Prompt 160 - "eat your vegetables". Comedy, Rated G, Donatello. It's Halloween in February, oh well!

I saved a carrot, a zucchini, and a potato on Halloween. It was one of the more interesting holidays for me, indeed..

Our One Special Day always starts with Leonardo lecturing at our bottoms as we're climbing to the top, ready to explore the evening and see how many people we can get to say, "Cool costume!", "How long did that take?", or my favorite: "Totally fake!".

"Slam the lid on his trap!" Raphael, our conspicuous brother, was halfway down the street by the time I managed to ooze out of the sewer.

"I heard that! Stay close by!" Leo shouted through the hole and my left foot. "Where's Mikey?"

With one quick glance in Raph's direction, that was our cue to scatter like roaches. Normally I would be the well-behaved reassuring brother, but I wasn't going to hear his mouth all night! I had three hundred and sixty four other days for that travesty.

I admit that it's difficult not to walk in the darkness and hunker as far down in my shell as I could squeeze. It's like putting on a different shade of glasses, or maybe taking them off, rather, and exploring the same world but from another angle and in a wide range of colors. The smell is altered, too, and I like sitting in a random cafe with my laptop. I impress people with my quick typing ability in a "costume" and the way I hold and consume a raspberry muffin.

I found Mikey in an arcade, hogging one of the popular games, and kids offering to give him cash if he relinquished his seat. I smelled a money making opportunity and left all of my morals at the front counter. The amusing part was that Mikey never realized I was there.

Unfortunately I don't have Leo's negotiating skills or Raph's intimidating behavior (or breath), and the use of my intellectual tongue didn't come in handy with these kids. One kid kept saying, "huh?" even during the middle of my sentences, and enough was enough after fifteen minutes. I became one with my cockroach mentality and broke camp... with ten easy dollars.

As twilight bared down on my visible green shoulders, I passed a group of Dungeons and Dragons costumes, which some were very well crafted, and they gave me a thumbs up. I barely noticed since an attractive Strawberry Shortcake winked at me. My first thought: "Does she need medical attention?". Second thought: "I'm reducing my sugar intake. No, thanks."

I really had no direction on that night, and my brain was, of course, bouncing everywhere, soaking in all of the City Life that I never get to see from the other side. Then, I heard the familiar noise of a cry for help. Most animals are attuned to the sound of their young, but a ninja turtle is attuned to the sound of danger. It was like a reflex for me, and I tossed away the colors and lurched back into the shadows.

A ragtag team of bullies pushed on a little carrot, zucchini, and potato. The carrot was the loudest and flailed a lot, flapping its little orange arms until it could almost lift off the ground. Zucchini helped the carrot and frantically looked around for an escape. The Potato was a hoot! It rammed straight into a random bully's stomach, but bounced off the big guy and skidded all over the place. Poor little spud.

"Those are terrible costumes," I barked but said it more like I was talking to no one in particular, which I wasn't, "Better watch what kind of makeup you slap on your face. You could get brain cancer."

"Who said that!" the wild-eyed, short leader with a tangled purple mop for hair exclaimed, flittering his eyes around the alleyway. "Come out, jerkoff! Back it up!"

And that was over with rather quickly. I certainly "backed it up", and the leader was definitely wearing makeup. The vegetable kids gathered around me, parading in circles and in general awe over the spectacle.

Dirt-faced Carrot girl hung onto my belt and squealed, "Thanks! I'm glad you took over where I left off! They better be glad I didn't get a hold of them!"

I turned back to the heap of comatose bullies on the ground, just so I could gently roll my eyes at the kid and avoid invoking carrot wrath. "Oh yeah, you could have shown them..."

I felt my Bo being tugged in the back. Zucchini Boy was inspecting my shell. "You're like an action figure. Do you have other stuff in there?"

The edge of a potential nightmare drew near. I sighed, "No. Please get your hand off my butt."

Potato was of indeterminate gender. I can't tell the difference when kids are eight and dressed in costumes. She, I assumed, had a lazy left eye and a tablespoon of freckles on her cheek. "Are you supposed to be the Jolly Green Giant?"

"You can join our group!" Carrot jolted, spraying bits of candy out of her pumpkin bag. "We are different vegetables every year and do our best to teach others to eat right!"

"Like a food pyramid?" I cleared my throat, trying hard not to chuckle.

Zucchini and Potato lined up with Carrot, and oh for pete's sakes, they danced and sung a number! No wonder they were bullied.

Carrot tottered over to the bullies and left them each a candy on their noses. "My parents are dieticians and they also taught me to be nice even when others are mean and stupid." One bully groaned and flicked a hand, which sent Carrot right back to our party in a hurry. "But don't worry, Super Veggies, I gave them the crappy candies!"

"What's your name?" Potato blurted and stared directly into my turtle-y soul as we strolled away from any further danger.

"Pablo." I'm a ninja! I have a thousand secret names.

"Like in Picasso? Do you paint?" Zucchini tugged at flimsy strings on his costume. Carrot wouldn't let me answer, and I was grateful for it anyways. She bellowed their little vegetable song into the crowd and traffic, but this was New York, and that was acceptable.

The rest of the night, I acted like their stone cold body guard, but I scored some serious sweets and a few numbers since females thought I was their father. I learned that Zucchini and Carrot were siblings, Potato liked technology and history, Carrot wanted to be president and give everyone a kitten and a fresh supply of fruit and vegetables, Zucchini wore the costumes only to please his family, and Potato asked if I had a facebook. I almost wanted to take those kids home. Almost.