Chapter 14: Home and back again

Dru hated saying goodbyes but even with these clouds of emotions floating over her, she still felt a little ridiculous.

Leaving her mother's room proved more difficult than she thought. Their smells were beginning to fade, but...this was the last place she'd been with them...safe and sound and wrapped up in one another's arms as they had always been when they had been scared. She doubted she'd need the sheet on the journey, but had spent an extra hour awake, just breathing in their scents.

This was the place they'd felt most connected to their mother and to one another when it was needed the most. And she had to say goodbye to it.

Taking a deep breath, she secured her pouch around her waist one last time and looked at her feet.

"...thank you. For...taking care of us."

'Are you talking to a room, Toad?'

She rolled her eyes and turned away.

"Yes, I bloody well am," she mumbled as her hand landed on the door handle, but hesitated in turning it, "it's not just a room though. It's more than that."

She sighed when she heard laughter echo around. She was being silly, but she would always be connected to this room. Good memories as well as bad.

She finally turned the handle, opened the door and stepped outside-

"Well, that's good timing!"

She jumped and made a garbled, startling noise.

Dain was standing right in front of her, his arms folded neatly and two guards stationed behind him.

Dru got her composure back and glared at him.

"Uncle Dain...please don't do that," it felt like all the hairs on her body that had been standing up at his scare suddenly went down as she allowed herself to relax, "I would very much like to leave my room without keeling over."

"Oh, aye'...and, uh, where is it exactly you're going?"

Dru knew this would be awkward. She hadn't exactly told anyone of her plans to leave today and she hated to admit she was taking the cowards way out by trying to sneak off. But after saying goodbye to her brothers and shutting herself back in their mother's room, Bilbo had come to see her. He had meant to say goodbye to her, but she forcibly invited herself along, explaining how she had to get back home. He had actually agreed, thinking it was for the best that she has someone to look after her (to which Dru actually managed a small, but real smile). He had been surprised when she'd asked him to keep it a secret from the others that she was leaving. She was hoping that she could wait outside Dale as he said his goodbyes. He hadn't understood her request but agreed anyway. Both didn't know that someone was listening in on their conversation, just outside the door.

She pulled herself back to reality when she realised she had been so lost in thought, she hadn't actually answered Dain.

"Home."

There. She kept it small, simple but to the point. She wasn't going to make up lies or give him a whole speech, because that's not who he was. He wasn't Thorin, he was Dain and he always appreciated it when she was perfectly honest with him.

He nodded and pursed his lips, deep in thought.

"Aye', I had a feeling," his hand came up to stroke thoughtfully at his beard, "and I suppose there is no way I could convince you to stay and advise your Uncle?"

She shook her head.

"No. I...I need to go home to Mam," she looked into his eyes and just hoped that for once, he wouldn't be the most stubborn one in her family, "and you've got Balin for that...he'll-he's really rather good and he'll be a massive help to you."

Dain nodded in agreement and let his hand fall away.

"Well then, there's only one thing for it," he took a step towards her and she already knew what was coming, "you young lady, better keep yourself bloody safe!"

His hands came up to her shoulders and she braced herself as his forehead connected with hers. Whilst she always appreciated the sentiment and usually a headbutt from her Uncle Dain never hurt, she had to bite down on her lip as the crown impacted more painfully than she was expecting. Of course, Dain realised this too late as he pulled away and grimaced at her.

"Oh...forgot about that," his hand moved overhead and she felt his thumb gently press against her sensitive flesh, "sorry. Good thing you've got that head of yours!"

Dru nodded and raised her own hands to take his own face in her grasp, her thumbs brushing over his cheeks.

"Thank you...Uncle, I-I know this isn't exactly ideal for us but," she tightened her jaw when she felt her lips quivering, before continuing to speak when she gained control over herself, "I'm grateful to you. For everything. For coming to help when we needed it and-well...for letting me go without a fuss."

