AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): Fumbling Towards Ecstasy by Sarah McLachlan, Never Grow Old by The Cranberries, Everything by Lifehouse, and Bleed to Love Her by Fleetwood Mac
FOURTEEN
o
Jack was sitting on the bottom step, waiting for Irina, when she found him. He stood to greet her and Irina was assaulted with what he was wearing. He was dressed in jeans and a form fitting black shirt that he'd pulled the sleeves up making them three-quarters in length. He looked damn sexy in black, as always, and Irina smiled eyeing his nipples harden through the fabric when she walked closer to him.
"I like that shirt." She smiled handing him the toast and juice.
"I like your boots." He raised his eyebrow and laughed. "Who knew you in Western boots would be so sexy? But now that I've seen you in them… I have a few ideas for them later."
"Really… I can only imagine what your mind is conjuring up Jack." She laughed as they walked towards the door. "I heard you mortified our daughter this morning."
"More like she mortified me. That's your fault." He opened the door and let her pass.
"How is that my fault?" She paused in the doorframe their bodies so close her belly was brushing against his.
"You've apparently passed on more then your stubborn tendencies." His brow furrowed as if truly disturbed by the thought causing Irina to laugh. "What were you thinking putting them in the same room, Irina?"
"Jack… when are you going to realize our little girl is all grown up? What sense does it make to put them in separate bedrooms? Would you rather have passed Vaughn in the hall last night as he was sneaking into Sydney's room while you were sneaking into mine?" She shook her head, chuckling at the visual that presented.
"No, that wouldn't have been good either, but I doubt it would have been any more embarrassing then our encounter this morning. I don't know how I am going to look her in the eye now."
"She's probably thinking the same thing about us, Jack. No child wants to hear about their parent's sex lives, let a lone have visuals. You're both equally mortified now, but you'll get over it." She tried to stifle another chuckle.
"You find this amusing don't you? And what are we standing out here for anyway?"
"I'm just sorry I missed the show and we're waiting for the car. Here it is now." She smiled as the black limousine pulled in front of them.
The older man from last night emerged from behind the driver's door and walked to the back to open the door for Irina.
"Good morning, Dmitri." Irina greeted the man in Russian with a smile.
"Good morning, Tsarina." He returned the greeting, kissing her hand as he guided her into the car.
The men nodded in acknowledgement of each other, but Jack could feel the cool under current in Dmitri's intense gaze as he guided Irina into the car and closed the door behind her.
"You're the one? The CIA agent?" Dmitri spoke in heavily accented English as he walked Jack around the back of the car to let him in the opposite door.
Jack nodded, suspicious but immediately feeling the 'protective' vibe coming from the older man.
"You were part of the team in Moscow?" His eyes boring heavily into Jack's.
"Yes." Jack answered truthfully.
"She almost bled to death in the back of my car that night. By all medical standards… she was dead." The old man looked pointedly at Jack, making sure he understood how serious it really was. "I don't know what your intentions are with our Tsarina… but I swore to her father that I would take care of her when she couldn't take care of herself, protect her when she was vulnerable… Do I need to protect her from you?" He paused with his hand on the door handle.
"No." Jack saw this man's fatherly instincts to protect Irina, who he obviously saw as a daughter, something Jack could appreciate being a father to a daughter himself.
"Good." The man smiled and opened the door for Jack.
"What was that all about?" Irina asked turning her attention to Jack once the door was shut. Recognizing the serious look on his face and hearing muffled conversation outside.
*Fumbling Towards Ecstasy *
"We were just clarifying some things." Jack turned his attention to the window, watching as they made their way down the drive. "Do you always travel in such style?" He asked looking around the inside of the limo, using her tactic of diversion to change the topic of discussion.
"No. Not always but," She looked down at her hand and then out the window. "I can't drive right now with my hand so it's just easier and safer for me this way. Lord knows I couldn't handle a stick shift right now."
"I don't know about that, I think you did all right last night." He smiled and she blushed turning her attention back to the window with a smile on her face. "Are you blushing, Irina Derevko?" He prodded stuffing a piece of toast into his mouth, smiling as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
"Jack!" She scolded rolling her eyes and laughing when she saw him sitting there, with his cheeks full of toast so full of himself. "You're incorrigible, I swear." She stole the toast out of his hand, taking a bite for herself, then handed it back as she brushed the crumbs off her belly. Her hands coming to rest there feeling the baby kicking, she smiled. "Watch," She instructed Jack, taking her hands away to allow him to see her belly shake. "She has the hiccups." Irina smiled at him as her belly continued to shake every few seconds.
