Hey guys! I feel bad that this came out way later than I intended…but I'm still on break from school so Hopefully I can get Denial's chapter out faster and write the next chapter for this one faster ^_^;;
Alrighty, so I hope this one comes out well ^_^ I really feel like there should be more I talk to you guys about…but I can't seem to think of anything… Although, I would like to give credit to Vague Gravitation for BETAing a few parts for me ^_^ She's so awesome…and she helped me with a few parts that I was stuck on! Give her the love everyone! SHE SO DESERVES IT!
Now instead of listening to my babbling, here's the part we all actually want to get to in the A/N~
MIRARIKO – Thank you! You really do like this Kuro?! THAT'S SO AWESOME! I get so anxious that I'm not doing him right really often…so it's really nice to get some reassurance! Thank you! Hope you like Kuro-chan in this chappie also xD
easha lilly – YAY! Yes…I do quite imagine Fai to have some masochism in him to some extend…but that's just me xD Yeah, I've looked around at some of those places when I was searching for another place to put my work on besides here, but all of it was so confusing and it didn't hold as much of a fan base v.v I've heard of Wattpad also. I looked into it because a friend told me to and had no idea what I was doing at all… I think I'll stick to here and just try hard not to get my stuff deleted ^_^;; Here's your next update!
xD She's gotta give you some sympathy for that! Alright then O.O I'd be a little afraid to have all my passwords cracked xD You wouldn't scare me away with that stuff at all! I don't get scared easily =3 (I probably do…v.v) You're welcome and here's your update!
Justchangedmypennamelol – WELCOME NEW READER! I WELCOME YOU WITH MY HIGHEST RESPECTS! Like your pen name by the way xD *Sniffles* Thank you so much! Oh, don't worry…despite all the sadness, angst, and horrible situations…there will be a happy ending! I can at least promise that! You just gotta get past all the stuff that makes you all wanna murder me first xD I'm glad it's the right amount…I'm an angst lover, but I try not to drown you all in it. I am! I will see this through to the end despite my long updates! *Huggles back*
Guest (Chapter Six) – I don't know why! xD I'm glad that you have found an addiction to it though! ^_^ It makes me feel better about it! I hope I can keep you here for it! Hope you enjoy the chapter!
Guest (Chapter Thirteen) – Here's your next chapter! Thank you! Awws! Thank you so much! I sure hope it's well written… *doesn't feel as confident with this chapter but I suppose we'll see* Thank you ^_^ Hope you enjoy this one~
Vague Gravitation – NUU! You can't die! xD I need you to complete your stories and talk to me! xD Hyuu indeed~ Thank you~ I believe it is drama and angst you see in the horizon =3 Thank yous~ You are as well! *Huggles back*
A3shFaerie – YESH! It does suck…it'll come eventually, that's why all this is adding up ^_^;; Wonder how it'll turn out though =3 I LOVE HER TOO! *Huggles Chinatsu* She was so fun to write! Like I said, I wanted her to be like Yuuko and a bit crazy~ I wish I could use her more in the story though…I'm not sure how I would do that though =/ Hope you enjoy this chapter ^_^
Jay – Thank you new reviewer! I'm glad it's cute, I really do! Hope you enjoy this one as well~
All the reviews! It's a lot more than I've gotten in a while~ -3- Thank you to all of you who reviewed! I luffles you all! I'd send you a virtual cake pop…but I ate them all v.v I'll send you all something soon though xD Review everyone else? It really makes me update as fast as I can…and it makes my day and actually makes me want to write! But if you don't…I still love ya anyway for reading ^_^
Italics means thoughts ; Bolded italics is the song lyrics ; T means scene change or time passing
FAI POV
Disclaimer: I do not own Tsubasa, the characters, or the story...this is just my own creative plot twist~
"Damn you just looked so sexy though!" I chime again, earning another near blush to highlight the raven's cheeks.
"How many times are you going to make more remarks like that?" He smirks down at me.
"As many times as I like~ I can't help it! I loved watching you run around today!"
"So any other day you don't give me a second glance?" he asks with a chuckle, smirk still never leaving.
"No! I watch you every time! It's just today they allowed you to play soccer with your shirt off…and your aggressive, focused face was just so captivating…and your body just…" I trail off, head dropping down so he doesn't catch the blush until I recover enough from it. Taking a quick inhale of air to reassure myself, I smile up at him, noticing a blush to his cheeks he's trying to fight off himself.
"I just couldn't keep myself focused…my mind wasn't in the game," I say lightly, giggling a bit at my failures earlier.
"Yeah, I could tell. That soccer ball hit you pretty hard in the face…"
"Yeah… It didn't hurt that bad. The only thing that was real bad was that I started bleeding when I was hit."
"I KNOW!" he yells, baring his teeth. I chuckle a bit remembering how he had literally stopped playing and ran over to me, freaking out and asking if I was okay more than I thought he was capable of. "I was about ready to go and pummel in that bastard's face that did that to you!"
"He didn't mean to, Kuro-chan! I just wasn't paying attention…" His grip on my hand tightens and I notice him grimace slightly. "Besides, I got to sit out and watch you run around the rest of the time~"
"Hnh…bet that was real fun," he says in a low, mocking voice then smirks down at me again.
