Here's the next chapter as promised for the weekend. Thanks to everyone for reading, and especially to those who have so kindly reviewed. I really appreciate the encouragement and feedback. Thanks as always to my talented and patient beta Prothrombintime.
Chapter 14
Jack had just finished changing his clothes and getting ready when the intercom buzzed at precisely seven o'clock. He'd fussed at length over his choice of attire for the evening, finally settling on black jeans and a deep blue, long-sleeved dress shirt, both of which he thought nicely accentuated his height and build. Glancing at himself once more in the bathroom mirror, and with one final tug at a wayward spike of uncooperative hair, he decided that he was as ready as he'd ever be.
A couple of minutes later, he opened his front door and watched as Ianto walked down the corridor towards him with a brown carrier bag clutched in one hand.
"Hey there," Jack said as Ianto reached his doorway.
He smiled at the Welshman but then felt a sharp twinge of guilt. It seemed wrong to be taking this moment of pleasure amidst the turmoil of everything else that was going on in his life. But despite his conflicted feelings, an undeniable rush of warmth spread through him from seeing the younger man again. "Come in," he added and moved aside to give Ianto access.
"Evening, Jack," Ianto greeted in return as he stepped gracefully across the threshold.
Jack closed the door and watched as Ianto settled the bag down on the floor. He removed his shoes and shrugged off his fitted black leather jacket, hanging it up neatly. Jack took a moment to gaze appreciatively over the younger man's appearance. A dark burgundy coloured shirt sat comfortably over Ianto's broad shoulders, framing the lean lines of his well-proportioned physique to perfection. The top two buttons were open, revealing a teasing glimpse of pale skin. The shirt was complimented by navy blue jeans, which hugged Ianto's hips perfectly, and the same studded leather belt from the day before.
With an almost shy smile, Ianto leaned in close to Jack and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. Jack was momentarily taken aback by the intimacy of the gesture, unsure of the protocol in this rather unusual situation – unusual for him, at least. While Jack wasn't a stickler for convention by any stretch of the imagination, everything with Ianto seemed to be happening a bit back to front. Mentally shrugging off his confusion, he instead concentrated on how nice Ianto's warm lips had felt against his own. He breathed in deeply as a hint of Ianto's masculine scent, as complex and alluring as the man himself, lingered in his nostrils.
"It's good to see you," Jack said softly, hoping to cover up any awkwardness on his part.
"You too," Ianto replied, his eyes warm as they gazed into Jack's. He picked up the bag again and jiggled it slightly. "I come bearing gifts."
"Really?" Jack said, feeling intrigued as he gestured for Ianto to follow him down the hallway and through to the kitchen.
"Yep," Ianto said with an impish grin as he placed the bag down on the bench-top and rummaged around inside it. "First, we have red wine," he said, extracting a bottle of merlot and passing it to Jack.
Jack glanced at the label before putting the bottle down. "Perfect," he said and nodded with approval.
"Next, we have pudding. Chocolate mud cake," Ianto continued, putting a white cardboard box down next to the wine. "It's good for the serotonin levels." He grinned teasingly at Jack. "And I know how much you like chocolate."
Jack felt an amused smile tug at the corners of his mouth as he lifted the lid of the box and sniffed at the rich aroma of dark chocolate appreciatively. "Mmm," he murmured, already looking forward to indulging in the decadent treat.
"But most importantly," Ianto finished as he removed the last three items from the bag – a cafetière, a compact burr grinder, and a generous sized bag of coffee beans – and set them down in front of Jack with a flourish. "Everything we need to make proper coffee."
"Wow. This is fantastic," Jack exclaimed, feeling a little awestruck. He was genuinely touched by Ianto's thoughtfulness. "You didn't have to go to so much trouble though," he added, suddenly feeling regretful for not putting as much effort into their evening together as Ianto had obviously done.
"No trouble," Ianto said lightly. "Besides, now I don't have to worry about what I'd be forced to do if you offered me instant again."
Jack growled good-naturedly. "Are you always this cheeky?"
Ianto shrugged. "Pretty much."
Jack's retort was cut off by the sound of the intercom again. "That should be dinner," he explained. "I thought about cooking something, but I didn't want to subject you to that. Not on our first… well not tonight. So I ordered Chinese instead." He looked at Ianto nervously. "Is that okay?"
"It's fine, Jack," Ianto replied with a reassuring smile.