Dain bestowed one of his rare, sweet smiles on her. His entire face softened and oh, how she'd missed that. No one ever saw him smile the way he would when no one else was around and that's one of the things he had in common with Thorin. They were formidable, strong and powerful and to the outside world, they were rather imposing figures. But then, when it was just them and family, they would unleash the most dazzling and kindest smiles.

Dru' flung herself at Dain without any warning, but he was ready. Her arms came about his neck and his around her waist and they just held onto one another, both feeling the other's slight quake in their embrace.

"I'll miss you," Dru pressed a kiss against her Uncle's head, "I'll come back, but...I don't know how long I'll be gone for."

"You take your time, Dru," he returned the kiss to her bundle of curls and squeezed her extra hard, just as he'd always done, "Give my love to ya' Mam and look after yourself for me, all right?"

Dru nodded and finally, they let go of one another.

Dain was very much like Dru, in the respect he hated goodbyes. So neither really said farewell. They pulled apart and Dru took a step away, giving him a small bow.

"Oh, sod off, don't you start bowing at me!" She looked up to see his lips curl in a scowl, "that's all I bloody need!"

A genuine smile spread across her face.

"Oh, but your majesty," she put extra emphasis on his title, "it's only right that I, your humble relative should bow-"

"Dru, go boil your head!" He turned away from her and began to march away down the corridor, but not before yelling instructions over his shoulder at her, "and don't even THINK of coming back here and calling me your majesty again, all right?!"

"No, your highness!" She shouted back and whilst she felt the layers of normalcy move between them, she couldn't help it as her tears fell, "I'll make sure to tell Mam to-to start calling you that as well, so she doesn't forget!"

His departing laughter echoed around her and she shut her eyes, trying to imprint the sound on her memory. Just holding onto it for a little while longer.

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"You know, you think you may be very quiet and that when you sneak we don't know you're there, but truthfully, we always know you're there."

Dru stopped in her tracks and took a breath to calm her beating heart.

She'd always made it without anyone else noticing her. Or, so she'd thought.

"The night back in Bilbo's house? Bifur told me later he'd seen you outside, hobbling about after you kicked a bench," Balin's voice sounded more amused than annoyed, "but since no one asked him about it, he never told...well, until the other night when you were asleep. He was so worried about you, he told us. Though it might brighten our spirits."

Dru slowly turned around to face him, watching as he slowly pushed himself up off his seat and walked towards her, his hands clasped behind his back in his familiar pose.

"So...a little birdie told me you'll be heading off?"

Dru winced and cursed quietly. Of course they'd know and of course, Balin would be the first to confront her about it. She swallowed down her pride and looked at him.

"I have to go home, Bal."

He nodded and stopped walking, standing a few feet away from her. He still looked tired and worn, but there was...relief there. Whilst they had a long way to go in rebuilding Erebor, the most difficult part was over.

"Are you sure about this, lass? This is as much your home as it is your Mother's and once word spreads-" She held up her hand to silence him.

"I know...I know word will have already started to spread and news-news will have reached her before I get there but...I can't let her be alone. Not for this."

Balin unclasped his hands from behind his back and held them out to her, his palms facing towards the sky. She slipped her hands into his and looked between them, unsure of what else to say.

"I understand. Aye', I do. But I'll be following close behind you, Lass. Not even a month, I promise," his fingers brushed over her knuckles, careful of the small cuts and bruises she still had on her skin, "someone needs to start organising the Kazut and safest passages and...well, there will be a few of my affairs and estate to tend to."

Finally, they looked back at one another and Dru couldn't hold back anymore, her hands moving up along his arms and pulling him towards her.

"I'm glad you were here," Dru sniffed as she pressed herself against his shoulder, "and I'm glad you're here for Dain. He'll need you and he'll listen to you."

Balin's hands moved to her back and he gave her a few, comforting pats that had her rolling her eyes. Sometimes, he really did feel like another Uncle, though one unsure of how to handle her at times.

A thought struck her and she turned her head slightly to lean her chin against his shoulder.

"Do the others know?"

