"um what do you want to talk about?" she asked. Most of her wanted everything to be okay between her and Remus. But some part of her wanted to see where things went with Matt, but what she needed to decided was which part meant more to her.
"well I know you and Remus have had this ongoing thing…." he said.
"have NOT!" she interrupted.
"right… well Ryan this may be a bad time, but I like you, more then a friend." he said a smile on his face that could be read as nerves or he was on heavy drugs.
"Matt that's so nice, and I'm flattered, but with everything that's happened I don't think I can…pursue anything with you right now." she said a sad look on her face.
"Oh, okay, I understand. But is this because you don't like me or because your afraid of what people might say?"
"No Matt, I like you. I really do. But I don't think I can handle what people will say."
"then that's just ridiculous Ryan!" he said, his voice raising a little bit in anger.
"what do you want? Honestly I like you Matt. I want to be with you. But I like Remus to, and to tell you the truth I don't know if I can choose right now"
"well tell me when you can. But I'm not going to wait forever." and he walked away.
She stood there, the rush of students passing by, but still she felt alone. Tears started to fall from her blue eyes and her long blonde hair fell flat against her head. Her mind was so filled with thoughts about everything. Her life, the loves in her life, her family problems. She felt like she was trapped in her own mind, an eruption of emotions inside her head.
XXX
"So what we're you planning on doing with our day off, or did I skip classes for nothing?" Lily asked.
"I don't know but I was thinking going back to the heads dorm for some alone time." They walked around the empty halls hand in hand until they reached the heads dorm.
They ran inside like star-crossed lovers in some lame romance movie. She threw her hands around his neck and he snaked his arms around her small waist. She smiled as his lips met hers, his tongue begging for entrance. The stood there absorbed in one another, him moving her back until they fell gently on the couch. His hands exploring her body, unbuttoning her blouse reveling her lacy pink bra. He kissed her neck and she moaned in pleasure.
She felt his chest, his toned abs his strong shoulders, melted together to make for an amazing body.
"Lily I want you." he moaned as he kissed her neck, trailing down to her breats.
"James…." she started to say but got cut off when he started sucking the sweet spot on her neck.
"yes dear?" he asked, a devilish smirk on his face.
"we need to stop." was all she said pushing him off her, him landing with a thud on the floor.
"Um okay." James said rubbing his head that had had a rather rough encounter with the floor.
"Um okay, that's all your going to say?" she was worried.
"yea I don't want to rush you. I've waited so long for this, I can wait a little long for that." he said smiling.
"But you've got me all hot and riled up so I'm going to go take a walk, be back in a little."
"Kay…."
He started to walk away, until he heard a small voice utter, "oh yea and James."
"Yea Lily?"
"I love you"
"I love you to."
With that he walked off to the place where he could truly think, the astronomy tower.
XXX
Clare ran away from the dorm room not caring who she ran into. Sirius Calling after her the whole way. She ran until she reached the astronomy tower, she was out of breathe and perspiration had begun to accumulate on her chest. She leaned against the cold hard wall, sinking down till she was a little girl, sitting, crying her eyes out on the floor.
She couldn't believe he would do such a thing. How could she have been so stupid! She knew he was a player, a man whore, he had slept with most of the school. She just couldn't take it anymore, nothing made sense.
"Clare?"
"Mmm.." she said looking up with big red eyes, wiping the tears on her face.
"What's wrong? And don't tell me nothing because people just don't cry for the hell of it."
"Actually its Sirius."
"Ah, I see what about that whole situation seems to be troubling you?"
"He slept with Kelly Preston." she said, and to tell you the truth saying it hurt more then it actually happening. It was like she was finally admitting it, to the world, to the school, to herself.
"Are you sure?"
"Yea, I went looking for him and asked Kelly where he was, then she told me they had sex. I didn't believe her so I went to go look for him. When I found him he was in his dorm, sleeping in his boxers, just like she said. When I asked he said they didn't, but for some reason I just couldn't believe him."
"Well that doesn't sound like the Sirius Black I know."
"Really and what one would that be? because I don't like the one I just saw."
"Well the Sirius Black I know is loyal and caring. He would never lie to anyone he cared about, and Clare he cares about you. He would die to save the ones he loves. He loves to have fun and sometimes he gets a bad rap for it. But once you get to know him he has a heart of gold."
"You know you really are a decent guy, and a nice friend James. You really are."
XXX
A.N tell me what you think? New ideas???