Jack was mesmerized by the movement but also with watching Irina's facial expressions soften and glow, smiling down at the baby inside her. "Does she have them often?"
"Not really. The last time she did was about a week ago, I guess. She kept me awake all night… It tickles in the strangest way, I can't explain." She smiled up at him.
"What was your reaction when you found out?" He asked hesitantly staring into her eyes.
"Surprise of course, shock… panic thinking about everything that happened to my body in those months I didn't realize I was pregnant, hoping I didn't do any damage… Once I realized she was ok, I was thrilled… and then scared," She spoke softly and looked sadly out the window, "Sad of course, when I realized you weren't going to be experiencing it with me…weren't going to be a part of her life." Her mind flashed back to the horrible night he berated her at the house. She forced those memories out of her head and managed a small smile in his direction. "Pretty much the same gauntlet of emotions I ran before when I was pregnant with the other two…" Her eyes met his in a silent understanding. "What about you? What was your reaction to finding out I was pregnant?"
"Honestly, the first thoughts I had were of anger, jealousy, and sadness because I immediately assumed you were carrying someone else's child… The thought that our one night together in twenty years could produce a baby never crossed my mind in those first few moments. When I realized that the baby was mine… I felt ashamed for jumping to conclusions but I was still angry that you didn't tell me… but then I realized you tried to," He tucked her hair behind her ear, "And it felt like a ton of bricks had landed on me. Looking at the photographs of the sonograms for the first time… I fell instantly in love with our child." He offered her a small smile, his hand resting on her shoulder with his body still angled towards hers. She reached out to hold his hand. "I also felt guilty and scared, worrying what damage I might have done when I shot you… and I was saddened at the possibility I wouldn't have the chance to be a part of this baby's life… Sad that I wouldn't get to experience this again with you. Worried about you… worrying about you having to go through this alone."
"Are you still angry with me for not telling you?"
"No," He brushed his hand over her cheek, cupping her face and rubbing his thumb along the smooth curve of her flesh. "My anger with you for not telling me lasted all of two seconds until I realized what an ass I'd been and then I didn't blame you for not telling me. I'm more angry with myself then anyone."
"What do you mean?"
"I never gave you a chance to explain anything to me… or to Sydney. I was blinded to the truth by my painful, jealous rage. All those years, I had come to picture Irina Derevko as this hideous monster who wasn't human, had no emotions, was a heartless killer…it was easier to see you that way and feel hate then to live with loving the woman who betrayed us. I forced myself to separate you, Irina, from the woman I loved for so many years, Laura… It made it possible for me to go on without you. Be able to still love my wife in a way and yet hate the person who took her away… I know it doesn't make a lot of sense now."
Irina could feel her eyes beginning to well with tears but she managed to keep them in and let him finish.
"It took me awhile to realize that you, Irina, were the same woman I fell in love with then and it was Sydney who pointed out how hypocritical it was of us to judge you for doing the same job we did and if we were in your position… we'd do the same. We're all players of the same game… we're just on different teams. I look at it this way, I can either keep moping around for the rest of my life miserable about what happened in the past… or I can let it go, except it for what it is… the past, and embrace my future. We've both made mistakes, everyone does…that's life. I can forgive yours… if you can forgive mine… I know it will take time, learning to trust each other again…but I'm willing to work at it if you are…"
"Are you certain about this, Jack?" She asked terrified he'd back out.
"The only thing I am certain of," He took her face in his hand and looked deeply into her dark eyes, on the verge of losing himself, "Is that I love you, Irina."
And with his admission that he was in love with her, 'her,' Irina, her tears finally began to fall and he brushed them away with his thumb while he held her face in his hands.
"You are my match, my equal, in every way and I can't imagine my life without you." He spoke softly. "What do you say? Will you try?"
"I say… I love you, Jack Bristow… I've always loved you and I will try anything to have a life with you and our daughters again."
Jack felt her trembling beneath him, "Are you scared?"
"Terrified." She admitted.
"Me too." And with that he leaned in and captured her lips in a long tender kiss, just borderline needy, with both wanting more, and knowing it wasn't the time or place.
The car pulled to a stop and the two broke apart. They had arrived at the clinic.
"We'll continue this later." Jack planted another quick kiss on her lips before Dmitri opened the door to let them out.
"Promise?" Irina raised her eyebrows at him suggestively with her gorgeous seductive smile as they walked to the front of the clinic.
"Oh yeah…It's going to be all, 'giddy up and ride me, Cowgirl." He smiled and Irina burst into laughter.
