A/N: Today's fun fact: Snails are hermaphrodites - to determine which snail is the 'father' the two partners 'fight' during procreation. Whoever stabs the other first with its love dart wins, and can inseminate its partner. Similarly, flat worms perform so-called penis fencing to determine the 'father' during sex.
Tetsuya knows exactly what he can expect. But there is only so much a three year old or a five year old can carry from early memory into adulthood. He's been here before, he knows what will happen, but nothing prepares him for the force of his memory.
The room is empty this time, no incense burning his nostrils, no chanting filling the air. Just his brother and Akashi and so much red spread on a grey stone altar. It doesn't help that most of the color comes from hair and attire.
There is blood too.
"I had a bet going that you would show up to save your spouse. So I got to thank you Tsuya, I got a free ride thanks to you." It's more painful than he'd imagined to see his brother again. It's the face that greets him in the mirror every day, and yet it's something irreconcilable with his self image. They're the two sides of the same coin - two sides that'll never be able to meet on the same ground.
"Let him go." Tetsuya says with more calm than he feels.
Akashi moves, struggling against Toru's grasp in his hair. He turns his head and the look on his face is something Tetsuya knows he will never forget. His face is pale enough to make his red eyes stand out in stark contrast. There's pain etched there, more than a cut to the neck would account for, but more prominent than that is the complicated mix of emotions in his eyes. The disbelief-colored surprise, shock and fear and that small almost invisible part of hope and something else - Tetsuya can feel his heart shattering in his chest.
"Let him go? Why? Shouldn't you be grateful for his sacrifice? This was your place. Maybe his life will be enough to pay for your failure, hm? Wouldn't it be nice if you could keep living?" His face twists into an ugly sneer. "I don't know about the hereditary line, but you might get an Empire out of it. You never really understood, did you? I'm the only one who looks out for you, who has your real best interest in mind."
Akashi's lips move, but no sound comes out. The image blurs, superimposed with the memory of his mother on that very same altar, eyes vacant and lips moving on words that won't come.
Toru's eyes light up. "But that wouldn't work for you, would it now? Sitting on a golden throne doesn't become people like us." Toru reaches down and does something to Akashi Tetsuya can't see, but the sound Akashi makes has his blood run cold. It's not a scream, just barely so, but the sheer pain contained in that one sound tears on Tetsuya's heart. Akashi who can make an entire room fall to their knees with his presence alone, now can barely hold back a scream.
"I wouldn't recommend you taking another step forward Tsuya." Tetsuya hadn't even realized he'd moved. "I want to take my sweet time with this one. After all, he shares our precious blood. Ah, but this is supposed to follow a certain ritual, isn't it?" Toru flips the knife in his hand and rests it against Akashi's neck. There's a thin red line already; Toru adds another. Akashi doesn't even seem to register it.
"But that's always been the problem. Lies, all of it." Toru laughs, a dry and bitter sound, unlike any other Tetsuya had ever heard from him. "What kind of Gods would allow for this farce?" He digs the tip of the blade into the junction between collar bone and neck. Akashi's eyes widen for a moment before he clamps down on whatever sound threatens to rise.
"What kind of humans would continue to serve greedy Gods like that?" He yanks the knife out and throws it at Tetsuya's feet. Blood splatters on his shoes. "Why bother with a stupid ritual, when you can just take what you want? But grandmother would not see that. This mountain is a prison, while the entire world lies out there for us to take." His eyes settle on Tetsuya, hard. "Your world."
"Toru." Tetsuya says evenly. He feels calm but also cold to the bone. The world has slowed down around him. Everything has been reduced to the beating of his pulse and the slow steady trickle of blood pulsing from Akashi's neck that matches his own pulse beat for beat. "His blood is useless to you. Let him go."
"Or what?" Toru's hand is still on Akashi's neck, but the knife is out of his reach. "You see. You can't lay a finger on me. Except you sacrifice your dear husband." Toru's lips pull into a cruel smirk. "It does bear some irony does it? What do you say you pay him back for that little stunt he pulled on you? I mean I could have thrown him down the stairs too, but isn't there a certain beauty in having you do it? I mean you do have a quite impressive track record."
It's pointless to argue. He had known that from the beginning. Toru was never going to listen to reason.
