For Eternity Chapter 14: Edward's Story Pt 1, a twilight fanfic

A/N: Hello my lovelies! Happy Sunday to you all! As promised a weekly update, okay so I'm off by over a day, lol. But you won't hold it against me right? Anyhow I really do hope this chapter was worth the wait. I'm sure you noticed the title says part one. Yes, this chappie is a two parter. I wanted to leave you all hanging in suspense at the end, :) I hope that Edward's story is what you all anticipated, it was pretty difficult for me to think of it when I had months ago. I thought of changing it but one, I'm too lazy and drew blanks on another idea and two, I like it. Well not like it, cause its tragic, but you get what I mean. Anyway, enough babbling for now. On to the usual thank you's for all the wonderful reviews, pm's, adding this story to your favorites, alerts list, moi being your fav author, etc. It really makes me all warm inside ;) Okay, now on with it, by the way, intense stuff ahead and of course a little lemons! Chat with you at the end!

Chapter 14: Edward's Story Part 1

The agony engraved on Edward's face and eyes was so staggering, it nearly brought me to tears. Dammit, why did I bring it up? Hasn't he been through enough? His eyes slipped closed, his lips creasing into a thin line and every inch of his upper body strained greatly as he twisted his back to me again. I granted my eyes to wander up and down, examining every part of his divine frame. Starting from the back of his silky, copper tinted hair, to his formed shoulders, his ripped, muscular back that displayed beautifully and lastly, his... ass. Oh. My. God. Suddenly to my own accord, my mind zoned out, submitting a vivid daydream. Edward sprinting over to where I'm seated on the bed, his moves graceful, reflecting a ravenous lion that's closing in on it's prey. Then using great aggression and unadulterated animal lust, he shreds the clothes off my body using his strong, ice cold hands. After, hovering over me, his body weight forcing me to lay down on top of the mattress, as he aligns perfectly between my parted thighs and my eyes didn't miss that he's Au natural.

His illustrious body sings to me and my insides spark to life from the skin to skin contact. His lips would meet mine softly, seductively and I would eagerly match his sensual sweet kiss with hot, eager lips. But then I'd push the envelope, granting him to taste my tongue while he kisses lengthy, hard and ravenously, causing me to almost lose breath as a result. Meanwhile, his long, thick, creamy white member rests over the tip of my core, teasing it tortuously and I jerk my hips in reaction while flashing a passionate, pleading look which reads; I want him and need all of him so desperately. He then whispers my name, his voice laced with such love, devotion and passion my eyes react, tearing up lightly. Just as my lips separate and a soft moan evades, Edward would murmur, "I love you my Angel." in Italian or whatever damn language, doesn't matter since it sounds unbelievably sexy.

I echo back the same sentiment, then groan his name breathlessly as our lips heatedly connect once more. While our lips move with such wild abandon, his stone hands grip under my thighs roughly, then directing my legs to circle over his lower back. Our kissing gradually slows just as his granite erection slowly enters inside my soaked, wet sex. I gently disconnect my mouth off of his, to gaze attentively into those heavenly golden eyes of his that are brimmed with love, affection and arousal. His creamy white lids are hooded and pure feral lust is expressed on his face, my breathing hitches while returning the look as my heart races deafeningly against my heaving chest. My core muscles would then squeeze and release, allowing wetness to seep out, gently flowing like a river.

"Edward." I whimper, throwing him a imploring, dire gaze.

God, the way his fuckin frigid flesh feels inside my warmth, is causing my head to spin and my entire insides to insanely numb. His shaft pulsates rapidly at the peek of my entrance, mocking me yet again, taking his sweet time to enter further inside. Edward's mouth twitches into that crooked grin of his, his eyes brightening, expressing arousal and mischievousness. My labored breathing encompasses the soundless space and I moaned fervidly the second his granite member started to sluggishly insert inside my soaked, aching center.

"I will make you mine." he vowed, his voice sultry yet dark. I gasped, then cried out, my hands stiffly grabbing a hold of the bed comforter as my eyes watch in sheer anticipation when he guides his shaft further inside.

Gentle, lustful pants caught me off guard, breaking my mind out of the deep reverie I was in. Holy shit, that was madly graphic, wait, that was real, wasn't it? Didn't that just happen? Obviously not as I'm still seated on this bed like an absolute fuckin moron, staring off into space, while the man I love is on the verge of a panic attack. Is it conceivable for vampires to experience one of those? Do you just want to sit there and stupidly watch Swan, or do you actually want to help the guy out? Christ Bella, really you are all kinds of messed up, such inappropriate timing to be thinking this way, dont you think? I shook my head repeatedly to halt my talkative brain, then carefully slid out of the bed. After inhaling deeply and releasing out slowly, I tentatively paced over to where Edward's positioned. But abruptly stopping when discovering his edgy state hasn't subsided, if anything, it increased times fifty. His muscles appeared more intimidating as they protruded against the thin fabric of his stylish shirt and his hands were now balled into airtight fists by his sides, leaving his knuckles to nearly break through the barrier of his flesh.

The vision of it alone made me flinch internally and for a fraction of a second I considered the option to take a step back, but of course, was unable to. The resentment, aggravation I'm still harboring towards him involving his deception and secrecy, takes a back burner to what's happening presently. My god, look at him, he's like a scared little boy. One who had lost his parents in a tragic accident and his own life as well, to a... My brain unexpectedly displayed graphic images of Edward's limp, horrifically injured body laying there at the scene of the accident as he takes his final breath. Then out of nowhere, a psychotic, vampire freak passes by, discovers him and drains every drop of rust within Edward's flesh. The thought of it truly makes me, there are no words. My blood stewed rapidly and it was unbearably challenging to fight back the steaming wetness from spilling over. After exhaling softly, calmly, I trained my attention back to Edward and right away feeling determined to help him through this. I couldn't help but wonder though, while taking cautious steps over in his direction, did he really bury all his memories and emotions deep in the back of his mind for all these years? Oh how there are numerous questions that still remain unanswered and a great deal more that needs to be revealed.

"Bella," he whispered in such a broken voice my ears strained to listen.

My heart immediately shattered into several tiny fragments the second my eyes locked on his, after he slowly turned to face me. Damaged, gut wrenching distress was clearly written on his beautiful face, while his eyes glistened with suspended tears that appeared reluctant to fall. Hold up, vampires can't cry? Am I just over analyzing again or has my imagination once more gone into overdrive? No, you may be right on this theory. There are tears evidently present but for whatever unknown reason, they're refusing to flow over. Judging from Edward's anguish stricken reflection, it doesn't appear like he's trying to delay them. God, that's so... odd and yet so tragic, baring a physical trait such as that. Honestly I haven't the faintest clue what to make of this discovery. Think about it for a second Bella, this really shouldn't come as a surprise. His heart no longer beats, he's deceased in every sense of the word, so it would make exact sense that his tear ducts are no longer functional. True but still, he's alive in my book, very much so, in every way that counts. I made a mental note about this latest discovery and filed it in the part of my brain titled: Questions to Ask Eddie About Being a Vampire File, waiting for a more appropriate time to ask him.

"I'm not sure how to, where to begin. It's been so long since I verbally spoke about it and-" Edward stammered, his velvet voice etched with such grief, my chest reacted by constricting distressingly.

My teeth glided back and forth over my lower lip's skin repeatedly, another effort to fight back the damn tears that persistently wanted to escape.

"It's all right Edward, you can tell me."

I paced a couple of more steps, halting when my chest brushed against his lower abdomen, then while tiptoeing, I inclined my head to eye him directly. My hands lightly trembled as they raised up, then pressed over his icy, marble cheeks. He hummed automatically from my caress, leaning his face deeper onto my warm, tender palms. My heart beat accelerated over the harmonious contact while butterflies twirled gracefully in the pit of my stomach. I seized a brief moment to inhale his pleasing, lovely scent and it flooded my lungs generously. Edward's stunning orbs captured my attention, as usual I succumbed, permitting them to bewitch and imprison my heart and soul once again.

"You're so extraordinarily warm." he noted, his tone delicate and etched with admiration. I sighed contently as my thumbs stroked the apples of his frigid cheeks.

"I don't know if I'll ever get used to you being this way. So cold and just, it's-"

And there it goes, right on cue, the steamy moisture that was so anxious to escape, fell, traveling past my cheeks but before landing on my chin they were intercepted by Edward's supple lips and silky tongue. After, he planted gentle kisses on each side of my face then lapped the lukewarm skin, catching the wetness. In the heat of the moment, our mouths joined, motioning slowly and gingerly. I moaned quietly, reveling the incredible feel of his tasty, soft flesh but then the euphoric minute came to an unexpected end, when he broke free from the kiss. My lids fluttered open allowing my eyes a view of my surroundings, Edward's posture and features appeared stiff once again and my heart caught in my throat over the visual. I shamelessly admired him from head to toe, noting the shocking way he depicted a statue, unmoving and exhibiting no emotion. His eyes were closed, his lips in a firm thin line and his seraphic face contorted to a deep, tormented mask. His breathing sharp and heavy but thankfully he didn't remove my hands off his cheeks. I took a deep, steady exhale while moving my hands to gently explore the rest of his face, ceasing at his unruly hair.

