So, here we are at chapter 14, which once again didn't turn out how I wanted it to. Hmm...I'm really going to have to work on that.

Anyway, thanks to all of you who reviewed, faves, and alerted. As of right now, there are 54 reviews! ^-^ That's the most I've had on any of my stories. Thanks guys (mostly girls if you want to get technical)!

((Demyx))

I should've kept quiet, no matter how much I wanted to scream at him, to make him believe me. I should've kept quiet…but I didn't. I couldn't. I couldn't keep my mouth shut. I couldn't let him just scream until his heart was content. I just…couldn't.

And, it's not okay.

The way his shoulders are shaking, his deep cobalt eyes as wide as they'll go, his fists clenched together until his knuckles turned white…that is what makes this not okay. Not right. Wrong. I did exactly what I said I wouldn't do, what I promised myself I'd keep from happening. I let him get hurt. And, it was my fault. I'm the one that hurt him, not some jackass drunk in a rundown apartment building. It was I. It was I that did this, that let him get hurt, that caused it.

What have I done?

"Zexion…" I try, my voice shaking pathetically. He doesn't say anything. He just stands there, staring right at me, but through me at the same time. "Listen, I-"

"You're lying." And, for once, his voice doesn't quiver or come out as a breathy whisper. It's strong, but it's not the kind of strength that I want. It's…a broken strength. A kind that can't grasp anything, but can't give it up either. It's the wrong kind of strong, the fake kind that will leave a person high and dry at the mere thought of hesitation.

"Zexy, what are you-"

"You're lying." He repeats, stronger this time, angrier. "You can't love me. No one can love me."

"I'm really not lying."

"Shut up! Yes, you are. You have to be!" And, I don't know what to say. How can I get through that kind of anger? The kind bordering on hysterical? How can I make him believe me? How can I- the stupid, bubbly, moron- make him believe me? How can I break him of the thoughts that he's been carrying around for years? How can I?

I don't know.

I don't know what I'm supposed to say or do. I don't know how to make him understand me. I don't even know how to make him trust me enough to understand. I just…don't know. I don't know what he wants, what he needs, what makes him happy. I can't make him laugh without hiding from the world. I can't make him tell me about his childhood and why he is the way he is. I just…can't figure him out. I don't understand what truly makes him tick, or even how it is that he can go so long without eating.

I'm truly and utterly worthless to him…and I don't know how to fix it. I don't know how to make things any different between us without overstepping my boundaries, without getting in his way. I mean, who am I- the idiot- to try to fix him, love him? I was stupid to even believe that I could, no matter how much I wanted it in the beginning. I was just…the stupid, idiotic, moron that played the fool. Nothing's changed. He still thinks that he's worthless and now he thinks I'm lying to him, telling him of things like love.

But, that doesn't mean I have to give up…does it? That doesn't mean that I have to give up on him, that I have to stop trying. I've always been the fool, why would it matter now?

"Zexy, listen, I'm really not lying. I lo-"

"Don't say it! Don't lie to me…stop lying to me!" He screams, eyes clenched shut, hugging himself. False strength isn't really strength. It's just a mask to hide the hurt that lies beneath it. "You're lying. You're lying. You're lying. You're lying! You can't love me. Don't you understand, Demyx? Don't you understand? You can't love me. You just…can't."

"But, I do." He shakes his head in denial, denying even the very thought. "I really do love you."

"Stop saying that!" He sinks to the floor, his knees held tightly against his chest. "Please, just stop saying that. I can't take it. I really can't." And, I know he's crying, his forehead hidden by his knees, those lithe little shoulders of his shaking uncontrollably. He's crying, and it's all my fault. I hurt him enough to cause those tiny, crystal tears. I caused this.

"Zexy, listen-"

"No! You listen! You can't love me. You can't! I'm too…too broken. Too pale, too skinny, too blunt, too childish, too emotionally deprived. Why can't you understand that? Why can't you?" His voice quivers and shakes, all traces of that false strength gone, leaving only a broken shell. "Why can't you just stop caring? Just ignore me, like everyone else. Just use me, abuse me. Don't treat me like you care. Don't treat me like I mean something, because I don't, Demyx. I just don't. I'm worthless, pathetic, unn-"

"Don't say things like that!" And, he looks at me with those red rimmed, cobalt eyes, his face blotchy from crying. "Don't lie like that…you're not worthless or pathetic or whatever else you think you are! And-and broken things can be fixed, can be made better. Just…trust me. Please, just trust me."

"How can I…?" He whispers, barely loud enough fro me to hear. "How can I trust you when you keep lying like that? I'm worthless, Demyx. Worthless. Why can't you understand that? Why do you insist on treating me like I'm not? Why do you insist on caring? And, broken things can be fixed? Face it, Demyx. There's no coming back from where I am! Don't you fucking get it?"

And, I would do anything for him to not be looking at me like that, for those cobalt eyes to not look so empty. I would do anything. I would give up my music, my friendship with Axel, everything, if only I could fix those precious eyes. If only I could give them the life back that was there only a few days ago. If only I could make them happy again.