She hadn't seen this side of Jack in years and thought she'd never again. "Smartass!" She said under her breath as she walked by him while he held the door, bringing back some of their old banter.
"You love my ass." He smiled and whispered just under his breath.
"I love your ass." She nodded and pinched his butt causing him to jump a little.
Jack didn't have time to react before Irina was conversing heavily in Russian with the woman behind the desk and found himself suddenly very turned on, and very much falling in love with the woman in front of him speaking in her throaty native tongue. Something he never thought possible before.
They were shown immediately to a room, and Jack realized it was because they were the only ones there. The office hadn't officially opened yet, a security measure no doubt. The nurse excused herself after telling Irina to sit on the examination table and remove her jacket, while Jack took a seat on the stool.
Less then thirty seconds after the nurse left an older man entered, Jack presumed to be the doctor, and greeted Irina with a kiss to each cheek and a huge smile.
"Tsarina… My dear, it's been so long. How are you feeling?" His smile was bright and genuine as he walked around through the door. He finally noticed Jack sitting in the corner and eyed him suspiciously.
Irina saw the exchange and answered the question she knew Alexei was going to ask. "I'm feeling fine, Alexei." She responded in Russian. "And this is Jack." She pointed with her eyes and a head nod to Jack.
"The American?" He whispered unsure if Jack knew Russian, his eyes grew wide with shock.
"Yes." She smiled and continued speaking in Russian. "And he speaks Russian. Jack," She motioned for him to come over, "This is my doctor and trusted family friend, Alexei Valishnikov. Alexei, this is my…" She paused unsure exactly what to call him.
"Husband." Jack finished for her, with no hesitation extending his hand to shake with the older man. Once again stunning Irina with his words and actions.
"After all these years, we finally meet." Alexei returned the handshake, still in awe of the man standing before him. "I wasn't aware you were still married, My Dear." He smiled at her as he attached the pressure cuff to her arm.
"Neither were we until a few months ago." She returned the smile.
"You never cease to amaze me."
"You've known Irina for awhile then." Jack chuckled earning him a sharp look from Irina for teasing her, trying not to laugh.
"Since the day she was born." He smiled at Jack who's turn it was to be shocked. "The most gorgeous baby I've ever seen. She was breathtaking then and still is today."
"You delivered Irina?" Jack asked stunned with the white haired man in front of him.
"Yes, quite by accident. I was only twenty-two at the time and interning in my uncle's clinic when her mother came in ready to deliver. She was the first baby I ever delivered completely on my own and I've taken care of her ever since." He beamed, proud as any father might be helping Irina lie back on the table to prepare for her ultrasound. "I was such a nervous wreck that night. I had seen Anya coming in and out of the clinic every few weeks for her check-up and was completely smitten with her, so you can imagine how nerve wracking it would be to deliver the woman's baby." He laughed as he squirted the gel on Irina's belly. "She was so sweet though. Here she was the one giving birth and yet she was the one calming me down. She said she had complete faith in my abilities…sometimes I wonder if that were the truth or if she just wanted that baby out of her."
Irina and Jack both had to laugh at that.
"But she stuck with me and kept me on as the family's physician. They kept me pretty busy over the years but none like this one, I swear one of these days you're going to give me a heart attack showing up riddled with bullets and broken bones…"His expression changed from light hearted to concerned in a flash.
"I seem to have that effect on people." She teased with a smile looking back and forth between the two men. "Alexei performed my last surgery." She clarified for Jack tapping her chest and scar.
"It's a miracle you are alive, My Dear." Alexei looked pointedly at her over the glasses on the end of his nose, "Speaking of miracles, how is our little Grand Duchess doing?"
"She's great and obviously growing as you can see from the size of my belly."
"Yes, I can see, but you're still tiny compared to most pregnant mothers. And that concerns me." He moved the machine to give them a better view."You carry her very internally and that concerns me only in the fact that when it comes time to deliver, she will be pressing up against your lungs making it hard for anyone to breathe but especially you because of your injuries."
"Are you saying I have to have a C-section?" Irina asked and Jack took hold of her hand sensing her distress.
"Not necessarily but a possibility… I just want you to be prepared should that be the case."
Jack and Irina nodded feeling a little more relaxed.
*Never Grow Old *
"Let's have a look at her, shall we?" Alexei smiled and moved the wand across her belly, the sounds of the heartbeat instantly filling the room. "There she is." He hovered the wand just above Irina's belly button and over the baby's face. She was sucking her thumb with one hand while the other was curled up next to her eye.