"It was! You were very fun to watch~" I reply with a smirk of my own. His grows, an emotion growing in his eyes that I can't exactly read…
"So what was more interesting to watch? My upper half or my lower half?" My face feels like it's on fire in seconds and I snap my head away, baring my teeth and begging it to go away and spare me some of my mind that isn't flustered.
"Uh, I…I watched…uh…I liked…" He bellows out in laughter and moves his hand to wrap around my shoulder to pull me closer, planting a sweet kiss on my head then just holds me there, making me melt into every nook and cranny on him I possibly can.
How does he do this to me? I can't help but sigh elatedly. I admit it, I couldn't keep my eyes from wandering down a few times and catching a glimpse, but I swear it primarily stayed above waist-level! It wasn't that hard either…everything about him was captivating and still is, even his beautiful tan skin that helps to shape breathtaking curves being that are being hidden underneath his shirt in and almost cruel way. The way his body moves with each step so gracefully yet strong…the strong bone structure in his face…and his eyes, gods, his gorgeous eyes…those eyes that are so hard to pull your own away from. His eyes hold so many emotions that I've never seen before in all my years. They're always so hard, but that deep redness always holds me hostage within their depths. Everything about this raven is perfect…every single little thing…and that was only magnified while watching him running around today. It gave me a chance to truly admire my lover's outer appearance. Then there's his personality…
"Well, guess it's time I gotta go to my seat…talk to you after class," he sighs, leaning over and placing a quick kiss on my forehead, then starts to make his way for his seat with Ashura gazing harshly at him. I watch Ashura's eyes follow him, head never moving, then his eyes snap back over to me and meet my cold glare. I didn't even watch Kuro-min because I was so intent on watching his every move. He hasn't made any threats or attempts recently, but that doesn't stop me from watching him like a hawk.
I slowly traipse to my own seat, keeping my guard up on maximum until I turn to sit and face that demonic man. It's been a week since him and I talked and when Kuro-sama was nearly killed by that car the shadow demon was controlling. Of course ever since then I've tried to stay by Kuro-ryuu as much as I could…except for when he had to go home. I've deprived myself of sleep staying up all these nights worrying about him, but the constant presence (even if it's just a little) of his aura keeps me calm for the most part. So long as I can still sense him and see him I'll be alright…
The crinkling from a paper annoying being waved in my face snaps me out of my thoughts. I grab it from the guy next to me then stare down at it until Ashura's voice sounds, making my head pop back up.
"Finish that by the time class is over. You can talk amongst yourselves just stay on task," he says apathetically, turning his attention up toward the sound of a chair sliding a few rows behind me. "Talk amongst yourselves by the people next to you," he adds immediately, replying back to someone behind me with a hard stare. Kuro's low growl followed by the chair sounding again allows Ashura to turn again and bore unenthusiastically into the papers on his desk.
Kuro-chin's cute attempt brings a smile to my face. I read the first question and watch my pencil start to scribble across the page before losing myself in my thoughts again. He's so adorable! I wish I could sit by him…but I don't want Ashura eyeing us down the whole time. Besides, when I'm right next to him I'm not as on guard… At least just Knowing he's in the same room as me is enough to satisfy me and keep me aware…
I feel my face harden, hand slowing to a stop. They haven't been as active as I thought they would be… They haven't even made another attempt toward Kuro-pon. Well, he's had a few times where he was pushed off balance unexpectedly or hears weird sounds and voices while he's been around me, but the biggest threat that proposes is just a nuisance. Kuro-rinta's frustration is about the biggest danger there. I realize my hand at rest and quickly begin writing again, drowning out everyone's voices. However…that hasn't thwarted any of their attacks on the humans. They've been getting progressively worse, and these humans are beginning to lose their wills to live and fight…just how they've planned it…
"Another attack like that?! Those damn demons, I swear I hate every ounce of their existence." I freeze, eyes widening and blood going cold in an instant.
"I know, I hate them. I think some demon tried to mess with my family, and like hell I was gonna let that happen," the guy says vehemently. I start to shake a bit at the sudden awkward situation. Even though I really have no reason to be freaking out considering they have no idea that I'm among that hated race, well half of me. However, it is really uncomfortable sitting in front of two guys who hate demons and I have no idea in my right mind what they would do were they to learn that two demons are actually right beside them without their knowing…
"I wish they would just all go die like they were supposed to all those years ago. I hate how they just prance about like they own us." Just about to stand up to get myself away from them, an unexpected slam on the table behind that makes me jump instead and turn my head gradually toward the sound out of curiosity. Ashura smirks down at the two startled and confused guys and straightens himself back up to speak.
"Scared of demons are you? How come?" They instantly regain their postures, shifting into a position to defend themselves with anger clearly written all over their features.
"Hey, man, we're not scared of those monsters!"
"Yeah! They're the ones acting like cowards by not showing themselves when making such dirty attacks!" Ashura's leer augments and he bends down closer to him, that I-know-something-that-you-don't attitude dancing in his eyes.
"Oh no, it's not that they don't want you to see them, you just can't see them." Confusion and intrigue wash over them, waiting for Ashura to continue. "You see, if you're weaker than someone or something, you obviously fear them. The fact that you can't see the demons that have plagued your lives means you're not strong enough to see them. You'd be surprised with how many people can actually see them. There's not a lot, but they are humans that possess attributes no normal human could ever hope to achieve."
