Hugo was in a bad mood.

"This is bullshit," he groaned, snapping the textbook shut. "I know all this crap already. I don't need any more bloody theory. I need to get into the Greenhouses and actually use it."

Abdi took a deep breath and closed his own book. He was good at not getting drawn into Hugo's bad moods. His ability to stay calm and kind was one of the things Hugo found most impressive about his new friend.

"Sorry," Hugo said, pressing his fingers into his temples. "I'm sorry. I know you don't like it when people swear."

"You're frustrated," Abdi said with a shrug. "I get it."

Hugo shook his head. "It doesn't mean I should talk to you like that. It won't happen again."

"Let's take a break," Abdi suggested. "You're right. We already know all the Herbology theory. We might as well use use the time to relax."

"Yeah. It's not like we'll have much time to relax once the Greenhouses reopen. We've already missed a whole week of lessons. We have so much to catch up on."

Abdi shrugged again. "It'll be alright. Everyone's in the same position. And we're Ravenclaws: we're used to studying hard."

They packed away their books and quills. Hugo's fingers brushed against Abdi's hand several times as they both rummaged through their stacks of notes, trying to find their own possessions. Abdi looked down at the table and didn't catch Hugo's eye, but Hugo thought he noticed more pressure the next time Abdi's hand touched his own.

The corridors were quiet when they left the Library. Younger students were all in class, and most of the NEWT students spent their free periods in the Library or in their Common Rooms. Hugo and Abdi didn't speak as they walked down the corridor, but Hugo shuffled sideways to be closer to Abdi, letting their hands and arms bump into each other every so often.

Hugo couldn't make sense of his own behaviour. He'd never felt like this before. But he wanted to keep Abdi close to him, and every time his skin touched Abdi's he felt reassured.

After a while, Hugo became aware that Abdi kept turning to look at him. He could feel the other boy watching him as they walked, and it was a battle not to stop and turn to face him. Hugo's cheeks were burning. He hoped his blush wasn't visible.

Hugo could feel his breath getting quicker. He wanted to touch Abdi's hand again but now that Abdi was watching him he thought it might be too obviously deliberate.

He needn't have worried. Without saying anything, Abdi reached out to him and took his hand, wrapping his palm in warm, rough fingers.

Hugo twined his own fingers around Abdi's and released a breath.

He glanced sideways and found Abdi watching him again. Abdi smiled. This time, Hugo didn't really mind if Abdi noticed him blushing.

As they turned the corner, they heard voices coming from the other end of the corridor. Hugo loosened his grip on Abdi's hand, making sure that Abdi would feel able to let go if he wanted to, but Abdi held onto him.

They kept walking and Hugo suppressed a groan when he saw Lysander Scamander and Paige Parsons. Paige had her back against the wall and Lysander was holding on to her, whispering something against her neck.

Paige had an unreadable expression on her face but it cleared when she saw Hugo. She smiled her friendliest smile and pushed herself away from the wall.

"Hugo," she said warmly. "I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. How are you?"

Her eyes flickered to Hugo and Abdi's joined hands, but she didn't mention it.

Hugo decided not to bring up Paige's feud with Lily. They both knew there was a reason they hadn't been talking. He didn't need to remind Paige if she was choosing to feign ignorance.

Lysander saved Hugo the trouble of finding a response. He looked directly at Abdi and laughed.

"This isn't your usual company, Hugo," he said, his tone mocking. "Can't say I ever thought I'd see you traipsing around school with a Ravenclaw instead of with one of us."

This time, Abdi did drop Hugo's hand. Hugo immediately missed his warmth.

"I am a Ravenclaw," Hugo said.

Lysander laughed again, even though nothing was funny.

"Well, of course you are," he said, then leaned in conspiratorially. "But that's not all you've got going for you, is it?"

Paige was playing with her fingernails, looking bored. Hugo wanted to look at Abdi to make sure he was okay, but he was worried drawing attention to his friend might make Lysander pay him more attention.

Lysander kept talking, either not noticing or not caring about the fact the three people around him looked deeply uncomfortable.

"I'd be a little bit worried if I were you," Lysander whispered. "You've heard what they're saying about Lyra Goldstein? Killed by an aconite overdose?"

Hugo looked directly into his eyes, refusing to seem intimidated.

Lysander shrugged. "I mean, you're the little Herbology prodigy, aren't you? Longbottom lets you use the Greenhouses outside hours. And countless students have benefitted from your...access. Surely it's only a matter of time before suspicious eyes turn your way?"

Hugo didn't know what to say. He glanced at Abdi. Abdi was looking at the floor.

Lysander could obviously see how uncomfortable Hugo was. He looked victorious.

"Stop it, Lys," Paige said eventually. "Don't tease him."

She turned to Hugo, planting a smile back onto her face. "He doesn't mean it, Hugs. He's just trying to get a reaction out of you."

"Sure I am, baby," Lysander said, draping a lazy arm back over her shoulders.

Paige jumped slightly as Lysander's arm came down around her, but her smile didn't falter.

"Come on, you," Lysander said, tilting Paige's head up so she would kiss his cheek. "Let's go. I wasn't done with you."

