Chapter 13
Standing in the kitchen area of Cordelia's family pool house, aka her new place of residence, Faith repeatedly opened and closed the doors of the pantry, counters, and refrigerator, looking again and again with continued disbelief at the food and drinks, dishes and silverware she found inside. All of it now apparently for her exclusive use…all of it free of charge, no strings attached. Hers without stealing or begging, bargaining or striking deals…well, not much of a deal anyway, since her only real requirement was to not trash the place.
It was simply unbelievable.
Faith couldn't remember when she had last eaten food that required silverware, let alone used cups that weren't paper and silverware that wasn't plastic. And now she had rows of dishes and cups and plates and spoons, cans and boxes and bags of all sorts of food, not to mention condiments and frozen things, a microwave, toaster, stove, and dishwasher. Hell, she didn't even know how to USE a dishwasher.
And that wasn't all. She had a freaking table and chairs- no more eating on the run, or sitting on her motel bed while watching a TV with zero reception. THIS place had a small but comfortable couch, a side table with a lamp that actually worked when Faith flicked it on, a TV twice the size and 100x the quality of her motel one, and a rug that wasn't stained with cigarettes, mud, semen, blood, vomit, and whatever else had long ago obscured the original color of the motel room's carpet. Her bathroom had a tub AND a shower, without stains, was clean, equipped with supplies, and also twice the size of the motel's, probably three times the size. Her bedroom had a window looking out onto the Chases' huge outdoor pool, a full-sized bed with a nice blue comforter, and a nightstand, dresser with a mirror, and lamp, neither overly feminine nor masculine in its décor.
All of this had been for a servant- just ONE of the Chases' many servants. And it was the nicest place, other than her Watcher's home, that Faith had ever lived in.
From the moment Cordelia had announced rather than asked that Faith was going to move into her pool house, everything had become almost surreal to Faith, as if she were just imagining what was happening. She had been half convinced that she was hallucinating, or that it was another of Earl's games, and even now, exploring her new boundaries alone, it was just beginning to dawn on her that maybe all of this was really going to stick.
She had followed Cordelia out the library door almost struck dumb, her mind whirring with confusion and near denial, as Cordelia had flipped out her cell phone with one manicured hand, calling for a taxi that she then gave the address of her home to. Flipping her phone closed, she had instructed Faith over her shoulder impatiently as she started to slide into her own car.
"They'll be here in a minute, I'll be waiting for you to open the gates for you when you get to my place. Unless you're getting stuff from your motel first, then if you're doing that, you just have the taxi guy ring for me at the gate and I'll come out to let you in."
She had turned back towards her car, but then stopped suddenly, a strange expression crossing her face, almost irritated. Then she dug into her clearly very expensive purse and wallet, coming up with a ten dollar bill that she thrust in Faith's direction. When Faith blinked, more stunned than ever, Cordelia rolled her eyes, snapping out her explanation.
"Something tells me since you're so freaking poor you can't buy a Happy Meal or decent haircut, you don't have the cash to pay for a taxi either. Don't get any ideas, this isn't a freeby. I'm not an ATM, not that YOU would have a clue how they work. You're gonna pay me back, or better yet, Giles or Wesley is. There's limits to me being generous, you know."
Faith knew she should say thank you. For the money, for being rescued from the horrors of living with one of the British duo or from Buffy and her mother and their well-meaning way of making her feel like a complete loser. Cordelia might think she was a loser, but at least she said so to her face instead of hovering around carefully choosing her words and looking at her with guilt and pity. Cordelia might be a spoiled vapid bitch, but at least she was a spoiled vapid bitch who would leave Faith alone.
Faith knew she should thank her…she even opened her mouth with the intention of doing so, but somehow the words wouldn't come, and she cleared her throat instead. Cordelia didn't seem to expect them or seem too interested in waiting around for her to say anything anyway; turning her ignition, she merely yelled out the window to Faith, "All cigarettes, booze, or kinky sex toys STAY at the motel!" before driving away, leaving Faith staring at the money in her hand.
Within a few minutes, a taxi had pulled up alongside her, gesturing her inside, and Faith had distractedly instructed him to her motel, stopping to pack up a few things she would be taking with her to Cordelia's. There wasn't much- her clothes, toothbrush, shoes, weapons, and hair stuff, really- and in less than five minutes she was back in the taxi, on her way to Cordelia's place.
Faith had known, of course, that Cordelia was rich, but nothing could have prepared her for her first look at her house as the taxi drove up to its gates. For one thing, to call Cordy's residence a "house" was like calling a machete a pocket knife. It was four stories tall, seemed to Faith to cover half a mile in its length, and surrounded on all sides by a huge iron gate that required a code to be punched in for it to open. It was a freaking mansion, if not a palace, and one thing Faith could be sure of was that no vampires would get into THIS place.