My grip tightens on the back of my chair and I hardly notice that I'm clenching my teeth together. What the hell does think he's doing?! Why is he giving such information out to humans so bluntly?! He's not even trying to cover it up at all in certain places! Is he trying to strike even more fear into them?! Well, whatever it is, it should stop before it reveals too much! I want to move and get him to quit talking, I really do, but the abrupt thought that Kuro-burro is in here stops me. Maybe that's a good thing though. After all, if I suddenly try and stop him, not only would that rise suspicion in why I stopped him, but it may bring questions as to how much I actually know myself. I know more than anyone that a certain perceptive ninja would very easily pick up on such a fine and insignificant detail as that…
"However, there are demons that even normal humans such as you can see, but you'll probably never know it." They gulp a bit, one opening his mouth to talk.
"W-what do you mean?" Ashura chuckles, lowering himself to eye level with the one that asked.
"What I mean is that they live among you. You never know when they're there unless you can sense the difference. Why can't you tell, however? Because they assume the form of humans. Being as strong as they are, they're presence is picked up visually by normal humans, but also possessing such power, they're able to shift into human forms to blend with the humans. You never know when one may actually be sitting right next to you," he punctuates his explanation with a disgusting toothy smile then stands up. I glance around the room to see a bunch of people actually begin to look around them, searching for any signs that stick out, but to no avail of course. My eyes are drawn back to Ashura when he turns to make his way back to his desk but halts when hearing the other guy speak up.
"Do you fear them, Ashura?" He asks hesitantly. Ashura pivots to face him with another smirk, an unnamed emotion spiraling around in his corrupt golden eyes.
"Maybe I do, or maybe I don't. Maybe I can see them, maybe I can't. You tell me." I growl to myself hearing his words cut through the icy and now untrusting atmosphere while watching him make his way back to his desk and settling down in his chair in, accomplished semblance encircling him.
Pursing my lips, I eventually turn to see Kuro-pii, only to feel myself stop dead in my tracks shocked at what I see. He sits there, frozen in place. He seems to be absently clenching his paper in his hand, crumpling it with the irate tension in his fist. However, it's his face that frightens me. His eyes are trapped in an enmity I've never seen before other than maybe one time. It isn't even the anger he gets toward me when I lie to him or when Ashura ticks off, it's much more intense, holding deeper emotions than that. What's even more disturbing is that he's glaring at nothing in particular. He just seems to be glaring into nothing…or maybe it's only something that he himself can see.
His hand suddenly flinches and begins tightening its grip on the paper and I see him begin to bare his teeth (maybe even growling if I can tell right), insanity seeming to quickly envelope the already present fury and spin together in a violent and deadly dance. And at this very moment, I'm beginning to wonder whether or not he's going to lose control of himself. Kuro…
The bell rings abruptly and his eyes instantly snap back to reality, mouth closing and relaxing. He blinks a few times then looks over at me apprehension immediately appearing on his face.
"Just turn in what you have done before you leave," Ashura tells everyone quickly, turning to the board to start writing things for the next class. I see Kuro-sama glimpse down at the paper underneath his hand, eyebrows narrowing in confusion but he stands up and follows after me to put our papers on the stack with the rest of the carelessly placed papers.
Ashura turns to see us and I barely catch Kuro-pin's smirk before he swiftly snatches my hand and intertwines his in mine and leads us out. I can't help but smile at his insistence of taunting Ashura. Frankly, it's even hilarious the extent he goes to and more so when I catch a glimpse of Ashura's reactions. Plus, I just love being so intimate with him, even though they're such small things. My smile falls somewhat though when thinking. Even though I thoroughly enjoy this affection, does he? Why is he so affectionate toward me…and in public at that. Does this actually bother him at all in any way?
"Ne, Kuro-sama…"
"Hm?"
"Why are you so quick to hold my hand or treat me so affectionately? Doesn't it bother you a bit to have everyone staring at you for it?" He scoffs, a prideful grin coming to his lips.
"Well, why wouldn't I?" he questions, almost sounding a bit surprised, like my question doesn't make sense to him at all.
"Because you don't seem like the touchy-feely type…and I'm sure you don't appreciate all these eyes on you…"
"Pfft! Like I care who looks at me and doesn't. Look, Fai, I'm happy that I'm with you. In fact, I'm even prideful in having you to myself. I want the whole world to know you're mine because, well, I want them all to know how much I like you I suppose." He tightens his hold, my grip tightening as well in reply. Wow…just, wow…how do you manage to sweep me off my feet the way you do, Kuro-sama?
T
"You're just too sweet, Kuro-ryuu~"
"Eh?! What do you mean by that?" I grin at him gently.
"I just can't get over how sweet you are toward me."
"Hm, you really think so, huh?" he asks with a bit of a smirk, resting against his hand while we wait for traffic to make a move on.
"Yes~ You're just so good to me, Kurogane," I say softly, gazing at him in such loving awe. No one has ever been so good to me, except my brother, but even that wasn't as strong as this since we were always on murder missions. We didn't have the time nor the mood to be good to each other…
"Woah, Kurogane? Why using my full name? It's so unlike you…" he says, getting quieter the more he spoke, a small bit of disappointment seeming to ring in his voice.
"I was just trying to tell you in all seriousness. I figured you'd much rather me say your name in more serious situations…" I tell him, tilting my head slightly.
