14

Looking at her reflection in the mirror in her room at Gwen's, Anna released a sigh. A night out with her friends wasn't high on her agenda. Her pyjamas, the sofa, a tub of ice cream and re runs of some American comedy sounded much more up her street. But she had refused Gwen and Mary every Friday night since she had returned from her travels, they wouldn't let her do it again.

Coming home and leaving John had been a wrench, but she did it with the belief she was doing the right thing. Life would go back to normal and she would marry her childhood sweetheart. A man she loved, a man who would take care of her. Or so she had thought.

Anna knew something was off when she saw a pink coat hanging on one of the hooks by the door. She never wore pink. It was then she heard a laugh from down the hallway, a female laugh. The closer she moved to the bedroom she shared with Chris, the louder the noises became. She pushed open the door.

The image before her would stay with Anna forever. Chris's back was to her, his naked body atop someone else's. Another woman. Her legs wrapped around his hips. Anna couldn't remember what was said, everything around her seemed to be moving at a hundred miles an hour. She escaped to the kitchen, sat at the table and waited for Chris to join her.

He had pleaded as soon as he saw her. Anna knew she couldn't really have the moral high ground on this, not after what she had done in Vegas, but to see her fiancé in such a way had crushed her. But Anna knew for sure she didn't want to marry Chris now. She knew how it felt to be cheated on, and she was pretty sure Chris wouldn't want to marry her when she had told him she was no better.

She was calm as she told him about John. Her suspicions had been correct, he wasn't happy when she told him. It was then he said some pretty mean things, but all Anna could feel was a rushing sensation of relief. Relief she no longer had an obligation to this man. He mumbled something about money towards the wedding.

Anna wrote him a cheque and left that morning.

John was never far from her thoughts. It would be so easy to look him up. John Bates, a lawyer from York. He wouldn't be hard to find. But she wasn't sure she was ready for that. They hadn't parted on bad terms, far from it. But now she was single for the first time in her adult life. She had left the home she shared with her partner having just returned from travelling for six months. Her priorities should be getting back into her regular routine, and most importantly, finding somewhere to live.

Her mother had been disappointed when she heard the wedding was off, but then Anna told her what Chris had been up to and she suddenly didn't feel so upset. Her mother had asked Anna to move back in with her, but Anna didn't want that. She had a good relationship with her mother now, a relationship that they had worked hard to build up and Anna felt moving in together might harm the bond they had created. Gwen had been only too happy to offer her friend a place to stay.

'Come on, Blondie,' Anna heard Mary call from the living room. 'Happy hour starts in fifteen minutes.'

Anna rolled her eyes. 'Coming.'

The bar was bustling, what with it being a Friday night. Mary was on top form, haggling the fair for the taxi ride before managing to convince a group of four men to buy her and her friends a drink. Anna was trying really hard to get into the spirit of things. But she was quiet, she knew she was quiet and could tell Gwen had noticed too.

Mary had seen someone she knew, and had told Gwen and Anna to find somewhere to sit and she would come and find them later. Anna released a sigh of relief at this, perhaps a private chat with her best friend would make this evening a little more bearable.

'She's a whirlwind,' Gwen said with a chuckle as they found a table at the end of the bar furthest away from the DJ. 'I'm so glad you're back. She nearly wore me out when you were away.'

'It's been lovely staying at yours, despite the circumstances it came about in.'

'I'd had my suspicions about the weasel,' Gwen replied, knowing Anna was implying about Chris. 'But he was always so excited about the wedding when I saw him.'

'He was excited about the attention we would have gotten rather than getting married, I suspect,' Anna shrugged, 'but I was no better in America. I slept with another man and you actively encouraged me,' Anna nudged her friend with her elbow. 'If you remember.'

'But that was because I knew you were too good for Chris,' Gwen tried to explain. 'You were way out of his league. The only reason you were together was because you had been since you were young and were all each other knew. That's no reason to get married.'

'No.' Anna took a sip of her drink. 'We got in way over our heads. And it took meeting another man to show me that.'

'Are you going to find him? This John?'

Shaking her head, Anna put her glass down on the table in front of her. 'I've too much to worry about without having to deal with starting a new relationship as well. I need to find somewhere to live.'

'Ladies!' Both looked up to see Mary walking towards them, feather boa around her neck. 'I've just run into a Hag party, gay men are so much fun. They are heading to the comedy club across town.'

'Okay,' Gwen offered Anna a worried look. 'Don't tell me, you are blowing us off to hang out with these men?'

'One of them is Gareth Huntingdon, from college. He dressed up in drag during one of the rag weeks, he's in drag now as it happens,' Mary explained, thinking this would impress her friends slightly more than they were now. 'They said you could come too.'

'Oh no,' Anna shook her head. 'A drink with my friends is all I wanted tonight. No drag queens.'

'But you go, Mary,' Gwen insisted. 'Anna is a misery guts and you'd have much more fun with them than us.'

'Hey,' Anna gently pushed her friend.

'Well, she's right,' Mary agreed with Gwen. 'And okay, I will if you don't mind.' Mary picked up Anna's glass, finishing her drink in one go. 'I'll text you later.'

'Can we go home?' Anna asked, turning to plead with Gwen. 'Please?'

An hour later, Anna and Gwen were sitting on the latter's sofa, sharing a tub of mint choc chip ice cream, Will And Grace on in the background.

'I can't believe you were right,' Gwen said with a mouthful of ice cream, 'this is more enjoyable than a night out on the tiles.'

'Nothing beats pyjamas and ice cream,' Anna replied as she scraped the tub with her spoon for more.