Cordelia, upon being summoned by the taxi driver- Faith didn't even attempt to try to work the system at the gate- had let Faith in, telling her the code to get in with a continued impatient edge to her tone, as if eager to be done with her duty for the day and be allowed to finally be free from Faith's sight as she concluded with a reminder of all the things Faith wasn't allowed to do anywhere near her property as she let her around the side of the sprawling building to the pool area. She unlocked the gate there as well, and then the door to the pool house, before handing Faith the key. Faith didn't pay attention; she was too busy staring at everything she was passing by, unable to get over how MUCH the brunette had. By the time Cordelia handed her the key, saying "Don't lose it, because if I have to steal Daddy's to make you a new one I might just take the easier route and kick you out instead," she was attempting to focus more on the present, but by then, Cordelia was leaving, and the only thing left for her to do was look into her new place.
Faith had barely started to look into the rooms before the phone rang; she had jumped, not realizing she had a phone, and then hesitated as to whether to answer it. After all, whoever was calling surely wasn't wanting to talk to HER, how would they even know her number when she herself didn't?
By the tenth ring curiosity took over, however, and Faith had picked up the phone. It was Wesley, and he had indeed been calling for her. Obviously Cordelia must have given him the number at some point, or else the "trampy girl" Cordy's pool guy had been caught with in the hot tub had actually been Wesley. Whatever the case, he had said in a rather nervous, stumbling manner that Faith would now be receiving a weekly allowance from himself, as her Watcher, towards clothes, food, and other necessities. Faith wasn't sure what she had said to him in response, but both had felt so obviously awkward and embarrassed that they had hung up as fast as possible. Still, money every week didn't suck, especially if she didn't have to do anything for it.
Faith opened her refrigerator door again, not yet retrieving anything, but merely standing there, basking in the cold with her head slightly tilted back, her eyes closed. She couldn't remember the last time it had even been an option for her to do that…it must have been almost a year ago, back in her Watcher's house.
She was still standing there in front of the fridge when a drawling male voice spoke from behind her, sounding calm, but rather amused. "Looks like you're settling right in…everything works out pretty good when it goes by God's plan, don't it, Faith?"
If there was one sure way to shatter Faith's continued awe, the tentative peace that had begun to settle through her, that was it, for Earl to finally show up and give her a reminder of all the misery and mortification she faced at his hand earlier in the day. And now that he was standing there right now, smiling that stupid satisfied smile, Faith was damn well gonna show him how she felt, and she was gonna do as much damage as she could.
Spinning around on her heels, Faith launched herself directly at Earl, hitting him with a punch in the kidneys that was enough to severely disable most men younger and stronger than him in appearance, but which seemed to have no effect on Earl whatsoever. When he just looked at her with a raised eyebrow, Faith hit him again, her anger intensifying. How dare he not be hurt, how dare he stand there and look at her, just LOOK at her, after what he'd done, what he'd made her do all day?
"You BASTARD, you cheating cheapshot little BASTARD!" she yelled, punctuating her words with further blows and strong kicks to his shins. "You made me say all that shit to them, it's none of their business, it's none of YOUR business, you fucking BASTARD!"
"Well hello to you too, Faith," Earl said dryly, still making no attempt to fend her off as he stood there with his arms crossed, looking down at her calmly and showing no signs of pain from her rather vicious attack. "What's wrong, girl, you don't like the décor? Well compared to where you were, I've gotta say that this is-"
"Don't talk to me about fucking décor, you wouldn't let me fucking MOVE!" Faith nearly screamed, her fingers digging harshly into Earl's crossed arms as she thrust her face close to his. "I had to stand there like a fucking moron and hear them all talk about me like I wasn't' even THERE because you fucking FROZE my ass, not to mention set it on fire too, you bastard, do you know what the hell you made me look like, why the hell do you DO that, what the fuck is WRONG with you?"
"It got you here, didn't it?" was Earl's calm reply, and Faith completely lost it.
Seizing Earl's shoulders, her fury surging so strongly through her that she felt as though her entire body was vibrating with its heat, she started to throw him off balance, to fling him down to the ground to start in on him in earnest.
Only then Earl's arms suddenly enclosed around her, much more strongly than she would have anticipated…only then, Earl reached to hold her, stunned and immobilized, against him, before she felt everything around her spinning away from her as she started to disappear into nothing, falling away.
Faith tried to scream, tried to reach out, to struggle to break from Earl's grasp, but she couldn't seem to bring herself to move, and she was afraid of what might happen if she was able to manage. Clinging frantically to Earl's shoulders, her nails biting into his skin, she closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, her stomach dropping sharply as she continued to fall through time and space.
She was bracing herself for a jarring, probably painful landing, but it never came. Instead she was just suddenly standing again with ground beneath her feet, but when she opened her eyes, everything was different.
She was standing on a large platform of some kind, with marble white pillars surrounding it on all sides. It looked like something out of a movie about Greek gods, or something, like from Hercules…especially since the platform was located on the top of a very large, very tall mountain. As far as the eye could see they were surrounded by mountains and valleys of large heights….Faith could see no other signs of life, nor hear any sound except that of her own heightened breathing. What the hell…where were they? Was this place even REAL?
"What the hell?" she blurted aloud, scrambling back several steps from Earl as her eyes darted, careful even so to keep from the platform's edge. "If this is heaven, I'm REALLY gonna kill you."
