Disclaimer: If you don't know what I'm gonna say here by now, you probably shouldn't be reading this story.

A/N: My life is pretty blah right now. So answering reviews has kind of been low on my priority list lately. (I apologize.) But reviews definitely make me want to write more and I appreciate that more than you may know.

So…. Read, enjoy, and review!!

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Seth felt so restless and weak walking back into his parents' home in Berkeley. He trudged through the foyer in his still damp clothing, smelling the coffee aroma and the sound of sizzling bacon coming from the kitchen. Originally, he was just planning on avoiding his parents, walking back up to his room to sleep more than he had the previous night, but he soon realized that his stomach apparently had different plans.

Seth tried to cover the gurgling of his stomach as he entered the kitchen. His hand was over his stomach and his eyes were squinting as if still adjusting to the sunlight.

"Seth!" Kirsten beamed at her son, enveloping him in a hug. "Where were you?"

"Newport," Seth answered casually as his stomach made another groan. "Think I could have some of that French toast and bacon?"

Kirsten nodded her head wordlessly, trying to figure out why Seth had been in Newport, when Sandy spoke the unanswered question.

"What were you doing in Newport, son?"

"Oh," Seth replied, sitting down at the kitchen table to eat, "Just hanging out."

"Hanging out? That's what you were doing in Newport?" Sandy probed further.

"Yeah, it was just something I needed to do."

Sandy didn't bother asking any more questions, getting the feeling from Seth that he did not want to answer any more, and the three of them sat silently down at the table to eat their breakfast.

The silence didn't last long, however, because Kaitlin soon bounded into the Cohen household, followed by an apprehensive Summer. Sandy, Kirsten, and Seth all looked up and each of their faces matched one another's when they saw Summer – surprise and anxiety rolled into one facial expression.

"Hey, Cohens," Kaitlin greeted. "Sorry I didn't stay here last night, I stayed with Summer at her hotel."

Summer smiled awkwardly, trying to avoid Seth's gaze she knew was on her.

"You weren't here last night?" Sandy questioned, almost rhetorically, and then turned to his wife, "I guess when you haven't been looking over your children for four years, you forget that it implies checking in bedrooms before you go to sleep."

"Sandy…" Kirsten scowled, getting up from the table. "Well, can I get either of you anything?" Kirsten asked Kaitlin and Summer.

"Nope, I'm good," Kaitlin replied. "I'm just gonna go wake my mother and make her feel guilty for not knowing I was here. I could have been kidnapped and been forced to watch 'Oprah' for hours on end. God, how awful would that be?" Kaitlin thought to herself for a moment before snapping out of her trance. "Yeah, well, bye!"

After Kaitlin motioned towards the stairwell, Summer stood uncomfortably at the kitchen's entrance.

"Do you want any breakfast, Summer?" Kirsten invited.

Summer crossed her arms over her chest as if trying to shield herself from something, as she shook her head. "No thanks, Kirsten. We ate some room service back at the hotel."

Kirsten was about to open her mouth when Summer began speaking again, this time directing her gaze at Seth, who had now gone back to focusing on his breakfast plate. "Seth?" Seth looked up at her with weary eyes. "Think we could go upstairs for a few minutes?"

"I haven't -" Seth tried to reply but Summer interrupted his approaching decline.

"Just for a few minutes. That's all I'm asking. Please."

Seth nodded his head slowly as he pushed his plate forward and stood up from his chair. Summer began making her way to the stairs as Seth followed, while Sandy and Kirsten looked on.

"Think that's gonna go well?" Sandy asked his wife.

"Depends upon how understanding our son actually is," Kirsten told Sandy, turning back to her food.

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"Hey, Cali-boy," Nick entered his apartment, seeing Seth sitting at the kitchen counter, "Get dressed."

"What? Why? It's a Sunday night. I have class at eight tomorrow morning."

"Doesn't matter. Get dressed."

"Okay…," Seth dragged out. "How about no?"

"Not an option," Nick threw his books down on the counter next to him. "Come on, we're gonna go out."

"I really don't want to," Seth pleaded.

"You need to. You're not gonna spend Valentine's Day wallowing and then suddenly decide you're gonna call up Summer and fall back into all of that. We just got her off your back, man," Nick slapped Seth's back. "She's finally done with all the calls, drop-ins, emails, letters – everything. You don't want to have to go through that all again once you realize tomorrow morning what mistake you made?"

Seth sighed and then after a beat, "How do you know it would be a mistake?"

"Because it's Summer. The same girl that killed your child."

"Well, maybe I can talk to her or something…"

"No! Seth!"

Just then, Seth's cell phone rang and vibrated across the kitchen counter as both Seth and Nick looked at it apprehensively. As Seth was beginning to grab for it, Nick's arm took it in a swift motion, glancing at the caller-id before rolling his eyes. Nick flipped the phone open, shouting into it.

"No! It's over!"

Nick shut it as Seth yelled at him, grabbing for it. "Hey! Don't yell at her!"

Nick looked at Seth with a raised eyebrow as he recognized what Seth had done. "Did you take one of her calls?"