"I'll just go down and grab it," Jack said hurriedly, patting his back pocket to make sure that he had his wallet. As an afterthought, he grabbed two glasses from one of the overhead cupboards and then retrieved a bottle opener from a nearby drawer, putting them down on the bench. "Do you want to open the wine?"
Ianto nodded, reaching for the bottle opener, while Jack walked to the door and proceeded down the hallway to collect their food.
Jack took a deep breath as he waited impatiently by the lift. The evening had only just begun, and he was already enjoying himself more than he had in what seemed like a very long time. He was determined to push everything aside, just for this one night. He had no idea what the coming days would bring, but at least he could enjoy their evening together, irrespective of what turns it might take along the way.
John's words echoed in his thoughts, telling him to find some happiness in the time he had left. And this one evening was probably as close to that as he was likely to get. John wouldn't have begrudged him that. He was sure of it, although he wasn't quite so sure if John would have approved of Jack becoming involved with his nephew. But Jack felt certain that John had loved them both, even if he and Ianto hadn't been close. He wanted to hope that John would have been happy for them to find some comfort with each other, even if only briefly.
Breathing out a heavy sigh, he decided that he really needed to stop torturing himself. Ianto wasn't an innocent youth who Jack was taking advantage of – he was a self-assured and confident man, and Jack certainly hadn't coerced him into anything. It was all quite bizarre when he stopped to think about it. He had probably ten years on Ianto, yet he was floundering around like a virginal teenager, while Ianto seemed to be entirely at ease.
With renewed determination, he pushed aside his doubts. Several minutes later, he'd greeted the delivery boy at the entrance of the building, paid for the food, and was walking back into the apartment with their dinner in hand.
Ianto's eyes grew wide as Jack dumped the enormous bag of food down on the bench and busied himself with retrieving plates and cutlery. "Er… Jack, how many other people have you invited over for dinner?" he asked with obvious amusement.
Jack looked at him in confusion, and then stopped to stare at the bag. He'd probably ordered four times more food than they could possibly eat between them. He chuckled a little. "I wasn't sure what you like, so I thought I'd get a selection."
Ianto smiled indulgently. "Well, on the plus side, you'll have enough leftovers to last you for a week."
"That's true," Jack acknowledged sheepishly, returning Ianto's smile.
Ianto helped him to move everything over to the glass coffee table in front of the sofa. He passed Jack his glass of wine as they both settled down next to each other. Jack took a mouthful of wine and hummed appreciatively as he allowed it to roll around in his mouth before swallowing it. "That's really good," he murmured.
Ianto took a sip too, and a wistful smile ghosted across his lips. "Mmm. It's one of my favourites," he stated softly. "I'm glad you like it."
Putting his glass down, Jack began unpacking the containers of food and was soon loading up a plate for Ianto, ignoring his protests about the quantity of food that Jack was serving him.
They ate in relative but comfortable silence, occasionally commenting on the food or making small talk about nothing in particular. Jack had spent a lot of time alone recently, and he was enjoying just sharing a quiet meal with someone outside of work. He wasn't feeling up to trying to be engaging or witty or entertaining, and Ianto didn't seem to mind in the least. While they didn't talk about John, Jack couldn't completely ignore the fact that the day after tomorrow, they would be attending his funeral.
It was a while later when Ianto pushed his plate onto the table with a satisfied sigh. Jack watched the younger man as he deftly topped up their glasses, emptying the bottle. He then settled back against the sofa, twirling the stem of the glass between his fingers before taking a generous sip. Ianto had eaten more than Jack had expected, but he noticed with amusement that various pieces of vegetables had been carefully pushed to one side of the otherwise empty plate.
"You didn't eat all your vegetables," Jack admonished teasingly.
Ianto pulled a face. "Please, Jack… don't get me started. I had to eat so many of them when I was little, I think I developed an aversion." He gave a dramatic shudder. "They're all right, but only in very small doses. Except for brussel sprouts. They're disgusting."
Jack chuckled and tried to imagine how a miniature Ianto Jones would have looked and acted. "Have some more fried rice then," he suggested and went to spoon some more onto Ianto's plate.
Ianto waved him off. "No, seriously, Jack, I'm stuffed. It was delicious though."
Jack relented and realising that he was full as well, he sealed up the containers that still had some food left in them. Pulling himself to his feet with a groan, he carried them over to the kitchen and jammed them into the refrigerator. Ianto had been absolutely right; he'd easily be able to get a few meals out of the leftovers.
