A.N.- So here's the next update. I wanted to thank you all for all the support for this story. This was has been a whirlwind of a story and I thank you all sticking with me at this point.

He's my first mistake

"Is there a problem Maya?" Josh's boyish grin faded suddenly concern for her well-being. She had acted strangely since he walked through the door. It seemed almost as if she didn't want him there, but he was doing his best not to jump to conclusions. It could be something as simple as their actions this afternoon had shocked her and she still needed time to process everything, he would be one of the first one to admit that he needed to sort everything out in his mind.

She didn't know what would become of this, all she knew was she cared very much for both men standing in front of her. This was what Riley must have felt at the dance when she had to face Lucas and Charlie at the same time back in middle school; this was life's way of teaching her a lesson. She placed on a polite smile trying to mask the anger and fear rushing through her veins.

"No, I just have to talk to Farkle quickly." Her eyes jumped to the blue ones of the genius and they had their own private conversation. They had just shared a moment but that seemed tainted now that he had snuck behind her back to invite Josh over to look for Riley. They had already received a text from Lucas telling them that he had found Riley, searching just seemed pointless at this moment of time.

Josh's eyes watched as the two exchanged silent words just as confused as he was before. He had received the text from Farkle to help look for Riley and he was more than eager to help because he was concerned for her safety. Deep down, he wouldn't lie saying that he hadn't gotten the blonde out of his head since she had come to visit him earlier. They had gotten a little carried away with each other, but he chalked that up to the tension that had been lingering between them since they parted ways. The afternoon's events did leave to question where things stood between them, but he knew that they would talk about that when she was ready.

"But wouldn't it be better if"- Farkle didn't get to finish his statement as Maya grabbed his shirt and dragged him into the kitchen leaving the pair of their previous lovers behind.

"You went behind my back and brought him here?" She hissed through her teeth. He must have called him right before she had interrupted his video game that was the only way he would have shown up when he did.

Farkle held up his hands slightly fearful for her wrath. The genius had racked his brain over and over on why the blonde wouldn't want Josh's presence in the house and he still came up with no answers which seemed to be more common when it came to her.

"He deserved to know Maya. He is Riley's family, I had to tell him that she was missing, he deserved to know."

"Riley is fine. She's safe with Lucas. You knew how I felt"- Farkle cut her off before she could continue on her rage against him.

"Actually, I don't because you won't talk to any of us about it. So, tell me Maya how do you feel?" She seemed different in the last couple days, it seemed to originate from the night of the party.

"I feel like you knew I didn't want to see him and you called him anyway."

"To help Riley! I would do anything for her; I love her." Both girls had been in his life for as long as he could remember, he had faith in Lucas in his ability to return her, but he still knew that he needed to be there for his friend.

"You love us both equally," she retorted without a second thought, doubt started to creep in about if he favored Riley over her, after all he did go against her wishes.

"But I love you differently!" He sighed and she instantly knew that he meant as more than a friend. He had made a promise to love the girls equally and he had lived up to that promise until college and then he just found that he wanted to unravel the mystery that was Maya Hart. He did love Riley, like a sister. He would move mountains if he thought that it would help her in any way, that's the real reason he called Josh despite blonde's wishes. But his feelings for Maya had only grown since his sophomore year in college, she had let him more into Mayaville and he had so many questions.

"Oh." Her eyes lit up in surprise as the words, she knew from their kiss that there were some feelings there but she didn't know to what extent.

"How long?" This changed everything, if Farkle loved her in the way that he was claiming that meant that he returned the feelings that she had.

"Since last year," he mumbled as his cheeks grew hot and was paired with a light pink tint. He never imagined that he would have this conversation with her in a thousand years, but she hadn't shot him down, and they had kissed earlier was it possible that she had feelings for him too.

"A whole year," she ran her hand through her blonde hair. She didn't know how she could miss any signs, it's not like Farkle was all that subtle when it came to his flirting style. Even with his confession amidst her feelings for the genius were still new, that didn't change her mind of what needed to happen. He watched as an array of emotions splashed over her face.