"Meh, just refer to me as you usually do. That way I know it's really you speaking," he tells me with a smirk and wink, making me flush a tad. I look away, that small grin never wishing to leave my lips.
We finally begin to move again, much to Kuro's excitement but then have to slow to a stop and wait again. "Oh c'mon!" he erupts, slamming his hand down on the side of the window sill. "What the hell is up with all this damn traffic?! It's never been this bad!" I sit there silently before remembering the news these last few days.
"Maybe it's because of all the people quitting…" I say half to myself, half to him.
"What do you mean?" he questions, focus shifting over at me.
"Haven't you been watching the news lately?"
"Pfft, no. I don't care about that stuff. Whatever is happening to me or the people I care about is all I need to know."
"Well, a lot of people have been quitting their jobs recently because of this whole demon ordeal. People are worried about their families alone at home, the possibilities that could happen at work, or even just being out on the road more often when these demons can attack at any time. People have been quitting at an alarming rate, so this traffic could be a mix of all the people quitting and people like us who have somewhere we're trying to get to."
"I see…fucking cowards. What do they plan on doing now? What are they gonna do if this is somehow resolved and they have no job to return to? How are they gonna pay for anything or even get food? How are they going to ever do that now? If you ask me, sounds like they're going to have to resort to stealing or something…I swear, people really need to start thinking before they pull stuff like this…" he finishes, grip tightening on the steering wheel with an annoyed face staring out at the unmoving traffic.
"You know…I would've never thought about that…I'm impressed Kuro-rin."
"It's just common sense. Sure I'd be worried about my family also, but I wouldn't be stupid and quit the only source of income. How would I support the family I'm trying to protect then?"
"That does make a lot of sense…" I reply, trailing off into thoughts. Kuronta surely is smart…more smart than most demons I know as well. I guess it's just human nature to act upon their first thought and not consider the consequences later... If that's the way humans are the maybe they really are all doom-
I gasp when I espy the hazy form start laughing in front of us. Kuro begins to move the truck forward, making my heart jump.
"STOP!" I yell abruptly, jolting forward a bit when he stomps down on the brakes, a few honks from behind blaring at us. Thank goodness for seat belts… He snaps his attention over at me with panicked eyes, but I disconnect from them to look out the window, watching as the shadow demon laughed that high-pitched guffaw, sounding more like a screech than anything. I notice Kuro-tan snap his head in the direction, narrow his eyebrows, then look back over at me, slowly starting up the truck's momentum again.
"What the hell?! Why'd you scream for me to stop?! Is something wrong?!" he yells over at me, trying to pay attention to the road at the same time.
"N-no…it's nothing… I thought I saw something…" I detach myself from his focus quickly, hoping for a subject change but knowing I won't get one.
"What do you mean you thought you saw something…?"
"I thought I saw something in front of us…it was nothing…" I say, trying to make my voice pleading so he gets the message.
"…In front of us…? You mean…did you see something that was kind of hazy and grey?" he asks with slight hesitance.
"What?" I turn my head to him instantly.
"Nothing, never mind." He drops it just like that, not wanting to pick it back up. Of course he drops in now instead of when I wanted him to. Sighing, I turn to face the window.
Someone drives by throwing some dirty looks at us and I hear Kuro-pin growl from beside me. I didn't mean to make them mad or put Kuro-myuu in a bad position… I just know what that shadow demon was capable of. It could've caused a huge wreck…and since it was right in front of me…I know who would've been the prime target…
We remain in silence for the rest of the time, both probably sorting through the questions in our mind, trying to find some answers to our confusion. Hazy…grey…thing in front of us… Did he really see that shadow demon? Then does that mean that he saw the demon that tried to kill him a week ago? The traffic eventually begins to break up and we finally start moving again. So does that mean…that Kuro-chan is one of those humans with special attributes that Ashura was talking about…? The truck pulls into the driveway and gradually rumbles lower until it calms into a hiss. Is Ashura aware that he might be…?
"Whatcha thinking about, Blondie?" Kuro asks, smirking down at me through the passenger window. I gasp, jumping back and falling into the driver's seat. He erupts into laughter, making me glare at him in embarrassment and I scoot over, thrusting the door open into him.
"Gah! Nn, got me in the side," he grunts through clenched teeth, trying to keep his smirk on while clutching his side.
"You deserved it, Kuro-meanie! Making fun of me…" I say, trying to conceal my pleasure at the small victory I just achieved while sliding out of my seat. He coughs, attempt at holding them back apparent.
"You were just kinda cute when you flipped, I couldn't help but laugh!" he tells me wincing when he began laughing again. I didn't mean to hurt him that bad! I watch him with concern as he stands up, takes a deep breath, then looks back down at me.
