Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
WARNING: Not only is there slash, but there is also slashy sex. You have been warned!
"I… I don't really trust him either."
There was a silent pause where Sirius stared impassively into Remus' face and Remus stared back, quiet, until Sirius broke into a smile and pulled the tawny-haired man toward him in a tight embrace.
Remus uncertainly wrapped his arms around Sirius' neck and breathed steadily into his neck. He could feel his trust for Sirius grow, and his confidence in the thought that Sirius would betray him slip away from him slightly. But that consideration returned to his mind a moment later as Sirius let go of him.
Remus blinked away the tears threatening to spill in his eyes. He direly wanted to ask Sirius if he really loved him, what his intentions really were, and if he still cared that he was a werewolf.
"You okay, Remus?" Sirius asked concernedly, noticing Remus' far-off daze to the carpet.
"I – yes," he answered hastily, not wanting Sirius to worry, "I'm fine. I… I just… I was thinking about James."
Sirius furrowed his eyebrows. "What about him? Do you trust him or something?"
"No!" said Remus swiftly. "I was just thinking… if you trusted him, that's all."
"Of course I don't! He's a lying bastard that betrayed both of us!" Sirius extended an arm and wrapped it around Remus' waist. He kissed him softly on the temple. "I love you, Remus. If you don't feel good about returning back then we won't, all right?"
Remus nodded mutely. "Thank you." he murmured, and laid his head on Sirius' shoulder.
---
It was exactly two hours and forty-three minutes after the first Daily Prophet of the day was printed that James got an owl from the Minister. The owl, carrying an official looking letter, had a sharp beak that James was worried would peck him half to death, which it did, until James irritably told the owl that it was going to see the Minister. The letter contained scribbly black handwriting, reading a few simple words:
I am not amused by the Daily Prophet. See me immediately.
James swallowed audibly as he read the note. He contemplated going to see Lily, or even running off in fear. But instead, being the Gryffindor he was, he grabbed his wand headed with for the door with a set jaw.
---
Sirius head was laying softly on Remus' knees, his sleek black hair falling elegantly over Remus' trousers while the werewolf playing with the black locks idly.
"I've always wanted to ask you," Remus asked, shifting slightly on the couch, "what is it like at Hogwarts?"
Sirius smiled lazily, his voice languid. "It was great," he mumbled, "the first time I got there… my parents had told me to get myself into Slytherin and do whatever it takes… I didn't. I got howlers for months, but I didn't care anymore. Hogwarts had become like my home… every time I came back every September, the first day was always perfect. The food was like a never-ending Thanksgiving feast, and the ceiling in the Great Hall never ceased to amaze me…"
Remus frowned. Sirius noticed immediately and hastily tried to erase his words.
"Not that there weren't bad times! Filch, the caretaker would always loom in the hallways! He always caught James and I when we came back from quidditch practices – one time when it had been really rainy and the two of us were smearing mud all over the corridors, it took thirty-three dungbombs and seven crashed cabinets for Filch to leave us and go after Peeves."
Remus smiled faintly, brushing a strand of his tawny hair from his face. "Tell me about the good times," he said surely, "I don't want to hear about you and James getting detentions."
Sirius laughed. "That would be impossible, Remus. Detentions were two-thirds of our time there. We got detentions all the time! We were… official pranksters by the second month."
Remus chuckled, brushing his fingers lightly around Sirius' hairline.
"There was this one time…" Sirius said, still snickering, "when Snivellus had fallen for nose-biting teacups at lunch… it was still on his nose until Potions!"
Remus noticed that Sirius was no longer aware of his audience, and that the werewolf had no idea who Snivellus even was. He was too wrapped up in his story.
"James ended up getting the detention instead of me, but I still came along… that's what we did then!"
Remus nodded along dutifully, not bothering to stop Sirius.
