me to push him back until his body smashes into the kitchen table.
"I'm not sorry," Gale whispers, placing a hand on my cheek. I quickly throw his hand aside with both of mine and press my body against his, his back smashing against the kitchen table once again, making him wince.
"Where is the letter?" I demand, practically spitting in his face.
Its Gale's turn to shove me back, except his shove is gentler, only enough to secure himself some distance to breathe.
"I read it," he says kneading his back which will most likely bruise thanks to the earlier contact with the table.
"How dare you!" I spit at him again, clasping my hand around the collar of his shirt, my eyes raging with anger.
I felt betrayed. Gale was the second person that had read the letter. At least Peeta's mother had the decency to ask me for my permission before reading the damn letter. Gale had just authorized himself in my absence and read Peeta's words, whatever they may have been, and then hidden the letter from me.
"Katniss, stop!" Gale yells, wrapping his hand around my wrist, releasing his collar from my firm grasp.
"I read it Katniss… but I put it back in your jacket."
"Liar!" At this point, I am practically screaming at the top of my lungs. Gale was lying to me and I knew it. Letter's don't just grow feet and run away. Gale had read it, didn't like what it said and gotten rid of it.
"I'm not a liar," Gale says sternly taking a step towards me. "I don't know what happened to the letter… but if you ask me, I say I'm glad it's missing."
My eyes widen at his remark. I find myself tightening my right hand into a fist and I begin to swing it towards Gale's face when Prim's shriek echoes through the room, snapping me back to reality. My fist falls to my side, mid-swing as Gale stares back at me in disbelief.
"Katniss…" Prim sobs out in her soft voice, instantly putting me to shame.
I struggle to compose myself. "Little duck," I begin, but her next words throw me off completely.
"I'm so sorry Katniss… I…I'm the one that took the letter." Prim chokes out through her sobs.
I must look completely insane because one look at my face, Prim bursts into tears. So many emotions go through me I can't quite process them all. I'm shocked, I'm angry, I'm confused, I'm… on fire.
"I burned it… I burned it Katniss... I'm so sorry."
I had never felt such anger towards my sister. She was always an earthly embodiment of an angel, the light that flickered in the dark, the sweet, innocent, and kind little girl; my baby sister.
At this very moment, in this very second, I can't stomach the sight of her.
I burst out of my house slamming the door behind me.
I had spent hours walking around the district aimlessly. With nowhere to go and feeling betrayed by both my sister and my best friend, I am a complete mess.
Eventually I make my way back home and quietly slip through the front door. Mother has fallen asleep on the armchair that belonged to my father. I tiptoe over to her and place the worn grey blanket gently over her shoulders. Mother sometimes did this, falling asleep on the armchair that somehow after all these years, still managed to smell like father.
I debate whether to sleep in the living room with my mother, unsure whether I can face my sister just yet.
Just then I hear my sister's soft voice call out to me as she peeks around the corner.
I let out a soft sigh and let guilt wash over me. Just looking at Prim makes me realize that my reaction had hurt her greatly.
"Little duck…" I whisper inching closer to her as she hesitantly does the same.
"Katniss, I did something unforgivable," she begins her eyes already filling with tears.
"No Prim, I'm sor-" Prim abruptly cuts me off, frustration evident in her sweet little eyes.
"No! I had no right to read the letter and even worse, I destroyed it. I'm a horrible person."
I open my mouth to comfort my sister but she raises her voice tears flooding out of her soft blue eyes.
"I'm so sorry Katniss. I got scared. I remember the way mom disappeared right before our eyes when father died and I thought… I thought I would lose you just like how we lost her if something were to happen to Peeta." Her words filled with so many emotions, my eyes begin to cloud as well.
"I had no right to destroy the letter Katniss, please just yell at me, I deserve it, be mad! Now you'll never get to read for yourself Peeta's... Peeta's last words."
I rush to my sister and pull her frail body into a tight embrace. She nearly breaks apart in my arms, her body shaking uncontrollably as she sobs into my chest. I shush her, over and over, running my fingers through her golden blonde hair. She apologizes, repeatedly through each whimper and I can't help myself but to forgive her.
"I would never leave you little duck."