"And you don't feel the same"- He answered for her, her eyes grew wide and she placed her hands on both sides of his shoulders.

"No, that's not it. I just"- Farkle was one of her best friends and the last thing she wanted was to hurt him, she would put someone through a wall who would do that for her Farkle.

"I have some things that I have to sort out in my own life before I move forward with anyone. There are feelings here between us, we can't deny that, but it wouldn't be fair for you if I acted on them now." He pushed his gaze to the floor again feeling a different flood of emotions.

"You must hate me," She wouldn't even blame him if he did, she just did what she always did, act without thinking and now the price to pay was steep. He reached out and placed his hand on her shoulders, her body jumping at his touch.

"Maya, I could never hate you," his smile warmed the room. His words still didn't ease the guilt she felt for hurting him.

"I told you that there was nothing you could do to make me not love you any less." It was a stranger concept to her that there was nothing that could deter him, at that point she knew that she would never deserve the genius in front of her, but life granted him in her life anyway. "Thanks Farkle," She leaned in and pressed a kiss against his cheek. She knew that if things would eventually progress with him that she would want to take things super slow, after all it seemed to work for Riley and Lucas. Maya managed to look over his should during the kiss and see a very uncomfortable Josh with Smackle staring him down.

"You left Josh alone with Smackle?" Panic started to race through her, Maya could only imagine the questions that she was asking him.

"You dragged me away, remember?" She didn't seem all that entertained by him teasing and she rushed past him to save Josh from any line of questioning Isadora offered him.

"Your facial structure, it's very symmetrical." The raven-haired beauty said squinted through her glasses trying to find a flaw in the Matthew boy. Josh now knew how bacteria felt under a microscope, and he didn't wish it upon them even if they couldn't feel.

"Thank you?" He offered not sure if the comment was a compliment or not, he assumed it would be but wouldn't a non-symmetrical face be more fascinating to stare at? He hadn't spent much time with Isadora compared to the others that his niece had befriended. It didn't take much observation to realize that she was head over heels for Dr. Turtleneck.

"Maya must protect you against all other suitors; otherwise someone might snatch you up dream boat." His face scrunched even more with confusion, did Smackle know about what occurred between Maya and him or was she simply making an educated guess?

"Maya, Suitors? I don't think that you understand"- He was only able to repeat a couple words his brain still trying to process.

"I think I understand perfectly, she and I had a bonding moment earlier and she was planning on talking to you when she was ready." Maya had talked about him to Smackle? His eyes glanced over to where Farkle and Maya were having what looks like a heated conversation. Even though he wasn't in ear shot he could tell apart from anger that there was some other tension between them. His brain wandered too wondering why Maya and Farkle never became an item. Ever since Lucas had stepped into his niece's life he had a gut feeling that Riley had found her Topanga, whether she realized it or not. The late-night talks that she would have with Riley would prove that, but Maya didn't have a guy like that in her life. With him and Maya, there always seemed like there was something that something standing in their way whether it be the age gape or the miscommunication. Farkle had stood beside her every step of the way to his knowledge, he must have seen how attractive she had grown to become, it was only natural for them to grow closer, but the question was where did that leave them?

Maya pushed Josh away from Smackle in order to get their privacy dragging him to another room near the front of the house. Once she knew that they were out of earshot she released his arm.

"Maya, what's going on, why was Smackle talking about finding me a mate?" Maya let out a groan, even if she was trying to help, only but in this case, it made everything worse.

"That's nothing, don't worry about it," his eyebrows furrowed together, what was she talking about.

"Maya," he cautioned. His number one priority was his niece, but he could tell that there was something bothering her. He watched her pace back and forth a habit that she had established when she was nervous. He reached out and grabbed her arm turning her to face him.