Jack felt his heart skip a beat watching his daughter on the screen for the first time. They never had a sonogram with Sydney so this was something new to him, watching his unborn child move about the screen while she was still inside Irina; "This is so amazing." Jack couldn't tear his eyes away from the screen and Irina smiled watching him in awe over their baby.
Alexei continued with the measurements, explaining everything that he was doing to Jack and Irina as he went along. "She's perfect. Absolutely perfect." He smiled when he finished.
Jack leaned down and kissed Irina lightly on the lips, letting his face linger just above her mouth before kissing her again, feeling an overwhelming sense of joy and love for her at the sight of their unborn baby.
"She's still smaller then I'd like, but that's not surprising considering everything." Alexei took a new photo of the baby, handing it to Irina. He wiped the gel from her belly and Jack helped her to sit up. "Congratulations, Child, you've made it into your Third Trimester. It won't be long now before we are welcoming her into the light." He took hold of Irina's good hand and gave a gentle squeeze. "Now… I will let Dr. Kuzhnetzov know you are here and waiting. Take care, My Dear." He kissed Irina's forehead, causing her to smile and nodded to Jack before making his exit.
"Who's Dr. Kuzhnetzov?" Jack resumed his seat on the stool.
"The surgeon who performed the initial surgery on my hand." She sighed, looking around the room, obviously nervous. Jack nodded and they waited in silence for the doctor.
A gorgeous man, roughly their same age, breezed into the room moments later.
"Good morning, Irina." He smiled at her taking a seat on the stool in front of the examine table, completely ignoring Jack. "It's been a while and look at this belly!" He reached out and placed a hand on her stomach causing Jack to feel a bit jealous. "How much longer now?"
"I've just started my seventh month." She looked over at Jack, seeing the jealousy brewing in his eyes and wanted to laugh at how preposterous it was. "Dr. Kuzhnetzov-" She began.
"Call me Sergei… please," He flashed her, his most charming smile, with his hand still on her stomach.
Jack wanted to reach out and choke the man for hitting on her, pregnant with another man's child none-the-less. Not that he could blame the man; she was gorgeous and was one of those women when pregnant that looked incredibly sexy.
"Ok, " she smiled politely, "Sergei… I'd like to introduce you to-"
"Her husband." Jack jumped out of the chair and grabbed the man's hand, shaking it firmly, sending a clear message to the doctor.
Irina continued to stare at Jack like he was an alien for his assertiveness at instituting his position as her husband.
"Husband?" Sergei raised his eyebrows but continued to smile. "And do you have a name 'husband'?"
"Jack."
"A pleasure, Jack. You are a very lucky man…to have such a strong, intelligent, beautiful woman take you as her husband."
'An insult to me hidden within a compliment to Irina, this man is good.' Jack thought himself.
"Easy on the hand, Jack," The good doctor pulled his hand away from Jack's death grip. "I'm a surgeon after all."
"Right… sorry." Jack smiled, feeling he showed his manliness, and resumed his seat on the stool.
"Let me have a look." Sergei picked up Irina's hand and began inspecting it while she shot a death glare over his shoulder to Jack. "Dr. Aguiar in Rio did an excellent job removing the pins. The bones have set well." He pushed his thumb into various points on Irina's hand. "Bend your fingers for me, please?"
Irina concentrated on her hand that was shaking with her efforts. She was only able to move her pinky and thumb fully; and sighed, frustrated, that her hand was shaking so badly and she couldn't move her fingers the way she wanted to.
"Try this." He placed a tennis ball in his palm, motioning her to pick it up.
She reached her hand out and tried to force her fingers to pick up the ball. They shook terribly and she tried again, this time she was able to pick it up by clasping her pinky and thumb around it, using the stiff rigid fingers in the middle to hold it there.
"Well that's one way." He smiled.
"Can you set it down?" He held is hand out again and she moved to release the ball with control but it fell from her hand and she looked absolutely defeated. "It's ok. Let me see your hand again." He ran the tip of his finger just under the tips of her three middle fingers. "Can you feel that?"
"No," she shook her head and Jack felt his heart sinking in his chest.
The doctor pinched the skin on the ends of her fingers with his fingernails. "How about this?"
Irina still shook her head 'no.'
The doctor sighed and forced her fingers into a bent position, causing Irina to cringe slightly, and when he released them they shot straight back out again. "I was afraid of this." He turned her hand over to inspect her palm. "I think some of this nerve damage may be permanent." He looked up slowly into her eyes and she nodded in understanding. "The knife severed too many major nerves. My hope is with time, they will regenerate and you will regain some feeling in those fingers. The reason you can't bend your fingers this way," He demonstrated with his own, bending them against his palm, "Is because the tendons and ligaments that run along the top of your hand have healed too tightly. After the baby is born, I should be able to go in and correct that problem. You're seeing a physical therapist for your chest injury aren't you?"