A gentle etched moan freed past my throat, while exploring every strand of hair possible with my small fingers. Christ, his hair is even sexier and exquisite then it was when he was hum- I didn't care to finish the thought, opting to proceed the journey of caressing his hair and enjoying the way his gorgeous mouth parted when a groan released after each touch. My hands continued working their magic and somehow along the way, discovered myself crushing against him, joining our bodies in an intimate, heated position. His formed, muscular arms snaked around my waist and I snuggled deeper, pressing tighter, determined to unite us in a perfect embrace. The familiarity of all this spoke volumes as my mind recalled the few handful of times we held each other this way and sorrow constricted in my throat over the memories.

Minutes or several hours passed by it seemed as we clenched onto the other tenderly yet firmly, none of willing to separate. Eventually my combing of his hair stopped, as I opted to rest my arms around his shoulders, then tucking my head under the crook of his neck. A portion of me, the wishful thinking one, yearned to hear his once beating heart. However, listening to his quiet, melodic exhales is a perfect replacement. Edward soundly inhaled as his nose brushed across the peak of my head and his delightful breath engulfed my lungs. Sweet lord his flawless, beautiful body feels so extraordinary against mine. We fit perfectly, beautifully as if our torsos were specifically designed to mold only for each other. The outside world became a distant memory and we were the only ones remaining, lost in our loving, sentimental embrace. Suddenly, my body surrendered to the blissful slumber it so desperately wants to be in. My eyes tightly shutting but then pried wide open when a voice murmured,

"I awoke that morning in the best mood I've ever been in, like a big weight had been lifted off my shoulders."

Immediately my head snapped up and my doe brows fixed on Edward's grave amber's as a wistful expression creased his face. He carefully unwrapped us from our secure hold and I prevented back the frown that almost wrinkled my lips. He gazed at me attentively with a mixture of emotions written on his face. My heart beat drummed irregularly more and more by the second and the air in my lungs tightened, causing me to feel suffocated as a result. Waves of nerves settled right in the pits of my abdomen and no matter how hard I tried to calm them, it fought back forcefully. I closed my eyes for the briefest of moments, then released out a slow, deep exhale and just when the anxiousness was so close to drifting away, Edward's smooth tone captured my attention.

"After our conversation and the kisses we shared the previous evening, I had a good idea about where things stood between us, what we desired for our future together." Edward released a grave filled sigh and my chest automatically strained painfully over the heartbreaking sound.

He then rapidly and smoothly perched himself on the edge of bed, sitting in a tense position with slouched shoulders. His long legs stretched out across and I was in awe over the length and definition to them. I twisted halfway then strolled over to him, ceasing once there was a few inches gap between us. I assessed him longingly, wishing to touch him soothingly, console him by combing through his tousled locks again or stroke his cheeks, then cup them with the palms of my hands. But unfortunately my body was reluctant to move, forcing my feet to firmly rest, leaving me no other option but to observe him.

Edward utilizing human speed, slowly rested his arms over his knees then in a blur like manner, scratched the back of his head with his elegant, pretty fingers. Thankfully, Edward's voice distracted my mind from obsessing over his angelic, unbelievable beauty.

"I remember having no idea what I wanted to do after scraping the plan to attend NYU. Since choosing to attend school in Seattle instead, that way I would be nearby, for you." His topaz orbs slowly flickered upward to gaze deep into my guilt etched eyes. I matched his stare, giving him a wistful, tender look while nodding my head, silently encouraging him to proceed.

Edward frowned woefully, his facial expression switching to a neutral one as he glared directly at the wall to the left of him. Meanwhile I examined his face, admiring his out worldly beauty, then navigated my eyes up and down, searching for more of those crescent shaped marks such as the one that's tattooed on his wrist. However, my investigating was stopped short before it even started, when Edward's gentle, musical voice summoned me to give him my undivided attention once again.

"I already informed my father about my change of plans on graduation night. The ones that weren't suitable for the life he had outlined for me." Edward's voice almost broke then quickly recovered, switching back to it's previous monotone.

Suddenly his lips twisted into an intimidating snarl, revealing his brilliant white teeth. They were gritting so roughly, I feared that they may shatter in half without warning. His jaw rigidly set as if engraved from marble and his hands rolled up into closed fists and rested over his knees. It was becoming quite impossible to just stand there and not sit next to him, console him in hopes it would bring him back to somewhat of a better state of mind. Because quite frankly, this simmering anger that's almost erupting out of him, is scaring the shit out of me. Edward sighed remorsefully, turning his head to face me. Once detecting the panic and worry that my eyes and face expressed, he flashed an apologetic smile.

"I smell your fear mio angelo. I'm all right, promise, come here." He patted the vacant space next to him, his buttery pools wordlessly pleading me to join him.

Hesitantly, my feet directed the way over to the edge of the bed, then seated a few spaces away, all though I longed to be much closer. As if he suddenly had the ability to read my thoughts, Edward carefully turned me to face him, then gingerly lifted my body and set me down on his lap. My heart and insides instantly livened the second his icy body and my warm one attached in a loving hold, while the intense emotions I'm harboring left me on the verge of tears. He carefully placed his large, cool hands over mine then intertwined our fingers as his eyes fixed on my questioning and uneasy ones.

His liquid pools enticed me in, capturing my heart, soul, hypnotizing me and taking my breath away. But then my heart rate increased, panic constricting my throat as a bundle of nerves pressed against my chest so fiercely, it was impossible to ignore. His frigid, granite hands soothingly brushed my shaky fingers and though his touch felt wonderful like always, it didn't quite settle down the anxiousness that plagued my entire being. Edward then angled over, stopping just when there was a minimal gap between our faces. My head automatically swirled, a natural reaction when my nose captured a deep inhale of his aromatic scent.

"Bella," he whispered, evident anguish and sadness in his lovely voice.

Our eyes held their intense gaze and with perked ears, I was ready to listen attentively to every word. Edward suddenly withdrew his left hand off of mine to tenderly stroke a loose strand of hair that dangled over my right eye. Then delicately moved it, tucking it behind my right ear and after threw a serious, warning glare that made my heart leap straight to the middle of my throat.

"Everything that I'm about to share will without a doubt, impact you. We can't go back from here Isabella. Only forward, you understand?"

His eyes reflected heart wrenching pain and amazingly, I deciphered the expression he presented, which interpreted he was hesitant in proceeding, hoping I wanted to opt out from listening. For his sake I wanted more then anything to stop him before he even started. I don't want him to relive what he went through that morning all over again, just like I'm positive he doesn't. But the reality is, this needs to be finally shared, no matter how much it will ache to hear or for him to speak of it after so many years. After nodding my head once and giving him another reassuring look, Edward sighed softly, then murmured in a strained, low voice,

"My father refused to acknowledge my existence for days following graduation. As you recall I'm certain." He threw a knowing glare my way and I returned it with a sorrowful nod.

The burning, torturous weight on my chest doubled with each passing second and I only heard the very beginning of the tale. Keep it together Swan! Christ, he needs you now more then ever, the last thing you should do is fall apart, be strong, stop being fuckin selfish for once! You owe him, you owe him a great deal. After discreetly shutting my lids briefly and releasing a quiet exhale, I pushed all my endless ponders to the very back of my mind, then waited patiently for him to continue.

"All though he wouldn't attempt to have an open mind and actually pay attention to what I was voicing, I wasn't going to let that stop me from finally getting what I longed for. Finally embracing the dream that turned into a reality." Edward immediately stared at me pensively and my heart automatically lowered, sinking down all the way to my toes. I was all too aware what he meant by that cryptic statement and the magnitude of guilt that slammed fiercely against my chest, was staggering.

He placed his silky hand against my right cheek, just barely making contact with my flushed and tingled skin, handling it like it's a piece of delicate glass. Instinctively I leaned into his arctic palm while inhaling his dulcet aroma and it satiated my lungs and chest generously. The way his frigid, stone flesh feels against my heated, soft one as it awakens every cell of my body and brings it to a state of rapturous intoxication.

"You Bella," Edward murmured affectionately. His voice laced with such pure love, my heart instantly reacted, hammering in a steady yet tense rhythm against my ribs. "You were my dream." He breathed out shakily, stroking my cheek lovingly with the back of his granite fingertips.

"Edward, I," I stammered, my tone thick and etched with emotion, suddenly at a loss for words.

Honestly, what else can I say other then how sorry I am? I'll never forgive myself as long as I'm still breathing regarding all the agony I put him through. I will eternally regret not acknowledging the true feelings I bared for him all those years ago, for foolishly denying it and wasting so much precious time as a result. But now here we are, reunited after almost seven years, years that I thought he was deceased, years we're unable to claim back, which is so heartbreaking come to think of it. I have to stop comprehending over the what if's? Because, damn, a once in a lifetime opportunity is being presented to me, no matter how I'm unworthy of it. A second chance is being offered to the both of us. I for one, would be a fool not to embrace it, to seize it.

