AUTHORS NOTE: This Chap will be Jaspers P.O.V. I'm not going to do this often. Maybe 2 more through out the story and they'll be a summary of what he thinks :) Tell me what you think! oh! Mind-raper belongs to Lady Skyelite who's reviews i adore :)
Jasper P.O.V.
I couldn't believe this tiny feisty little human trusts me enough to lay in my arms. She was small. But not as nearly small as Alice, who was a fucking pixie in true form. She had grown since I had last seen her. The roundness of her face was gone. Traces of child hood no longer there. Her cheek bones were more prominent. The shaggy blue hair she now had made me smile. I did wish that her hair would be a little longer before she was changed. It was an inch or two above her shoulders now. At least it wasnt the twelve-year-old boy cut Alice had. She wanted to become a vampire. Still. After all she's been through. I can see her like me. Pale and fierce. Her angry kitten nature would turn into a vicious tiger. I would love to see her like that. I was going to see her like that. She didnt want Edward back at all. That I was more than pleased. I never liked that mind-raper. They didnt look right together. Even though she looked so happy with him there was something always off about the emotions. I always knew it would never last.
When you sit back and watch, you learn alot. I observed the Cullens. I was there solely for Alice and that I wanted to learn control. Carlisle was a natural leader, as was I. I couldn't have a larger role in the family or we would butt heads. I loved Emmett like a brother. Who couldnt love the huge teddy bear. Rosalie despite her natural bitchy-ness cared more than anyone in that household. She was trying to frighten Bella away. Didn't work the little freak doesnt get scared. Esme wanted to be a mother so badly. But mine died long ago and I was a grown ass man. Carlisle was a good friend. Not a father. Edward and I never got along. He hated me. Could have been when I was first in the family and Edward took to Alice so quickly... He wouldnt leave her alone. It got where I couldn't take it and Edward lost an arm.
I chuckled at the memory and made sure Bella didn't wake. He didn't fuck with me after that though. His arm used to twitch if I growled. I'd have to tell Bella that story. She'd get a kick out of it. When it came to women I believed they needed to be treated right. She wasnt with Edward. I should have spoken up. So many should of's. There was many questions with Isabella.
How could I talk to her? I couldn't with Peter or Charlie. Before I came back to Forks I was in complete hell. My guilt for Bella was so intense I had to send her a letter, something. I never thought they'd leave her. Someone so sweet, so pure. She was alone out here. With our laws! With Victoria on the loose. Stupid fucker. If I ever saw fuckward again I'd more than likely kill him. Something that stupid is a waste of complete space. When I saw the wide eyed human, everything changed. Click! I had the motivation to move on. I didn't understand it. I still dont.
How could she not fear me? How could she stand to be around me? How could she not blame me for the Cullens leaving? Better yet, why did I care? I always had. I never knew why. I tried to brush it off as it was because Alice cared for her so. After Edward told us of her and banned me from killing her like I wanted, I didnt listen. I went to her home, I was going to go into her room and kill her. Destroy the threat against the family. Be the bad guy. I couldnt. I was glued to the tree. So innocent. I couldnt move a muscle closer to her. If Edward ever knew I went there, he never mentioned it.
Peter and Charlotte cared for her instantly. It was astounding how easily they took to her. She was always like that. She has this habit of making people happy and protective of her. The Cullens, the wolves, my brother and sister. Me. How? I dont know. I didn't like not knowing. I liked having a plan. I was a military man. I didn't like not knowing what to do. I depended on Alice so much. Telling me what to wear, where to be, what to say, what will happen when I say or do a certain thing. Maria telling me who to kill, when where, how bloody. The army telling me where to go and the plan. I couldnt stand on my own anymore. I hated it.
Bella, the crazy little thing, she never once told me what to do. I adored her for that. I adored her for the way she could make me smile. She had become my best friend so quickly. I wanted to know her more. I wanted to be able to have time to just be silly and happy. I just had to take care of Victoria. We couldn't do it on our own. Even if we changed Bella. I had to call in some freinds. The wolves would be a tremendous help, but that little fucker that made my Isabella cry would never come near her again. Not unless I was a smoking pile of ashes.
My Isabella? I frowned. She wasnt mine, she would never be. She was accepting but she'd never want me like that. Did I even want her like that? I didn't know. What if she did but it wasn't enough and she found some one better? I couldn't take it if I was left alone again. Not by her. Not by this angel. This fallen angel that cursed like a sailor a times, wanted to get a tattoo, had several piercings on her ears, hung out with vampires, wasnt afraid of them, even wanted to be one. She was strong. A warrior when she was angry. I feared her glare would ever turn on me. She'd be truly frightening as a vampire. My frown turned into a smile at that image. I'd figure out the rest down the road.
I looked down at her angel's face. She was so peaceful like this. I closed my eyes and let myself feel her emotions fully. It was the closest thing to sleep I could ever have anymore.