"It's your house Kuro-dear, you lead the way~" He nods and spins around to lead the way, me trailing hastily behind. He jabs the key into the keyhole by the time I'm arriving at his side and he unlocks the door, pushing it open to allow us to enter into his inviting house. I nearly skip in and take a deep breath, stretching with a grin. It just feels so nice being in his house compared to my small apartment where the walls are all white and there's just a sense of coolness and loneliness there. Don't get me wrong, I'm quite happy in the little unit I've been living in for all these years, but his house just has something that it doesn't. Even though he lives alone (I've recently confirmed that when I accidentally fell asleep at his house the other night and no one was ever there besides us), there just seems to be a much more full air here…like he really isn't alone. Perhaps it's just the human love for things unlike demons that hate and shun life and have to make everything so negative…
"I'll be right back, gonna go change clothes," Kuro states from behind, passing by me and heading up the stairs. I watch him until I see he's made it up to the top then make a beeline for the TV, flipping it on immediately to the news. I guess it's just become a habit by now. I want to know where the demons are in their plans and if any of that poses a threat to Kuro-puu and I. However, I've been more wary of watching while Kuro is arou-
"You're obsessed with all this demon shit aren't you?" he asks, steeping onto the floor from his last step now in deep green sweat pants and the same loose black T-shirt from earlier, eyeing me intently. I tense up watching him not being able to move my limbs no matter how much I try or want to. Him taking a few more steps toward me is what breaks me out of my frozen spell and I promptly tear my attention away from him, scoffing and forcing an expression to appear as though it doesn't concern me in the least.
"No, I'm not. I'm thirsty. Got any water?"
"Yeah, it's in the fridge," I feel his eyes glued to me while I stand up and head to his kitchen. "It's just…I'm curious. I can't leave you along for five minutes before you've turned on the news and start watching all this crap about those demons." I ignore him and keep my pace over to his fridge, cursing myself mentally that it's a dead end and I've put myself in such a situation. Noticing his head pop around the corner from around the corner out of my peripheral vision, I keep playing it off as though I haven't heard him and continue my task of getting the water I so "desperately" needed.
"Fai, answer me. Why are you so interested in them?"
"I'm not, I don't care anything about them…" I try to convince. Upon turning to face him, I see that his face has hardened, clearly not convinced by my claims. Mm…why can't you just let me slide on this one Kuro-rin…?
"I don't believe that. If you're not interested then why are you so knowledgeable about them, you said you used to study them, and you're always so intent on watching the news and seeing what they've done?" he inquires, crossing his arms and vision fixed on me hard. I purse my lips mainly to myself but decide not to drop the gesture and walk toward him, attempting to push by him and back to the somewhat safety of his sofa.
I suddenly feel my wrist snatched and the next thing I feel is my body being pulled and slammed against his cold, stone wall. The sound of my water bottle crashing against his mahogany wood floor and bouncing a few times fills my ears as the raven's garnet eyes come closer to my own sapphire ones.
To tell you the truth, I've gotten quite used to this by now. There's been moments like this throughout this week when he locks me in his hold and holds me down somehow, aspiring to put me in a position where I can't escape from his questions. It did frighten me the first few times, but now all I really have to do is just look up into his eyes and feign a smile. Even though he puts up this front that he'll attack me if I don't give him an answer he finds suitable, I can see he has no such intent in his eyes. I guess he thinks that by intimidating me I'm going to speak.
"What is it about them that's caught your interest so strongly? Did some event lead to it?" he tries once again, leaning in closer to me, softening his expression to go with a more gentle approach I'm guessing. Event…there are so many events that have led to my lying nature…so much has led to why I can't talk to you truthfully or sincerely protect you…and then there's Ashura's constant reminders that I'm failing in keeping you safe…that you can never really trust me completely and will never trust me when you know the real me…and that's only more of the reason why I can't even trust myself anymore with anything…Dammit…why am I feeling so broken…? How do you do this to me…?
"K-Kuro-sama…" I raise my free hand up to caress the side of his face, fighting back the tears that persistently want to well up. "If you really must know…I feel I must…I just…want to protect you…I'm worried for your safety… I-I," I sniff, cursing myself for not being able to hold back the tears any longer. I see his eyes widen slightly through my blurred vision caused thanks to my lovely emotions. "They scare me… I don't want…t-to l-lose you…" I finally manage to choke out before the tears begin pouring over. A few sniffs and swallowed sobs fill the room around us.
"Fai…I…" he says, immediately cutting himself off by pulling me into a tight embrace. He doesn't have to finish his sentence… I can tell everything he wanted to say in this sincere hug. So I didn't tell him the whole truth, but I did give him a big majority of it, and I know that that is more than a big enough step to him. It was hard to tell him the truth…but now… I sniff again, struggling to rub away the tears that keep sliding down without my permission.
He pulls back, gazing down at me with such an uncommon gentleness in his eyes. Anther tear threatens to fall but is halted when he gently runs his thumb across my tender, pale skin under my eye.
"I'm sorry…" I mumble. "I just…I didn't mean to break down and c-cry in front of you…"
"Don't be, Fai. I'd rather- no, actually I want you to cry and come to me when you're upset. I feel so much better when you come to me instead of keeping it all in and getting hurt later," he tells me, brushing a few strands of hair out of my face. I smile up at him softly, nodding small but surely. We keep that strong hold on our eyes for a few more seconds before his expression begins to shift into a smirk. What is he thinking-
"So, you thought I looked pretty damn sexy earlier?" he asks, earning an instant blush from me. I nod slowly, trying in every way to hide my face from him. He chuckles above me, hand moving down to my chin and gripping it to force me to look at him. "Well, you're pretty damn sexy yourself." I feel my face light up in surprise before it's pulled to meet him halfway for a kiss.