"I wanted to apologize." The words sounded easy as they left her mouth but she knew how big a step in the best direction into righting her wrongs. His blue eyes pierced hers as Josh started to wonder what exactly she was asking forgiveness for; the worst-case scenario was she was apologizing for what they had shared together a few hours ago.

"Maya," when the words left his lips his tone was different, gentle, and soft it made her knees grow weak right then and there. Her eyes widened when she realized what he was trying to communicate.

"No, I'm not talking about that." A deep blush grew rapidly about what she was referencing. She would never apologize for the heated moment that would be engrained her mind for many nights to come.

"That night at the party, I-I never should have acted like that. I was stupid and immature and I was acting like the child that you called me." Her head dropped because she hated admitting that he was right all along. His finger slipped under her chin and he lifted it until their vision reconnected.

"We were both to blame for the events that happened. You acted out, but I left you there in a dangerous situation." His fought back the need to puke at the thought of Maya being with someone else. It had kept him up for nights just thinking about anything that he could have done to change the outcome of the situation.

"Josh, I didn't sleep with him."

"What?" It felt like all the blood froze in his system simultaneously to his skin being on fire. He felt silly that the situation could have been resolved if they had simply talked to each other. All of his friends had advised him to just ignore her; it had caused him to delete her message before hearing her out.

Josh's fingers reached out and touched her check their hot breaths began to intermingle, he leaned in and closed the gap between them. It would be easy to give in, to let him kiss her senseless, but that's what the old her would do.

"Josh, I can't." His eyebrows narrowed in confusion as she pushed him away. It seemed that both of them had been waiting so long for their mistakes to be corrected and then they could be together; had he read the moment wrong? She closed her eyes for a brief second giving her the courage that she needed to continue.

"It's not what you think, it has not you"- her voice faded when she realized how much it sounded like an excuse.

"It's you?" He finished her statement all signs of happiness on his had disappeared. Everything had gotten tangled between everything with Josh and Farkle, for her to better herself she had to take a step back and take note of everything.

"Josh, I have been running from myself for a long time, and you deserve someone better, and I intend to get there, I'm just not there yet." She reached out her hand and touched his with remorse, she wished she didn't hurt him, she seemed to do that to everyone she loved.

"I understand." He said squeezing her hand trying to be supportive. It was hard to be so when it felt like they were always headed back to square one.

"Long game?" He asked trying to lighten the mood. Maya's lips tucked up, she didn't understand how he was so patient when it came to her, maybe that was what it meant to play the long game.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." The blonde didn't know what would happen in the future with either boy, but she knew that she was lucky to have both Farkle and Josh in her life, and she had to better herself for everyone that she loved. The two started to journey back to join the others when the door suddenly swung open to revealing her best friend who looked soaked from the rain with her hand intertwined with Lucas who wore a small smile. She had come home.

Riley suddenly became so uncomfortable with all the eyes drawn to her, but drew strength when Lucas reached out and gave her hand a squeeze; they would tackle this together. Her eyes narrowed in confusion at the sight of Josh who was in standing in Farkle' s home, and even though she just walked in she could tell that she missed something really important.

"Josh, what are you doing here?" What if they had reached out her parents, her face paled at the thought. Even though she was an adult, she never wanted to disappoint the two of them with the decisions that she made.

"Farkle told me that you were lost," his eyes drifted over to Lucas and only the edges of his lips crept up into a smile, "but it seems that you were in good hands." A wildfire of a blush rose on her cheeks under his words, was it possible that he knew? She had heard of the after-sex glow, but she always assumed it was a myth, but even if it was real she had been gone for several hours at this point.

"It was raining hard where we were at so we had to wait till it died down for safety reasons." Even with their hands being the only part of them being connected her skin was on fire from the memories of how his hands explored and worshiped every inch of her body.

