Chapter Thirteen

A moon had passed since the first gathering since leafbare. Silverswirl's belly was now swollen to twice its size and she was close to kitting. Lilystream had told her that she was going to have at least three or more kits. Although she was greatly excited for this she still could feel the nagging pain of losing Jacques. He would never get to see his children. He would never see them grow up to be great warriors and fighters.

After the catmint things had gotten better. It was easier to catch prey so they were all better fed. And Fernfeather had finally lost it. She would burst out screaming or just walk around talking to herself. Hawkstar made the choice to have her stay permanently in Lilystream's den. But it didn't make a difference to her; she barely knew where she was most of the time.

But other cats would and had become warriors. Since they had brought back the catmint all of the sick cats had gotten healthy. Because the warriors were healthy they could take on apprentices again. Brownkit, Oakkit, Leopardkit, Petalkit, Owlkit, Squirrelkit, Firekit and Badgerkit had all become apprentices.

Shortly after recovering from greencough Molepaw had had his final assessment. He became Molenose and was well on his way to become a fine warrior. Her other brother, Thrushpaw, had gone to a medicine cat meeting one night and had come back as Thrushtail. Lilystream had felt that because he had helped out so much during the epidemic he deserved his full medicine cat name.

The nursery was slightly less crowded with so many kits gone but it was still full. Rosebloom, Cinderfur, and she were expecting kits. Brindlenose and Deerswift were the only two with kits. Deerswift's kits, Ripplekit and Bluekit, were as sweet as could be. Yet, they really did know how to get under their skin. Ivykit was quiet and still small. She rarely spoke but when she did it was quite smart. What she lacked in size she made up in intelligence.

As the clans changed so did the landscape. Patchy spots of grass stuck up out of the muddy snow. Large drops of water dripped from the trees wherever she went. Even the prey was starting to come out. Although it wasn't always full there were more animals on the prey pile. She could always grab a mouse when she wanted one.

The only trouble Silverswirl had was Rosebloom. Rosebloom didn't approve of her or her kits because their father was Jacques. The calico queen refused to talk to her or even acknowledge her presence. Cinderfur and Brindlenose agreed that Rosebloom was being a mouse-brain but it didn't make a difference. Even Rosebloom's sister, Lilystream, had tried talking to her. Nobody could change her thoughts.

It was especially difficult considering it was Rosebloom who had raised her and her brothers after their mother had died. She had been Silverswirl's mother essentially.

Silverswirl had been thinking of all of these things as she sat alone in the nursery. Most of the queens and kits were out getting some rare sun. Silverswirl didn't feel like moving at all. Then she walked in. Rosebloom's belly wasn't nearly as large as Silverswirl's but it was enough to slow her usually quick gait.

Silverswirl heaved herself to her paws and cleared her throat. Rosebloom pretended not to notice. She rolled her eyes and began talking, "Rosebloom, you can't pretend forever. Please just let me say something to you." The calico queen stopped in her tracks and turned around.

"Fine. Make it quick though." She replied testily.

Silverswirl closed her eyes, remembering back to the kit stories she was told by the same queen standing before her. She remembered the one in particular she was thinking about. One she wasn't supposed to tell anymore.

"There once were three kits found by the SunClan border; a tom and two she-cats. Their scents were strange and foreign yet the warriors couldn't ignore the warrior code. They brought back the kits to the medicine cat, Rainfur. Unfortunately, one kit died; the tom. The other two, she-cats, lived. They claimed their names were Augmenté and De Lys." At this point Rosebloom's eyes had grown wide.

Silverswirl did not let this stop her and she continued, "The leader at the time, Berrystar, tried to find their mother but to no avail. Unwilling to turn them out she made them apprentices of SunClan. One of them became a great medicine cat. The other became a gentle queen and mate to the leader. You probably know them today as Lilystream and Rosebloom. So remember this: even the most insignificant loner can turn into the greatest cat in a clan. Never turn those out that can help you."

She finished her story staring straight into her eyes. Before she could say anything Silverswirl added, "Jacques may have been a kittypet, and these kits may be half of him, but that does not mean that they will serve their clan any less. Hawkstar fell in love with a loner. How is that any different from my situation?"

"I-I…I acted so…so juvenile. I'm so sorry Silverswirl!" Rosebloom managed to stutter out.

Silverswirl took a deep breath to calm her, "Thank you. I just want you to understand my situation."

"I had forgotten my humble roots. After so long in the clan those early memories have slowly faded. I…I had forgotten my brother…Roches…" Rosebloom's eyes were distant and vacant, remembering back to her early days in the clan.

Silverswirl decided that it was probably a good idea to leave her alone with her thoughts and left the nursery. As she stepped out into the fading sunlight she caught a few stares from her clanmates. No matter how much time passed she would always be considered as an outsider. Hawkstar may have made her mate an honorary clan member but it made no difference. She had fallen in love with a kittypet.

Molenose was sharing tongues with Thrushtail in a far corner of the clearing. They had given up a lot for supporting their sister in this entire deal. She knew that Molenose's friend, Gorsepelt, had all but forgotten him. She half walked, half waddled over to them and sat down with an emphasized sigh.

Instinctively Thrushtail got up and checked her belly, "It won't be too long now before they come." He announced.