"And James would always envy me for getting all of the girls – not that they meant anything to me," Sirius added hastily, giving Remus a short but still intense kiss. "James was after this Evans girl for all seven years… he never got her. I suspect he's still convinced that he's in love with her, but Evans is probably with another guy. I'm glad I settled down, at least."
Remus grinned at his words, dragging Sirius up by the collar and connecting their mouths firmly.
---
James rode up the lift to the Minister's office, everything but his nosehairs were sweating. Even his ankles were sweating.
He opened the door to his boss's headquarters cautiously, peering in first. The Minister was leaning back casually in his chair, fingering something unidentified to James.
James entered carefully, gulping.
"Good afternoon." He muttered.
The Minister smiled, his grin sugarcoated – too much sugar. "New wand," he hissed smoothly, flipping the item about in the air.
"I – uhm – see. It's nice." James murmured uncomfortably.
The Minister nodded. "Sit." He ordered, and James did so.
"Is… is this about the Daily Prophet?" James said uneasily, swallowing and staring fixedly at the Minister's comb-over of hair.
"Yes," the Minister said curtly; no beating around the bush, "tell me, Potter, that someone decided to polyjuice potion you and feigned the interview."
"I… no." James said, feeling bolder than he actually was.
"What did you just say?"
"I said no," James repeated. "I did do that interview."
The older man jerkily scooted his chair backwards, grabbing a copy of the newspaper from his table in the corner, eclipsed by the shadows of the curtain. He straightened it out aggravatingly, pursing his lips.
"So you don't deny saying 'I admit to being a xenophobe. I may be a slayer, but werewolves don't deserve to be killed. I would quit tomorrow if I didn't need the money. My boss is just as unfair to werewolves as I was. We should give a chance to everyone, troll or vampire.' Well? Did you?"
James swallowed. He didn't recall mentioning the Minister, but he had been babbling almost everything with the exception of his family medical history to that interviewer.
"I… I did. I-It's true."
The Minister gripped the paper tighter. "Then let me make this easy for you, Mr. Potter. No need to quit. You are fired." With that, the man tore the paper into eighths and sprinkled the pieces on his meticulously organized desk.
"Uh…" James began speechlessly, but found no thoughts in his mind or voice in his throat.
"Just remember, Potter! Just because you aren't a slayer doesn't mean other people still are! I'll never stop killing half-breeds! They're not humans, Potter, and when you learn that then you can crawl back to me." He sprayed James with spit as he roared at him furiously.
"Or maybe…" James started quietly, "or maybe it'll be the other way around."
He stood up, giving a small and curt nod to the Minister before he left the office feeling self-satisfaction more than the worry of that fact that he would no longer be getting a paycheck anymore.
---
Remus gave an edgy glance to Sirius as he made his bed with deft fingers, smoothing out the wrinkles while not taking his eyes off of Sirius.
It had been a week now since they had arrived at the hotel, and Remus was getting less and less convinced that Sirius had a plan for the two of them. He admired the decision Sirius had started out to make; simply leaving home to avoid the Ministry and James, but now what would they do? Remus wanted to know what would happen next, because it wouldn't take long for Sirius to run out of money. It was making him terribly uneasy, but he certainly wasn't going to admit that to the other man.
He would simply ask him hesitantly. Very hesitantly.
"So what are we going to do now?"
"What are you talking about, Remus?" Sirius asked.
Remus hesitated. "We… we can't just stay in this hotel room forever. Where are we going after this? Where are we getting money?"
"I was thinking… we can… well, I do have a plan." Sirius said, ruffling his hair uncomfortably.
"Yes?" Remus pressed persistently.
"Fine! I don't have a plan, all right? I have no fucking idea what we're going to do." Sirius punched the bed sheets, his expression livid. "I-I'm sorry, Remus."
Remus watched Sirius with large eyes, brimming with tears that never fell. Instead he walked forward and wrapped his arms securely around Sirius' shoulders, and immediately felt the other man return the hug. His arms automatically wound their way around Remus' waist, slipping his thumbs upwards so Remus' shirt rid up a bit. Softly, Sirius let his fingers caress the soft skin on his lower back, the rough texture of his scars unnoticed to Sirius.