Peeta has become increasingly solemn as the days pass on by. With only five left in the arena, I was surprised at the lack of interference on behalf of the Capitol to finish the games and to declare the winner once and for all.
Rumors began to swarm in class and were confirmed by Madge whose father is the mayor of our district. The Capitol was furious with Peeta. He had yet to kill, or show any sign of cruelty or evil. He had managed to remain himself throughout the games, a kind and caring young man who felt compassion for everyone. Furthermore, his interaction with Avalyn and his effort to save Clove had begun some unsettling amongst the citizens of various districts. To add fuel to the fire the stunt with the beauty pills had enraged all twelve districts including some Capitol citizens although to a much lesser extent.
Days dragged on as the remaining tributes began to wither away. With each passing day food became harder to secure, and water was becoming scarce. I wondered if starvation was the technique the Capitol intended on using to eliminate them one by one.
On Thursday morning a knock on the door and a soft murmur wakes me. I slip out of the small bed I share with Prim, careful not to wake her and walk towards the front door. She was still shaken up over our little 'fight'. I had made sure to hold her close to my chest and sing to her every night to remind her that regardless of what she had done, I would always love her.
As I round the corner, I am surprised to see Mr. Mellark and my mother standing awkwardly by the door averting each others eyes.
"Why don't you come in James," mother gestures to the small kitchen table with a tiny smile, but Mr. Mellark declines with a shake of the head.
"No no…" he says taking a step back looking bewildered. "I'm sorry I…" he begins but fails to complete his train of thought. "I insist," my mother places a hand on his shoulders gently guiding him deeper into the house.
They both seem relieved to see me as I make myself visible from behind the door. My mother motions me to join them at the table and when I do, the silence continues to engulf the room.
Having Mr. Mellark in our house is foreign, but oddly comforting. I can see my mother's eyes fill with life masked with worry as she looks back and forth between her fingers and his face, searching desperately for the right thing to say.
"I was asked to bake for Peeta," Mr. Mellark begins gazing at his strong and calloused hands which rest knotted on the kitchen table.
A few moments later he continues, "Haymitch requested a fresh loaf of bread to be delivered with a message from home."
I had always known the baker to be a man of few words but his voice was so quit that my mother and I were both leaning towards him to catch his mumbling words.
"Haymitch thinks Peeta has a chance to win, and wants there to be a reminder that there is hope still left. The sponsors have agreed to summon enough funds to deliver a fresh loaf of bread and a message from home for him," Mr. Mellark clarifies sensing our confusion.
He sits erect in his chair and with no hesitation he turns my way and says, "Katniss, I want to ask you to write the message."
I must look absolutely stunned and puzzled because Mr. Mellark blinks a few times before averting his gaze back to his hands.
"I know how much Peeta lov-… adores you… and if there is any way that you can do me this favor. Please give him hope, I need my son back." And with that he bursts, like a dam that can no longer hold the water that pools behind its walls, he sobs into his hands, wails, his tears seeping through his fingers that now cover his face.
My mother and I sit idle, both unsure of what to do with this wailing man that occupies a seat at our kitchen table.
Mr. Mellark wants me to write a message to Peeta? I ask myself, confused. This may be his last opportunity for him to express his love and care for his son through words and he was giving this precious opportunity to me? I had only spoken to Peeta at the Bonfire, other than that we had dueled in various staring contests at school and at the bakery when I traded with his father. The only other interaction we had was the day he tossed that bread that saved my family's life.
Mr. Mellark suddenly stands up startling us all as the chair he occupied knocks back to the ground. He quickly apologizes, straightening the chair before placing the brown bag filled with breakfast rolls on the kitchen table.
"I'm so sorry," he whispers before rushing out the door ignoring my mother who repeatedly calls out to him.
I spend all morning debating whether or not to write a letter to him. With Peeta's letter burnt, I will never know his true feelings for me. I will never be able to read his words, never be able to see his handwriting, the curves of each letter, the structure of his sentences… I will never be able to decipher my emotions for him.
Was I really willing to let go of this chance? The one opportunity I have to express to him whatever emotion that is going through my heart at this very moment. I knew I felt something for him, something about him… and I knew that he had a special effect on me.
I rush into the bedroom, bursting through with such power that I practically break the fragile door off its rusty hinges. Prim shoots out of her sleep, frightened at the sight of me frantically rummaging through my school supplies.
