It was decided that Alice should be kept in the hospital for several days in order to monitor her for any problems after her early labor and emergency C-section. The doctors were worried that they still had not figured out what had caused her pre-term labor and were concerned that a deeper problem lay somewhere. As a result, Alice had been subjected to a avalanche of tests and exams. These often included Charlie as they were worried that what ever caused Alice's problem could be related to him.

Alice didn't mind staying in the hospital for to long. It gave her more time to relax and focus on Charlie.

"Hey little guy." Alice cooed as the nurse wheeled him into the room from the nursery. The doctors had decided it was best that they were kept separate for the first few hours after his birth and as much time possible until they could figure out what was wrong. This could allow Charlie to stay in the nursery where he would be kept under strict watch.

The nurse handed Charlie to Alice, tucking him into her waiting arms. "I'll be back in a little while to get him." She said softly as she slipped out of the room.

Alice nodded, frowning at the fact that she was kept on limited time with her son.

Charlie let out a loud gurgling noise, playing with Alice's fingers. Alice laughed, his little face screwed up in concentration as he bent her fingers gently back and fourth. "Careful now, don't want to.. OUCH!" Alice jumped, pulling her fingers away from Charlie. The grip of his tiny right hand and clenched suddenly down on her with shocking strong force for a baby, let alone a new born. Alice stared wide eyed at the baby. "Looks like you've got yourself a sledge hammer of an arm there." She said softly. Charlie gurgled back at her.

Alice laughed softly, tickling him under his chin. Charlie smiled and giggled loudly, twisting his neck into her touch. Alice vaguely glimpsed his little dimple on his cheek. She choked back a small sob. "You look so much like your daddy." She whispered into his hair, kissing the top of his head.

"Alice?"

Alice looked up to see Carol striding into the room, a smile spreading across her face when she glimpsed Charlie.

"How are you cute boy?" She purred leaning over him to get a better look. He opened his eyes widely, staring at her with a strange face expression that Alice knew she would never fully be able to explain. Carol laughed quietly, stroking his out stretched hand. "He knows his grandma." She laughed. She stopped short, a likewise strange look crossing her face. "Grandma…" she said, rolling the words around in her mouth.

Alice laughed. "It doesn't have to mean you old." She said reassuringly. M

Carol gave her a light smile, glancing down at Charlie again. "He has you hair… your face shape too." She said quietly.

"He's got your facial expressions though." Alice laughed poking fun at her mom.

Carol rolled her eyes. "I have to say… I guess he has his fathers nose… It defiantly isn't yours." She said slowly, her eyes casting up and down Alice's face.

Alice swallowed hard. Ya… just not the guys your thinking of. She thought to herself.

"But…" Carol paused. "Did… wait…you have… and Jack…" Carol broke off, looking back and fourth between Alice and Charlie. Alice hugged Charlie closer.

Shit.

"Alice…" Carol began again, twisting to better see Charlie and prodding him with her finger to get him to look at her again. "Jack had blue eyes."

Alice felt like the world was falling in on her. Slowly trying to crush her with its weight. She knew this moment would come. It was such an obvious thing, frankly she was surprised that Carol hadn't noticed sooner. But now… now came the hard part. She had to figure out a way in which to explain to carol how her son, a child supposedly parented by two blue eyed people, with all blue eyed relatives (at least on Alice's side) Had such large deep brown eyes. Alice had thought of several different excuses, most of which involved things that quite potentially could back fire, and had come to one conclusion. Lie. Oh and Lie she would. Obviously it was the only thing she could do. Everything about Charlie so far was a lie. Who his father was. Where his father was. How he had dimples when Alice and Jack didn't. How his right arm seemed so unexplainably strong. Now it came down to it. Alice had thought and decided on her answer, one that had t be told no matter what it did to her. How much it hurt. Both for what she was about to say, and the knowledge that she could never reveal the true identity of the man she loved, of Charlie's real father.

"One… one night… It was a one night stand." She choked out finally.

Carol's eyes went wide. "WHAT!" She shrieked, jumping off the edge of the bed where she had been sitting and backing away.

"Mom… I'm sorry okay. I was confused after Jack left and hurt and angry and so I got drunk and apparently… went home with a guy." She spat out, disgusted by her own words as they flowed from her mouth. "I didn't want you to find out. I felt so ashamed and weak and … wrong.." Alice was crying now, the tears cascading down her face as Charlie began to cry, obviously upset of the lack of attention and the loud voices. Alice hugged him gently, trying to sooth him while watching Carols face burn first with anger, then cool, simmering down into that easily recognizable face of disappointment.

Alice looked away, rocking Charlie back and forth, trying to comfort him. Several long minuets passed, silence surrounding the room as Charlie quieted down and Carol continued to stare at her daughter.

"I don't know who you are anymore." She finally whispered. " All these things you have kept from me… what else are you randomly going to spout out next? How can I trust you" And with that Carol turned on her heels, rubbing her face as she left the room, slamming the door behind her as she went.

Alice la How can I trust you" And with that Carol turned on her heels, rubbing her face as she left the room, slamming the door behind her as she went.

Alice la down on the bed, curling on her side and hugging Charlie close to her. She buried her face in his soft hair, choking on her sobs as tears cascaded down her face.

The door squeaked quietly as it opened but Alice didn't bother to look up. A nurse entered her field of vision, peering at her with a startled expression. "Are you okay? We heard some people shouting from in here, then we saw your mom leave crying so.." She said softly her eyes darting over Alice and the baby.

Alice cleared her throat, wiping away the tears. "Im… im fine." She said slowly, stroking Charlie's head gently.

The nurse nodded slowly, checking her watch. "I'm sorry miss, but Charlie here needs to head back up to the nursery for another test."

Alice closed her eyes, resting her cheek against Charlie, breathing in his sent, and feeling the smooth skin beneath her. Charlie glanced up at her from where he was nestled. Brown eyes meeting blue. Alice smiled, he smiled back, happy to see his mommy.

"Miss?" The nurse said softly again.

Alice reluctantly relinquished her hold on Charlie, allowing her to lift him from her arms and carry him out of the room. Only after the door closed and they were out of ear shot that Alice truly let go.

Her tears fell fast and strong as she clutched at her pillow. The sobs racking her body and making her shake. She screamed, letting out all her anger, hurt, humiliation and sadness out into the pillow that muffled it. She tore at it, feeling the places where it was damp as her tears pooled there.

"Hatter… damn it... I love you" She sobbed. "But I don't know if you love me. I don't know if I want to love you anymore."