Balin sighed and let his arms fall back, his hands clasping her gently around her forearms.

"I think it's best you go see them, Lass. They're waiting."

She groaned and pressed her face into the fabric of his coat, though he clearly heard her muffled exclamation.

"Oh, bollocks."

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Balin had left her to go fetch Bilbo, ensuring he didn't get lost by taking a wrong turn down the incorrect corridor or flight of stairs. Leaving Dru on her own to face the music.

It hadn't really taken her that long to find them.

They were all hovering in their familiar pairs or small groups by the entrance, though Dru counted only eight. She took another count as she stepped towards a shadowy alcove and-

"Are ye' sure?"

She jumped for the second time that morning and whirled around to find Dwalin staring down at her, his arms folded across his wide chest.

"Bloody Mahal, people need to STOP doing that!" She growled and glared up at him, though he seemed unfazed by her sudden proclamation and took a step closer to her, his arms unfolding and settling down by his sides.

"Are ye' really sure you want to do this?"

Her glare softened and she nodded, unable to tell him she was leaving him. So she did something, she hadn't done since she was a little girl. She raised her arms out towards him and silently asked him to pick her up.

He immediately went to her, his arms looping around her back and easily picking her up until her feet hovered a few inches off of the floor. Her arms wrapped around his strong shoulders and she wanted to stay then. She wanted to stay safe in his arms, never being put down.

She felt his shoulders tremble and a quiet noise escaped his lips and she whispered close to his ear, "Please don't cry Uncle Dwa', you make it so hard for me to not cry."

He didn't reply but buried his own face into the mass of curls she'd carefully cut away at the night before, everything now neatened and laying just above her shoulders. She let him cry against her for a few moments and felt her own tears fall again, though her own seemed more controlled than Dwalin's. That surprised her.

He finally put her back down on the ground but maintained his hold on her. Her hands rubbed soothing circles on top of his back and she was half tempted to make 'shushing' noises but had a feeling he wouldn't appreciate it.

"Dwa'...you have to let me go now."

"Not yet," she heard him whisper and he paused for a moment before confessing, "at least, wait until I've stopped crying. This lot will never let me live it down."

'We'll never let him live it down!'

She bit down on her lip to stop the wide smile that threatened to break when Fili's voice sounded in her mind and she could actually, picture his amused grin at the sight of Dwalin crying.

After a few moments more, Dwalin pulled away and moved back into the shadows, his tears obscured by the darkness. She turned away from him and moved along to the groups, giving him time to compose himself more.

Ori was the first to step in front of her.

"Druili," he didn't know where to look, nor did he seem to know how to say farewell to her, "I-I never said how much I admired you. I-I don't know what we would have done without you."

Dru felt a pang in her chest as he said this, because to her, maybe if she hadn't been there, things would have been different. Maybe if she'd tried harder...

She cut off her own thoughts by just concentrating on the male in front of her. She placed her hands on his shoulders and made him look into her own eyes.

"Ori, keep writing. I want to read EVERYTHING," she leant forward to place a small kiss against his cheek, "I want to read it all, from the very beginning. I want my own book, signed personally by you."

He smiled at her and brushed back her hair, tucking it as best he could behind her ear.

"I'll let you read it first. I promise."

He let her go as his brother moved forward and his hands automatically captured hers, bringing them close to his face and placing a kiss against each of her fingers.

"Oh Dori, you're such a gentleman," she couldn't help the breathless laugh as he stopped and held her hands between them, afraid to let her go, "I wish we'd talked more and I wish I could have some more of your delicious tea."

"When you come back, I'll make you an extra special blend, summer berries" he let her fingers slip from his and didn't hide his tears as they fell down his round cheeks.

She didn't have the heart to tell him she didn't know when she'd be back but did say she looked forward to it.

Nori stepped in front of her and before she could say anything, he grabbed her hand in his and shoved something small and metal into her palm.

"Keep it. Remember me whenever you look at your beautiful face."