Hugo watched Paige and Lysander walk away down the corridor and through a tapestry passageway. Something in the way Paige was walking made him keep looking at her until she was out of sight. She usually carried herself like a ballerina: back straight and legs long and confident. But today she was a little hunched over, and kept looking down at her feet.

Usually, Hugo would have spent more time contemplating this change in Paige's behaviour, but Lysander's words had shaken him and his mind was racing. His breath was speeding up and Abdi must have noticed, because he reached out and took Hugo's hand again.

"Are you okay?" Abdi asked, deep voice slow and concerned.

Hugo pulled his hand away from Abdi's grip.

"I need to find Lily," he gasped.

"Let me help you," Abdi said.

Hugo shook his head and rushed back in the direction they'd come from, not looking back to check whether Abdi was still there.

Lily would usually be in Herbology with them at this time, but she hadn't been in the Library with the majority of their class. Hugo thought he knew where to find her and didn't let him consider the possibility that he was wrong.

He charged up the stairs, not pausing once to catch his breath, and kept running even when the bell rang and other students started to emerge onto the staircase.

He didn't stop until he reached the Astronomy tower and saw Lily's curtain of red hair bent down over a vintage map of the sky.

He would have sighed with relief to see his cousin, but he was panicking and had just run up all those stairs and he couldn't regulate his breathing.

Lily must have heard his heavy breaths, or sensed his presence in some other way, because she turned to look at him. She was pale and looked tired, but she immediately jumped to her feet and placed both her hands on Hugo's shoulders.

"Hey," she said softly.

Being near her, Hugo started to relax.

"Lily, I fucked up," he said.

"Yeah?" Lily didn't seem worried. She had a remarkable ability to remain calm whatever was going on around her.

"I don't know what to do," he admitted.

Lily led him over to the window and they sat down on the window ledge. She tucked her feet up under herself and then cocked her head to one side to listen.

"The back to school party," Hugo began. "I did something really stupid."

"I remember," Lily said bluntly. "But you learnt your lesson. No more meddling with potions you don't understand."

"I know. I do. But that potion...I didn't tell you what I did to it."

Lily frowned but let him keep speaking.

"Lily...I added aconite."

They were silent for a few moments, both staring at each other. Hugo couldn't believe he'd actually said the words out loud. He thought Lily might have guessed that he might be responsible for the aconite leaving the Greenhouse, but until now he hadn't been able to confess to what he'd really done.

"I see," Lily said. She didn't look angry. She just reached out and squeezed Hugo's hand.

"I'd done it before," Hugo explained. "The euphoria elixir sometimes makes me anxious, you know? Or just makes me want to go to sleep. Adding a little bit of aconite usually keeps me awake and keeps my emotions under control. But I guess I got the dosage a little bit wrong that night because it just made me really sick."

"I know. I remember."

Hugo closed his eyes for a moment. "You know what I'm going to tell you now, don't you?"

Lily didn't respond. She just waited for Hugo to speak and didn't let go of his hand. Part of him wanted to backtrack now, and just claim he'd been the only one to drink the potion, but it felt good to finally tell someone this.

"It was Lyra's first party," he whispered. "She came to me in the Common Room before we left and said she was scared and needed something to ease the nerves. I felt bad for her."

"Oh, Hugo," Lily sighed.

"I thought I was helping her," he confessed. "I was taking it myself. I didn't think it could hurt her. But now they're saying she died because of an aconite overdose."

"I know."

"Lily, I gave it to her. It's my fault."

Lily shook her head.

"It is," Hugo continued. "I think...I mean, I'm the reason she's dead, aren't I? I killed her."

He had tears in his eyes now. In some ways he wished Lily would lose her cool and match his own anxiety. It was reassuring that his cousin stayed so calm, but at the same time he wanted someone else to feel what he was feeling.

"You didn't kill her," Lily said. "You had no idea what was going to happen."

"She's still dead."

Lily shrugged. To someone else, it might have looked like a cruel gesture in the face of someone's death. But Hugo understood Lily. She was trying to protect his feelings.

"It was her choice to drink it," Lily said. "And if she hadn't got it from you she might well have got something equally bad somewhere else. Don't feel like you're accountable for her bad choices."

"You think that'll make a difference to the school? They're looking into people stealing things from the Greenhouses. It's only a matter of time before they start to look at me. And however you spin it, Lily, she's dead because of something I stole and then gave her."

"Mmm."

"They'll kick me out," Hugo said, voice cracking. "I'll never get my NEWTs or be able to be a Herbologist. And that's if I'm lucky. I don't know how involved Magical Law Enforcement is. I might even be looking at prison."

"No, you won't."

"I will!" Hugo's voice was rising now. "And I deserve it. I did it, didn't I? Maybe I should be punished!."

Lily stood up.

"Don't be silly, Hugo," she said. "What's done is done. Ruining your own life won't fix anything."

"So what do I do?"

Lily took a moment to breathe and shook out her thick waves of hair. Something had changed in her since her fall out with Paige. She looked more fragile than Hugo was used to, and was much more isolated. But she still seemed completely in control. He trusted her.

"Leave it with me," Lily instructed. "I'll fix this."