I know that this was supposed to only be a sweet, gentle kiss…nothing more than a simple intimate gesture for both of us to just simply enjoy…however, it turns into an immediate desperation to do whatever it takes just to feel and taste each other. It's as though we haven't kissed for a month or something. Well, I think that my reasoning is linked to this heavy burden being lifted off my chest and this sudden comfort I gained with him moments ago…but with him, I'm not too sure. Although, right now, that's not a matter that concerns me. All I'm focusing on is this feeling I get with my lover…a feeling I couldn't possibly get anywhere else.
Each kiss came fast, getting deeper with each one. Soon the whole room around us begins to fade away, leaving us in our own heated and fuzzy world…nothing but each other existing in such a loving and slowly increasing lusty atmosphere. I barely catch his low moan before he pushes me up against the wall even more, leaning into me and pressing his own body against mine to where every part of our front sides are meshed together. A moan escapes from the sudden action but you won't hear me complaining in any way! Gods, I'm just savoring in this! My fingers snake up and tangle themselves in his ebony locks, gripping and tugging at his short, soft spikes every time his tongue grazes past mine in those spots that just drive me over the edge and heats up every action. He groans, then abscinds us, drawing a whimper from me at the unforeseen separation and only to be shut up again when he hastily relocates us to the sofa.
I land on my back in seconds and look up to see him tower over me, that expression of lust still foreign to me written all over his face. I want him! We don't waste time in getting back to kissing, exploring each other's' mouths and doing everything we can to learn every new part of each other that has yet to be discovered. Our minds, well, at least my mind severs from common sense and chases after these desires to feel him…to have him in every way possible…for him to touch me every inch of my body.
His warm hand comes into contact with the cold skin at my side; electricity shooting throughout my whole body and making it tingle. His fingers leisurely slide up under my shirt along the side of ribs, fingers dipping lightly between each break in them and I have to force myself not to shudder while my concentration keeps breaking bit by bit by each of our kisses.
His fingers brushes over my chest, making me gasp and dig my nails into his back by accident. He groans and for a moment I think I've hurt him or made him mad at me…quite the contrary. He does break the kiss but instead tugs my shirt up and off (with the little help I can give him) and throws it away where it can't get in the way of us any longer to be instantly forgotten.
Both of his hands rests on my sides then begin gliding up to my torso, sending licks of heat throughout my body. It's inevitable not to squirm slightly when his hands repeatedly brush over my chest randomly while he plants hungry kisses down my jaw then down my neck. The kisses come slower the closer he gets to my collarbone, tongue starting to take control and dance over my exposed, sensitive skin. His teeth whisk over it before biting down gently and sucking, marking me as his territory. I have to bite down on my bottom lip to keep from moaning even louder than I already have.
He releases my skin and peers down at it, smirking slightly at the fresh love bite then goes back to making his way down to my torso. His lips remain within mere centimeters from my skin, brushing lightly over it every now and then. With his hands still running all over my upper body and his making such minute yet overwhelming touches and gestures, it's even becoming too much for me to take. My breathing has far escaped from my conscience control and I feel his hands rise and fall with each of my pants when he runs over my rib cage. The heat emanating off his hand is only magnified from the contrast of my skin's always cold temperature and there seems to be a new heated feeling beginning to swirl in my lower abdominals.
I feel his fingers rub over my chest then it's momentarily impeded before trying to move on but not without a sudden pinching at my neck that knocks me out of my hazy state.
"Ow!" I yelp, wincing then blinking down at where the source of pain came from.
"What?!" he questions instantly, slight worry on his face that he's the one that hurt me. We both look down, vision met by my necklace that so inconveniently had to be there.
"I think the chain from my necklace just pinched my neck is all," I tell him calmly, eyes widening when my stupidity finally allows common sense back to its rightful place. I glance around him to catch sight of my shirt carelessly lying on the ground in a light blue clump. "Uhh…how'd my shirt end up on the floor?" He turns to glance at it before returning his blushed gaze. There's a mild discomfort pressing against my jeans and upon looking down at it, I catch the small bulge in his own sweatpants which ignites a fire in my face. Oh gods…we were just about to do that weren't we…? I feel my cheeks start burning all the more and snap my face to the side so he can't see the red vibrancy. We don't make any sound or comment to each other while I will and plead with it to go down. We just share an awkward silence, waiting for the other to speak up. What's worse is that neither one of us has moved so he still towers over me, only adding to my flustered thoughts that keep bouncing all over the place. Maybe it was a good thing we were stopped. I mean, don't get me wrong I really want every single part of this raven to be mine, but that's only mentally…I think… I don't know if I'm ready to make an emotional attachment like that…it'll only make it harder to keep my darker knowledge and past away from him… No…I can't be ready if I'm still worrying about something like that. However, him on the other hand, I have no idea how he feels of it…
I feel the couch begin shifting below me and I look up to see him straighten and scratch the back of his head, a bit of an awkward expression plastered on his face. "Um…well…I uh…" I smile up at him, finding his own flustered state quite adorable. No point in allowing this whole atmosphere go to waste~
I lean toward him and snake my arms up around his neck, gently pulling him down for a sweet, soft kiss like we originally intended. This is truly amazing…it's just enough to ignite our fiery passions all over again yet not enough to draw us into that next level like before. This gives me a chance to actually taste him and savor his plush lips…savor that one sweetness that can't exist anywhere but from him. I even begin to wish that he'd just keep holding me like this and never let me go. But he doesn't so I finally pull away, feeling that momentary resistance in his lips (which I love) although it's for the best before our little problems down there can grow even more.
