JASON'S POV

I sat on the steps listening to Don and Mommy fighting.
The only thing I knew I did right was ate my french fry...
So I'm thinking maybe I'll do it again for Mommy, and she'll be proud of me.
Right now she saying that she doesn't mind if I live with her forever.
That's good because I plan to;and I don't care if Don doesn't like it.
Mommy is saying she wants me to be dependant on her for a long time yet...
I wonder what that means.
Maybe it means Mommy and Don will quit fighting over me.
The screen door swings open behind me.
I hear the squeaky hinges, and Mommy's light footsteps.
She's wear the neon yellow Nike shocks me and Don bought her for Christmas.
She looks very pretty today.
It kinda makes me jealous.
She's so normal and pretty, almost everyone loves Mommy.
Don has adoring fans that love him and I have no one but Mommy.
Mommy sits down swinging her legs over the edge of the porch, and letting
them dangle there.
She's really pretty in the sunlight; I know why Don loves her so much.
Does he love me too?
I hold back from asking.
Instead, I lean back on my hands and just ask the first thing that comes to
mind.
"Mommy? Why are we different?"
Mommy sighs.
"Jason we already discussed this..."
Mommy sighs again, but she sounds a little bit angry.
I'm only asking questions because I'm curious!
Why is that making her angry?
I hold my breath a minute before trying again.
"Why do I look like this? You don't. Did my,..." I swallow, "Real Daddy look
like this?"
I gesture to myself.
In my mind I don't want to admit it, but Don isn't my biologithical Daddy, or
whatever Don said.
Mommy looks like she's gonna cry really hard.
"Jason do you have to know about Elias yet? I mean, do we have to discuss
him?!"
I shake my head yes.
Mommy looks at me moment more before she begins to cry.
I can't stand seeing her tears streak her face;it makes it to shiny for my
taste.
Then again, maybe after I think about it, I have no room to talk, or critise
her because If I look in the mirror...I'd brake it.
"Mommy please don't cry!"
I can't stand it! I wanna cry too now.
I have to be strong for Mommy though, so instead I suck in my breath and hold
for ten seconds.
I let it out and start again.
Mommy's shoulders are shaking, this isn't good.
Even I, the retard, know that much.
"Mommy! We don't have to talk about him! I'm sorry!" I scream, hoping she'll
stop.
If Don sees this he'll hate me for sure.
She wipes her eyes on her sleeves.
I notice she's wearing an electric blue Ratt tee shirt.
"I like your shirt today Mommy."
I say conversationally, praying she'll stop sniffling.
She smiles weakly like she's broken or something.
It kind of scares me, more than the dark, or spiders, or water put together.
"Jason your Mommy's special, special boy. You know that right?"
I nod quickly.
She's always telling me that...It can be annoying after a while.
Mommy hugs me close.
She smells good, like misty rain.
I love the smell of rain on the lake.
Storms scare me though.
Mommy begins to talk again.
"If you know that, Why does what you look like matter? Me and Don don't
care..."
"But I do!" I snap harshly.
Mommy flinches; I need to tone it down.
"Alright then...Jason you have a disability okay?" Mommy barks.
I think I've hurt her feelings.
I didn't mean to.
I have to apologize and i know it.
"Does it mean I'm not as smart as other kids?"
I'm not sure I can call them kids...I'm a kid too, but what am I supoose to
say? Friends?!
I don't think so...I don't have any?
Mommy says that other people might not like me because I'm different.
I want to understand why just because I'm different no one likes me...
It dosn't make sense.
Don is in the doorway, I can see him out of the cornor of my not swollen
eye.
He's smiling at me and Mommy's backs.
It could be just her though, it was hard to tell sometimes.
"Mommy? Why do people hate anyone who's different than them?"
Mommy hesitates.
I swear, if she starts to cry again, I'm gonna lose it!
She answers again.
"Well, sweetie, It's human nature to...(She gulps)loathe, or make fun of
something, or someone, who, uh...goes against what is a set idea for a person
in someone's mind."
I knew she didn't want me to understand what she was saying, but I'm smarter
than that...
"So no one likes me because I'm..."
I'd never come to terms with the word before but...

"deformed?"

The air was oppresive and thick; it was hard to breath.
Mommy sat quite still for a second.

"Mommy?"

She spun around quickly, facing me.
She puts her hands on my shoulders and shakes me really hard.
It hurts.
"DON'T YOU EVER SAY THAT WORD! YOUR SPECIAL! DO YOU HEAR ME?! SPECIAL!"
I bite her arm and she lets go.
"YOUR HURTING ME MOMMY! DON SAYS SO! AND HE'S NEVER WRONG!!!EVER!" I scream
at my Mommy.
She's stunned beyond belief.
I jump off the edge of the porch and run to the garage and into a cornor Don
nor Mommy can reach.
"JASON!" Mommy yells fearfully giving chase.
I kick in high gear and barely make it into my little niche, before she
blocks it's exit/entrance.
"JASON!" She screams again.
I don't make a move.
She turns to look at the house.
"DON! I NEED YOU!"
I smile.
She doesn't know how much.
Don rushes out.
He looks shaken. Badly.

"Jason?"

His barely breathing right.
"Don I'm okay. Please make Mommy go away though...she hurt me."
I clutch my arm to my side cementing it there.
His eyes narrow.
"What do you mean 'hurt you'?"
I show him my arm and the painful brown, black,purple,blue, and yellow
splotches dotting my skin.
He gasps and stares at Mommy hatefully.
"PAM?!" He hissed.
Mommy looks at a loss.
It's kind of funny.
I need to see something funny my head hurts again.
Mommy doesn't think this funny at all.
I think she's going to cry again.
"Oh no."
It was to late she was crying and rambling.
What have I done to her?

I'm scared now. What's going on?

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End Chapter Notes: This chapter is written by Kira Duvane (SHE IS ROKKEN LIKE DOKKEN!) So give her full credit, I only added that little sentince at the end.

Kira, thanks so much. u r an awesome friend.