The next generation (Chapter fourteen)
By: Amee Eliza
"And why must I announce the engagement?" Ben asked raising his brows.
He had been working hard at cleaning his house for book club the following day and had been intercepted in his toil and sweat by Tom.
"Look the young man's already nervous enough, you might as well help him out."
Ben hesitated greatly but being pressed finally consented.
"What do I say?" Ben began sarcastically.
"Two lovebirds happen to fall out of the tree and they want me to announce it?"
"Yeah Ben. You know you got a love bird somewhere inside you I bet." He said in his old teasing way.
"Right." Ben said smiling.
Tom shuffled around and asked Ben if he had any beer.
Ben shook his head no, guarding the little supply he had left in his cooler.
"Alright I'll see you tonight at the cafeteria."
"Don't bother to come too spiffy though Ben. If you do your hair too well everyone might set their eyes on you and never take them off."
Ben didn't answer and then realized he was referencing his hair gel.
Ben bade Tom to go and Tom said alright.
Alex was reading a book in her bedroom.
"Alex, are you hungry?" He asked concerned if she would come or not to supper.
"No Dad."
Ben shrugged his shoulders and entered his daughter's territory.
"What are you reading?" Ben asked not meeting her gaze.
Alex looked up at her Dad tenderly for a while. She brought her Dad into her mind and the days they actually got along in harmony and spoke of issues on their mind.
"I am reading the Bible." She answered in a soft tone.
"The Lord is my Shepard I shall not want."
Ben gulped upon hearing the words.
He sat in trance for a while.
He thought of how his own life had been so contrary to the Bible. But he didn't feel bad, he felt a longing for something that could not be reached for him. No salvation was open via anywhere for him.
"Keep reading." He requested.
She squinted her eyes at the sight of her father siting next to her on her bed with her blue covers all ruffled and unkept.
She began reciting:
"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures; He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul; He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for Thou art with me; Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." Her voice wavered at times but Ben didn't notice. He only noticed the passion therein. The passion that he use to have. But that was gone. That was yesterday.
Then he recalled some old words: "Let bygones be bygones."
Where he had heard the phrase he didn't recall.
He arose from the bed and it squeaked. His black trousers and button up shirt gave him a professional look and Alex could help think for a moment that he was from a computer company trying to help fix her internet access.
"Alex, I'll see you at dinner." He choked out.
"Sure." She didn't say Dad but she wanted to. She lied back on her bed with her grey gym shorts and white tank that was thin and practically transparent.
She could not let herself seem weak to her father's will. He wanted her to say things to do things for him. The hurt. Where did it come from? She supposed it came from the lack of communication. Sometimes she didn't see her father for days or speak to him for that matter.
Would she become callous in time? What did she really want from Ben?
Ben is the side of him that she could not comprehend, the side that would never love her. Dad was what she needed, to be there and to comfort her in these strange times she abided in.
Ben went down the hall and avoided the mirror. He always had a strange inclination to look into it when he passed it down the hall but now he held himself back.
He put on his black shoes and decided to go against Tom's wishes and gel his hair. He spiked it and it rested neatly spiked on his head.
At about five minutes to six Ben headed outside. The sun could barely be seen as it escaped the sky to the horizon.
He heard a gun shot.
A girl was giggling and giggling. It bothered him a little and he scowled.
The green attacked his stale eyes and he stared at it for a bit but his eyes were drawn to the lingering sun rays.
Ben breathed in the air and noticed it was quite a calm evening. He was quite the same. His expression he wore was stale and his eyes barely shifted.
He walked to the cafeteria and recalled something Ethan once said:
"What would you do Ben if the island was took?"
Ben remembered asking: "Now why would that happen?"
Ethan frowned as if sensing the unseen.
"Cause you know I would die first." The words Ben had said scared him but he pushed them into the back of his head.
Jacob must be obeyed.
The words came from Jacob's will, not his own.
This menial had changed him. He did what he knew was for the greater good and hardly cared if anyone hated him for doing it.
But there was two who were in his heart and could not be wrung out. No matter how hard Ben tried those two could never go away from him.
These people scoped his underdeveloped sense of love and devotion. Devotion that he did not think he even possessed.
Ben entered the cafeteria and tried to go in unnoticed.
But that was a mess up; big time.
Colleen came up and asked him about the work in one of the stations and Ben replied simply as he could and Danny approached putting his hand on her shoulder and asking Ben if he would like a beer.
"No, thank you." Ben nodded.
The place seemed quite crowded. He wondered if they had all heard the news of the engagement and the special meal that would be served. The island inhabitants could always manage to make it to dinner for a good meal. Most of the times Ben did not enter the cafeteria for food but stayed home with his nose in books drinking coffee and slipping to the sea of dizzy diligence or he would attend business. That was the hardest part. Fixing things and people.
Ben caught sight of her. Juliet.
He approached her.
"Juliet would you like to come over tomorrow for the book club?" He asked as amiably as he could.
