Silence is Forbidden Chapter 14: Downhill, a twilight fanfic

Story Name: Silence is Forbidden

Chapter Name: Downhill

Summary: Rosalie Hale struggles to accept herself. She's been left broken, both mentally and physically. The nightmares are catching up to her, the silence is rare. Rosalie can't control them, she can't accept them. She's lost. What other secrets does she hide behind her mask? Will the new people in her life be able to help her, or will she be lost forever? *better than it sounds.* Rated M for scenes of self-harm and sensitive content.

Main Characters:

Lillian and Gregory Hale, Rosalie Hale, Jasper Hale, Judson Hale.

Esme Cullen, Carlisle Cullen, Bella Cullen, Edward Cullen, Emmett Cullen, Alice Cullen.

Dedication: To all the wonderful souls out there that have suffered bullying, abuse & any other hard time. My heart of love goes out to you. I wish you the best for the future. Keep on fighting, you are strong. You can do it, you just have to believe! God bless you.

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2 weeks later

Alice finished brushing Rosalie's hair against the pillow and came back over to sit beside me. We were sat in Rosalie's hospital room, watching her peaceful form and listening to the sound of the monitors.

The doctors had found a small mass on the scan, said to be related to the mental illness but it didn't seem logical. Of course Rosalie had physical symptoms linked to the schizophrenia but I didn't think hallucinating about purple people and not being able to recognize who we were was one of them.

She also shouldn't have had any problems with breathing by herself, but here we were, day 14 of her stuck on a ventilator and various tubes in her chest. I longed to stare into those violet, warm eyes once more but needed to wait until she rose on her own.

Her brothers had breezed by to visit her but found the whole thing distressing. No one in Rose's family was comfortable with the idea of Rose having Schizophrenia. They would rather that we 'dealt' with her. It just made me sad.

It was 2pm in the afternoon when the first changes started occurring. Rose tightened her hand softly around mine and tried to muster some sound despite the tubes. It was feeble attempt; one that caused the monitors to soar.

I smiled in relief, pressing the button to call Carlisle to the room.

He came in an instance, saw my relieved expression and made his way over to Rosalie. Brushing the smooth locks out of the way of her face, he rested his hand on her forehead. "Rosalie, dear?" He murmured, lovingly. He had grown protective and was just like a father figure. "Can you hear me?"

Another grumbled escaped her lips and I let out a small laugh. I thought I was going to lose her; I thought that she would never wake up. But she had and she was here.

Within 30 minutes, the tubes were disconnected and taken out and Rosie was sat up in the bed with a blanket tucked around her. Her face was pale, her eyes sunken in and purple, her cheekbones bruised and her lips pale pink. She was still beautiful to me, however sick she was.

"I still don't understand what happened." Her voice was still croaky and quiet from where the tubes had been down her throat.

I took her hand, once again fearful that she had forgotten all that had happened. "You had an episode remember Rosie? We brought you to the hospital and then you found it hard to breathe. After the scan, we couldn't get you to breathe on your own no matter how hard we tried so Carlisle decided to take over your breathing."

She stared at me, her eyes reminding me of those of a deer. After a few moments, she sighed and leaned back against the pillow.

"I remember trying to jump out of the window." She agreed quietly. "I thought that maybe I would kill the voices and I would…survive." She was so ashamed she wouldn't even look at me.

I lifted her chin and softly kissed her warm lips. "Don't be ashamed. You are fighting so hard."

"I'm afraid, Emmett." She admitted, looking at Carlisle only briefly before turning back to look at me. "I'm afraid that the voices will drive me so insane that I won't be able to cope, and then I'll have to just jump off a cliff or something or do something drastic like that just to silence them…"

Carlisle moved forward on his chair and briefly made a node on what Rosalie was saying. As her therapist and her doctor, it was important that he talked further with her about this.

"I'm sorry you feel like that." I told her sincerely. "But if we get you on the right medication and we help you as much as we can, then you can learn to block out the voices and you'll feel like you're in control of them."

She nodded and wrapped her hands around mine in comfort. I knew this was tearing her up and it hurt to have to watch her suffer like that. I just wanted to tear those voices away from her and give her comfort but I wasn't able to do that. It wasn't fair that people had to suffer in ways like that.

Esme came by the hospital room with a small bowl of homemade soup that Rosalie managed to eat and it seemed like for once everyone could relax as a family.

"When you come home, we're going to go home on a really big shopping trip so that we can buy you some new clothes. Oh, and we could do that nails and make-over's and stuff and…" Alice trailed off in pure excitement and I had to laugh at my pixie of a sister. Rosalie looked absolutely terrified, mouthing the words 'help' to me over the top of Alice's head.

"C'mon Alice, don't scare Rose before she's even gone home. Why don't we go look down in the gift shop?" Bella suggested, giving Edward a soft kiss before Alice yanked her out of the room screaming about balloons.

Rosalie giggled at the little façade and shook her head at me. "I really love this family. I really can't wait to leave the hospital so that we can continue on with life. If I'm around lots of people I may just forget about what's going on."

Carlisle discharged Rosalie the following evening and I carried her to the car like a small child. Everyone had thrown together a little welcome party at home for Rosie when she came in and I prayed that she would feel well enough to enjoy it. She was shivering against me and complained that her head throbbed. I was just glad that for now the voices were quiet and she was able to breathe by herself. It must have been such a relief for her to have peace in her head for even the smallest amount of time. I couldn't imagine ever having to hear thousands of voices in my head.

Everything was contented. I had my girl, she had me. She was feeling perhaps a little bit better and my family vowed to protect her. It was perfect.

If only I had seen the future on that day and prepared myself for the events that would happen over the next few months. Life was never an easy journey, and things were only about to go downhill.

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Thank you for the congratulations :) For those who were curious; the baby's name is Sylas Carlisle :)

I cuddled him the entire time I wrote this chapter. The cuddling helps him form a healthy attachment and helps his healing process as he feels secure and safe.

Even better news, his daddy has finally completed his physical therapy and can now walk fully without any assistance.

Everything just seems to be falling into place - I love my family, and most of all; I love my babies.

I also love my dedicated readers who leave reviews, favourites, story alerts, etc. Without any of this, my stories wouldn't be online or public.

I will be uploading a new story about Rosalie and Emmett very shortly called "I didn't mean to kill her." Please look out for that, and if you like this story I have Secrets for Heal also up and in progress.

Summary (secrets that kill is worth a read beforehand!):

Sequel to 'Secrets that Kill.' Rosalie's body is trapped in the spirit world and so the Cullen's must go in search for someone who can bring her body back - with a price of course. And are Edward and Bella healed or will they relapse with their disabled baby now in the mix? *Mature themes-dark pasts.*

links :

www . fanfiction s/ 6848601 / 1 / Secrets-That-Kill

www . fanfiction s/ 8480630 /1/ Secrets-That-Heal