Molenose rolled his eyes dramatically, "Yeah, we know, you've only said that every time you've seen her."

"I'm only doing my job mouse-brain!"

Silverswirl giggled quietly as she let the two bicker for a short time before stepping in, "Come on, and stop fighting you two!"

Thrushtail shot his brother one last look before returning to cleaning his paws.

"I-I talked to Rosebloom…about everything." She admitted.

Thrushtail looked to her with shock, "You mean she actually listened to you?! She wasn't even listening to Lilystream!"

"Yah, I know. I…well, I used the story on her…the one about their arrival at camp."

Thrushtail and Molenose were completely silent. Finally after several heartbeats Molenose spoke quietly, "Silverswirl, you know we were told never to repeat that story ever again. Hawkstar forbade it."

Frustrated she replied, "I realize that and it was a risk I had to take. I mean, what was I supposed to do, live in a den with an angry queen for six more moons?"

"She's right Molenose." Thrushtail admitted.

Molenose only sighed in compliance.

Thrushtail continued, "Silverswirl, I think you should go back to the nursery and get some rest."

"You tell me that every single day! I'm tired of rest; my paws are itching to do something. I need to move."

Her brother sighed, "After you have the kits you can go out into the forest, but for now, you have to stay here. You're too close to kitting."

"I could take a warrior with me, or you, or anyone for that matter." She protested.

Lilystream had apparently heard their conversation and padded over to the three siblings, "Thrushtail, she can go out into the forest just a little. You two go with her," she said, signaling to Thrushtail and Molenose, "And make sure that she doesn't go far." Silverswirl knew that the last comment was aimed at her. Everyone knew that she was always one to explore.

"Thank you Lilystream. Also, I've been meaning to ask you, are you feeling alright?" Silverswirl replied.

Lilystream looked shocked, "Uh, of course. Why would you ask?"

"You've just been slower lately, a little less jaunty."

Lilystream laughed, "It's just being cooped up in the medicine den non-stop. Not everyone is quite 100% yet."

"Oh, okay. Well then," she grunted as she rose to her paws, "We had better be heading out then. It's always good to have sunlight to stroll in." Before her brother could say anything more she was half-way out of the entrance. Her tail was just disappearing when Thrushtail and Molenose ran to join her.

Silverswirl already knew where she was going to go the moment the idea popped in her head. No matter what her brothers said she was going to go there. Though she was weighed down some by her belly it didn't stop her from sprinting through the muddy forest.

Snow was still falling every now and then but it was gradually thinning out as the moon progressed. Water and mud puddles dotted the paths that she was following and broken branches covered some. Here and there she would spot the occasional green plant sprouting out of the hard earth.

From behind her she heard the faint snapping of twigs and Molenose yelling at her to slow down. She was still one of the fastest in the clan. Soon the tall oak and pines gave way to thinner, wispy aspens and birches. The undergrowth became increasingly thick until it gave way to full blown prairie.

Silverswirl paused for a moment to remember back to that horrible day. Slowly she remembered which way they had come from and turned to the west slightly until she was facing the right way. Dense grasses rose up before her as she began her trek through the meadows.

She was alone out there in the open. Nothing was protecting her. Yet somehow, she felt safe. A glint of black up ahead confirmed her suspicions. The star-cat was watching her again. Silverswirl followed it into the tall grass. This didn't feel like the right way but she had faith in the mysterious cat's directions.

Then she came to it. It was a flattened area of grass, only the size of three or four warriors put together. The grass above her was bent over as if she were in a cave. Bits of fur and several tiny bones were all that was left in it. The air was filled with the scent of different animals; some prey and some predator.

But the one scent that stood out among them all was faint. It was barely there, as if hanging by a thin tendril. Only the fur and bones was a reminder of it. It was her one and only, her very world, her love, her Jacques.

Just then her brothers caught up with her. Their sides were heaving for air as they rested.

"Wha-What were you do-doing?!" Thrushtail angrily demanded.

"It's to-too dangerous out he-here." Molenose added.

Silverswirl simply rolled her eyes, "You know I can defend myself perfectly fine. I just needed to come out here." She took one last look at the remains of her love, "We can go back to camp now."

Thrushtail started to rant, "You could've been attacked by a fox or badger or fallen in a hole or tripped on something or-"he didn't get to finish as all three of them scented something different on the air.

It smelled like twoleg smoke and filth. It smelled like the rogue cats.

She let out a low hiss and tensed her muscles. Her brothers smelled it to and immediately surrounded her protectively.

The scent slowly withdrew from them as the rogues left the area. They were lucky, but they didn't want to take any chances. Quietly at first and then quickly they left the exposed meadow and returned to the cover of trees. Silverswirl didn't stop running until she was back in the camp.

Briefly she glimpsed Molenose slip into Hawkstar's den to report the incident. Thrushtail was heading towards the medicine den; probably to get some sort of herb for her. Silverswirl herself inconspicuously returned to the nursery. With all the running she was thoroughly tired out.

As she lay down she heard Hawkstar shout for a clan meeting. Whatever he had to say she would get from Feathertail tomorrow. For now, she needed sleep. Through the blur of her heavy eyelids she saw the outline of another cat in the den. A faint aura surrounded it as it walked up to her. Then, her world went black as she fell into a deep sleep.