"We… we will find a way." Remus reassured himself more than Sirius, mumbling into his shoulder.
Sirius wasn't paying much attention to his boyfriend's words; just the gentle murmur of his voice was enough to relax him. He brushed his cheek against Remus', licking at his earlobe before letting his lips trail slowly to the tawny-haired man's mouth. Remus emitted a whimper. Sirius smiled at the sound before he finally captured his lips and licked hungrily at the roof of Remus' mouth. They both moaned simultaneously before Sirius' hands sought out the first button on Remus' shirt and struggled to open it. They're tongues tangled together, rubbing against one another to create the best of friction that turned both men on incredibly.
"C'mere," Sirius growled, roughly pulling the werewolf closer to him. They tumbled over onto the bed, Remus landing on top. Remus smiled at the arrangement, greedily ripping the buttons off from Sirius' shirt, exposing his bare skin.
"Someone's hungry," Sirius said with a smile, biting at Remus' neck.
"I'm always hungry for you." Remus admitted, nipping harshly at the black-haired man's chest and earning a moan from him. "I love it when I'm the one to make you moan."
Sirius jerked Remus upwards, pressing their mouths together fervently. "I want you." he murmured against the werewolf's lips with heated breath.
Remus complied and urgently bucked his hips, hurrying to unbutton his own trousers. Sirius swatted his hand way, replacing his own fingers were Remus' just were.
"Let me – please." Sirius panted breathlessly, removing Remus' trousers as he felt Remus do the same for him. However, the tawny-haired man was faster and was already pulling down Sirius' boxers and thrusting his hips on top of Sirius' without any delay. They both moaned softly, gripping each other's waist and shifting to allow themselves more pleasure.
Sirius hurried up their rocking with need, becoming fiercer and brutal. Remus didn't mind; he groaned along with his boyfriend and attached their lips together desperately before Sirius pulled back to warn Remus.
"Remus – I c-can't – I'm g-going–"
Sirius yelled out as he finished, Remus not far behind. He bucked his hips a few more times before he collapsed on top of Sirius, panting onto his chest.
"I… I love you, Remus." Sirius said, giving him a sticky and sweaty kiss on the lips that Remus tiredly returned.
"I… need a shower." Remus slurred exhaustingly. "Take one with me?" he pleaded.
"Of course."
---
James knocked furiously on Lily's door, not stopping the rapping of his knuckles until they were bruising. Lily, looking windswept, finally bursting open the door.
"Whatis it, James?" She asked, her eyes wide.
"Tell me you have a job!" he pleaded, grasping onto her shoulder.
Lily shook his hand off. "Of course I have a job!" she said indignantly.
"Tell me I can live with you!" James begged.
Lily put her hands on her hips scoffingly. "You've been practically doing that for the last week, James."
"So… is that a yes?"
"That's a get a bloody job," said Lily crossly. "While you live here."
"Yay!" James hugged her ecstatically. "We're gonna be roomies!"
"Please don't," Lily wrinkled up her nose. "I'm regretting my decision already."
"I'll find another job, I will–"
"I – what happened at the Ministry?" Lily asked interestedly.
James stepped inside, ruffling up his hair and furrowing his eyebrows. "Either he fired me and I quit or I quit and he fired me. I don't remember what happened first."
"I suppose he was not impressed by the article in the Daily Prophet?" Lily said doubtfully.
"No, no… but I'm glad I moved on from that. I really am. And maybe – really truly maybe – one day I'll be able to prove the Minister wrong myself."
Lily was silent for a moment.
"Lily…?"
"Weshould," said Lily confidently. "We should prove the Minister wrong!"
"Lily, that'll never be possible–"
"You got me, didn't you?" the red-haired woman said determinedly, standing up firmly. "And I never thought that that would be possible! We should take down the slaying business!" Briskly, she brushed her crimson curls from her shoulder.