"Yes." She spoke softly.
"Good, I'll add some exercises to the plan to work your hand and fingers as well." Seeing the concern in her eyes he added, "I know you're concerned Irina but you've already come along way. When I first saw the damage, I thought you would lose your entire hand… You've managed to keep it… remember that. Time will heal the rest." He smiled genuinely.
*Everything *
When he left the room, Jack silently handed Irina her jacket, knowing she needed some space. She smiled and he followed her to the car.
As soon as they were on the go again Jack felt the need to break the silence. "So what's next on the agenda?"
"I have to stop at the University." She continued looking out the window, still lost in thought.
Jack wasn't sure why she needed to stop at the University, nor did he care at the moment. He could see her withdrawing into herself, lost in thought, in another time… another place.
"Irina…where are you right now?" He asked softly, already having an idea.
She closed her eyes and shook her head as if trying to rid the images she was seeing there.
"No place I want to be." She tried to offer him a fake smile. "It's nothing."
"You're thinking about Cuvee… aren't you?" He brushed his fingers over her cheek, tucking her hair behind her ear.
The corners of Irina's mouth turned up at how well Jack was reading her mind but she said nothing.
"We need to talk about that… about him." He felt her tense immediately. "He and Sloane are still after you."
Her eyes dropped to the picture of the baby, her finger's tracing the sweet outline. "Here," She looked up at Jack and handed him the photo. "You can have it. A photo for you to take with you when you leave."
"Irina-" Jack knew she was changing the subject from Cuvee.
"Jack, I don't want to talk about it right now." She snapped, instantly feeling guilty for her tone. "Please," The look in her eyes pleading for understanding.
Jack saw her struggle, and for now… he let it go, they would come back to that later. He nodded in silent understanding. He also knew she was right; he would have to leave in a couple days. "Thank you." He smiled softly, looking down at the photo and then to Irina. "Are you sure… you don't want keep it?"
"I'll make a copy before you go." She returned the smile and then fell silent.
The car stopped before they had a chance to discuss his leaving any further, leaving something else they would have to return to. Dmitri came around to the side and opened the door, extending his hand to Irina. She stepped out and took a deep breath of the cool, crisp air, wrapping her arms around her chest, warding off the cold… waiting for Jack to make his way around the car.
'St. Petersburg State University,' Jack interpreted as he glanced at the enormous structure in front of him.
Feeling him just behind her, Irina reached her hand out, waiting for Jack to take it. Jack saw the gesture and gladly slipped his hand around her long slender fingers, relishing in the feeling of holding hands walking up a University's steps again while students whizzed by them. Something they used to do so many years ago.
"It's been a long time." She squeezed his hand, reading his mind, smiling. "This was always one of my favorite things about the morning."
"One' of your favorites?" Jack smirked, remembering some 'favorites' of his own.
"Like I said, 'One' of my favorites." She smiled and raised her eyebrow suggestively.
They continued up the steps and through a large corridor, entering a secretarial office for the Dean of the school. Jack still had no idea what they were doing there but figured he would realize soon enough. The desk was empty as they entered the room, but a large wooden door opened and out stepped two women.
The taller one was approximately in her late twenties with dark brown hair and glasses, she was carrying a legal pad and pen and nodded with an enormous smile at Irina before resuming her place behind her secretarial desk. The other woman, a little shorter then Irina, and about the same age with blonde hair and blue eyes, flew into Irina's arms at first sight.
"Irina!" She exclaimed hugging her with full force that Jack could tell was a bit uncomfortable with Irina's current state. "It's been so long! Where have you been, I missed you last fall, you sent Peter, which was fine and look at you! You're pregnant!" Rattling in Russian, she stepped back, holding Irina's hands, smiling and marveling at Irina's new girth.
"Sasha, my friend, it has been too long." Irina smiled warmly. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to be here last fall but I was a little 'detained," She looked pointedly at Jack with a smirk, thinking about her time in the glass cell in CIA custody. "Sasha, I would like you to meet my husband," Irina turned and smiled at Jack, following his cue from earlier in the day that it was the title he wanted, "Jack."
Jack extended his hand to the woman, "It's a pleasure." He responded in Russian.
"The pleasure's all mine." She beamed brightly before turning her head back to Irina. "All these years you've been coming here…" She let the comment trail off, eyeing Jack once more. "Where ever have you been keeping him?"