"I'm still thirsty and I need my shirt back so I'm gonna go get that water bottle you so harshly knocked out of my hands and my shirt that you threw away~" I tell him with a small smirk (that I just can't get to be serious) and a tap on his nose, earning a roll of the eyes from him as I get up. I'm glad that I screwed on the top before he did that or else it'd be leaking all over the floor.
"Okay, that's enough of this depressing shit," I hear him say aloud to himself from behind me while I pick up my water, then turn to see the TV's light flash and die down to black while I return and pick up my shirt along the way.
"Told you it was bad," I tell him, plopping down beside him and taking a quick gulp of my water after slipping on my shirt.
"Hmpf!" He crosses his arms and sinks back into the couch. "Still don't wanna hear about it." He pushes himself forward and grabs the stereo remote, music filling the empty space the TV's sounds were once occupying within seconds. Nodding once in approval, he leans back into his previous position and eventually relaxes as though nothing happened. However, I can't get myself to relax when my mind is suddenly flooded and plagued with questions from earlier. I wonder why he is so distasteful toward anything that has something to do with demons? Is it because he can see them and that bothers him? Can he actually see them? He looks over at me, those enticing eyes peering into mine with a small bit of concern for some reason. What's going through your mind?
"Um...about earlier..." I start slowly, head falling a bit. I notice his cheeks mildly color a light pink before I open my mouth to speak again. "When I told you to stop suddenly..." His cheeks fade back to their normal pigment and his expression grows serious.
"Yeah, what about it?" he asks, eyes narrowing.
"You said you saw something...what did you see...?" He stares at me unmoving, eyes piercing into mine making me squirm from the discomfort (even though it should be reversed and him being more uncomfortable in this situation...). He finally sighs and looks away to glare at the ground, something I don't fail to notice.
"I said that it was grey and hazy..." his eyes narrow even more as I see him fall deeper into thought. "And it had glowing red eyes...and there was a really high-pitched laugh coming from it..." It takes me a few seconds before I notice how wide my eyes became while listening to him. "Why do you ask?" his voice sounds, snapping me from my world of shocking realization. I blink a few times to allow my vision to reform the raven's curious gaze at me and the words spill out of my mouth without warning...and I will probably regret it later...
"You can see them." It was meant to be a question but it came out as a blunt statement. I suppose that's because I don't need him to answer when he already has. Despite the fact I've already made the connections in my head, his face still twists into confusion.
"Say what?"
"You can see them...the demons..."
"Yeah, what about it?" he questions, cocking and eyebrow.
"Didn't you hear Ashura earlier? You may be a human with those special attributes!" It's not that I'm extremely excited over the fact he can see them...well, us...but it does make me feel a little better that he can see what I see when I freak about shadow demons. That also means that he can dodge their attacks when he sees them instead of me feeling I need to keep constant watch over him. Plus, it's just sorta nice to have a boyfriend that's been given more of a reason to be more than extraordinary His eyes narrowing at me makes my enthusiasm plunge.
"What's the big deal in that? Doesn't that mean that you just have the same special abilities?" I swallow, a burning lump reappearing after such a long time refusing to go down. Come on, don't break under the pressure! Is this how he feels every time he tries to get answers from me?!
"I don't know, maybe. How long have you been seeing them?"
"Since the time I first discovered their existence. And you?" First discovered their existence...? What have they done to him?!
"When was that?! How?!" I cry out at him.
"When I was a kid and they decided to step in and change my fucking life forever!" he yells at me, starling me somewhat. I sink back into my shoulders, leaning back away from him to give him the space he needs. His gritted jaw releases and all the anger and that small, yet still frightening insanity retreat when chased off by his concern.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell or direct it at you..." I shake my head, leaning back toward him again and resting my head on his chest, his heartbeat pounding a melodious tune in my ear.
"No, I'm sorry... I shouldn't have tried to pry..." I tell him gently, eyes closing to concentrate on every heart beat so I don't miss a single one. His hand gently comes in contact with my hair, beginning to run his hand over it and petting it in such a calming way I feel I could easily fall asleep in his arms right now.
"-Next is one of our most popular songs at the time: Your Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus!" the radio host's voice suddenly sounds when breaking through our peaceful atmosphere and I allow my vision to see through my half-lidded eyes. The music begins to thump and mix with his heart's rhythm in a delightful harmony.
When I see your smile,
Tears roll down my face.
I can't replace.
I perk up a bit more when hearing the second sentence, realizing that I can relate immediately to the words. I can't replace? My heart sinks. That's right... I'm a demon after all... I can't replace any of that and receive his feelings truthfully. I'm the whole reason he's in so much danger...
And now that I'm stronger I have figured out
How this world turns cold
And breaks through my soul
And I know, I'll find deep inside me
I can be the one.
What the hell am I thinking? This is the happiest thing that's happened to me! Over time, my resolution to protect Kuro-wan is what's keeping us alive...even as this world is starting to fall victim to war. I'm becoming stronger everyday after all, right? I know I'll be able to tell him the truth and only then can I truly prove my loyalty and desire to be with him. However, that time still hasn't become clear throughout all of this...so will it ever?