I reach for my notebook and rip a piece of paper from it and immediately and without hesitation begin to write. It was brief, short, maybe even puzzling but I didn't care. At this moment, this is what I wanted to say to Peeta.
"Prim, get mom to walk you to school," I yell as I run out of my house towards the bakery.
I was frantic. I feared that perhaps I was late, maybe my letter would never get to him. The thought was so overwhelming I found myself practically sprinting towards the bakery.
I rush through the front door, knocking over the small bell that hangs on the front entrance of the bakery. Peeta's middle brother practically falls off the stool he occupies due to the loud sound of my sudden entrance.
Our eyes meet and he immediately understands why I had bulldozed into the bakery.
"Dad!" he yells to the back of the bakery as I rest my hand on my knees to catch my breath.
When Peeta's father steps around the counter and walks towards me, I stand up to meet his hopeful gaze.
"Is it too late?"
He shakes his head, his hands elbow deep in flour. I shove the folded piece of paper into his hand and I am taken back when Peeta's father yanks me into a warm embrace.
"Thank you… Thank you Katniss."
When the final bell rings that day, I bolt out of my seat and literally yank Prim out of her classroom and half carry, half drag her to the viewing square. Prim doesn't object, her guilt over the Peeta's letter still weighing down on her. She has repeatedly tried to tell me what the letter had said but I refused to hear it. I even went as far as covering my ears and shaking my head, perhaps a little childishly, when Prim attempted to disclose the content of the letter a few days ago.
"Why won't you let me tell you Katniss?" Prim had questioned, frustrated, tears pooling in her light blue eyes.
To be honest, I didn't have an answer for her. It didn't feel right to hear it from Prim, or Gale for that matter. He too had asked if I wanted to know what was written in the letter.
"Prim, I will only say this once so listen to me carefully."
She had stepped towards me, slightly hesitant sensing the all business tone in my voice. I knelt down in front of her, placing my hands on her shoulders and stared directly into her eyes.
"I am not mad at you… not anymore at least. I understand why you did what you did, you were afraid I was going to disappear like mom. The letter is gone and that's that."
"But…" Prim begins her lips forming a frown. I quickly interrupt her telling her that I don't want to hear it.
"Besides, if it was really important … he'll come back and he can say it to me in person."
The beeping of the silver parachute matches the sound of my pounding heart. I watch as it floats its way down to Peeta while he sits taking the first watch that evening.
Peeta makes his way over to the parcel as it lands on the soft green grass. He cautiously picks up the package and walks it back to Rei who is rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.
"What is it?" she inquires, curiosity lacing over her soft, sleepy brown orbs.
Peeta shrugs his shoulders, before cautiously inspecting the parcel. When he comes face to face with a fresh loaf of bread, Peeta lets out a sigh of relief, his eyes bubbling with tears.
Rei reaches for the bread and gently touches the end of the rectangular loaf with her hands. "It's still warm," she observes wiping her own tears.
"Go on," Peeta lifts his chin to Rei as she tears a small piece from the loaf and places it into her mouth. As soon as the warm bread passes her chapped lips, she covers her mouth with her hand as if afraid she may scream in delight.
"It's so good," Rei says chewing the small piece. Peeta soon takes a piece too, and can't help himself when his face lights up in pure joy.
"My dad made this," Peeta says wiping away his tear enjoying the taste of the bread. "None of us make it as good as he does," Peeta adds referring to himself and his older brothers.
They sit side by side in a comfortable silence, eating close to half of the loaf. They decide to store the rest for the morning, as surely food was only going to get further scarce.
Peeta reaches for the silver case to store the bread, and only then does he notice the small white envelope that holds my note.
He slowly removes it and reads my messy writing over and over, his eyes scanning the note in disbelief.
I'll never forgive you if you give up. Come back home. – Katniss
"She sounds like a bitch." Rei says peeking over Peeta's shoulder, reading the note.
Peeta shakes his head, finally smiling, snapping out of his initial shock.
"No," he begins his eyes scanning into the distance with a new found determination.
"She's just… perfect," and it's at that moment that I know I have given him the one thing that he gave me that rainy day outside the bakery after my father's death.
Hope.
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