The real question at this rate is, will Edward want to take a risk with his heart again? Does he see the possibility for us to finally have a future together, the one we dreamed of, once upon a time? What are you insane? Of course he will risk it all once again in order to have a real shot of happiness with you. Amazingly, even after all the fuckin pain you've caused, he still wants and loves you, hasn't he made that evidently clear? All of a sudden, emptiness invaded my insides like a deep, intimate bond had been broken and it quickly registered why, Edward pulled away from our warm, comfortable nearness. I held back a disappointed sigh but shoved aside my inner pity party to train in on the words that slipped out of his lips next,

"As I said before, the day was beginning to appear exceptionally well, something I hadn't experienced much in my mortal life." Edward chuckled bitterly, his face expressing somberness while his eyes darkened significantly.

He captured my hand in his again and I reveled over it's cold and polished texture. Out of my own control, my mind pondered about how sitting on his lap was like resting on a magnificent statue, it's astoundingly surreal. My eyes observed his face, soaking in each detail as he switched expressions every few seconds or how his brows crinkled together when he was lost deep in thought. He seemed to tense the longer I stared and it pained me that it bothered him, so I decided to give him just the slightest caress. But just as my finger pad ghosted his translucent skin, his voice startled me, snapping the dense trance I was under.

"I was just about to phone you to make plans for the day when my mother stormed inside my room. And even now, several years later, I'll never forget the look upon her face and eyes. She appeared utterly distressed and it wasn't necessary for her to elaborate on what I already suspected. Naturally it was about my father and judging from the terrified look in her eyes, it could only mean one thing. He was on the verge of having one of his erratic episodes." Edward's face settled on a furious and heartbroken expression. My heart clenched over the view while dawning nerves crawled up my spine.

"My Mother informed that we were going out for a short while, no questions asked and simply explaining that my Father wanted to go for a drive. But of course being the typical teenager, I thought they just wanted to ruin my day. So I calmly told her I already had something going and that I would spend time with them later on. But my mom ignored my protests, continuing to look terrified, lost in her deep state of, well, where ever she was in her mind. Suddenly her unsteady breathing caught me completely off guard and she walked over to me where I was seated on the edge of my bed. She then cupped my face with her small, cool hands, gazing intently into my eyes and all though some of my human life's memories are fuzzy and distorted, I recall the fear etched on her beautiful face like it was yesterday."

Edward cut short to inhale sharply, then averted his amber orbs on my face the instant he picked up my puzzled expression. Based on what he stated, vampires lose their mortal memories when they're turned. Well that sucks but at the same time it's fascinating and I really want to know why that happens, if there is a reason. Once more he astonishingly read me well, figuring out my silent question and then clarified,

"When we're turned, our human memories become very faint. But in my case, I recollect nearly every detail of that morning right until the accident and after. It's simply unheard of for one of our kind to remember so much of their mortal life."

Edward's lips were in a thin line as his eyebrows raised, throwing a "do you understand" look. I didn't want to delay him from sharing his story any further, so I nodded reassuringly trying to maintain a neutral mask. Which of course he didn't buy since I'm apparently that damn decipherable.

"I'll explain more regarding that topic later, my love."

I shot him a thankful glare and the corners of his mouth curled up, displaying a near half smile which was short lived and replaced by a frown. Edward inhaled deeply and from the split second serene expression on his face, I had a feeling that he had helped himself to a lungful of my potent, tempting aroma. I smiled timidly, subtly informing him that I was aware of his actions and he grinned sheepishly, then whispered under his breath,

"Semplicemente bella."

Oh good gracious, he's speaking in Italian again. Does he even realize what that does to me? The magnitude effect it has on my heart. I blushed in response lowering my eyes and a slight chuckle erupted out of his mouth, then it was my turn to greedily inhale. He laughed once more, the sounds like a peaceful, romantic melody. I didn't realize I was under another deep spell, no thanks to him, until cool fingers glided across my jawline and my breath hitched over the heart stopping caress. Bella, get a grip woman! At this rate it will be sunrise by the time he finishes telling his story. Right, dammit. Seriously, this dazzling thing he has going is quite remarkable and a little bit annoying. Oh, who am I kidding, it's anything but. Thankfully, Edward cleared his throat, bringing me back to earth and I flickered my gaze over to him, analyzing him carefully as he proceeded onward, picking right up where he left last.

"I asked my mother if my father had been drinking. She vehemently tried to deny it but the answer was unmistakable in her eyes and on her face. I remember stalking angrily out of my room, charging down the steps, looking for my father. Once I found him I demanded that he hand me over the car keys, suggesting for myself to drive instead. But he unheeded my request, treating me like I was gum on the bottom of his shoe. Then foolishly, I flat out stated that I refuse to go anywhere with him until he sobers up. That was the final straw, what broke him out of his drunken state just long enough to acknowledge me. He crossed over to me, leaving no space between us and replied in a eerily steady yet dark voice,

'"You will go Edward, we will have a family breakfast and discussion." '

"The steely, grave look his eyes projected was enough to make me squirm, feel worthless as I always did for most of my human existence. Before long, my mother and I agreed to participate in something that we were both very unwilling to. I just knew nothing good would come out of my father's plans. Especially when he was-"

Edward trailed off, squeezing his eyelids firmly closed and his entire frame tensed again, so much so it became slightly painful to sit on his lap. His mouth set in a grim line, his jaw taut rigidly and his nostrils flared. I choked on an aching sob while my heart ripped over the torment that's rolling off of him in massive waves. I sucked in a slow, deep breath to simmer down the umpteenth amount of emotions that are invading my mind and it helped fairly, until Edward spoke again.

"If I had known that day would have been the last I ever spent with my parents, I would have said, would have-" He murmured. His voice laced with such gut wrenching suffering, I acted upon instinct, tentatively directing my free hand over to his gorgeous hair and gliding across the top soothingly.

"It's okay." I whispered comfortingly, "Edward, it's, I mean, um,"

I stopped short when recognizing how insensitive I must sound. I mean, shit, telling him its okay, seriously Bella? How is it okay that his parents were brutally killed in a car accident and Edward scarcely survived to tell the tale? How is any of that fuckin okay? Unexpectedly fiery tears covered my eyes to my dismay and I chewed on my lower lip roughly to prevent them from slipping. Edward hummed complacently in response to my tender combing of his hair and I found comfort in my ability to relax him. All of a sudden, my hand was no longer caressing his hair and my body no longer perched on his soft, cool lap, instead a firm but comfortable mattress took his place. Jesus, when, how, seriously how did I miss that? One second we were in a wonderful embrace and then he just pulled away, why? My anxious eyes took in Edward, as he paced back and forth in front of me, with hands jammed deep inside his jeans front pockets. I held my breath, while my heart hammered almost painfully against my chest as I anxiously waited to hear his next words.

"The car ride was quiet, mixed with tension in the small, enclosed space and my Mother tried to ease it by starting a random conversation. Which unfortunately for her was pointless, my father hadn't said one word since him and I talked back at the house, just continued to drive with this blank expression on his face. While I did whatever necessary to distract myself, to not stir up any attention. So that's when I texted you, remember?"

Edward glanced at me quickly, observing my reaction and I looked intently at him, nodding wordlessly. My mind automatically reminded me about the texting we had done that morning, discussing our plans for that day. All the while I was beyond excited and nervous to see him because it would be different then the other times I did. That day we were going to hang out as an item, though taking things slow but nonetheless, I was over the moon about it. While chatting with him, enjoying lighthearted and fun conversation through the messages, he was dealing with tough issues regarding his father. If I had only known more about what he was going through, known that was the last time I would ever speak to him for several years, I would have... The air in my lungs seemed to nearly escape, the walls closing in around and it became more and more difficult to breathe, to think. It really hadn't registered that by him sharing what happened that morning, it would take us back to a place and time that was beyond devastating.

"Easy Bella, you need to try to relax and breathe sweetheart."

Edward's silky voice startled me, bringing me back to the present and after shaking my head a few times, I glared at him once more with a puzzled expression. He halted his pacing only to acknowledge my look, his beautiful butterscotch pools burning with such intensity as the corners of his mouth twitched just a little.

"Your breathing Bella is pretty unstable and your heart rate is over the roof, please try to take it easy. Do you want me to stop for now?"

Oh right, Mr. Super Powers himself, how could I have almost forgotten he can hear my erratic breathing and my alarming heartbeat so easily? I sighed heavily, willing my body to pull itself together. Thankfully it cooperated, aiding my breathing to a stable level and my heart controlled it's relentless thumping. Never mind that Bella, think back to what he last said. He's once more trying to opt out of this and if I wasn't so completely on edge and heartbroken, I would call him on it. But part of me understands his hesitation, I mean hell, every second he's getting closer to revealing what exactly happened and that's enough to tempt me into pleading him to not utter another word. However, since I'm sadistic and curious I preferred for him to continue.