Irina laughed, "I would love to fill you in on that entirely long story, but I am afraid we are in a bit of a hurry. I have to be at Peterhof at 10:30."
Sasha glanced down at her watch, "Then we'd best get to it, you only have forty-five minutes."
They followed her into the large office and took their seats in the two large leather armchairs in front of Sasha's desk. As soon as she sat down, Sasha pushed an enormous pile of manila folders, stacked neatly, towards Irina. "This is all of them. The other Dean's had theirs sent over last week and the ones from Moscow arrived just this morning."
"How many this year?" Irina opened one of the folders on the top, glancing at the student's profile.
"Two hundred and fifty-three new ones."
Irina nodded and continued to leaf through the folders, one by one. "How are 'my other kids' doing?" She asked without looking up.
Jack's curiosity was getting the best of him trying to figure out what was going on and who were these kids Irina was staking a claim to?
"They all have remarkable scores… these kids are amazing. They are all doing so well. These are all your copies." Sasha passed numerous stacks of color-coded folders to Irina.
Irina's eyes were beaming as any proud parent would, looking over their test scores. "I'm so proud of them."
"Oh," Sasha jumped up and made her way around the desk, "I almost forgot." She retrieved a box from the bookshelf and set it on Jack's lap, chuckling when he made a, 'hmmph' noise when she dropped the heavy weight on him unsuspectingly. "They all wrote copious amounts of 'Thank You' letters to their anonymous donor. These are all for you. They all needle me incessantly to find out who you are… I tell them nothing, like you asked, except that it is a gift from the 'Mother of Russia,' on my own accord of course." She smiled at Irina before resuming her seat. "Some of them are getting pretty close to the truth with their wild theories about who or what that could mean… I wish you could be here, Irina… To see their faces when I tell them they have nothing to worry about anymore. Their living and school expenses… their tuition, have all been paid for. The moment of sheer joy as they bounce around my office, hugging me madly… thanking me for making their dreams come true while other's simply faint." She laughed and Jack finally understood.
*Bleed To Love Her *
"But I feel so guilty… experiencing their joy, hearing their words of 'Thanks,' because it is not me who is making their dreams possible… it is you, Irina. It's such a great gift you give them."
"I don't see it as a gift, I see it as an investment, an investment in Russia to educate their brilliant young minds. It only hurts 'us' and our future as a country if we only allow those with substantial funds to attend University… we'd be losing some of the best minds." Irina sighed as she rattled on, "The best doctors and teachers, the best scientists and artists… and that all begins with an excellent education."
Jack was astounded by what he was hearing coming from Irina's mouth and yet he wasn't. 'Education of the youth and the success of a nation,' this was something he knew 'Laura' was passionate about which was why she was such an excellent teacher. Hearing the same words fall from Irina's lips only served to remind him once more, that 'they' were indeed the same and Irina hadn't lied about her passions back then.
"I couldn't agree more," Sasha twirled the pen in her fingers, "But it takes a remarkable individual to physically put those ideals into motion and see the change."
"Do you have the lists?" Irina pretended to ignore Sasha's last statement, wanting to take the focus off her self.
"Yes, I do." Sasha shook her head, smiling to herself at Irina's dismissal of any type of praise. She opened a drawer in her desk and removed yet another file and handed it to Irina.
"They just finished the addition to the library here, the sky light is stunning you should stop and see it… and they finished the one in the Medical Institute as well. The books and the space are wonderful but the leather beanbag chairs have been an enormous hit with the students. All hours of the day and night they are lounging around reading in them. That was a great idea."
"I can't tell you how many times I was stuck in the library studying when I was a student, and wishing for something like that…Something that wasn't so constrictive and hard as those old wooden chairs and tables would seem after three or four hours in them. I always thought I spent more time thinking about how uncomfortable I was then I did actually absorbing and thinking about what I was supposed to be studying."
Irina laughed at the memory and Jack could instantly picture her there, behind those big wooden desks with the green lamps, rubbing her aching shoulders. A sight he'd seen many times and could relate to.
"I'll look over all the requests and either stop back or send a courier next week. If you have any other requests just let me know." Irina placed the file in the box Jack was holding and moved to stand, as did Sasha.
"Actually I do have one more request," Sasha walked around the front of the desk to stand in front of Irina once more, "It's the same as always I'm afraid… I still want to have you teach our Russian and English Literature classes, you wouldn't by chance, have changed your mind and are ready to accept, would you?" She smiled in a way that Irina knew she was serious but still joking with her all at the same time.