'Apart from being taken out by a rich lawyer,' Gwen remarked, regarding Anna under a raised eyebrow.

'I'm not talking about John now,' Anna replied. 'I am trying to forget about him.'

'I don't see why. You said yourself he practically confessed his undying love to you, how he's so selfless and utterly charming. I'm surprised you haven't tried to look him up.'

'Because I need to find…'

'A place to live,' Gwen interrupted, completing Anna's sentence. 'For God's sake, just live here with me. I have a spare room which was meant to be for any children that might have blessed my life. Well, the man I thought was the one left a couple after months moving in and I haven't had meaningful sex for about three years.'

Anna winced. 'You really thought Colin was the one? I never knew he moved in on the pretence of it being permanent.'

'He bought us matching robes.'

'Oh yes, the sign of any lasting relationship.'

'You're hardly one to talk about relationships, Anna,' Gwen commented, upon hearing her words Anna averted her gaze from her friend. 'Move in with me, please.'

'Okay,' Anna said, a grin appearing on her face. 'But I'll pay half of everything, Rent, bills, food. Everything.'

'Oh, I wasn't inviting you on a freebie. I'll go and get a pad and different coloured pens and we can work out who pays what.'

'Just when this Friday evening couldn't get any more wild.'

Anna shut the door of her salon with a slam, the alarm sounding inside as she searched her bag for her keys. What a day. She couldn't remember a time her appointment log was so full. She had many regulars, and a lot of these customers had said they had waited for Anna to come back before getting their hair cut. She supposed she must be doing something right.

Sure the alarm was set and the place was secure, Anna turned on her heel with the intention of crossing the road to her car. Gwen had splitting of chores on the agenda this evening and had warned Anna not to be late. As she treaded the pavement towards the road, she noticed someone standing beside her car. A man. It was Chris.

'Hello Anna,' he said, his tone level and totally void of emotion.

'What do you want?'

'To talk,' Chris replied, stepping towards her. 'You can spare me ten minutes of your time, surely?'

Anna looked to her left, Bernie was in his café busy sweeping the floor, despite it still being open for another half an hour. 'Let's go to Bernie's. Ten minutes only, though.'

Chris nodded, gesturing the path towards the café. They walked in silence, the bell above the door as they entered echoing in the quiet. Bernie looked up, a smile lighting his features.

'Good evening, Chris and Anna. Dare I hope my favourite couple have reconciled their differences?'

'Two teas please, Bernie,' Chris said in response, Anna moving to a table in the corner. The man nodded, watching for a moment as Chris joined Anna before disappearing behind the counter. 'How have you been?' Chris asked once he was comfortable. 'Back into the swing of things?'

'I think so,' Anna replied, 'my appointment log is full to the brim so that's good. How are you?'

'Alright. Well better now I've made my decision.'

Anna furrowed her brow. 'What decision?'

'I've sold the garage,' Chris revealed, Anna shocked to hear his words. That garage had been his life

'If you needed more money after losing what you had spent on the wedding, you should have asked.'

'No, that wasn't why,' Chris shook his head. 'I can't stay here, not when every bloody thing reminds me of you. I'm leaving Downton, Anna.'

Anna didn't reply straight away, Bernie placing their drinks down in front of them before shuffling away once more. 'Where are you going?'

'My uncle owns a garage in Cornwall selling camper vans and the like, renovating them as well. He wants to retire and I said I'd take over the business.' Anna's eyes went wide at his confession, lifting her tea to her lips and taking a sip. 'I just wanted you to know.'

'When do you leave?'

'Next week, and…' Anna was shocked as Chris placed his hand on top of hers. 'I want you to come with me, Anna.'

'What?'

'I miss you like crazy,' Chris whispered, aware Bernie had resumed his sweeping of the eating area in his café, a few metres away from them. 'I'm so sorry ford what I did. And I can forgive you too. No one compares to you, Anna. No one.'

Anna stared at him for a moment, the desperation in his eyes, before slowly taking her hand away from his. 'I don't think so, Chris.'

'Come on, Anna,' he pleaded, chancing a glance over his shoulder to locate Bernie, before looking at Anna once more. 'We've been together since we were kids. We've been through so much together. We've grown up together.'

'And for that reason I will always love you, Chris,' Anna brushed a strand of hair from her face. 'But loving you is not enough. Not anymore.'

'I don't understand.'

'I met a man in America…'

'Yes, this John,' Chris said gruffly, folding his arms. Anna continued, undeterred.

'I met a man who made me see how a woman should truly be treated. You were the limit to my experience, and it took being swept off my feet by another man to make me see I need more. I deserve more. I deserve a man who doesn't see me as a trophy on his arm. John made me feel so many things you have never come close to doing.' Chris looked like he had been kicked in the gut upon hearing those words, but Anna needed to make him see. 'I'm sorry, but it's the truth. You didn't truly love me anyway, not how you said you did. Otherwise you wouldn't have cheated. '

'You cheated too.'

'I know,' Anna nodded her head. 'And I'm sorry for hurting you. But the cheating is why I know us getting back together would be the worse thing to do. For both of us.'

'Are you seeing this John now, then? The man who makes you feel so much better than I ever did.'

Anna sighed, looking to the ceiling, 'No, I am not. And I might not ever see him again. But at least I know when I do meet a man and fall in love, it will be with someone who treats me with respect, who wouldn't guilt me into something I didn't want.'

She stood then, picking up her bag and walking out of the café. Anna breathed in the night air, looking over her shoulder to see Chris at the table, head in his hands. This was right. Chris had to hear those words. Perhaps it would help him to treat his next lover with respect. The respect John had given Anna.