DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC.
A/N: I WOULD LIKE TO THANK ANYONE WHO HAS SHOWN SUPPORT FOR THIS STORY, AND I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGISE FOR SUCH A LATE UPDATE AS I'M IN MY LAST YEAR OF SCHOOL AND I HAVE HARDLY ANY FREE TIME TO WRITE NOW. HOPEFULLY WITH SPRING BREAK COMING UP I'LL BE ABLE TO UPDATE MUCH MORE REGULARLY. ENJOY THE CHAPTER.
The Doctor found himself aimlessly wandering the TARDIS corridors ; his brain working a mile a minute to figure out what was going on, but be it either his current condition or just over nine hundred years of memories cluttering up his thinking space, he found it impossible to hold onto a single thought for more than a second. He groaned and ran a hand through his hair, mussing it up.
" Sweetie." He flinched at Rivers voice, he didn't want to see him so worked up, she'd only worry more about him than she already did.
River placed her hand on her husbands shoulder gently. " do you want to talk about it?"
Her voice smoothed over him like melted butter. He sighed deeply. " I don't know where to begin."
" well the beginning would be a good starting place, don't you think." She said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, but he could pick out the concern in it as well.
He turned to face her, his eyes darkened and his lips formed a thin line. " I had a vision. " He stated.
Usually River would of laughed at that sentence if it wasn't for the look of seriousness splayed on his face. " What about?" She queried, brushing part of his hair out of his face so she could look directly into his deep, expressive eyes.
" Our child River." His voice cracked and he drew closer to River, basking in her warmth. " I was so scared." He whispered into her ear and hugged her tighter.
" Tell me about it, it might make you feel better." River rubbed his arm tenderly.
The Doctor shook his head and scrunched his eyes shut. " I don't think I can even describe it with words. " His eyes opened again and River could practically see a light bulb going off in The Doctors mind. " I can show you though, that is if you want." The Doctor eyed River warily, unsure.
River nodded. " We've exchanged things telepathically before Doctor, it'll be fine."
" I'm not sure River, the vision was pretty… " He searched for a word that would describe his vision most accurately. " Intense." He finished lamely.
" Look Sweetie whatever it was, don't you think it'll be better if you have someone to share it with." She nuzzled his nose slightly, leaning closer to his skin, the closer she got the clearer the image he gave her would be.
The Doctor and River had always had a close telepathic link, ever since they laid eyes on each other, her as a tiny vunerable baby, and him as the funny man with huge hair, and funny dress sense. Over time they had developed an even closer bond, but there was still some dark stretches of his mind he had built walls around that were kept out of her reach and lately that link had seemed to have drifted, he seemed more closed off, she hoped that this time he'd let her in.
The Doctor to her surprise however was glad for skin to skin contact, and leaned even closer to her so his forehead was literally inches from hers. " River are you sure, no going back once you've seen it." He breathed heavily, trying to hold the still crystal clear memory back so he could give River the choice, he didn't want to burden her .
River smiled, she had dealt with a lot of emotional pain in her life and she had learnt to live with it, but when he was in pain it was an entirely different matter. " Do you even have to ask." She hushed, bringing her hands up, she curled them delicately in his hair.
" River. " He tensed as he felt their skin finally fully touch. " I can't." He whimpered.
" Then don't my love. " She encouraged him.
He relaxed against her, and unable to hold it back any longer, he poured every detail of his vision into her mind, hoping that neither of them would regret it.
She let out a small gasp and nearly doubled over in agony ; not physical but mental affliction. Every small detail bled through, about what The Doctor had seen and felt. There was one constant though … fear. She felt herself pulling away and almost tipping backwards dangerously close to the floor but The Doctor grabbed her before that could happen and dragged her to his chest.
" You ok?" He asked.
She nodded into his chest, tears already spilling from her eyes and dampening his shirt. " What the hell was that? It felt real. "
The Doctor frowned, " You know lately River, I'm beginning to question what's real and what's not."
" I know what you mean. " She agreed. " It's like everything seems normal but there's something out of place, something off."
" How long have you been feeling like this?" The Doctor queried, peering down at his wife who was now hiding in his chest.
River bit her lip, having to think deep and hard for a long while. " Well since.."
" Since when River." He shouted in a low, gravely, no nonsense voice.
" I suppose since the TARDIS knocked us out, all those weeks ago." River said decisively.
" Oh River. You should of told me." He exhaled.
River shrugged, " It was so tiny to begin with I hardly noticed it, I'd forget things, feel more distant from you, and when I closed my eyes I … would just stop."
The Doctor reached inside his tweed jacket and plucked his sonic screwdriver from the lining, he started to scan River. The screwdriver bleeped twice and he read whatever results it was showing franticly. He paled dramatically, the hand holding the screwdriver shook. He swallowed deeply.
" Sweetie what's…" River was interrupted by The Doctor placing a cool finger on her lips.
He began to scan himself and if possible turned even whiter. " Not again." He hung his head low and tried to hold back a sob. He looked up at River and cupped her cheek ; this was history repeating itself all over again." I am so, so sorry River." He muttered under his breath and took a huge step away from her.
" Doctor you're scaring me." Her voice quavered as she took in her husbands grave expression.
" I'll find you." He affirmed, River was unsure what he actually meant but she was comforted slightly by his words all the same. " I always do." He whispered as he pointed his sonic directly at her.
As soon as he had clicked the button on the screwdriver he knew life was about to get a lot harder.
He tried to suppress a scream as his atoms were slowly ripped apart, the last thing he saw was River dissolve into a white messy gloop on the TARDIS floor.
And the only question he could ask was ' why?'.
OOOH THAT ENDING COULD OF GONE IN SO MANY DIRECTIONS BUT JUT LIKE ALL MY STORY PLOTS, IT CAME OUT OF THE BLUE.
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