Irina's only response at her persistence of the matter was to shake her head 'no' and laugh.
"No?" Sasha feigned mock disappointment, "Well, there will always be wishful thinking on my part, that one day, you will accept! You are still the only person I know who can quote the likes of Shakespeare, Hemmingway, and Tolstoy."
'Yeah, and she can also throw knives, kill with her bare hands and leap off tall buildings in a single bound,' Jack wanted to say and stifled a chuckle as Irina picked up a stack of files and placed them on top of Jack's box, adding to its weight, before picking up the remaining pile to carry herself.
"Sasha, it was a pleasure seeing you again. I can always count on you for a laugh. I wish we had more time." Irina smiled sweetly at the woman, placing a kiss to each other's cheeks in the Russian tradition, before making her way towards the door.
"Would you like help out?" Sasha held the door as Jack and Irina passed her, arms loaded with files.
"It's not necessary." Irina chuckled, "I brought my work horse with me today." She winked at Jack behind her. "Goodbye, Sasha."
"Goodbye, Tsarina." She smirked and Irina's head flew around. "Take care and God Bless you and yours."
Before Irina could offer a retort the office door had closed, leaving Irina chuckling at the woman and her comments. The thought of God blessing her, some how seemed absurd considering all she'd done in her life. But then again, she had her family back, sort of, and was expecting a healthy baby girl… those were certainly blessings. 'Did that mean she was on her way to absolution with God? If he was granting her these blessings?'
They walked down the corridor and Irina held the door open for Jack to pass, smiling madly at him with her deliciously seductive smile.
Jack's smiled immediately ceased in concern seeing a man approaching Irina with obvious determination in his eye. He'd obviously been waiting for her.
Irina saw the man and immediately tensed, feeling vulnerable with her arms full and pregnant. He stopped just two feet from Irina.
"I know who you are." He was staring intently into Irina's eyes.
"What do you mean?" Irina smiled trying to remain calm.
"You're the one. The one who anonymously pays for people's tuition… Educating Russia," He leaned in and took the stack of files from Irina, holding them for her while he remained rooted to the ground. "The Mother of Russia' as they call you and now I know why… took me awhile to figure it out… but the pieces slowly started coming together, I've seen you here… almost every year, getting these files… and now the 'Thank You' box… You're the one." He repeated in awe, a slow smile coming to his face. "The Romanov." Seeing the look flash across Irina's face he quickly added, "Don't worry… your secret is safe with me. I just wanted to 'Thank you' in person." He smiled. "I'm in one of those files. Nicholas Petrinkov."
Irina smiled and felt a sigh of relief flooding her.
"You've made my dreams a reality. I'm in my fourth year of medical school now, on my way to being a cardiac surgeon and if not for you… I would still be in Siberia… herding sheep." He laughed at the mental image causing Jack and Irina to chuckle with him. "I just wanted to say 'Thank you.'" He sobered, "What you've done… has and will change my family's life forever… I will never be able to repay you for that." He choked out causing Irina to get teary eyed in her pregnant state.
"Nicholas, do you really want to know how you can repay me?" She looked intently in to the young man's eyes, reaching out to touch his arm when he nodded. "Do your best. Continue to study hard and become the best cardiac surgeon you can be. Take care of yourself, your family and those less fortunate. That's all I ask in return."
"I promise. I will." He smiled through unshed tears.
"Good." She reached out to take the files from him once again.
"I'll help you carry them to your car." He started walking down the steps and Irina shrugged to Jack, why not let the man carry the heavy files if he wanted.
Jack continued to stare at her in his own private 'awe,' causing her to glance nervously at him every few seconds.
When they reached the bottom, Dmitri was waiting with the car and he took the files from Nicholas. He extended his hand to help Irina into the waiting car and Irina reached up and kissed his cheek before pulling him in for a hug, surprising Jack, him and herself.
"I can never say, 'Thank you' enough. I'll keep my promise." He whispered into her hair before pulling away. She smiled and made her way into the car, closing the door after her, and stood on the curb with his hands in his pockets watching them drive away.
When the young man was no longer visible, she turned her attention back to Jack who was still staring at her with a bewildering look on his face.
"What? Why do you keep looking at me like I have two heads?" She cocked her head staring at him with her steely eyes.
"You just continuously surprise me. So many things I don't know about you. You continuously amaze me. Just when I think I've you figured out… Life with you could never be described as boring." He was quiet for a moment then smiled, his eyes never leaving hers. "You hugged him."
"Are you jealous again?"