"What?" Seth asked and then adding, not convincingly, "No…"

"Seth! What the fuck are you doing, man?"

Seth shrugged before replying, "I really miss her."

Nick sighed quietly, closing his eyes briefly, and then looked back at his heartbroken best friend. "This is why you're coming out with me tonight. You're not spending Valentine's Day here. Don't argue with me about this."

Seth took a deep breath. "I'm not arguing with you."

"Good. I'm leaving in twenty minutes. Get dressed because I'm not letting you go out in sweats."

Nick left the room, walking towards his bedroom as Seth trudged after him, into the bathroom to get ready.

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"Okay, so listen," Summer started as soon as Seth walked in the door. "I don't really know any other way to go about saying this so I'm just gonna come out and say it. I had a miscarriage, Seth, not an abortion."

Seth stood frozen for a moment, implying for Summer to continue on, helping to explain things further.

"I mean, I went to the abortion clinic but when I was sitting there I realized I didn't want to get rid of our baby at all. I guess I had just been so scared that everything was changing… I wanted something to control. But then I realized that the thing I was trying to control was the one thing I wanted all along. I wanted that baby with you, Seth. And when I cancelled my appointment and was leaving, this, like, young teenager I had been sitting next to shouted for me and told me I was bleeding… I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to. I… I wanted to have our baby. And I wanted to be married to you. I still want all of those things… Seth?"

Seth still stood shocked, finally shaking his head out of his running thoughts. "You miscarried?"

"Yes," Summer replied meekly.

"You're not lying to me, are you? Because that's a horrible fucking joke, Summer," Seth stared her down.

"Seth, I swear. Regardless of anything that has or hasn't happened between us in the past seven years, I would never lie about something like this to you," Summer spoke to Seth earnestly. "I swear my life on it."

"Then why for the past five months have I thought you had an abortion? Why didn't you tell me? And why are you just telling me now?" Seth asked, growing angrier with each word.

"I tried!" Summer pleaded. "But every time I did, Nick would hang up on me. And I sent lots of emails and letters – but you never replied to them."

Seth calmed down a bit, sitting down on his bed. "Nick deleted everything before we'd read or listened to any of them. It was the post-break up rule."

"Oh," Summer sighed, inching towards the bed. "Right."

"Does Ryan or Lana know?"

"No, I never told them. I felt so ashamed and scared. I thought you were ignoring me after I left all of those messages about what happened and I didn't want them to do the same thing to me. Even though I thought you'd tell Ryan yourself. And after a few months with Ryan and Lana still talking to me and them never mentioning it to me, I kind of figured you didn't want to tell them so I decided never to tell them either."

Seth took a few moments to process everything, nodding his head wordlessly, eventually coming to his own realization. "So. Wow. This is kind of big."

"Yeah…" Summer sighed, twiddling her thumbs, wondering exactly what Seth was thinking. Was he forgiving her? Could they go back to living their happy life together as they had six months ago? Would he now love her like he once had?

"What caused the miscarriage?" Seth broke the silence.

Summer shrugged her shoulders. "The doctor didn't say anything specific. She said it happens in one and eight pregnancies."

"It's that common?" Seth sounded stunned. Summer mutely nodded her head. Seth continued asking questions. "Does this mean you can't have any children?"

Summer's eyes lit up at Seth's question, feeling that maybe she was winning Seth over with her truthfulness. That maybe everything would be back to normal in Summer's life by the time she returned back to New York. "No, I can. The doctor said it wouldn't affect any future pregnancies I could have."

"Oh," Seth took it in, quickly adding, "Well, that's good. I mean… in case you ever want to have children when you find the right guy."

"Seth…"

"Listen," Seth turned, facing Summer, gathering her hands in his and keeping eye contact, "I'm sorry I didn't give you any chance to explain back when all of this first happened. I was just really angry and hurt. I'm still hurt I guess, but not about that. I just feel like I can't be a husband or a father to anyone -"

"Yes, you can," Summer interjected.

Seth shook his head, closing his eyes. "No, I can't. I know I can't. These past six months taught me that. And I also want to say that I'm sorry for saying those things to you yesterday. I didn't mean them. I just hated the way things had to turn out; I never hated you."

"How things had to turn out?" Summer prodded. "Things don't have to turn out any way if you don't want them to."

"Summer," Seth replied, staring intently into her eyes, "I heard everything you said to me yesterday. And I thought about it all last night. And even with today's new… information… I just think things have to be how they are."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I just want us to stay friends."

Summer pulled back, taking her hands out of his. "Stay friends? Seth, we haven't been friends for the past six months! We haven't even been talking! And as for before that, we haven't been just friends since we were seventeen! I don't even know how to be friends with you!"

"Well, I think that's what we need to be," Seth tried. "Too many things always come between us. Whether it's this or something else – something always breaks us apart. I mean, come on, Summer, look at us! I think we've spent more time broken up than we have spent together!"

"That's not true!" Summer yelled, jumping to her feet.