If only I could.

((Zexion))

Why?

Why must he lie to me? Why must he look at me so dejectedly with those beautiful, oceanic eyes? Why must he actually care for me? Why must he look at me, truly look at me? Why? That's all I want to know. That's not a lot to want, is it? It's not like I want to know how to rule the world, or the secrets of the universe. So, why can't I just know why? Why can't someone tell me why?

Am I truly so worthless that I'm not even allowed to know the answers to this pathetic questions?

I suppose I am.

"Zexy…I'm not lying. I'm really not. You're not worthless. You're not worthless." And, maybe I should lie and say I believe him just so I don't have to hear any more lies that rip through what little bit is left of my heart. But…I can't do that. No matter what he's done to me, Demyx doesn't deserve to be lied to, nor do I deserve to have my heart put back together. "Why can't you trust me? Why can't you believe me? Why, Zexion, why?" And, it seems I'm not the only one wanting to know.

"Because I can't, Demyx…I just can't." He bites into his lower lip, watching me with oceanic eyes pooling with distressed water. Tears. I'm making him cry.

"That's not good enough! I want- need a reason! I need to know why!" He's screaming, that song like voice of his pounding in my ears, making more and more pathetic tears stream down my face. "Tell me! Tell me why!"

"Fine! Do you really want to know?" I stand, tears still streaking their way down my face, my fists held at my sides. "I can't trust you because I can't trust anyone or anything. I can't believe you because everyone lies. Everyone lies to me. Treats me however it is that they want. Uses me like I'm worthless. And, you want to know what, Demyx? I have to believe them. After all, they can't all be wrong. They can't all be telling me the same goddamn things because they can, right? I'm the one that's wrong. I'm the one! Do you get it yet?

"I'm broken, lost, unneeded. My parents don't give a damn about me, I've been fucked by just about every guy I've ever fucking met. And, you know what else? I should've fucking died. You shouldn't have found me. You shouldn't have brought me home. You shouldn't have done anything for me! Do you really think I'm worth all this shit? All the pain I'm causing you? Do you? Do you?"

What am I doing? Why am I screaming at him, the only person that's ever really cared? Why am I making those tears fall? Why am I belittling everything he's done for me? What am I doing to him? Am I just trying to make him understand, or am I trying to break him just as I was?

No…I can't do that. I can't do that to him. Not after everything he's done to me. Not after all the kindness he showed me. Not after…not after he said he loved me, even if it was nothing but a lie.

"Do you really think that, Zexy? Do you…really think I should have just left you there?" He just looks at me, tears still sliding down those tan cheeks, and I would do anything to make them go away. I would do anything to take back everything I've said. I would do…anything.

"Demyx…I-I…no, I'm…I don't-"

"It doesn't matter. Zexy, it really…doesn't matter." It doesn't matter…does he mean that he believes me? That he believes that I really am worthless and everything he's done for me has been for not? Is that what that means?

I don't know if that's really what I want or not.

"Demyx, I-"

"It doesn't matter, Zexy. It doesn't matter what you mean, or what you say. Because…because, I'll still love you." Oh. If he keeps saying it like that, so serious, so dejectedly, then maybe I'll start to believe him. Maybe I'll start to believe that he's not really lying to me.

But, I can't. I can't let myself be fooled. I can't let myself believe him, just like I did all the others. I'll just get hurt again. I'll just end up on the ledge again, without any will to live. I'll end up lost again. And…I can't let that happen. I can't let myself be like that again, because next time there won't be a Demyx there to catch me. Next time there won't be some idiot willing to take me home. Next time…next time I won't survive.

"Why do you keep saying that?" I whisper, turning away from him, tears finally ready to cease. I want him to give up on me. I want him to make me believe him. I want him to find someone else. I want him to pull me close and make me understand just what it is he sees in me.

I don't know what I want.

And, that's what scares me the most.

"Because it's the truth." I feel him step up behind me, lightly touching my shoulder with one trembling hand. And, maybe he really isn't lying. Maybe he really is telling me the truth, his truth.

"Prove it then. Prove to me that you love me."

And, before I can even blink I'm turned around, flush against his lightly muscled chest, his lips holding mine in the sweetest of all kisses; all I can taste is the ocean, the sea's breezes filling my nose to the brim. I don't know what to do when his tongue touches my bottom lip other than grant him entrance into my moist cavern, letting him taste the disgusting taste that is me. And, it's funny because he doesn't seem to care about the taste or the fact that his soft lips are being scratched by my worthlessly chapped ones. And…I can't remember anyone else ever making me feel sparks so very deeply within my chest.

Moogles…maybe he really does love me.

Yes, Zexy-dear, he's been trying to tell you that for the past 2000 words~

I apologize for how cliche the kissing scene was. I tried to make it a little better, but that's as good as I could get it.

Anyway, I'll try to have a new chapter up soon, and for any of you that are reading 'Keys and Kissing', it should be updated soon.