Edward frowned, clearly displeased, already aware of my answer by the expression that's planted on my face. He sighed woefully then muttered,

"I figured as much, why did I even ask?"

"Sorry Eddie. But I just think you should finish. I mean, if you want, because I really want to hear," I cut myself short, ceasing the verbal vomit before it worsened. Christ Bella, cant you attempt to speak like a normal human being? And seriously, were you just about to say you really want to hear about his untimely "death"? You might as well ask him to give you the entire gory play by play while you're at it! Dammit brain, that's enough out of you!

Edward cleared his throat, turning his back to me, remaining still in place and then shook his head. "No, it's I who should be apologizing. Telling you this is more difficult then I anticipated."

God, my heart is incapable of splitting anymore then it is right this moment. It's killing me to see him this way and all I want to do is is wrap my arms snugly around his middle and back, embrace him using all the strength I own. Then whisper words of comfort in his ear while stroking his baby soft hair. I've come to an insane, unbelievable realization that his emotions are mine as well. I feel every ounce of his happiness, sadness, anger and even jealously. How is this possible, especially after being apart for such a long length of time? I'm aware that him and I have always shared a connection, one that's raw, genuine and unbreakable. But is he aware of it also? Does he feel all of my emotions too? A thick sounding sigh lured me out of my deep train of ponders and instantly I directed my attention to Edward.

"The silence in the car started to take a toll on all of us, causing the already present hostility to cloud. My mother had given up on the idea to push my father and I to speak to the other, giving us the cold shoulder while throwing us a disapproving glare. Even though the guilt was eating at me over seeing my mom so torn, it didn't completely take away the happiness I felt. The excitement was building up after each time I reread the texts you sent. Savoring each one, committing them to memory, seemed ridiculous perhaps-" Edward trailed off, looking deep into eyes while flashing a sheepish grin.

My heart fluttered warmly over the touching words and I could feel the aching sob lodged in the middle of my throat as stinging wetness blurred my vision. Had I known that I was the last person to give him a little bit of happiness that fateful day, I would have said more, laid out all the cards and finally revealed to him my feelings. Bella, remember what he said; no looking back, only moving forward. But damn easier said then done, the events of this whole evening have stirred up so many old memories, feelings and wounds. It's starting to take a toll on me and I'm positive it is on him as well. Once more Edward's voice interrupted my internal ramble, his tone etched with such despair my chest tightened in reaction.

"It was those texts and you, that kept me sane throughout the uncomfortable car ride." Edward's brows bunched as another bittersweet expression laced on his angelic appearing face.

My heart pumped much too erratically and rapidly against my ribs, the deafening noises ringing my eardrums. Pull yourself together, for him dammit, he needs you to be strong. But there's just this suspicion I cant shake, this knot of dread that's plaguing my chest, my stomach, a warning that the worse is yet to being told.

"Just when I was about to listen to some music on my mp3 player, my father unexpectedly grabbed my attention by verbalizing one word. His voice brimmed with such immense anger and disappointment that it's impossible to forget.

" 'Why." he demanded.'

"I saw his eyes glaring at me heatedly, as they reflected off the rear view mirror, presenting his signature Edward Masen "angry at the world" look. And automatically waves of nerves rolled relentlessly in my stomach. My mother appeared utterly nervous at that point since she already knew what was coming. A storm, one that was brewed by my father himself. I watched as her shaky hand reach out and gently touch his shoulder to relax him before he even started. Naturally he chose to childishly ignore her, his attention sorely trained on the road ahead, behaving like nothing was even said. Deadpan silence radiated between us all for several long moments and eventually I just shrugged it off, figuring that maybe he was speaking to himself." Edward cut himself short, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly then withdrew a shuddering exhale.

He lowered his gaze, directly staring at my room's carpeted floor, then it happened so suddenly my head spun. Edward balled his hands into tight fists, that hung freely to either side of him. His shoulders tensed greatly and his jaw locked so tautly I was sure it would crack at any given moment. Glacial shivers radiated up and down my spine and throughout the rest of my insides, numbing and freezing my bones. My bodies alarming responses pushed me to mentally and emotionally brace myself. I was proud that I was able to keep a neutral expression but yet was unable to stare directly at him, if I did, there's no predicting what my reaction would be.

"Out of the blue, my father spoke again, this time using a composed tone that was quite frankly, more intimidating then when he raised his voice.

"'Why would you give up your dream?' He had asked."

"My mother and I watched as his hands clutched onto the steering wheel so vise like his knuckles colored a bone white and appeared like they were about to break off his skin. I didn't dare match his fiery gaze, cowardly keeping my eyes lowered. But then I stole a peek and what I saw will forever be etched in my mind. His eyes displayed utter disappointment, sadness and rage, also bloodshot from the effects of the-" Edward shook his head, exhibiting his struggle with maintaining composure over the heart breaking memory.

It's simply baffling how he's able to defy the odds regarding the loss of human memories when you're an immortal. I of all people can relate somewhat, knowing from experience that they're some memories that are simply too traumatic to forget. I swallowed hard, shoving back down another sob that was itching to release, rapidly blinking back tears that was determined on escaping. Edward then caught me off guard by turning around and facing me, gazing evenly into my doe browns. God, his eyes all though remaining their stunning golden tint, had darkened, blazed and reflected such intensity, giving me a view into his very soul.

"He was so enraged Bella, so bitter and it killed me that I was the cause of it." Edward ceased short once more, running a trembling hand through his now very disarrayed hair. Good God I want to be the one to do that, to comfort him in that manner.

" 'Why? Why are you doing this? Why are you giving up your lifelong dream Edward? Why?'"

Edward's raised voice caught me off guard, so much so I flinched lightly in reaction. Quickly and inconspicuously I focused on him, who seemed unaware of my presence, deeply submerged in his tragic, grief-stricken memories. Taking a chance, I hesitantly pushed myself off the bed, ready to walk over to him only to stop short and sit back down when Edward's unrecognizable voice startled me.

"I wasn't even allowed to defend myself, my father kept rambling and attacking me by using the power of words.

" 'You gave up a scholarship Edward! A full ride to one of the best law schools. A chance in a lifetime opportunity that most of these kids in this podonk town only dream of! I set you up an internship with one of the best damn attorneys I know, so he could take you under his wing. So that you could witness first hand what's its like to work at a law firm. And not just any law firm but-'"

" 'Edward please. Not here, not now.'" My mother urged in a soothing yet reprimanding voice." Edward cut off once more which granted me a brief second to marvel over his voice skills. Jesus Christ, I'm not sure if he's realizing it but he's imitating his parent's voices to a T which by the way is kind of creeping me out.

"All my father had to do was throw my mother a silent, fierce look and her mouth closed then directed her attention to glancing out the window. Where as I just had to behave like the ass of an eighteen year old I was, by presenting my own arguments.

" 'Seattle has great colleges," I informed him, " 'UDub has outstanding degree programs, classes, teachers and Seattle has one of the top hospitals in the country, which is perfect since I'll be studying-'"

"I had stopped right there since unfortunately my father was plainly aware of what my mouth would say next. You'd think most parents would be thrilled, even over the moon that their child wanted to study medicine. But no, not him. Because his obstinate mind was set on one thing and one thing only. His desire was for me to pursue his dream, live the life he claimed he never experienced. I never understood that, from the looks of it, he had it all, a unexpected successful career in a small town, married to a beautiful, devoting wife and father to a son who wasn't troubled and straight narrowed. But it was never, enough..." Edward's topaz pools shined with wetness that refused to free. My heart sank to the very depths of my twisted stomach over the distressing sight, while the air in my lungs seemed to almost diminish.

"Edward," I whispered sympathetically.

He flashed me a half gentle smile that didn't touch his eyes or affect the grim expression on his beautiful face. "I'm all right love, promise." He assured gently, his tone velvety smooth again.

The traitor tears then effortlessly flowed but before they could make a trail over my cheeks, his fingertips captured them, this time swiping my heated, damp skin tenderly. I sighed in contentment when his snow-cold pads soothingly caressed my right cheekbone then slowly navigating over to my jawline. My eyes then met his and immediately were captive by their hypnotic depths.

"Are you all right? Shall I proceed?"

His question pulled me out of the heavy, intoxicated spell I was under for the millionth time it seemed, over the coarse of the night. My conscience then pointed out how selfish I'm acting and appearing. Here he is, flat out concerned over my well being when I'm the one who should be consoling him. What the hell is wrong with me? But all I managed to do was nod weakly, submitting my best game face for his sake, then answered quietly,

"I'm fine Eddie, honest. Please, go on."

Edward stared at me apprehensively, quizzically and I nodded again, urging him with a wordless look that I want and for need him to continue. Edward sighed but obeyed, proceeding on in a flat, emotionless pitch.