"Again?" Jack cocked his head to mimic hers. "When were you under the mistaken delusional impression that I was jealous previously?"
"Oh come on, Jack! You practically leapt off the stool this morning when Dr. Kuzhnetsov asked me to call him Sergei." She wanted to laugh at him in his denial.
"He was groping you! Putting his hands all over your stomach!" Jack moved his hands around in circular motions like he was caressing her belly wildly, his nostrils flaring.
"Jack, he is my doctor." She stated flatly, goading him and enjoying it.
"He was hitting on you! I'm a man; I know how his mind works. I know what he was thinking."
"And what was that?"
"He was thinking you're an incredibly gorgeous, sexy pregnant woman. And being a doctor, he realizes that a pregnant 'you' probably has crazy hormones and 'animalistic' tendencies while you're pregnant, which he would be correct in that assessment. He's no fool. His only mistake was trying it in front of me."
"Jack… you have nothing to worry about." She tried not to laugh and placed her hand on his knee.
"I'm not worried." His reply was a little too quick to be convincing. "And I'm not jealous."
"Ok, whatever then." She gave up.
"And you never answered my question." Jack interjected immediately wanting to take the focus off him.
"He was a good looking doctor, why not?" Her eyes never wavering, she could play this stubborn jealous game too.
"Oh please, he's Sydney's age. He's young enough to be your son."
"What do you want to know, Jack?" Irina raised her voice growing tired of his prodding. "I hugged him because, you're right. He 'could' be my son and I can relate to where he's coming from. A family with nothing, struggling to survive; wanting to break out of the vicious cycle of being held down because of your station in life. And I hugged him because I'm pregnant and hormonal, as you just kindly pointed out, and I felt like it! Ok?" Her voice was rising in decibel as she went on.
Now it was Jack's turn to feel bad for goading her. Braving her potential wrath, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her body towards his, her temple to his lips. "Ok," He smiled and felt her relax a little under him. "How long have you been doing this? Funding and supporting these kids… the universities?" He kept her body close to his, his head leaning into hers while she looked out the window.
She let out a heavy sigh, leaning back and relaxing fully into his embrace. "Since the fall of the Soviet Union and their system of 'free' education."
"That's almost thirteen years. You've been doing this for thirteen years?" Jack was shocked, mentally calculating in his head the expense of it all.
"Yes."
"That's got to be over $240 million by now you've given away."
"I don't look at it that way. I see the 3,300 kids who are helping to ensure a positive future for Russia. It truly is an investment. The best investment one can make is education."
"No, I agree with you completely. I just… I think you're remarkable for doing this."
"Not remarkable, resourceful."
Jack looked at her inquisitively waiting for her to explain.
"The majority of the money that's paying for these kids to become doctors, lawyers, teachers, scientists… is money from my organization…Russian Mafia money as you would say."
"This is what Katya was referring to when she came to the house…she said you were funneling 'that' money back into Russia to help the people." Jack nodded in understanding.
"Yes… through education and health care… many different ways. A public funding of sorts until Russia gets back on her feet again. That's the reason I started my organization… to take back what belonged to my family and use the mafia to help my people by ascertaining a certain level of control over the government. Under Soviet rule, life was restricting but there was order. When the Soviet Union fell, everything went spiraling out of control and people were suddenly starving. Something had to be done."
Jack remembered those days not so long ago and images of families digging through landfills for food fleeted across his mind. "So the government obviously knows about you."
"We have an arrangement." Irina spoke softly, raising her eyebrow that suggested there was more to that answer she wasn't willing to reveal. She turned her attention back to the window.
His gaze followed hers out the window watching the beautiful streets and canals of St. Petersburg go by, something he'd never taken the time to observe and appreciate while on missions in country. "I must say, I've been to Russia at least a hundred times over the years, yet this feels like the first. I suppose its because, for the first time, I am really seeing it, seeing its beauty…because of you. Seeing it through your eyes." He tilted her face towards him with his fingers, looking deeply into her eyes.
"I felt the same way when I came to the U.S., I didn't really see the beauty of America… until I saw it through your eyes." Irina's voice was slightly shaky, hearing Jack's admission, answering with her own honest reply. Jack took the opportunity to lean in and kiss her gently.
Once again, their moment was interrupted when the car stopped as they reached their intended destination. The large golden gates opened and Jack's face was nothing but awe as the car made its way up the paved drive past golden statues, fountains and lakes to stop in front of two grand staircases leading to an enormous palace.
"Welcome to Peterhof." Irina looked over her shoulder towards Jack as she accepted Dmitri's hand in exiting the limo.