"Well, Tamaki, I think we'd all like some more of that commoner coffee," Kyoya announced breezily. "…You'd better head down to the supermarket and get some."

Tamaki flinched. He hadn't been sure whether Kyoya was serious about making him the Host Club's dog for the next two weeks. Apparently, he was perfectly serious.

"Oh! And don't forget your new uniform." Kyoya walked briskly over to the changing rooms, and rummaged around in the seemingly infinite walk-in closet where the Host Club kept its collection of elaborate costumes. Finally, he pulled out a shabby old sweater and collared shirt, and an ill-fitting pair of grey pants.

"Kyoya!" Haruhi looked annoyed. "Those are my clothes! I thought you threw them out when you gave me my Ouran uniform…"

"Well, you never know when a commoner costume is going to come in handy," Kyoya replied with a sly grin.

Tamaki had remained silent for several seconds, but he eventually managed to scrape his jaw off the floor. "You're going to make me wear….THAT?!"

Tamaki stared at Kyoya, and, unable to contain himself, began hurling protestations. "How could you do this to me Kyoya, that outfit is the most hideous, most disgusting, most horrible thing I've ever seen! This is cruel and unusual punishment! What would-"

"You know, those are my clothes, senpai," Haruhi pointed out, with no small measure of irritation. "I really don't appreciate you saying they're disgusting."

Tamaki's face immediately reddened with embarrassment. "Well, I mean, I…it's just that…well…" Tamaki jerked his head suddenly toward Kyoya. "This is all YOUR fault! How dare you insult Haruhi by calling her clothes a commoner costume?! That's SHAMEFUL!" He marched triumphantly out of the room.

"Tamaki…" Kyoya followed him out the door.

"What?"

"You still need to go and buy that coffee. And put on your outfit." Kyoya thrust Haruhi's old clothes into Tamaki's arms, and shoved him back into the changing room.

Tamaki sighed deeply, and began to undress. He hung his Ouran blazer on a hook in the cubicle, and slung his pants over the top of the pink curtain that separated him from Kyoya. As soon as he did this, the pants began to slide over the curtain, and down onto Kyoya's side of the room.

"Hey!" Tamaki called out indignantly. "What are you doing with my pants?"

"I'm just going to hold onto your phone and your credit cards," Kyoya announced as he searched Tamaki's pockets. "You'll be taking commoner transport to the supermarket."

The color drained from Tamaki's face. Commoner transport?

"I've left you enough cash for the coffee and for a bus," Kyoya informed Tamaki as he slung the pants back over the curtain. "It shouldn't take you more than an hour."

Tamaki's eyes darted left and right as he sat, alone, in the bus shelter. He pulled at a loose thread in Haruhi's sweater nervously, and without realizing it, he began to make a rather large hole in the elbow.

He checked his watch. It would only be a few more minutes.

While he was waiting, an elderly woman sat down next to him. She surveyed him with crinkled, beady eyes through the spectacles balanced on the end of her nose. Eventually, her critical glare softened, and she reached into her purse.

"Why don't you take this, young man," the old woman asked him gently, as she proffered a ¥1000 note. "I hate to see a nice boy like you all alone out here on the streets."

Tamaki stared at her blankly for a few moments. Does she think I'm…HOMELESS?!

"Oh, please...I don't need any-" Tamaki lifted his hands in refusal, and as he did, the sleeve of Haruhi's tatty old sweater fell down to reveal his gold Rolex wristwatch.

The old woman immediately drew back her arm in disgust, and thrust the money back into her purse. "Why, you little thief! I can't believe I almost helped a horrible, thieving street-urchin like you! Loitering around, stealing other people's watches…what has the world come to?"

As the old woman concluded her tirade, the bus arrived, and she marched aboard in a huff.

Tamaki sighed deeply. I guess I'll be walking.