" 'Medical school?'"

"My father had enunciated the words like they were dirty.

" 'You're serious?' he asked incredulously.

"He used the rear view mirror to glare at me before diverting his attention to the road. I was a coward as usual when in his presence and refused to stare back because I couldn't handle the disappointment he harbored for me. Nonetheless I refused to back down because I believed in what I wanted and no matter what he said, I wasn't going to change my mind. Suddenly the car accelerated at an near dangerous speed and my mother tried to reason with him, suggested that he slow down but he refused to. At that rate, he was irrational, short tempered, just, no longer my father. But of course, he never was quite himself while under the influence." Edward chuckled bitterly, "I tried to coax him as well but he yelled over my voice. Then, thunder howled in the distance, vibrating the car windows and massive rainfall appeared soon after. I noticed the road seemed barely visible even to the greatest pair of eyes but that didn't stop my father from having another rampage,"

" 'All for a girl, right? Huh son!'" He looked completely volatile, his eyes blazing yet underlined immense dislike. It crushed my heart, until he said..."

Edward halted to release a sharp gust of breath. His chest heaved alarmingly, abnormally and the mask that displayed on his face was abruptly frightening. His jaw flexed then tightened and pure anger seemed to roll off him in monumental waves. My breath caught as a flow of panic slammed against my chest causing my heart rate to spike dangerously. A burst of intuition made my abdomen churn and I felt like I was going to be literally sick. I struggled to pull myself together, brush aside the negative feelings as paranoia. But deep down quite aware of why Edward's reacting this way. I wanted to stop him before he even started but was fuckin unable to find my voice, leaving me no other option but to hear the words that will wound my heart. He stole a quick glance my way, his face expressed remorse, while his lips moved so quickly it was almost impossible to catch what was voiced.

" ' It's that Bella Swan girl. Charlie Swan's daughter.' " My father accused venomously, his voice laced with pure hatred and I shuddered. " 'You're giving up your life, the best opportunities, for her? For a hussy, know it all, holier then thou bitch?' "

Edward's voice rumbled so profoundly it echoed and I swear the bed trembled just slightly. It was beyond trying to keep my temper in line, to ignore my blood as it boiled heatedly underneath my flesh. Mr. Masen is dead, it wouldn't be right to think ill of him, but then again, who was he to fuckin judge, speak about me in such a cruel manner? But if I'm to be honest, I don't disagree with his assessment regarding my character. He was right, I was a know it all, I was a bitch. I had treated Edward beyond cruelly most days. Eerily however, history has an unbelievable way of repeating itself. Here I am years later, treating Edward like shit, lashing out at him for ridiculous reasons and throwing Jake in his face just to intentionally make him suffer. It's high school all over again. I don't think it's conceivable to loathe myself more then I do this very second. I will right things between us, somehow, someway. My thoughts dissipated suddenly when my eyes noticed Edward squeezing his lids securely shut, his mouth angrily pursed and while his nostrils flared he continued,

"Right then something inside me erupted and all I saw was red, the fury that stirred within took me by surprise. Sure my father was capable of upsetting me often but at that moment I hated him. So much that I wanted to punch him square on his smug, righteous face. But instead I lashed out at him, the fear I bared for him entirely gone because all I thought about was how he heartlessly insulted the only girl I ever loved.

" 'Don't you ever, ever speak about her that way again! You hear me you bastard, ever!'"

" 'Edward, stop, don't speak to your father that way." My mother chided apprehensively. I unheeded her plead, leaning forward in my seat towards where my father was, eying him darkly. It didn't even phase him, he concentrated on his driving, acting casually like we were having a random discussion about the weather.

" 'Liz, it's all right.' " He consoled my mother quietly. He guffawed approvingly, breaking out into a wide grin while praising, " 'It's fantastic to see my son finally develop a backbone. So I take it you finally became a man huh? Well, if you haven't, do what you need to do with that Swan girl and broom her fast.' " My father glowered at me dead straight in the eye once more and my mom gasped, clearly disturbed over his cold and twisted choice of words. I was shocked as well but that quickly flew out the window the more times my mind repeated what he said. I clenched my hands into fists, my temper exploding more and more by the second but when the next thing he said, almost pushed me over the edge,

" 'Son, listen to me, there are plenty of others out there. More in your caliber, you'll get over her. You have to, you can't let a woman, any woman take over and ruin your life, your dreams. If you foolishly allow it to, it will destroy you, I guarantee it.' "

"My father stopped his insensitive rambling when realizing the brutality of his words, how it affected the woman sitting beside him. My mother whimpered, breathing out a choked gasp as her beautiful eyes were swimming with moisture. It became very difficult to hold back from lunging at him at that point, the resentment overshadowing my better judgment. But in my defense, it was inconceivable what he implied about my mother, what he voiced about you."

Edward's face switched to a sober expression, but then just as rapidly, flipped back to the hostile one he wore previously. My mouth widely gaped, the vast shock, vice gripped my heart and chest. However there wasn't a chance to absorb the flurry of emotions because then Edward spoke using an almost inaudible, dim laced tone,

"I demanded that he pull the car over to the side of the road, since clearly he shouldn't be driving while in that state and especially because we were arguing. I should have done something more to stop him, to stop us from taking another step out the door... He dismissed my urgent pleas, driving faster with a crazed look in his eyes while muttering profanities under his breath. I didn't help any by yelling back at him, meanwhile my mother struggled to referee the both of us. All of a sudden, screeching, piercing sounds coming from a car horn captured our attention. Immediately my eyes directed over to my mother, whose face paled as a sheer terror expression displayed-

"Then everything next happened so fast, my mother screaming my father's name and he swerved the car on instinct, trying to veer it over to the side of the road. While I observed the hustle of events unfolding as something large headed straight in our direction, moving in such a rapid speed. Then, glass shattered, scattering everywhere and flying directly at us. There was so much of it, all over the place and I'd never forget my mother's blood curling screams. The car descended, turning over, the roof of the vehicle caved and crunched against me. After darkness invaded-" Edward trailed off, leaving the implicit, heart stopping words to linger.

My heart was thundering so violently, uncontrollably, I was positive it would rip out of my tightened, stinging chest. All of a sudden icy chills made itself home underneath my skin and I hugged my middle instinctively. I exhaled, paying extra attention to my breathing, making sure it wasn't unsteady or too loud so it won't alarm Edward. The last thing he needs is to see and hear me fall apart at the seams over his horrific, agonizing memories. As challenging as it is, it's necessary for me to get a damn handle of my emotions for his sake. He was right though, their ordeal was devastating, worse then I ever imagined. I'm unsure what to make of it all. Edward's lids finally reopened, revealing his worn and mournful butter eyes. It was downright wrenching to gaze at him yet I was unable to look away. Edward's face then changed again, switching to an eerie calm one as he murmured,

"We were on a abandoned stretch of road that became slick due to the endless downpour that morning and a logging truck lost control because of the pavement's poor condition. But, my father's reckless driving didn't help matters either. The head of the truck collided against the drivers side, crushing my parents instantly and the car split in half. They were killed instantly as I was informed later-" He paused briefly when detecting my perplexed look.

He sighed deeply. "I'll elaborate more on that shortly. When I finally came to, I found myself buried under the split metal of the car and it appeared that it had tumbled over an embankment. Several different sounds and activities grabbed my attention and I started to panic but then the instincts kicked in. Mustering the will to find a way out so I could get to my parents and save them. But my body was trapped underneath the metal and when I attempted to move, immediate pain shot everywhere from my head down, it was excruciating but of course," Edward smiled bleakly.

"Not as much as the venom that coursed through my veins when I was turned."

"Oh God." I interceded, my voice small and etched with sheer agony. I was completely unaware I had said anything aloud anyhow, until Edward's honey pools fixed on my face.

Ice had suddenly attacked my heart while my chest constricted once again. Time then stopped for the longest of seconds as my brain processed over his last words. Venom, veins, pain. I could feel the burning vile stir in the back of my throat, trying forcefully to release out of my mouth but thankfully I swallowed it down, wincing over the light pain. Just as my lids suppressed back prickling moisture, Edward stood across from where I sat, then crouched low in order for our faces to meet at eye level.

"Isabella, are you... maybe I should... God, I should have thought this through, realize what this would do to you after hearing this."

A lingering stillness wavered throughout the room, all though tense I found a little comfort in it as well. Perhaps since breathing in Edward's sweet, potent scent and feeling the cold that radiated off his pale skin, helped me momentarily forget all that was just said. His granite hands captured the sides of my face and his liquid eyes blazed on mine so intently, it penetrated right into my very soul. I really wish he'd be able to tune into my thoughts this exact moment. Then he would know the grief and remorse I'm carrying for him. I nodded sadly, inclining deeper onto his gentle touch and reveling over how it's warming my insides.