"Is that what this is going to be?" Tetsuya bends down to pick up the bloodied knife. He flicks off the blood before throwing it far out of range behind him. He lets his own follow moments later. "I'll make this simple for you. You die. I live." He flicks his eyes down to Akashi, who has yet to say a thing. "He lives." Riko would be mad. Kagami would be disappointed, but he can't keep his promise. Knife or no knife, this will end with his brother's blood on his hands.
So be it.
He sinks into the calm steel and ice, feels it trickle through his veins. Time comes to a stuttering halt, only for a moment, before it accelerates again. If this is what he has to do to save Akashi, he'll gladly sacrifice his soul. He should probably be concerned about how easily he is swayed into letting go, how easy it is to make the decision when Akashi's life is on the line. He doesn't care. The world is bright and sharp and crystal clear.
"Tetsuya." The voice is weak and strained - Akashi. Something pulses in his chest, his foolish heart trying to remember warmth. He won't be swayed.
"That's right." Toru drops Akashi who groans in pain and curls around his hand. Only now does Tetsuya see the odd angle of his fingers. "Nothing comes without a price." Toru moves so fast Tetsuya can barely make out the movement, even with his heightened state of perception. He twists Akashi's finger - broken most likely - until Akashi's scream echoes through the underground chamber.
"You can kill me, but at what price?"
Tetsuya moves. On a rational analytical level he knows it's too risky. Toru is at an advantage and could easily kill Akashi in the time he needs to reach him, but he doesn't care - right at that moment nothing matters compared to his thirst for Toru's blood.
Toru drops Akashi's hand and moves around the altar to meet him. He dodges Tetsuya and drives his fist into his stomach but Tetsuya doesn't even feel it. The ice in his body keeps away all the pain - old and new alike. Tetsuya spins and jams his elbow against the back of his brother's neck. Something skims his arm, skin breaks but it all drowns in icy cold.
Toru recovers quickly enough, but Tetsuya's still a beat faster. He grabs Toru's arm and twists it behind his back before pushing a finger into his pulse point. Toru freezes.
"Any last words, brother?" Tetsuya says. His voice sounds hollow.
Toru tenses but he doesn't attempt to fight back. Instead he laughs. Short and harsh. "Is this the end you want for us? I die in your stead? You think the Gods would accept me when they spit out you? What's that for a happy ending?"
"There are no happy endings. Only endings." Tetsuya shifts until the tension on Toru's arm is at its maximum. He could draw it out, make Toru pay for every little sin of his life, but the passion in Tetsuya has vanished along with his other emotions. Even his overwhelming thirst for blood is gone. All what's left is ice and steel.
Toru smiles. "You think I would let it end like that Tsuya?" His voice is almost gentle. "That's not my style, isn't that right Jiro?"
Tetsuya's eyes snap up and there is Furuhashi in the entrance to the temple, and in his arms a limp and motionless Kagami. He hesitates, but doesn't know why. It shouldn't matter in the face if his frozen conviction.
"Go ahead," Toru whispers. "Kill me. Bring an end to it. You're immune to my poison, but Taiga isn't." The wound on his arm, a tiny cut, barely bleeding, but he doesn't need to feel the pain to know it was more than just a simple cut. Toru's weapons are always poisoned.
Something about that thought cracks his carefully crafted barrier of ice. Reality seems to break into pieces around him, reassemble itself and break again. Again and again. Every time the image he sees has changed a little more. No. He changes with every break and reassembling.
"Jiro has the antidote." Toru says with a cold and knowing smile. "Enough for one. I don't know about your husband, but Taiga's got some minutes left in him." There had been something odd about Akashi's state. Aside from broken fingers and shallow cuts there had been nothing wrong with him. And yet he had seemed so weak.
How long?
He tightens his grip on Toru and lifts his hand. It would be quick and he would be finally free from his brother's shadow. He clings to the fleeting feeling of cold in his body, the shield that infallibly protects his mind from pain, but it's thawed away by the heat of his emotions.
He can't.
"You're lying." His voice is breaking.
"Positively. But the thing is you don't know what I'm lying about. And you don't have the time to find out. So what's it going to be? Turning this temple into a mass grave has something undeniably romantic, don't you think."
Tetsuya drops his hand, but twists Toru's arm further. He wants to turn around and look at Akashi, desperately. He wants to reassure himself that it's not too late yet, that he's still breathing, but he can't take his eyes away from the threats in front of him.