Dru was stunned. He'd never said anything so complimentary to her, nor really anything nice. The memory of his cheeky comment before she realised Bilbo had braided her hair flowed into her mind and she smiled up at him, her hand clasping around the small mirror he had given her.

"I could never forget you, Nori," He seemed to put up with the kiss she planted firmly on his cheek, though she could have sworn she saw a watery sheen in his eyes. She tucked the mirror into the pouch at her hip and sealed it shut, ensuring she didn't lose her precious gift.

She moved aside to find Gloin and Oin standing before her, both unsure of how to approach her. She placed her hand on Gloin's shoulder and remembered his son.

"Your lad...Gimli...when I return, I hope to meet him," she took a breath to stop her voice shaking, "because I'm going to tell him how wonderful his father was. What a great warrior we had and...how tight he was with his money."

His short bark of laughter made her smile again and she could say no more to him. She truly wished she'd talked more with the company and gotten to know them better as individuals.

But when she moved to Oin, those worried and uncertain feelings fled. Without pausing, her arms wrapped around him and he stumbled back in surprise, his arms grabbing on to her, more for support encase she fell.

Dru's tears came again and she remembered just what he had done for her. For Kili.

"I never thanked you...for Lake-town, I never-never properly thanked you for helping him or us," she felt herself sob again and pulled back to look up into his face, "you-you were wonderful."

Oin did not stop his own tears as they fell, but gently pushed her away and turned his back as he tried to control himself. Apparently, he didn't handle emotions as well as Dwalin.

'That was...interesting.'

She knew that if Kili could have thanked him himself, he would have done.

She finally came to Bofur, who without invitation, began to dab at her cheek with a handkerchief she had never seen before. He winked at her as he lingered by her lips, his thumb brushing just where her beard started on her cheek. It felt very...intimate.

"Bofur, where did you get that?"

He pulled the handkerchief away and looked at it as though he hadn't really noticed it before, though she saw the mischief dancing in his eyes.

"That would be telling," he leaned forward conspiratorially and whispered, "I have to have some secrets."

She sighed and leant closer to him, intending to place a kiss against his cheek.

So she actually let out a small squawk of surprise when his lips found hers and pressed down quickly, before pulling away and looking particularly smug with himself.

'Oi!'

"Bofur!" Dru stepped back and covered her mouth, both in shock and to hide her wide smile at Fili and Kili's undignified protest.

Bofur merely shrugged his shoulders and looked unbothered.

"Had to take my opportunity, never know when I'll get the chance again."

She dropped her hand and let her smile shine out.

"Bofur, you are going to make someone a very happy wife some day."

As she stepped away, she could still hear Fili and Kili's grumbling of protest in her mind and thought of how they had 'protected her' down by the stream, all those months ago.

She felt two hands encircle her waist and gasped in surprise as she was tugged up and off the ground, a familiar embrace from one of her closest.

"Bombur!" She wiggled about and tried to look at him over her shoulder, "Bombur, turn me around so I can see you!"

Without even putting her down, he released his grip enough and turned her about until her side was pressed against his front and her arms came around his shoulders.

"Oh, my Bombur," she leant her head against his shoulder and inhaled the scent of his baking aroma, "I'm going to miss you...and your cooking...and your mad fighting skills and-and-"

"And my ravishing good looks?"

Dru let out a soft chuckle and snuggled in deeper to him. The comforting scents of fresh bread wafted in through her nose and it made her hunger for home more than food.

When he twisted her about and put her back down, she was set in front of Bifur. She'd noticed him at the funeral, but she hadn't really been seeing anyone else other than those that were gone and so she felt extra bad when she noticed he was missing one of his accessories.

"Bifur!" She exclaimed in wonder and looked at the scar in his head, "Bifur...your-your axe has gone!"

He huffed out a laugh and surprised her, even more, when he spoke to her, but in normal tongue rather than Khuzdul.

"Aye', and good bloody job too," he placed his hands on her shoulders and looked deep into her eyes as he said, "I was hoping you'd get better at the second language, but alas...some people are just more suited to the important words."