"Well I'm glad that you're safe, now if you excuse me I think it's best for everyone involved if I head back home; got to meet up for Andrew, for a hockey game tonight." His eyes flickered over to Maya paralyzing her in her spot, no words were spoken, but a lot was said between them. She still didn't know how much time before the long game would finish, but she did know that life threw them together when she thought she would never see him again, and it could do it again once she had her priorities straight. She knew hope and love weren't just for suckers, her family and friends had proven that over her life, and maybe Josh would be a part of her future, but she would have to wait to find out. It was like Riley and Lucas had said it wasn't until the right moment of time when two people come together. Speaking of the lovebirds her eyes narrowed on her best friend, there was something different between them, but she just couldn't place it. She knew that Riley was here and that they needed to talk, because she couldn't work on her until she had the sound knowledge that her friendship with Riley was back to normal. She rushed over to Riley grabbed her free hand and their eyes connected.

"Bay window, bay window right now," there was a smile exchanged between the two of them as she looked back to Lucas who nudged her closer to her best friend. They released a giggle that started to echo through the house as the two ran up the stairs to the window that symbolized more than just a place to work out any conflict that they had, it was a place where a brunette and a blonde would have each other's backs no matter what life threw at them.

The giggling subsided once they had finished their race to the window, and neither of them knew what had caused the laughter to erupt in the first place. Maybe it was that they didn't want to address why they were mad at each other, they just wanted to be friends again. The two sat down on the bench and silence sat between them both figuring out in their own minds what words needed to be said.

"Maya"- Riley began, but the blonde didn't let her continue further. She knew that if she let her best friend speak then she would apologize, when this whole mess was her fault, as per usual.

"No Riley, I need to get this out. I haven't been acting like your friend. I was trying to run from my choices but then I remembered that I failed gym so," she broke up in a bittersweet smile at the remembrance of all the antics that she did to get out of running a mile.

"I remembered a very wise brunette told me once that I had to stand up and face the consequences even if I don't like what they happens."

"I said that?" Riley asked in confusion.

"It was actually your Dad," her eyes fell to the ground. It was part of the high school graduation speech that he gave her right before her freshman year of college. Mr. Matthews had stepped up and been one of the first people to believe in her, to see the potential and push her when she needed it. She was grateful that she had both Mr. Matthews and Shawn in her life to help direct and guide her; it was more than what most people had.

"Will you forgive me?" With the question posed to Riley she also silently searched for the will within her to forgive herself. She had started the path to fix the slightly broken road in front of her, she knew it wouldn't be easy, but with her friends and family supporting her it would be worth it. Riley reached out and pushed the golden locks behind Maya's ears.

"Of course," smiles were exchanged as the mood started to lighten the room, "but we have to promise no more secrets."

"No more secrets." Maya agreed her pinkey joining hers in a handshake. It wasn't until the words that were said that she released that meant she would have to come clean with her current situation in her love life. Maya adjusted her body so she was facing the brunette offering her full attention.

"Riley, there's something that you need to know." She ran her hands down her legs trying to sum up the courage.

"Josh and I, well we"- What was the best way to tell her that she slept with her Uncle?

"Are you going to be my Aunt?" Her big doe eyes managed to grow even bigger at the half confession. Things with Josh were too complicated to answer that, so she just put on a smile. Maybe she wouldn't have to know all the details, she wasn't sure she would want to if it was about Riley and Lucas.

"I don't know," It was as honest as she could be in the moment. She didn't know what would happen even a year from now.

"Who know with the long game, I mean for all I know I could end up with Farkle." The idea seemed to elude her; she knew that he would take care of her financially while also supporting her in whatever she set out to do. He had asked her to marry him twice in her life, but maybe if he were to eventually ask again she would say yes. What was so wrong with wanting a happy life where she was loved, protected and cared for?

"Farkle?" A small chuckle escaped the brunette's lips, causing Maya's eyebrows to scrunch together.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, I just- It's Farkle you know? He's been with us our whole life. You would think if you two were meant to be together the Universe would bring you two together by now." She noticed that her best friend's lips dipped into a frown at her response. Riley's nose scrunched up, she must have missed something while she was away, but she could tell the unease from the blonde, so she wasn't going to push her further.