"I'm fine. It's you that I'm concerned about. Jesus, Eddie, I had no idea. What happened next, I mean, how were you..." I cut off because it was clear my mouth refused to verbalize the painful words. Naturally my facial expression was easy to decipher and because of that, Edward figured out exactly what I was about to ask.

"It was a woman who... well, I believed she was human at first, until.." Edward halted when catching the horrific and astonished look on my face.

He shook his head back and forth while hesitantly dropping his hands off my cool, damp cheeks. Then without uttering another word, he effortlessly and gingerly scooped my body off the bed, maneuvering me over to the middle and carefully laid me down. Just as my lips parted open, ready to protest, my warm, soft comforter covered my body securely. Before I had the chance to process what was taking place, the lights cut off and darkness invaded the now quiet space. Damn him and his Flash speed. Slowly I went into a sitting position, my back touching the headboard of the bed, then fixed my gaze over to where Edward stood. My eyes strained in the blackness but was able to make out his form which appeared uncomfortable. His hands jammed deep inside his jean pockets and a solemn mask etched on his bone white face.

"You need your rest now." He stated not suggested, in a emotionless tone.

My eyes narrowed instantly and I turned my head back and forth irritably.

"No, I'm okay. I'm not tired, I," Then using such surprising force, I shoved the thick comforter out of the way and glared at him accusingly.

"You cant just leave. Just expect me to go to sleep after all that has been said. Why are you keeping the rest from me?"

"Shh." Edward silenced me softly. His voice so melodious, my body almost surrendered to the deep, blissful slumber it's so desperately wants to be in. I looked on while he tensely sauntered over to the left side of the bed. Then immediately flashed an assuring gaze to ease my nerves but it didn't escape me how his eyes displayed anxiety and guilt.

"I apologize for the misunderstanding. I'm not leaving, I can stay here all night if you wish." His honey pools flickered, landing on the corner of my bed. "I could sit over there while you sleep. I mean, I don't have to lay with you, if that's what you-"

I huffed dramatically, rolling my eyes, "Stop being ridiculous Edward. Of course I want you to stay. I know I said otherwise earlier and I'm sorry for that. I shouldn't even ask this but I would love it if you laid beside me, please."

I paused, catching the slightest trace of a smile on those heavenly, kissable lips of his, which brightened his entire seraphic face. My heart melted over the sight and my stomach flipped. He's so beautiful. Earth to Bella, don't you see what he's trying to pull? He's once again distracting you so that you'll forget all that was previously discussed and of course, positively succeeding. The second Edward's lean, sinfully perfect body touched the mattress, I gestured my hand to stop him short.

"Oh no you don't Masen, you think it's going to be that easy." I laughed lightly when his eyes widened and confusion that settled on his face was priceless. Leave it up to me to brighten the strained, melancholy mood.

"You have to earn your way to claim a spot on here." I grinned at him teasingly and he returned it while wiggling his brows suggestively.

"Well, that can be arranged." He purred in such a sultry tone, I was oh so close to having an climax.

Christ I'd give anything just to feel his satiny, cool tongue glide up and down my moist folds while I roughly tug on his tousled hair, wordlessly urging him to keep going. The mere vision of it, caused pleasurable heat to circulate between my thighs and my lower belly clenched wonderfully. I hadn't noticed that my tongue glided across my tingling, parched lips, until the sexy sounds of Edward groaning in approval caught me off guard. So quickly that I wasn't even sure how it happened, Edward seated to the left side of me and instantly my eyes noticed his shoes were removed. Again he motioned in lightning speed, placing his strong hands on my hips, then gingerly and flawlessly lifted me up and setting me down on top of his lap. Okay this is unexpected but nice, pleasantly nice. I exhaled quietly, positioning myself so that I'm straddling him, setting my legs to either side. My body then had a mind of it's own, guiding my hips to sway back and forth slowly, rhythmically as simultaneously our mouths pressed together hungrily.

"Christ Bella." He growled through gritted teeth, his tone illegally hot and filled with utter desire.

Ecstasy started to occupy my mind, body and soul, shoving my better judgment to the far back of my mind. All I could think about was how unfucking believable he is and feels. His lips moved against mine so delicately yet heatedly and I immersed myself after each breathless kiss, paying no mind that I was almost losing breath. Edward grunted, his velvet voice laced with evident arousal. He tightened his grip on my hips but exercising caution so he wouldn't inflict any more pain on the scratches that are marked on my skin. I ground forcefully onto his muscular hips in response, dumbfounded for the briefest of seconds over how icy and rigid his torso is. Our heated eyes locked again and my arousal doubled from the steamy and desperation glare to his.

Edward's overall actions appeared slightly nervous, frantic, as if this was the only time he would ever have me this way, like it's our last moments together. It's entirely understandable after all he's been through and because of that I want to show him, tell him, that I'm not going anywhere, that I am his forever. His Greek God like body, his skin rubbing perfectly against mine, his delicious taste on my lips and tongue, is all I want this very second, more then anything else I've ever desired, even water or air. I just need more contact, want our bodies to unite as one as we verbally declare our feelings for the other.

My thoughts slowly faded when stimulating sensations blanketed inside and out of my body. The pleasurable friction caused by Edward's long, thick bulge as it guided up and down my fiery and soaked but unfortunately, clothed center.

"Mmm, good fuckin god, your scent is so... sinfully lovely." Edward whispered, his voice rich with satiable lust and my core responded again throbbing fervidly "And you're also really, really,"

"Wet." I supplied in a rough, breathless pant, then kissed him hard and frantic, just to prove him I'm no fragile little human.

Surprisingly he surrendered, giving in to the passion and yearning, reverting the kiss as his hands seized my face. His mouth motioned greedily, frantically while grunting softly under his breath. It wasn't long before our tongues did their familiar dance, except this time it was unpredictable, rough and not our usual sensual, sweet waltz. Our hips were completely in sync, circling slow and sensually, never missing a beat and fuck he feels oh so head spinning. His icy, marble lips parted from mine but quickly latched onto my jugular. I threw my head back, granting him easier access and closed my eyes, reveling over the intense, exhilarating currents that's racing through my veins. My deep moans were much too loud, it was right out embarrassing but didn't care enough to be ashamed, or who may overhear. Edward's luscious, cold as ice lips and icy tongue sucked and lapped every inch of my enticing bare skin.

"Edward, God, Ohh."

"My sweet Isabella. You are so delicious and ravishing." He whispered tenderly against the middle of my throat.

"Eddie, that feels so incredible, god." I groaned under my breath, my voice much too shaky and deep.

He cupped the hairline of my neck, grabbing a few strands of hair, while using his free hand to explore underneath my shirt. His slender, long fingers traveled across my navel, then inching their way up to my bra less, delicate breasts.

"I can do this all night if you like." Edward stated casually, as he lifted his head up from underneath my chin and immediately my eyes fluttered open the second they felt his penetrating gaze.

I nodded dazedly in reply, unable to process any of this since my head was spinning- the air coming too fast and shallow. Once again succumbing to my deepest desires, rocking my hips once more and my hands found purchase on his granite cold waist. I advanced harder and faster, fully aware I was dry humping the hell out of him like a dog in damn heat, again didn't care enough to stop. His continuous groans, grunts and moans, were music to my ears, encouraging me to keep going.

"Jesus Edward, please, just," I begged shamelessly, eying him directly throwing a aroused yet pleading expression.

I mean, he must be aware of what my body is trying to convey to him, what his body is hinting to him as well. He's choosing to torture me instead of heeding my silent request, taking his sweet ass time while savoring every curve and slope of my soft, full mound. His frigid digits caressing my pert nipple, then using his thumb and pointer finger to pull and twist the sensitive skin.

"Your breasts are beyond exquisite." He marveled in a desirous tone, mouthing and licking the base of my throat again.

I moaned breathlessly when his razor sharp teeth lightly grazed my skin, coating it afterward with his silky, cold tongue.

"Christ, your scent, your pulse, the way your heart is racing, you absolutely have concept what it does to me."

Yes, I do because the same applies to how I feel about him. Is it remotely possible that one man, well vampire, can make a woman experience such unthinkable, head spinning emotions and be real? No woman is this lucky. Most of us have fantasies. You know the ones where we conjure up the most sexy man we can imagine and envision him making us feel so amazingly wonderful that it has to be a dream. Well damn, mine is a reality this very minute and I intend on basking every touch, kiss and whatever else he desires to give. Hold up, does this mean, are we going to finally... A chilly breeze waved over the upper half of my torso, halting my over thinking brain. My eyes reflexively lowered, discovering that my shirt had been removed and I was no longer straddling his lap. Instead lying flat on my back with Edward hovering flawlessly over me, holding himself carefully so that I felt none of his weight. His honey eyes met mine just as his gorgeous, delectable mouth covered my left breast and I gasped from the cold his skin provided. Then moving much too quickly, his large hands gently spread my legs apart so he could wedge his frame between them.

"Oh God." I panted heatedly after Edward lowered his head further, stopping at just the right angle.