She actually smiled at him again and her hands rested on top of his wrists, holding on as she watched a small spark light up behind his eyes.

"Yer' the bravest female I've ever had the privilege to travel and fight with. Ye've got a fire burning deep within you that no one can extinguish. Brighter and hotter than any of the forges here. Don't you ever forget that ya' hear me?"

Dru nodded.

"I do...thank you, Bifur," she reached forward to tug at his shoulder, "come here."

She placed her last kiss against the side of his cheek, feeling how warm his face felt beneath her palm.

When she finally stepped away, they were all there. Watching her and waiting for her to say something else. The words stuck in her throat as she looked at them.

There just was not something right about only seeing nine of them.

But whilst they had tears in their eyes, they were smiling at her. No pity. Just love. They were not just her friends. They were her Kin. Her family.

Dru began to sniffle again and took a step backwards.

"Don't follow me out, ok. Goodbye, my boys," she put her hands to her mouth and blew them all a parting kiss, "My brave-brave boys."

She turned on her heel, walked out of the entrance and marched down the pathway, her tears falling down her cheeks and into her beard. She was sure she'd need to squeeze out all the liquid that had gathered in there that day.

She found Gandalf waiting for her on the other side of the bridge, a horse and two ponies waiting with him.

"Druili, so glad you decided to come," he stepped aside and held out the reins to her pony, "this pony I believe is called Marigold and I've been told she likes carrots, so we'll have to pop into Dale and see if we can procure some for our journey."

'Count on Gandalf to make everything normal.'

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Bilbo had not taken as long as she had to say goodbye. She'd sat on her pony and trotted away a few paces, unable to listen to his own farewells. She'd only just dried her tears and really didn't want to set herself off again. When he joined them and mounted his own pony, she couldn't help but give one last glance over her shoulder. They were all still waiting there, smiling and watching them leave.

She tore her gaze away and kept her head low as they walked away from the place they'd spent what felt like a lifetime trying to get to. They had won back Erebor for their own people to have a home again. But Dru did not know if she could ever look at this place and not see death around every corner.

Dale was busy. People were bustling about everywhere, tending to the injured and helping whoever needed it. These people who had lost everything, but reclaimed a town in which they could rebuild and restore themselves and start anew...these people, Dru envied. They had lost everything. And most had lost family, but they were there for one another. For them, they had found a place to call home.

The three companions were greeted joyously, most offering Gandalf whatever they could give him to pay for how he helped them in the battle.

Dru did not want to be rude, but she never talked. She kept her eyes low and to her pony and merely shook her head if someone spoke to her. She still felt a deep sense of shame for the way they had been cast aside by her Uncle when he was not well. He had righted his wrongs when he led the battle, but she continuously questioned every small detail of what had happened.

Would events have been different had the sickness not taken hold of him? If they had banded together from the start, the townsfolk, the elves and the dwarves...would they still be alive?

Dru's mind began to cloud over again with the dark thoughts, but before they could form and send her spiralling down into a quiet depression, her pony stopped.

And a small warm hand came to cover her own.

She finally tore herself away from her ponies mane and was confronted by a sweet, round face, with the softest and cheeriest blue-green eyes, she was so familiar with.

"I'm glad you came to say goodbye," Tilda smiled at her and moved her other hand to gently grab at a lock of Dru's hair, "and your hair looks very pretty like this."

Dru felt the wall she'd built up come tumbling down again and she grasped ahold of Tilda's tiny shoulders and sobbed anew.

"Thank you, Tilly," she managed to get out between sobs, "I'm glad...I'm glad you're you. Do you remember I told you? Don't EVER let anyone change you."

Whilst it was rather awkward trying not to fall off of her seat, she managed to lean herself enough to give Tilda one last, BIG hug. She smoothed the girl's hair down and shut her eyes tightly, as she took in one, deep breath through her nose.

"Tilda, you know what you smell like?" Dru couldn't stop the small chuckle that escaped her, almost hidden amongst her hiccups, "you smell like the sea and strawberries. It's an interesting combination."