"Oh hi Ben. Book club is tomorrow? Sure, let me see if I am open tomorrow." Her hair was all fluffy and her grey pleated skirt and white t-shirt made her look quite adorable.
Ben turned his face away for a moment and then noticed Juliet staring at him.
He made his way to Ivan and asked him how work was going.
Ivan told Ben truthfully and Ben replied:
"Good I want you to start that tomorrow. Everything should be sterilized and clean in case of an event. Okay?"
"Yes Sir." Ivan answered. Ivan wore all black that matched his hair. It was graying a little from age but his face still looked untouched almost. The few freckles he had stood out and his eyes were kind but tonight they looked quite grimly boring.
Paula was serving the food and looked a little tuckered out. She wore her white apron as she usually did and her hair was pulled back in a bun. She served plate after plate. Ben sat down alone and waited for his own place in line.
Chicken, string beans, corn, and scalloped potatoes were served tonight.
The scent was intoxicating and steam from the boiling water rose up and hit Paula's face making her look sweaty. It trickled down her face and it was a bother indeed. But her arms could not wipe it. They must keep moving and serving, cleaning up sauces that happened to fall and getting down the glasses.
Ben glanced over to the table two tables to the left of him and saw Sam.
Ben approached the out of place young man.
"Are you Sam?" He asked putting a hand down on his table.
"Yes. You are?" Sam asked studying him. Sam didn't want to look at him but he did. His day had been quite stale studying algebra and he felt miserable.
"I'm Benjamin Linus." Ben answered.
"Oh you're their leader." Sam didn't know what to say and there was a sinking feeling inside of him that he was not capable of saying anything captivating to the leader.
Ben avoided answering that.
"Are you enjoying your time here?"
Sam squinted.
"I guess so sir but I am homesick. This island is strange. Never heard of it before." Sam hoped he didn't sound too outright or bold.
Ben nodded and told him he would talk to him later. Distraction came into Ben's head.
Thoughts flooded him. What was it like when he was a boy?
All he answered himself was: "Terrible." That was all that was needed on this plate of thought.
Then Isabel entered the building.
She looked out of sorts and nervous in her Hawaiin dress. The dress was black and had huge flowers on it. It was too big for her and it was not that flattering.
Adam was looking at Juliet and went to sit by her for a discussion.
"I was so frustrated." Ben heard Adam say.
Juliet nodded in understanding.
Tom nodded and gave the signal.
Aaron and Karl bursted in looking very exhausted. Sweat and dirt were on their shirts and face and necks. It was a decoration of show that they had had a wonderful day of exploration.
Ben nodded to acknowledge he had received Tom's signal.
"I would like to make an announcement." Ben stood up. Ben didn't look to even check if all eyes were on him yet. He didn't know if he would check. Why did that matter?
Everyone quieted when Tom gave a few scoldings. Juliet smiled.
"I want to announce an engagement. I have just been informed that Isabel and Herbert Pryce are recently engaged and I would like to offer my congratulations to them."
Ben voice shook a little at the end and he gulped.
Everyone clapped. Engagement was rare.
Isabel stood next to Ryan Pryce's younger brother Herbert.
Herbert was slightly chubby but had delicate facial features.
He wore a red shirt and looked lovingly to Isabel and got his voice out:
"Thank you everyone and Ben for your announcement. The wedding will be held in a month about and I hope you all attend."
Tanya was making her way to her table and bumped into Ivan. Her eyes apologized for the mistake.
"That's okay." Ivan said in his deep voice.
Ben made his way to retrieve his victuals.
He sat down and ate his supper quietly next to some very rambunctious young men who had a lot of inside jokes that Ben didn't understand. For all he knew they could be mocking him.
One of the men (whose name was Louie) asked the guys when the last time they heard of an engagement on the island.
One guy cracked up at the statement.
"I heard of flirting but never an actual commitment." Louie burst out.
Ben ate and said nothing.
He didn't even understand the feeling of good humor at the moment.
Alex was still not there. Ben left his seat and looked around. He could not see her.
He wondered what she did when he was not looking. But Ben knew.
All too well.
He calculated it all. Something was not right with Alex.
The thought of failure occurred to Ben. What more could he do?
He glanced over at Juliet. Goodwin was patting her back.
It was as if a light had flashed in his eyes of deep blue. Deep into the sea. Caught somewhere at the bottom of a black hole.
He turned his head away.
He didn't want to see or feel at this moment.
He ran his chest game in his head and wondered what he could do better next time.
Paula yelled something at Tom who yelled back:
"It's not my fault."
"Stealing food. Shame." She yelled back.
Alex came around five thirty and the darkness could be seen through the windows.
Karl waved to Alex.
"Sit here." He called aloud.
Alex smiled at being noticed and came to the table with her plate.
Ben left the cafeteria and went outside.
Ben saw someone on the bench but could not make out the face.
Warm air flowed about and his eye's adjusted to the atmosphere of dark.
This night it seemed something funny played tricks on him.
He kept seeing the past before him and the future seemed not important. As if there wasn't work still to do now. But he knew there was. There was decisions and actions that must be done and made by him.
This was his burden.