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven.
No matter what happens, I'll always stand up for him. Even when I'm beat down to the ground and can't stand back up, I know I'll still do everything I can...even if death is the only outcome.
It's okay, it's okay, it's okay...
Seasons are changing and waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you, I'll be the one.
I gaze up at him and see his own expression in some sort of peace... or bliss of some sort. The chorus begins to play again and I nearly mumble his name but decide against it. Is he thinking the same things as I am?
'Cause you're my, you're my, my
My true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away.
His eyes close, only adding to the angelic beauty that is him that causes my heart to skip a beat. He's...everything to me...he's the whole reason that I'm still alive right now! I would've ridden myself from this world had he not come and fueled my selfish desires...and if he were to just break that relationship off, I'd...I'd...
I don't even notice a tear has slid down my cheek until there's a sudden taste of liquid salt that seeped in through the corner of my lips. I sniff by accident and see his eyes open into slits, widening completely and followed by a gasp when he catches sight of me.
"Fai?!" he questions panicked, hands slapping on either side of my shoulders. Will my history and who I am really be too much for him? Will he look at me in disgust? Never want to see me again?! Oh, Kurogane...please prove to me that all of this hasn't been a waste...that I'm living for a reason... The words begin forming without thought. In fact, thought is where they should be but instead they have a life of their and take the form of my voice. Kurogane...
'Cause I'm here for you...
"Please don't walk away and... Please tell me you'll stay!" My voice sincs perfectly with the song's lyrics, as though I knew what was coming. I see his eyes widen even wider than I believe I've ever seen them.
Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know, I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning grey!
Just do whatever you want to me…amuse yourself any way you can…because, so long as you come back and save me from these emotions the demons have planted in my mind over the years...I'll eventually be okay again…even if it means saving you will end with me dying in your arms…just please be there… I throw my arms around him, latching as tightly as I possibly can without making him angry over the sudden act of affection. And to my surprise, he returns the embrace, holding me close to him.
"Fai…that song's lyrics mean something to you also?" I nod and I practically feel the smile spread across his lips. "Those lyrics, they just…hnh." He pulls away and moves me to where I'm gazing straight into his eyes, tears still begging to drip over my eyelid and follow the tear-stained tracks. "Fai, I'm not going to let you down…and I'm gonna always stay by your side through all this bullshit. And even if this war or whatever does come around, I'm still not gonna leave you for anything. I'm gonna protect you, even if it damn well means I'll die doing it. You mean too much for me, 'Candy ass'," he tells me in all sincerity with a smirk that's nothing but sweet as can be.
"Kuro…sama…" I slam our lips together, getting as much of this as I can before pulling away and smiling for real…a smile full of respect, gratitude, and utmost happiness. His eyes soften even more as his own grin shifts into one of the rarest expressions that could ever cross this raven's face. However, despite all the genuine contentment that overpowers his face, I don't miss that little glint of avidity.
"You know, Fai… I'm all for going further into that next stage. I'm more than willing to give myself to you~" he confesses to me gently with a bit of a smirk showing through his words, seriousness still being quite prominent though. I think I nearly fell off the sofa from the unexpected statement he so directly let me know. I don't even feel a buildup of heat in my face before it feels like it's on fire. My mind's racing, searching for some answer to give him –to give myself! Well, at least I got my answer from earlier as to how he feels about it! My eyes dart around everywhere, searching for anything to settle my attention on besides him, anything but him!
"I, uh…um…" I mumble, words stumbling over each other. I believe I even hear him chuckle at my inability to form a proper sentence. A gleam of light apprehends my crazed eyes, drawing to its source instantly. The sight of a beautifully crafted dragon hilt to a katana fills my vision, proudly displayed next to another blue tinted hilt that isn't as fancy as the other but still beautiful in every way.
"K-katanas?" I finally manage to stutter out. His face lights up at my question then turns to meet where my eyes were previously trained on.
His jaw tenses up and there seems to be some hesitance before he eventually speaks up. "Oh yeah, those are mine and my father's katanas. The dragon one is Ginryuu which was my dad's. He passed that down to me. Then the other one is Sohi which is mine." I nod, interest already piqued.
"So, do you and your father know kendo or any sword's arts?" I turn my attention over to him, who still has his eyes glued on them.
"Yeah, my dad and I used to train all the time. I learned everything I know from him…" His head slowly droops and his gaze becomes distant while it falls to the ground. I hope I didn't say anything that hurt him… It takes about a minute before he eventually looks over at me, the hesitance I didn't detect before in his eyes gradually dying away.
"The Kendo meetings are gonna start back up tomorrow and that's where I'm heading after my classes. You wanna come with me?" he asks me with a new version of trust glowing in his eyes, blending with the deep garnet to make a very favorable mixture.
Yay! Another chapter finally done! We're getting closer and closer to the end =3 Although, I suppose that isn't always a good thing… WHY DO MY CHAPTERS KEEP GETTING LONGER!? x.x Anyway, what y'all think of that saucy scene?! Too much? Too little? Way too sexy for your eyes?! Doubt it…since we're all in the mature rating for a reason…we've all seen worse right xD Let me know what you think? Please? xD
Well, hope to have the next chappie up soon, right after I'm done with chapitre two for Denial ^_^ Until the next one, R&R? TAKE CARE GUYS~