He turned back and noticed that Ianto was watching him intently, his expression pensive. Then Ianto smiled at him, and smiling back, Jack returned to the sofa and sat down again. He rested his hand on Ianto's knee, giving it a gentle squeeze before pulling away and picking up his glass again.
Jack sipped slowly at the remainder of his wine, savouring the rich, mellow flavour as it played across his tongue. The combination of the wine, good food, and gentle companionship had imbrued him with a feeling of contentment that he'd thought was nothing more than a distant memory. He could almost allow himself to believe that his life wasn't the unending nightmare it had recently turned into.
Ianto gave him a gentle nudge, breaking his reverie, and gestured at the entertainment unit along the opposite wall. "Mind if I put some music on?"
Jack smiled and shook his head. He took another sip of wine and watched idly as Ianto padded over to the shelves containing Jack's music collection. After perusing it for a minute, he plucked out a disc. He switched on the player, inserted the disc, and adjusted the volume so the soft, languid music quietly enveloped the room. Jack closed his eyes and concentrated on the gentle melody and haunting vocals. Ianto had somehow managed to select one of his favourite songs.
Ianto moved to stand in front of Jack and tentatively reached out his hand. "Dance with me?"
Jack opened his eyes and looked up at Ianto in surprise, but he allowed himself to be pulled to his feet as he put his glass down on the table. "Um, I've never danced with a man before," he said, looking at Ianto doubtfully. "And I've kind of got two left feet."
Ianto gave him a gentle smile. "That's okay. I'll show you."
They moved over to the empty space by the window. Ianto wrapped his left arm around Jack's waist and pulling him close, entwined the fingers of their other hands together. He rested their joined hands against his chest. Ianto gave Jack another smile and took the lead, gently guiding Jack to follow his steps. After a few initial stumbles they settled into a slow, swaying rhythm.
Jack's senses were quickly overwhelmed by the closeness of Ianto's presence. Once again he felt an inexplicable sense of familiarity tingling elusively at the edges of his mind. The sensation was at once both comforting and unsettling, but he forced himself to push the feelings aside, reminding himself of his commitment to enjoy the evening.
As if sensing Jack's disquiet, Ianto pressed himself closer, and he eased his head forward so that their cheeks rubbed softly together.
Revelling in the pleasure of Ianto's smooth face pressed against his own, their bodies tightly intertwined, Jack found himself imagining a lifetime of moments like this. He sighed deeply. "I could get used to this."
Ianto pulled back to meet his eyes. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," Jack confirmed with a sad smile. "I just wish the timing had been different."
"I know," Ianto said, his voice tinged with regret. "We're here now though. That's what matters."
Jack nodded in agreement and attempted a reassuring smile, knowing that Ianto couldn't understand the full meaning behind his words.
Ianto looked at Jack intently, and an uncertain frown settled over his features. "Jack, I know we've only just met. But if you want this… us…" He trailed off awkwardly, and glanced away. But then he seemed to gather his resolve, and he looked into Jack's eyes again. "Well, for what it's worth, I want you to know I'm not going anywhere."
Jack's heart clenched with Ianto's sincerely spoken words. He pulled back slightly, looking away, not knowing how to respond.
"Unless, you don't…" Ianto began hesitantly.
"No," Jack replied hurriedly, inwardly cringing at the trace of hurt he'd heard in Ianto's voice. He looked back into Ianto's eyes and pulled him closer again. "No, it's not that. It's just…" He shook his head in frustration at his lack of eloquence. "Ianto, there are things you don't know about me."
Ianto shrugged, looking surprisingly unconcerned. "It's okay, Jack. You'll tell me when you're ready."
Jack nodded mutely. He wasn't ready to tell Ianto the truth, but he wanted to tell Ianto that it really wasn't okay, that nothing about this situation was all right, and that they could never really be anything, no matter how much they both wanted it. But with Ianto's solid warmth wrapped around him, making him feel protected, desired, and cared for, Jack found himself desperately wanting something real between them. He wanted it more than he'd wanted anything in a long time.
Pulling the younger man close to his chest, Jack buried his face against Ianto's neck, deeply breathing in his comforting scent. He didn't want Ianto to see the pain that he knew must have been written unmistakably across his face.
Ianto didn't say anything further. He pressed a tender kiss against Jack's temple, and held him close as they continued to dance.