Seth followed her lead, jumping up and putting his hands on either one of Summer's arms to keep her concentration. "Summer, please listen to me. You're right – it's been hell without you in my life. I've hated it. But I just can't love you anymore. At least not in the way you want me to. And I don't think I want the same things as you in long run so it would just cause more problems than anything. So we should be friends. Great friends. I really feel like we could do that, don't you?"

Summer's tears poured down her cheeks as she hiccupped lightly. "But… but… I-I love you, Cohen. And-and… I do want the same things as you. I want whatever you want."

"Well, I want to be friends. Please be my friend, Summer. Please."

Summer stood still, watching Seth's eyes for a few moments, hoping he'd swiftly change his mind and say that he wanted to be with her. That he wanted nothing more than to stop her from crying and to comfort her until she fell asleep in his arms.

Summer missed those times with Seth. She missed them more than she had ever missed anything in her entire life. Her body physically hurt from the things Seth was asking of her and she couldn't do anything but simply nod in response, willing to comply with Seth's wishes. Summer just wanted to be close to Seth. And if this is as close as he would let her, then she'd take it.

"Yes?" Seth asked, smiling. "Good."

"Yeah…" Summer sighed. "Great."

Seth ignored her sardonic response, instead walking towards his suitcase. "Well, I'm actually heading back to Providence today – can't keep calling out to work – but how calling me next week? We can hang out or something."

"I live in New York now," Summer told him unemotionally.

"Oh, right…" Seth realized. "You took that job you wanted, didn't you?"

Summer nodded her head solemnly.

"Well, we'll talk on the phone at least. And hey, there's email. I want to stay in touch and keep up-to-date with your life from now on."

"Yeah…" Summer sighed again.

"Okay," Seth tried to nudge the awkwardness away. "So I've got to go. But I'll talk to you later. Bye, Summer," Seth waved.

"Bye," Summer attempted a wave back, watching Seth leave the bedroom.

In just two days, she had managed to have the guy she was in love with go from hating her guts, to telling him she had had a miscarriage, to deciding to become friends.

But everything she had done had not had the ending result she had been wishing for: Seth's lips upon hers, Seth's hands caressing her skin, Seth's voice telling her he loved her.

Summer fell back onto the bed, noticing the bareness of the bedroom that she had never noticed before. It seemed like everything had been ripped from the walls and torn off the furniture. The whole room felt so empty and desolate. So much like Summer.

And now? Now she had to pretend to want to know about Seth's life – what friends he was hanging out with, what bars he was partying at, who he was dating – knowing she would never be around to partake in these enjoyments with him because she had said she'd just be his friend. And because that was all that Seth had wanted. For them to be friends.

Summer felt completely broken and useless. Her life had peeked at twenty-one and fell quickly to its demise before she even had turned twenty-two.

She guessed it was just something she'd have to live with.

No matter what Summer could do or think of, her situation didn't seem fixable at all.

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Summer had been completely blissful when she had gotten out of her late afternoon shower to a missed call and voicemail from Seth. She had been trying with all her free time to get a hold of Seth in any way possible to explain things. For almost three weeks after the miscarriage she just wanted to tell Seth so he could come back to their apartment and comfort her. It wasn't until six days before she had given up; realizing Nick was doing everything in his power to keep Seth from returning to her. But when she saw that Seth had left her a message on her phone, she felt a renewness of hope. Maybe this was it. Maybe she and Seth could get back to how they were before everything had turned their worlds upside down.

And it didn't hurt that it was Valentine's Day – both an important day for couples and a significant and memorable date for Seth and Summer's relationship.

"Hey… umm… it's me. Yeah… I, well, I don't know why I'm calling, I guess… It's just… I miss you and, ah… Happy Valentine's Day. Umm… and I guess, I don't know… I just, fucking Christ, Summer, I miss you," it was at this point that Summer could hear Seth's voice begin to break, "And you know I love you… it's just… you fucking hurt me, Summer. And I can't just… you know, sit back and accept that. But I want you to know I love you… Remember that first Valentine's Day we had?" Seth had then laughed quietly into the phone. "It was awesome. I mean… I guess at the time it sucked but it really was awesome, wasn't it? I think about it a lot, you know… but, wow, I can't believe I called you. Actually, I'm glad I got your voicemail… No. I shouldn't have done this. Forget I called, please. Sorry. Bye, Summer."

Summer listened to his message seven times before she had enough courage to call Seth back, hoping he would answer.

When Nick answered, shouting into the phone, "No! It's over!" and hanging up, Summer stared at her phone in disbelief. Maybe she had just imagined Seth had left her a voicemail. Maybe it was all in her head and she was having a psychotic break. But then, after shaking herself out of her disbelief, she dialed her voicemail's number again, repeating the saved message from Seth three more times until she hung up.

Summer curled up on her couch later that night, holding a pillow to her chest, watching some stupid Valentine's Day movie with no-name actors and D-list actresses. She had a pint of Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough Ice Cream in front of her, still uneaten and melting with each passing second.

Even Ben & Jerry's couldn't fix this one.