Then wasting no time, guiding his lips to suction over my nipple, pulling back and forth ravenously. Fuck, the way his tongue is twisting rapidly over my swollen tautness is driving me insane. More and more by the second, my lower stomach muscles coiled and tightened while warmth spread evenly, the signs that an explosive O was sure to make it's grand entrance.

"Are you about to cum my love? Or is there more I need to do in order for it happen sooner?" Edward inquired curiously, his tone etched with mischief and seduction. Instantly my heart spluttered over his sexy words, his spine tingling touches and it was sufficient to nearly drive me into cardiac arrest.

Did he seriously just ask that? Of course I want his face buried between my thighs and tongue fuck me so deliriously, I wont be able to see straight for days. But why the sudden hesitation? Why is my damn conscience suggesting that I stop him from proceeding any further? Oh damn it to hell, I cant believe I'm about to put an end to the most sensual, toe curling assault but I must. Because, how could I have missed this? Um, duh because you're horny ass only sees what it wants to when your lost in a erotic trance. That fine ass, manipulative immortal has been playing me. This whole red hot make out session was his way to make me forget, even for a little while, that he didn't finish explaining what else occurred the last day he was human.

I refuse to just leave it on that note, where he left off, it'll be difficult get an ounce of sleep unless he concludes the rest of the story. After exhaling heavily, I hastily pulled myself to a sitting position which unfortunately stopped Edward abruptly. He rolled off my lap, backing away slightly to kneel towards the left side of me and a puzzled, wounded expression etched on his face. The rate he was moving, I had a feeling he was oh so wonderfully close to... No, this is the right thing to do for the both of us and especially for him, sadly he needs to relive it again in order to obtain some closure.

I shook my head tensely, blindly searching for my shirt which thankfully was still in one piece as it dangled over the edge of the bed. After retrieving it, pulling it over my head and without a backward glance, I crawled out of bed. I tried to remain steady but my body swayed from side to side, an after effect from Edward's spine tingling kisses and touches. Before my clumsiness got the better of me, he was right by my side, carefully balancing me upright before my knees buckled. I took a deep breath in hopes it would rid the fiery currents that still lingered within and bring me back to earth. All of a sudden, blinding white light filtered throughout the room and it took a second to register that Edward had taken the liberty of turning on the bedside lamp. Right away, my remorse written eyes darted up to train on his slightly widened golden ones which showed such concern, my heart sank over the sight. I exhaled quietly when he held my face in his hands, angling it up so that our faces were at almost even level. My eyes instinctively shut as I reveled over his loving, soothing touch and I quickly found myself half under his spell once again.

"Bella, what's the matter? Why did you...God, I hurt you, didn't I? You don't want to do this, do you-"

I shook my head quickly in disagreement, wanting right away to clear his insecurities and the troubled, questioning look his face wore.

"No, I'm fine. You didn't hurt me, I swear and I want to do this, believe me but," I chuckled awkwardly, pondering, hurt me? No, he did the exact opposite of hurt.

"Eddie, I'm onto to your tricks. I know what you're trying to do."

Unwillingly I withdrew from him, crossing a couple of steps back. Edward's brows pulled together, appearing thoughtful and probably trying to read my mind, even though it's impossible. As my eyes narrowed while throwing an accusing stare, his expression switched to an innocent one and in response I placed my hands on my hips.

"Oh, don't play innocent Masen. You knew exactly what the hell you were doing, attempting to seduce me, so that I wouldn't remember you had more story to share."

"Seducing you, really?" Edward mocked, grinning casually then laughed heartily.

He raised a challenging brow, slowly taking the two steps needed to bridge gap between us, standing so close our bodies tightly pressed. He cocked his head to the side while gazing deeply into my eyes and I was unable to look away, the depths of his topaz pools utterly mesmerizing. Edward then exhaled out purposely so that his sweet breath fanned over my very rose-cheeked face. Christ, I'm fucked.

"If memory serves me correctly, you expressed having no problem with my seducing, Swan." His hands curled over my shoulders, then slowly traveled them downward and upward seductively. Sweet Jesus, why did I stop him? No, no, you're letting him do it to you again. Obiwan Kenobi would be so proud of Edward's sinful but pleasing mind tricks.

"No, Edward stop. I, we shouldn't. Please, we cant continue on until we figure out what's the deal with us." I gestured my right hand back and forth between us. "Until you finish what you started. I need to know."

Edward inhaled sharply, narrowing his eyes and through clenched teeth, he hissed,

"Why? Why do you need to know? Why is it so important to you? Why cant you just let it-"

"Go? Because I went to your funeral believing you were dead!" I yelled emotionally, fighting to keep my voice even as a aching sob lodged in the back of my throat.

"I mourned for you every second of everyday. Wishing you were here to hold me, wipe away my tears after my mother died. I wanted to hear you tell me you love me just one more time, even though I was, am, unworthy of your love. Because I visited a grave, your grave, that probably didn't even have a body in it! Can you just... imagine for a minute what I went through? Wait, of course you don't need to, since you saw with your own eyes, spying on me for so long, watching me suffer day after day! And you didn't even... why are you just standing there? Say something, god Edward!" My voice strangled and before long, I wept hard right against Edward's marble smooth chest.

My hands instantly clung the collar of his form fitting, charcoal colored shirt as the scorching moisture continued to release. The overwhelming grief that attacked my heart and chest subsided when arctic fingers knotted in my hair, combing through my tangled strands tenderly.

"Bella, please believe me when I say that's all I imagined for years. Constantly wondering what you were going through, worried about how you would adjust from one day to the next. And I'm sorry Bella, deeply, truly sorry for all the pain and misery you went through because of me. If I could turn back the clock and do things differently I would... My heartfelt condolences regarding your mother by the way, I remember how much you adored and loved her." The regret etched in his voice was so staggering, my breath caught. Edward then stroked my back soothingly, catching onto my anxiety and thankfully the tears lessened and heart was beating back to it's normal, steady rhythm.

I nodded appreciatively while whispering, "Thank you."

"I will take forever if necessary, to make things right. I will never fail you again." his tone soft as silk yet unwavering.

Edward then gently lifted my face away from his chest then placed it between his hands and his eyes delved into mine. God they are spectacularly beautiful, even if a different color now, they're unmistakeably the same ones I fell for, all those years before. Once again light moisture slipped past my eyes and cheeks and just as they almost flowed over my chin, his soft thumbs captured them, wiping tenderly.

"But I regret to point out you're also wrong. The pain and loss you went through, I bared it as well. Do you seriously believe it was so easy for me to watch you mourn while I was so nearby that I could touch you? I missed you terribly and longed for you every second, minute, hour and day. But I couldn't just... I mean, I was a newly immortal, one that was very capable of hurting you or worse, kill you by accident," His eyes tightened, etched with such conviction there was no room for me to disagree and my response was a simple nod of agreement.

"I had to be positively certain I was strong enough, able and ready to see you. Even when I was, many questions came to mind, how should I approach you? What would I say, would you even believe it's me? How would you react to me being like this? Would you want a life with me when I'm this way," Edward broke off, training his eyes directly behind my shoulder.

I took a deep breath, then stifled a yawn that almost freed out of my throat. It's official, I'm past the point of exhaustion, this has been such a long, eventful day and evening. I'm pretty tempted to end it, so that my body can curl up against his while he secures us in a gentle embrace. After, he will console me to sleep, humming that beautiful lullaby he wrote for me. But unfortunately until we close this chapter, the rest will have to wait until tomorrow.

"So that's the reason for the mysteriousness, the seeing you only in the dark bit and referring yourself as E?"

"Yes, exactly. As mentioned previously, I only intended to check in on you, wanting to see what kind of life you had built for yourself. But you looked simply miserable and I just, wanted more of a physical connection. It grew tiresome just observing from the sidelines. And right, all the enigma and the entire "E" persona was for your protection. I wasn't certain that you would be truly safe when in the same room with me. I was gravely frightened I'd harm you but then, you grew impossibly curious and wouldn't leave well enough alone." Edward chuckled dryly and I chimed in, relieved that the heavy tension between us had somewhat lifted.

"So then, I decided to take a chance, make my presence known-"

I snickered, amused, "By sneaking in my room and having your way with me."

Edward smirked and the gleam in his eyes made my heart beat accelerate. A comfortable silence wavered for several moments, just enough for us to find pleasure in our heartfelt embrace. Suddenly, without warning, Edward pulled away and straightaway my eyes uncovered the strained mask on his face.

"Well, are you ready to hear the rest?"

I nodded firmly, expressing with my eyes that I'm positively fine with him continuing and he sighed in response. Then he quickly reached for my hand and instantly our fingers laced. But before given the chance to savor over the soft, cold feeling, Edward led us over to the bed.

"You should sit down for this."

As we seated carefully on the edge of the mattress, my heart thundered painfully against my ribs, a knot of anxiousness and dread plaguing my chest and stomach. After a lengthy, rigid silence, Edward began,

"As I mentioned previously when I awoke after the crash, my initial instinct was to find my parents and nothing else. But unfortunately, that never happened." He inhaled heavily, closing his eyes minutely then releasing an unnecessary breath.