"Oh lord."
---
Remus rubbed the towel at his head, messing up his mop of wet hair and sending a flash of a smile to Sirius. Sirius kissed him affectionally on the cheek.
"That was fun." He commented with a grin.
"What part? The shower part or the bed part?"
Sirius put his hands loosely on Remus' hips. "Both," he said. "I love you."
Remus put his forehead on Sirius' chest, gazing at the thin sheen of shower steam on his skin. If only he knew if Sirius really did love him…
"Can – can you prove it?" he muttered boldly, still not meeting his gaze with Sirius' eyes. However, Sirius had something different in mind, putting his thumb and forefinger on Remus' jaw and pressing it upwards gingerly.
"Do – do you not believe that I love you?" Sirius asked tenderly. Remus looked up tentatively into Sirius' gray eyes, and did not see the confident, glowing sense of coolness mirroring through them. A look of sensitiveness and hopefulness was in them, and it was then that Remus realized that they were his eyes reflecting in Sirius', for they happened to be getting closer by each second.
"I… I…" Remus began desperately.
Sirius backed up, taking the other man's scarred hands in his.
"You can't trust me," he said, as though reading Remus' mind. Remus looked up fretfully, his eyes shining.
"I'm sorry," he said, wanting to look down but never being able to do so. "I'm sorry." He said again.
"It's… okay." Sirius told him softly. "I used to be a slayer. We're… we're supposed to be rivals. I just thought that… what we've been through – we'd trust each other."
Remus wiped a stray tear from his eye. "I wish I knew what's going to happen in the future," he said, "but I don't know. And I can't find out." He gripped Sirius' hand tightly. "You're all I have. I don't want to lose you. And if it all turns out to be – to be an act, then what the hell am I supposed to do? I don't think I could trust anyone anymore."
Remus felt his knees sink to the floor desperately. Sirius joined him on the floor automatically, kissing his neck softly.
"I love you," he said. "please believe me."
Remus sniffed, letting his knuckles graze underneath his eye to sweep away the stray tears.
"I… I think you should go back to James," he said, "without me."
Sirius put his hands on Remus' tear-streaked face gently. "Don't tell me to do that." He said quietly, tears threatening to fall from his own face.
Remus shook his head. "No, you should," he said. "The – the other day when you were t-talking about James and you at school – he's still your friend, Sirius. You don't want to lose h-him."
Sirius closed his eyes. "I don't want to lose you, Remus." He told him, but Remus had already shakily gotten up and wiped the tears from his face, despite the fact that they were still pouring down his cheeks.
"You were right all along, Sirius," he said, trembling, "werewolf and slayer would never work out."
Sirius shook his head firmly. "You don't want to go, Remus!" he persuaded him, but without avail.
"Go back to James. I know he'll take you back. Just – just forget I existed, all right? You won't regret it later on. I – I just don't want to stay here to find out if this really is a joke or not. I want to leave before – before my heart breaks, Sirius."
Sirius didn't get up as he watched Remus reach for the door and leave the room. It was like the end of ends had happened, like his chance for love had been over because even Remus didn't trust him, as he watched the werewolf reach for the knob in what seemed like painfully slow motion. As if his body was nailed to the floor, it was fruitless to try and stop him.
"Don't tell me what I just did." Sirius murmured to himself under his breath.
AN: Don't kill me. I realize that all of you want to run to my house with knives because I just screwed up the puppy love, but all of you knew it had to happen! Things will get better for Lily and James and they'll eventually get better for Remus and Sirius… but only if you want them too.
Here comes the big question I must ask, do you want there to be a happy ending?
Do you want Remus and Sirius to be together, or Lily and James to be together? Do you want both of them to be apart, or only one of them to be together? Tell me what you want to happen with this story, because everything is mapped out except the final outcome. It can go either way. I just want you to know, if you don't want Remus and Sirius to be together, Remus will probably end up not living… ooooh. Anyway, what you think counts:D