"You wanted to fight me, Faith," Earl responded, setting his feet a little wider apart and slowly cracking his knuckles one at a time. "Here's a place you can go to it. So let's go, girl. See if you can hold your own."
Faith stared, entirely disbelieving, but he just looked back at her, apparently very serious.
"No way," she shook her head. "You're bluffing, you've got some stupid trick up your sleeve."
"You might lie, Faith, but your angel doesn't," Earl smiled, shrugging. "Against our code. You want to fight, well come on, girl, what's a Slayer like you against an old man like me?"
He was serious. What the hell was wrong with him, that he'd WANT to fight her?
"I'll kill you," she warned, lifting her chin, and Earl chuckled.
"Already dead, Faith, being an angel and all. Come on now, you ready to go?"
"You'll cheat," she said suspiciously, her instincts to fight already wavering at Earl's complete lack of resistance or caring, and Earl smiled.
"You use your powers, Faith, and I use mine. Sounds fair enough to me."
"No it fucking isn't, not when I can't set YOUR ass on fire!" she burst out with, and Earl chuckled, his smile warming.
"Alright, body strength only then. You think you can take me, girl? Then let's see it."
With a challenge like that, Faith and her pride couldn't' refuse. She dove straight at him, intending to tackle him to the ground- only to have Earl simply seize her arms and push her away.
Somewhat taken aback, Faith spun into a flipping kick aimed towards his spine- only to have Earl seize her foot in the air and thrust it and her balance back to the floor. Furious now, Faith sprung up with fierce determination, one hand seizing Earl's arm to twist behind his back and thrust him to the ground, the other reaching to dig sharp nails into his face. Somehow she ended up spinning away from him, almost falling onto her face.
Over and over this happened, with few of Faith's hits landing, and she finding herself repeatedly thwarted. As her rage and frustration grew, she found her movements growing wilder, less effective even as she tried harder, and in the end she wound up flat on her back, panting, eyes wide, but somehow calmer in her disbelief, her anger finally spent. How the hell could he do that?
Granted, Earl was breathing heavily too when he slumped down beside her, and she gave herself credit for that much. Still, she should have kicked his ass straight back to heaven, and she found his small, weary smile to be as irritating as usual, even with her renewed calm.
"Do that a lot?" she asked when she was breathing more evenly, her body aching, and Earl laughed, shaking his head.
"Only with people as pissed off and stubborn as you."
"Why, you set all their asses on fire too?" Faith smirked, turning her head towards him and rolling over slowly to her side, and Earl laughed again.
"No, but maybe I should have with the last girl I had. Name was Grace, Grace Hanadarko. Girl was hardheaded as a statue, and I think you still got her beat. And you're a good 25 years younger," Earl mused, shaking his head. "Gotta love a challenge."
"Grace, huh?" Faith raised an eyebrow, propping her chin up with her palm. "You got a thing for girls with ironic virtue names or something?"
"I've got a CALLING towards girls who are hellcats," Earl corrected wryly.
When Faith's eyes widened in surprise and she laughed with startled appreciation, he continued, looking her straight in the eye. "Hellcats, who are also lost girls with good hearts and instincts, and the potential to be someone great."
For a moment Faith paused, the quiet sincerity of his tone making her uneasy, unsure of what to expect, before she smiled quickly and carelessly, rolling her eyes.
"Nice try with the flattery, Earl. You're still a cheating bastard."
"Not trying to flatter you, Faith," Earl said steadily, still looking straight towards her eyes in an attempt to force her to hold his gaze. "Just the truth. I'm just telling you how things are. One thing you can count on from me, I'm always gonna tell you how things are."
Faith shifted her eyes away, uncomfortable. Who was he to tell her that…why would he say that anyway? Who would ever look at Faith Lehane from Southie and tell her that she could be great?
Maybe she had thought it once, when she was younger, when she had just been called as a Slayer and everything was different. Maybe then, when her Watcher had been alive…maybe she had even thought so too. She had said so. Back then, she had said Faith was special, that Faith was chosen…and Faith had believed.
But now? Now her Watcher was dead, and the way it had happened, the way Faith hadn't saved her…well, Faith wouldn't let herself think about it, not anymore, not ever, but it had been her fault. She knew that. Now she was only the backup Slayer, literally and metaphorically, and there was nothing about her that was completely unique or special, not even her powers, not since Buffy had them too.
She could say to everyone that she was above them all, that she was strong and powerful, chosen and special, rare and necessary. She could even say it to herself. But deep down, Faith could not believe it.
She had no family, no real friends, no education, no future except as Buffy's backup, and she couldn't even watch out for her own self, because here she was now, living in the servant's quarters of a girl who didn't even like her, because there was nowhere else for her to go. And the worst of it was she wanted to be here…that it was the best and only place she could think to be.
She didn't have potential to be great. She didn't have potential to be anything more than what she already was- second best, all the time, in every way. Good, but not great…accepted, but not needed. And definitely not loved.
Author note: Another long chapter split in two, I'll try to have other up once I've finished writing it