She also smelled like smoke and fire, but Dru didn't feel it necessary to point those scents out. They'd fade over time, but the others wouldn't. They were decidedly a 'Tilda' smell.

She felt Tilda begin to shake in her arms and for a moment, she didn't want to go. She wanted to do so many things: stay with Tilda, run away from all her overwhelming emotions of this little girl and even pick Tilda up and take her with her. But she knew that she had to keep saying goodbye. Even if it was hurting her.

"I'll miss you," Tilda turned her head and placed a small kiss against Dru's cheek before pulling away to look at her, "you-you're my hero. You're better than any Princess I could have ever met."

Dru wiped her nose on the back of her hand and pulled away, trying to physically distance herself from Tilda, for fear, she would really never let her go.

"I'll miss you too. And-and keep fighting! I want to come back one day and see how well you fight!"

Since both girls were still clasping tightly onto one another's hands and sobbing uncontrollably without any signs of stopping (or letting go), Sigrid chose this moment to step forward and gently pry her little sister off of Dru (though Dru admittedly was holding on just as tight), before bestowing one sad, sweet smile of her own at Dru.

There weren't many words the two could say that hadn't already been said. But Dru remembered all she had done for her the day before and reached out to quickly squeeze Sigrid's shoulder before she could walk away.

"Thank you, truly." Dru meant it with every fibre of her being. This strong, brave girl was not a girl at all. She'd seen and done so much to keep her little sister safe and Dru felt like if she could sit down with her, she'd find they had a lot more in common than she first thought. But time is unfortunately short.

Sigrid gave her a small, polite nod before moving away. When Dru's eyes made to follow her, she realised that it wasn't just those two that had come to say goodbye to her.

The quiet, somewhat stubborn boy she'd first met in Lake-town stood before her and she couldn't help but give a shaky laugh. When he stepped towards her, his hand extended as if she should shake it, she smacked it away before pulling him in close to her, grasping his face in his hands and planting a large kiss against his forehead. She pulled away to look into his shocked and slightly red face.

"And you...you were remarkably brave. In the face of great danger, you ran into the fire to help your father and Tilda told me of your heroics during the fight," she butted her forehead against his own, albeit more gently than she'd ever done before, "you Bain...you are a true warrior. I am so proud that I got to know you."

Whilst she may have just called him a warrior, he was doing a very good impression of an awkward young boy who'd just been compliment by a woman years older than him. He finally seemed to regain some composure and power of speech as he said, "You-you're wonderful. You did a wonderful job in protecting us and-and thank you."

He seemed to prise himself away from her quicker than she had seen him move, even when he'd left the boat to go and join his father fighting against a fire-breathing dragon.

Speaking of which-

"I hear you've been teaching my youngest some colourful new phrases."

Bard suddenly appeared on her other side and she whipped around to look at him, expecting to see his usually calm features marred by anger.

But she was only greeted with a smile and soft, kind eyes. What surprised her the most, however, was when both his hands came up and held her face in such a show of tenderness, she gasped.

"We won that day...but we all seemed to have lost a great deal in the process. But no matter where you go, now you'll never be alone."

He let go of her face and pulled away far enough to reach into his coat pocket. He carefully pulled out a small, square piece of fabric, that to Dru looked like an old, dirty and torn piece of patchwork. It seemed to have escaped the blaze of Lake-town just barely, it's edges singed.

Bard grabbed one of her hands and pressed it into her palm, closing her fingers around it and holding tight as he continued.

"This was made by my wife long ago."

Dru immediately tried to pull her hand away and protest, "I can't take this, Bard-"

"You saved my children's life. She would want you to have this. I want you to have it," he leant in close to whisper next to her ear, "We may only be men and Dwarves, but to my children and I...you are and always will be part of us."

He let go of her hand as he pulled back and Dru protested no more. She brought her fist up to her chest and nodded at him, feeling hot and sticky tears fall even more. She wiped at them furiously with the back of her other hand and grimaced.

