I do not own Criminal Minds or any of the characters represented in this entirely fictional story.

Chapter Fourteen

Finn woke up the next morning with a sore neck and a thumping headache. As she came round she realised a number of things: she wasn't in bed, she was starving, she was freezing and she wasn't alone. Rossi was still here, not that she expected him to leave any time soon. He was snoring gently with his head back and his mouth slightly open. Finn lay still for a while and listened to his breathing and hoping that she could fall back asleep but the rumbling from her stomach finally spurred her into action. Trying not to wake him, Finn slowly moved her legs from his lap and say up. She stood, still taking exaggerated care and re-arranged the blanket that had been over her, over Rossi. He stirred slightly as she tucked him in but didn't wake.

Finn looked at Rossi properly, quite possibly for the first time. Since she first met him they had either been arguing, avoiding each other or embroiled in the stupid mess that was her life. Of course it had registered that he was an attractive man. She had witnessed a smile lighting up his face and anger highlighting the wrinkles at the corner of his eyes. Unfortunately the smile hadn't been aimed in her direction but some of the anger had. He had that annoying thing going on where men with silver in their hair looked more distinguished than old. And, over the past few days he had listened to her, understood her, empathised with her and, more importantly, been there for her.

Finn shook her head and walked into the kitchen to flick on the boiler and kettle. She had no idea where these fuzzy feelings were coming from. Well, actually, she did but she definitely didn't understand them. She was perfectly sure that the only feeling she should have for him at the moment was anger; anger that he had opened up wounds that were already raw; anger that her colleagues now looked at her with pity in their eyes; anger that he had been right. But she also couldn't forget the fact that a lot of what she felt at the moment was relief. She'd spent so long burying her head in the sand about the whole thing and how it affected her that she'd come to think of the burden she carried as the norm. What she had no, and what had helped her sleep better than she had in years, was closure; complete, total and utter closure. John Chambers was dead and he couldn't hurt her anymore.

Rossi woke up alone and apparently unable to move his arms. It took him a few seconds to realise that he had been tucked into a blanket. Struggling to get his arms free he realised that Finn wasn't on the sofa with him. He stood, stretched and felt something crack. I'm getting too old for sleeping on a sofa, he thought to himself.

Rossi wandered towards the kitchen and was relieved to see Finn sat at the table. She had her back to him and a cup of tea to the side of her. She was resting her head on her hands. She had pulled her hair into a ponytail and he could see the tattoo on the back of her neck. As Rossi looked at Finn he wondered what the future would hold for her. He had no doubt that she was a strong woman but he wasn't sure she would get through this unscathed. She had already been through so much when the whole thing first happened and he had absolutely no idea what she had been through when she was undercover. When Strauss finally gave him the information he asked for she made it perfectly clear that he would have no access to the rest of her confidential files, just the one he needed. But Finn had been undercover for a long time and from the little Strauss alluded to she had been involved in some serious action. Everyone had a breaking point and he hoped that Finn hadn't reached hers.

When Rossi had first met Finn he had been that pissed that she was being thrust into the team that he hadn't really paid much attention to her. Over the past week or so he had done nothing but look at her. He found her extremely attractive which was definitely going to cause his some problems. When she laughed little wrinkles appeared between her eyebrows. When she cried her nose and cheeks got red. And when she smiled at him like she had done in the bathroom in Reno, his heart missed a beat. Yup, he thought to himself, he had some serious atoning to do if he hoped she would even consider thinking of him as more than a colleague.

Rossi walked over and touched Finn gently on the shoulder. She jumped and tried to wipe away her tears before he could see them.

"Finn, what's wrong?" Rossi pulled out the chair next to her and took hold of her hands.

"I don't know. I started crying and then I couldn't stop."

"That's hardly surprising considering what you've been through. I'm surprised you're holding together as well as you are bella."

"It's all an act Rossi." Finn snorted. "I've had long enough to perfect it. I'm like a swan; graceful on the surface but paddling like fuck underneath."

"Bella you need to talk to someone. Therapy maybe?"

"I've tried therapy Rossi and it didn't work. I can't talk to a stranger about this. It's too painful and embarrassing."

"Embarrassing?"

"Eventually they want to see the scars, to see what it's all about and then they get that look on their face. The one that says that they're both horrified and disgusted by it." Finn wiped her eyes again with her sleeves and rubbed her temples.

"Not everyone will be disgusted by it Finn."

"You'll forgive me if I don't believe you Rossi. I'm sorry but I just don't."

"Show me."

"What?"

"Show me. You know I've seen them already. Show me again. Let me see them properly."

Rossi could see the turmoil on Finn's face and wondered whether he had pushed her too far. He knew that the scars caused her pain, both physically and mentally, and he wondered if the trust between them was such that she would say yes to his request.

Finn followed Rossi into her living room and hovered by the mantelpiece. When hovering didn't work she began to pace. She still didn't know if this was a good idea or not. She knew that Rossi had already seen them but she was passed out at the time. Not she was definitely awake she didn't know if she was ready to see the look on his face when he saw them again.

Rossi sat back on the sofa and crossed his legs. Finn was obviously still struggling with his request and he reasoned that it would be best to leave her to her thoughts. He was beginning to wish he'd never asked her. It seemed that he'd caused her more pain than he's intended. And that he'd been doing that since the first moment he met her.

Finn continued to pace her way up and down the room for so long that Rossi thought he had broken her; that her brain couldn't cope with the situation and had closed itself down. When he couldn't stand it any longer he stood up and grabbed her by her shoulders.

"Finn please stop pacing. I'm sorry. I should never have asked that of you. Honestly, you're not ready for it and that's fine. It's too soon but please stop pacing and let me cook us some breakfast."

"David just let me get this sorted in my head."

Rossi sat back on the sofa and rested his hands on his knees. Finn turned around slowly and came to stand in front of him. Very slowly she lifted her top up and held it just under her bra. Rossi looked up at Finn's face. She had screwed her eyes closed so tightly there were wrinkles where there never had been before.

Rossi reached out and touched Finn's stomach lightly. She flinched and tried to step back. Rossi put his hand around her waist and pulled her back towards him. Starting at the top of her stomach Rossi traced the shapes on her stomach. His fingers moved lightly over her skin, barely touching. Finn's breathing slowed and Rossi could feel her relax under his touch.

"I don't think you are horrible or disgusting Finn. Scars remind you where you've been. They don't have to dictate where you go."

Rossi stood up and unclenched Finn's fists from around her top and pulled it back down. He put his finger under her chin and lifted her face to his.

"Finn?"

"I don't believe you Rossi. I'm sorry but I just can't." whispered Finn, dropping her head back down to look at the floor.

"Finn look at me. Come on, look at me. There is nothing in the world that could make me think you are disgusting or horrible. In fact, I think you are pretty damn perfect."

Finn looked at Rossi, desperately trying to gauge how truthful he was being. She wanted to believe him; she needed to believe him and she hoped she was putting her faith in the right man.