I turned to face him, reaching for his hand, feeling immediate warmth when our fingers intertwined. My eyes analyzed his every movement, looking on as his lids blinked, then opened, revealing his dark glazed eyes. After a torturous minute passed, his melodic tone murmured bleakly,

"All though I was undoubtedly disoriented, I figured out that my side of the car was several feet away from where the crash occurred and the half of the vehicle that my parents were in, remained at the scene. I willed my eyes to adjust so I'd be able to take in my surroundings, unable to make out much beside all the metal and glass that were scattered everywhere. I remember inhaling smoke and wondering where it was came from. It didn't dawn on me at the time it was a result from the collusion." Edward swallowed hard, appearing thoughtful a few seconds.

If I were to speculate, he's probably trying to recollect more details of that fateful morning, even though he stated he remembered almost all of it. I cant even wrap my head around how difficult and traumatic this must be for him. My fingers coiled around his tighter and he breathed out lightly under his breath. I wish that there was more that I can do then just hold his hand but I'm aware by doing this simple but loving gesture is probably helping him more then I realize.

"After a few minutes of reclaiming what minimal strength I owned, I discovered that the left passenger window was completely shattered and it could be a possible escape route. I shifted myself forward, ignoring the sharp bolts of pain that radiated throughout my body. After what seemed like hours, I was still in the same place and the reason why struck me hard in the center of my chest. I had lost all feeling from the waist down."

My eyes widened in horror and it took every ounce of self-control to prevent my mouth from parting so a gasp wouldn't free.

"Carefully and very slowly, I slithered my way out the window, my arms supporting my limp body through the small opening, having to stop briefly when my eyes teared from the thick and potent smoke. I searched all over the vicinity, instantly spotting grass and trees but no other signs of life or indication of where exactly I was. Besides the heavy clouds of fumes in the distance, there were also different shrilling noises that attacked my eardrums and it was just, so... Anyhow, I continued onward as trying as it was due to the pain. Time was quickly passing and I knew my body was about to give out, that darkness would be all my eyes would see and I was terrified, so terrified. My mind then raced with thoughts of my mother, father and you. Mostly you Bella. My greatest fear was that I would never see your beautiful face again or hear your lovely voice." He paused again when witnessing the look of devastation my face presented and he traced the outline of my quivering lips with his cool fingertips.

I inhaled shakily, reveling over his spine tingling caress but the serene emotions were short lived as my moisture made itself home over my eyes. Everything within hurt, hurt so painfully it became very challenging to tolerate. Just when I thought it couldn't be anymore heart breaking, I was proven wrong.

"Never taste those succulent lips again or touch your delicate skin and hear your adorable, infectious laugh." He flashed a tender, wistful look and I returned it solemnly, then he added,

"I wasn't naive by any means, I knew death could come and part of me really wanted it to, because at least then the intense pain would be no more. Amazingly though, I pulled myself together, using what nominal strength I had and kept moving. Unsure at that rate if I'd be able to recover my parents due to the condition I was in. So, I figured I'd try to find help, since the woods were a short distance away, maybe there was a house somewhere and someone inside that I can turn to for help. I didn't even consider that the authorities were probably already on scene or on their way. If a person may have called for assistance, all that was crossing my mind was to get to them." Edward's voice lowered and laced with heart shattering emotion.

My heart was pounding so fiercely against my ribs I was positive Edward could hear it clear as day. My lower lip trembled as once again, fresh tears glided down and naturally, Edward lovingly swiped them away. Dammit, here he goes again comforting me when I should be the one comforting him.

"There was nothing, no house, not a damn thing or person that I could turn to. Just endless trees, greenery, the smoke, various sounds and activities that I was at a loss as to what they were or came from. At that rate it was safe to assume that I needed to stay where I was, because it was downright excruciating to move any further. I attempted to yell but my voice barely carried out. After awhile of trying countless times to call out for help, it was a lost cause, so I laid there, waiting to die. The only thing that kept my body alive was the cloudy but yet vivid images of you, my parents and random memories. All of a sudden, sounds of crunching leaves grabbed my attention just as my eyes closed and the darkness was nearly drifting me away. But my nose inhaled the sweetest, enticing aroma I'd ever encountered and it surprisingly snapped me out of my disorientation."

I heard the rapid gasp, gasp, of the air dragging through my lips while my lungs narrowed viciously, the recognition dumping on me like a pile of bricks. He was describing the very way he smells and that could only mean... Oh God, here comes the part I dreaded to hear almost out of everything else thus far. Edward's bittersweet chuckle caught me off guard and I diverted my attention back to him.

"I thought it was you Bella, coming to rescue me. After all, your scent is without a doubt the most fragrant and exquisite kind I ever inhaled."

I blushed on cue over his comment and he smirked for fraction of a second, then continued,

"But this particular scent was extremely powerful. A mixture of red wine with berries but it wasn't only the scent that captured me, it was... her. I felt the slightest touch against my cheek which was coated with dried up blood. My lids fluttered open from the contact and I flinched when icy, marble fingertips pressed firmly over my wounded skin. I looked up and saw the most brightly colored hair I'd ever laid eyes on. It was long, wavy and orange red, like a fireball. Her breathing was delicate and beautiful, like the sounds of wind chimes. At first, I mistakenly considered she was an angel from heaven that was sent to take me, but then," Edward's jaw locked and his eyes narrowed. Then immediately flickered to lock on mine and I shivered over the hardened gleam in them.

"I caught a glimpse of her eyes, her crimson, feral eyes."

I threw him an horrifying and puzzled look while sputtering,

"Crimson? As in red? But how, but you have-"

Edward grinned darkly, knowingly and my heart plunged rapidly over to my stomach, as the shock did a real number on me.

"Yes, red eyes. You see, a vegetarian vampire like myself, possesses golden eyes since I feed on the blood of animals. But when others of our kind feeds on-"

"A human," I provided hoarsely.

"Their eyes are, crimson." Edward finished with a repulsed mask on his face.

A wave of dismaying knowledge waved over my body's entire length, causing it to freeze and tense. At this second, I'm unsure how much more I want to learn but of course, curiosity got the better of me.

"So, wait," I started hesitantly, clearing my throat then proceeded, "Just a couple of nights ago, even though it was dark in here I noticed... I mean your eyes, they appeared..."

"Black? Yes." Edward interceded, smiling halfheartedly while shaking his head in awe, "Wow, you don't miss a thing."

I laughed, slightly embarrassed, "Well, that's the teacher in me I guess. So, when your eyes are that color, is it because..."

"I'm thirsty, yes." Edward clarified, pausing shortly, which presented me the opportunity to tease,

"Oh, I thought they get like that when your cranky."

Edward scowled disapprovingly, then snorted as the corners of his mouth lifted. "No, you beautiful smart ass. They turn black when I'm thirsty."

I giggled softly, "Which you're obviously not right now."

Edward grinned, "No, which is a very good thing for you by the way."

"It is?"

Way to go Miss foot in the mouth, way to kill the nice, lighthearted moment. I cringed the second his face twisted, displaying a irritable, unfavorable expression.

"Bella, that's not, please don't joke like that."

I almost idiotically blurted out a witty comeback that would positively infuriate him but instead opted to break the silence, by voicing what my nagging mind wanted to know.

"So, then what happened next? What did she... do?"

Translation: Semplicemente bella (simply lovely)

A/N: Well, there you have it, the first half of Edward's tale & yes there is a LOT more, starting with who changed him. Any guesses by the way? It's probably pretty obvious :) Then of course there's the aftermath of the change, who discovered him, etc, then they will be more interaction with him and Bella. After in chapter 16, another day starts and as I mentioned before it's one of my fav chappies! You will see why :) Oh, speaking of chappies, I'm planning as a special treat to post a bonus chapter sometime within the next few days, *crosses fingers* it will be in Seth's POV. Now you're probably wondering why. Well one, I thought it would be fun to write something else other then Bella's pov. Two, this idea came into my head and I just have to write it and share with you all! This chapter will backtrack a bit, detailing the aftermath of what happened to Seth after him and Bella kissed.

Remember when Bella found out that Jake roughed him up after Embry blabbed about the kiss? Well, you will get a peek of the conversation that took place between Jake and Seth, also much more! Hope you all will enjoy this as I will have a fun time writing it :) Also, I want to remind that there's a For Eternity page on FB. Please feel free to like it and talk with me through there. You can ask questions about the story, post on my wall, go on the discussions board and much more! I will be adding more things on there soon, so stay tuned! Oh and check out my profile on here as well, just added the For Eternity music playlist, which I personally love. Okay, that's enough out of me for now, lol. Hope you enjoyed the chapter and let me know what you think, don't be shy! If you review, I may send a teaser for the next chapter :) See you all in about a week, *hugs