"Bard...could I trouble you for some water? I have a feeling I'm going to need more than I brought with me if I carry on like this."

Bard smiled at her.

"Certainly," he suddenly turned from her and signalled for someone to move forward, "load them up, they're ready!"

She watched in bemusement as a group of five moved forward and suddenly began to load up not only her pony but Bilbo and Gandalf's likewise.

She could smell food and her stomach growled in appreciation, though she already thought that her Uncle had provided enough.

"I don't-I don't understand-" she stuttered and turned to Gandalf for an explanation when he chuckled in his usual amused way.

"Gifts. A few provisions here and there."

"We have a long walk ahead of us. Well, walk and trot," Bilbo looked just as uncomfortable on his pony now as he did when they'd first thrown him back on one when leaving the Shire. When Fili and Kili had literally lifted him onto it.

'Don't start crying again, Piglet. You'll flood the place!'

Only Gandalf noticed her little chuckle that seemed to pop out of nowhere, but said nothing and turned back to thanking everyone.

"This will keep you in your journey ahead. Safe travels, my friends," Bard stepped away from them again and moved back towards his family.

Dru was thankful that they had been spared the devastation that she and many others were feeling. Their family was complete and together they could rebuild their lives.

Just as she had done with her own kin, she blew them a parting kiss before getting her pony to trot onwards.

She thought of Bard's words and kindness and realised that she wasn't looking forward to the journey as much as she had done when she had followed her brothers out the door all those months ago. The only thing she was looking forward to was the end.

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Weeks passed in a strange daze of sudden dawning and moments of pure and utter despair for Dru. Some days and nights, she would stop for hours and just...watch the sky or look at the passing landscape around her. And other days, she found herself sobbing uncontrollably, purposefully distancing herself from Gandalf and Bilbo when they tried to press her and engage her in conversation. Sometimes, she rode onwards with such fury, she'd wait for hours for them to catch up, but other times she would dawdle behind, feeling as though she were tied to Erebor by invisible strings and they were pulling her back.

She didn't mind travelling with Gandalf and Bilbo. When she wanted to talk or just listen to their conversations, she would happily join them. When they realised that pushing her to see if she was 'all right' was not the correct way of looking out for her, they eventually gave her space when she needed it.

The only part of the journey that had bothered her was five weeks into their walk and the sickness had begun. She would stop, slide off her pony (or sometimes just lean over) and empty whatever lay in her stomach from that morning or night before. It hadn't bothered her that much at first, she merely thought she was exhausted and everything was finally catching up with her tired body.

But on the fifth day of doing this, when she'd landed in the dirt awkwardly and her hands and knees accidentally got covered in her own vomit, did she do the Maths in her head. And she screamed and sobbed so loud, that Gandalf had told Bilbo that they would stop there for the day and night. Dru needed it.

Bilbo had wondered about hurriedly, preparing a fire, cooking the food and even undoing the bedrolls they'd been given. He also just wanted to give her some privacy with Gandalf as he seemed to be talking with her about something very important. He did NOT eavesdrop (Hobbits never eavesdrop), but he had picked up on a few sentences and comments that did confuse him a lot.

Gandalf had asked Dru if she was sure about her 'state' and she had said she was. He'd also asked her if she was sure she'd still wanted to travel onward, questioning whether she'd be able to handle the pony in her later stages. He hadn't begged her to turn back but promised he'd do his best to protect her until they reached the Shire. There, he would part from Bilbo and at her urging, herself as well. She'd made the journey well enough the first time on her own and she knew what parts to avoid and what roads to take.

Finally, when they settled in for the night, Gandalf had brewed Dru a tea that he not only insisted she drink all in one go but that she'd be getting it every evening from that point on. It wasn't the most appetising drink, but then she didn't want to argue with what was good for her. What would be good for them.