"Maya, I have something to tell you too." Maya had shared a bit of her love life; it was only fair to open up a little on her end. She was slightly afraid of what her best friend would do to her boyfriend if she found out what had happened between them.

"Lucas and I are together. It all happened so fast, and we kind of got swept up in our feelings and we just let go," the color on her cheeks had reddened to a shade that would match a tomato.

"That's not really a secret Riles, we saw you two walk through the door. I have to say I'm happy for you two, it took you two long enough to be together." She did ponder why Riley was acting so shy on the manner; it wasn't necessarily a secret that the two had been making out around the house. The sight made her want to pour a smoothie over the lovebirds to cool them off, but knowing them they might enjoy it.

Isadora's eyes never wavered from Farkle as the two girls ran upstairs leaving the two alone, but at the current moment she didn't know how she felt. It seemed like everything was coming together for Riley and Maya's love life, but it didn't seem like Farkle was all that happy. She didn't know if it was due to her presence since he had been distant ever since she had arrived despite her advances towards the genius. She didn't expect to win him back completely within her short amount of time at the house, but she would have thought that she would have made more progress. She reached out her and placed her hand on his shoulder and it pained her to watch him flinch under her touch. It was almost as if they were too damaged to try their relationship again.

"Farkle, what's the matter?" She just wished that he would be open and communicate with her. They used to be able to talk about how they were feeling, lately it seemed like they just hit a wall.

"I don't want to talk about it, ok?" He snapped this time the tone causing her to react.

"You're upset," It was a simple observation that spoke volumes. "Was it something that I?"

"No Isadora, it's not you," he huffed. "Can we just drop this, please?" The last thing he wanted was to talk about this especially with her. He started to walk away signaling the end of the conversation until Isadora stopped him.

"Is it Maya?"

"That doesn't matter." He allowed his eyes to drift to the stairs where Maya had run up to repair her friendship with her best friend, and then it lingered for just too long. "I love her possibly more than she'll ever know, but it's not time for us yet."

"What about us Farkle, do you see us ever getting a chance to start over?" She didn't know she much was riding on a question, but she could have sworn that she subconsciously holding her breath, and but the look on his face her chances weren't good.

"I don't know," he answered. He knew that if he didn't answer honestly that it would cause more pain for both in the long run. "You really hurt me Izzy." She would half smile at the account of him using her nickname, but the circumstances seemed less than pleasant.

"So just because I made one mistake, that means that we could never rekindle what we had?"

"You gave up on us Smackle!" He threw his hands up in frustration. "Things got hard and then you immediately started going to Theo?!"

"But I didn't cheat on you, doesn't that mean anything?" Tears started streaming down her face, she felt so foolish to even show up at the house. Even when she was with Theo, she still though of Farkle in the deepest corners of her mind.

"You may as well have." His voice had been void of all positive emotions and she started to give up hope. She was just looking for a sign that she was wrong, that this was just a bad dream and she would wake up back to reality.

"I'm fighting for you now!"

"That's just it Isadora, it's too late."

"Does any part of you still love me?" If there was no chance for them then she would need to reevaluate the future and where she belonged.

"I think a small part of me will always love you Smackle, but I just can't do this right now." Smackle's eyes hit the floor where she was sure that her heart lay in a thousand pieces.

"I see." She pushed her hair behind her ear making sure that she wouldn't have a complete breakdown in front her former love.

"Well I'll leave you alone, and you won't have to worry about me." She turned and was the one to walk away towards her room leaving Farkle behind wondering if he just did the right thing.

A.N.- Hides in the corner. I know that was a ton of feels in one chapter and that was probably the worst of it in the story. So congratulations, you survived. I know and fully expecting some backlash for this chapter, but as Maya's story progressed it was evident that she wasn't in the right head space to date anyone at the moment. I hope you all will let me know how you feel with this chapter. Till next time.