Disclaimer: I don't own them. Some days I don't even like them.

A/N: Since it's been a while, just a gentle reminder, this fic is shifting the timeline and supposing that Galahad did not arrive in Britain with Gawain's grouping but came to the island a bit later.

Laughter had not been the reaction Gawain expected, yet he could hear Galahad trying to suppress it. To his credit, he wasn't laughing loudly…but it was infuriating nonetheless.

"What is so funny, Galahad?"

"I am sorry, Gawain. I…just…" Galahad paused to take a breath. "If that is what you call a go-round between you and Agravaine…" He could barely suppress a giggle even as he reached over to pat his brother's shoulder. "What are our disagreements? Wars? Because, no offense, but that was…almost funny, Gawain. I mean, picturing you pleading with him to stay after his term of service ended." Galahad could no longer suppress his laughter, especially when he locked eyes with an infuriated Gawain. He wasn't sure why it amused him so, he just knew it did and he burst into shoulder-shaking laughter.

Gawain closed his eyes and gathered every shred of patience he could muster. He heard the coughing as the pup struggled to bring himself back under control.

"Done?" Gawain's voice was icy and Galahad knew he needed to sober up and stop giggling if he wanted Gawain's story to continue. Nodding assent vigorously, Galahad reached for something to drink, hoping that would help.

"For your information, that was not…it was not…" Gawain searched for words as Galahad studied him, unsure what his brother was trying to say. Running a hand through his mane, Gawain let out an exasperated breath. "Damnit, Galahad, don't you get it? There was more to that than the disagreement than me whining to him about departing."

Galahad held up a hand. "I got it, Gawain. Trust me. The little pup's head," he tapped his skull for show, "isn't as dense as everyone thinks. Sometimes." Instead of his bit of levity making his brother snort with laughter, it seemed to infuriate Gawain more.

"What do you want to hear about our go-rounds, Galahad? Huh? Do you want to hear about times I went after him? Or would you rather hear about the times others jumped between us and kept him from coming after me?" Gawain's voice was a snarl. "Perhaps, Galahad, perhaps you would rather hear about the time he tried so hard to convince me that a particular wench, the one that I got into an argument with Lancelot about and broke Ector's nose over, was not everything I thought she was? Do you want to know how he handled that one, Galahad? Do you?" Gawain had leaned in and was now almost nose-to-nose with Galahad. "He handled that by fucking her, Galahad. Agravaine fucked her and provided me with every detail – from how eagerly she spread her legs for him to how she'd pleaded with him when she realized he was only fucking her so he could prove to me that she was a filthy whore, just like the others who were only after a Knight, any Knight, to fill their bed." Gawain leaned back against the wall and his body shook, adrenaline pumping through his veins as furiously as it had been the night he'd listened to his brother's treachery unfold.

Galahad gulped. Now he was really very confused. How could…it didn't make an iota of sense that Gawain would be connected with someone who'd actually done to him what Lancelot always professed…

Gawain snorted as the adrenaline began to subside. "He did it, Galahad, to prevent me from making a huge error in judgment. Not out of malice, as Lancelot does." Gawain's voice softened. "It was a last resort. As I reflect on it now, I can see clearly how many times he tried to tell me, to talk to me…how Kay and Bedwyr and even Mouse tried… how my concentration on the battlefield waned and, gods forgive me, how it almost cost Kay his life. Agravaine knew I would never have been able to live with myself had that happened – to Kay or any one of my brothers. When the others gave up and I still would not listen, I guess he had no real choice than to force me to see…"

It was Galahad's turn to snort. "Can I ask you something, Gawain?" A piqued eyebrow was all the encouragement to continue that he needed. "What the fucking piss did you see in this man? He seems like some…" Galahad stopped, stumped for words. "I don't even know what he seems like, Gawain. Just some arrogant, brutal, bloodthirsty piece of shit that, no matter what you say, seems to only have been happy or content when he was harming someone else…namely, you. I'm sorry, Gawain, but that's my opinion." Galahad leaned back and crossed his arms, staring at the starry sky.

Gawain's vision blurred. How had he gone so wrong in translating Agravaine for Galahad? His voice was low when he spoke. "He was brutal because that was all he knew. Bloodthirsty because that was what allowed him and those around him to survive. Arrogant because, well, he really was that damn good. A piece of shit because you know as well as I, Galahad, that is what we are forced to be sometimes because it is what Rome wants. And what Rome wants, Rome gets – at least from her Sarmatian slaves."

A soft, sad smile played across Gawain's features. Galahad watched, still struggling to understand how Gawain seemed to have this worship for, in his estimation, a cruel and deceitful Knight.

"He stayed, you know."

Galahad was jolted out of his thoughts by the soft voice. "What do you mean?"

"Despite all his talk and all his insistence, when Arthur asked him, pointed out how severely low the number of Knights were and it would just be until shortly after the next group arrived and could at least be trained a little…he stayed, like Kay and Gaheris and Gareth and Mouse. Arthur held onto all their papers of passage, with the agreement that they could ask for them anytime they wanted and depart. But none of them did. They should have, but they didn't. Agravaine stayed and everyone else, well, they stayed because Agravaine was staying."

Gawain shrugged and tugged on a piece of bread. He wasn't feeling particularly hungry, but he needed to do something to transfer the feelings of guilt. He'd always felt partly responsible for binding Agravaine to the island, to this life – as though Arthur's favour had merely provided a convenient excuse for Agravaine to stay without suspicion that he'd gotten soft and was doing it for Gawain.

"Do you think he stayed because of you…?" Galahad found it hard to believe, but he knew a guilty acting Gawain and that was the only thing Galahad could think of as causing it.

"I don't know, Galahad. You see, Agravaine never wanted anyone to worry over him. He could worry over you, but it was not acceptable in reverse. So he would not have and never did say a word to me other than he stayed because Arthur asked and the shortage of Knights… He also never wanted anyone to feel indebted to him – well, except Arthur. He played the whole 'I stayed because you asked me to' thing anytime Arthur got under his skin really bad. If you weren't Arthur and he did something for you, or gave you something, it was because he wanted to – not because he expected you to do likewise or because he wanted to have something to leverage against you. I mean, he wasn't above bartering to get out of stuff he didn't want to do, like all of us, but if he went out of his way…that sort…"

"Did he give you anything?"

"Everything, Galahad. His knowledge, his wisdom, his friendship, his brotherhood, my nickname, many nights of laughter…" Catching Galahad's eye roll from the corner of his eye, Gawain laughed. "But, yes, he thought he was very secretive and sneaky, but it was well known he could be very generous to those he had an affinity for…"

A/N: So...the system is back online and I am trying to get rolling again with this story. I don't honestly think there's too much more before it wraps up but this is Gawain and, well, if you've worked with him, you know he doesn't shut up until he's had his full say... Thanks for coming back and reading.