As the weeks slipped passed into months and there the journey continued, Gandalf couldn't help but spend days smiling about the situation. Dru wouldn't cry as much as she had done when they set off and he would catch the glimpses of her when she thought no one was looking. The way she smiled suddenly as if something amusing had entered her thoughts or the way her hand clutched at her belly and rested there, protectively and pondering.

It was even more amusing that Bilbo hadn't seemed to catch on. Even when she began to combine the food they had or caught, complaining that she couldn't eat the rabbit stew with strawberries or pomegranates. There were days when she seemed extremely tired and Gandalf would ride beside her, ensuring she didn't fall off as she slept as they rode.

Even with all her time up on the horse, she began to start getting the tell-tale aches and pains. Her back hurt, her hips hurt (to the point she began to ride side saddle some days) and her hands and feet began to swell. The plus side of the latter being, when they rested for the evening, Gandalf volunteered Bilbo to massage her feet. He did protest a little bit, but actually, Dru found him more than willing to be close to her. Dwarves may have been known to be excellent at massages, but Bilbo himself actually seemed to have a knack for it. He took pride in knowing he could get her to relax and smile as he told her stories from his childhood.

And yet, he still didn't know. Her belly, of course, was the biggest tell and grew substantially. But Bilbo had no idea, nor did he question her stomach. If he did notice it, he was polite enough to not ask about it, but then, she had been scoffing A LOT more food on their return journey than he'd seen her eat anywhere.

So of course, Gandalf was highly amused, much to the indignation of both Bilbo and Dru.

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The day had come. Over rivers and roads they had travelled together and towns they had settled into for a few days and eaten good, hearty meals. They had gone through forests, hidden caves and encountered many on their way. But they were now at the borders of the Shire and it was time.

Bilbo had clambered down from his pony and taking what he could off, let it gamble away and waved it off with a sad smile. She'd remembered watching him the night he thought no one had seen and observed the way he had snuck his old horse Myrtle an apple. For someone who claimed to not like riding ponies, he did seem awfully fond of them.

She didn't slide off of her own pony to say goodbye to him, though she wished nothing more than to be able to hold him close to her one last time. To be honest, it wasn't getting down that was the hard part, it was getting back onto her pony that was the difficult (and rather embarrassing) challenge.

She'd actually thrown a bag of lentil at Gandalf when he had the audacity to laugh as she attempted to clamber up without help.

So she brought her pony alongside him and smiled down at him.

"Well, Mr Baggins," she looked around them at the bountiful trees that had bloomed as if waiting for their arrival, "you're home again. Back to being respectable and a well-mannered hobbit."

Bilbo actually laughed and shook his head, "I think my respectability will be somewhat diminished if not dissipated completely."

They smiled at one another for a few heartbeats, before she leant over as best she could and grabbed the back of his head, guiding him to her. Her lips pressed against his cheek and she inhaled deeply that wonderful, definitive Hobbit smell.

Freshly dug dirt and pipe tobacco.

"I'll be round for that tea sometime," she pulled away very reluctantly, and could see his own eyes fill with tears, "I'm hoping you make some great pie."

Before she had a chance to slip her hand out of his hair, he grabbed her wrist and placed a very sweet kiss against her palm.

"You are invited to every meal. Even second breakfast."

"Thank you...Bilbo, thank you."

"For what?" He had a feeling it wasn't just for the invite.

"For being a friend."

They looked into one another's eyes and Bilbo knew that she didn't just mean that for her. She meant it for Thorin and all the times he had proved just as loyal to him as anyone else.

Finally, he let her go and she turned her pony back to trot away, towards the wizard who was smoking his pipe beneath a tree, pretending he hadn't been watching or listening to the couple.

"It's a long journey ahead. Rest up. Eat well. And try not to start any fights," Gandalf glanced at her and she saw that little twinkle in his eye. She couldn't help but tease him, one last time.

"I make no promises. You know trouble seems to find me more often than I find it."

Dru knew that was a lie. She would rest when she could eat as much as she could and avoid any danger that was set in her path. She would do nothing to endanger the precious life she carried in her stomach.

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Kazut - Caravan or Wagon