"Give me the antidote."
Furuhashi rolls his eyes. "Sure and then you'll just kill Toru. I should be offended at how stupid you think I am."
"Put it down over there." Tetsuya's heart is beating so hard it's threatening to break free from his chest. He watches with sweat beading on his face as Jiro puts a small vial with a clear liquid on the stone floor. He then retreats next to Kagami's lifeless form.
So many openings for lies.
He should just break Toru's neck and risk a confrontation with Furuhashi. But he can't. The thought of putting either of the two men in danger has his throat constrict. The darkness - so willing to ease his pains earlier, all the slick promises and reassurances - it's all gone now.
"Away from him." He directs and Furuhashi shuffles away with another exasperated eye roll.
"Happy?"
He shoves Toru forward and into Furuhashi's arm, while immediately diving for the vial. He didn't need to bother as neither Toru nor Furuhashi have made a move for it.
"I'm quite disappointed to be honest." Toru says after fixing himself up. "That you'd abandon all that cold calculation for the likes of these. You had the upper hand and you could have walked out of this with my blood on your hands." All the taunting and the playful cruelty are gone. All Toru has for him now is disgust. "I could have backstabbed you so easily, you knew that. And yet." His eyes flicker from Kagami to Akashi.
"I guess this settles it once and for all. You're simply lacking in everything. What a shame. I had such high hopes for you." He waves his hand for Furuhashi to follow him when he makes his way out of the temple.
Tetsuya doesn't wait to watch him go. He dashes forward to check Kagami's pulse only to find it fluttering weakly under his finger tips. He turns around and sees Akashi looking at him with a feverish expression in his eyes. He blinks sluggishly once and Tetsuya feels a wave of relief wash over him.
"Kuro…" Kagami's hand grasps feebly at his sleeve.
"Don't speak." Tetsuya urges and presses a hand to Kagami's cheek. He has only antidote for one person, if it even is the antidote. The cut on his forearm burns but there are no other effects. His stomach feels sore from Toru's attack and his body is still suffering from various bruises, but as far as he can tell, he's not affected by the poison.
"Th… poi…on." Kagami's breathing is shallow and he has to fight for every single syllable. His hand on Tetsuya's sleeve tightens marginally before relaxing again.
Tetsuya doesn't know what to do.
"…s made… his blood…" Kagami tries to say something more but no more sound comes out.
Tetsuya's dangerously close to panicking. Right now two people are dying and he has the means to save only one of them. And he can't even begin to figure out what Kagami is trying to tell him.
"Tetsuya." Akashi's voice sounds oddly clear through the chaos in his mind. He rests Kagami's head and turns around to look at Akashi. Akashi has pushed himself into a half sitting position, resting heavily on his arms. There's still blood dripping from his neck, but he seems in a much better state than Kagami.
Kagami… who must have been poisoned only a short while before Furuhashi dragged him in. Kagami who seems unharmed save for a small cut on his cheek.
"It's alright." Akashi is smiling, but it seems to drain all the energy from him to do just that. "Save him. It's only fair that I pay for my sins. It's okay as long as you're free, Tetsuya." Akashi collapses forward, clinging to the edge of the altar to keep himself from falling off.
"It's alright. I wouldn't mind dying if it were for you." He whispers against the cold stone of the altar. "Our blood is the same. I can pay for your sins too." Tears mix in with the blood from his neck wound.
Ah, he's been so stupid. Tetsuya realizes what Kagami has been trying to tell him. The reason why he isn't affected. The poison is made from Toru's blood. It can't affect his twin and it will have a lesser effect on Akashi who shares their blood, even if it's just a little.
It might not be enough.
He picks up the vial with shaking fingers. He's crying, a desperate stream of tears that can't wash away the pain in his heart. Akashi watches as he pulls out the stopper and puts the vial to Kagami's lips.
Despite his words, despite the smile he still forces on his lips, Akashi can't hide the hurt in his eyes - regret.
Kagami swallows after Tetsuya tilts his head up. His breathing evens out immediately. There's nothing left in the vial. What did Toru hope for? That he would use the antidote on Akashi and let Kagami die? Would he have done it if he hadn't known?
Tetsuya can't find the answer.
His limbs feel heavy when he walks over to Akashi. Kagami is asleep but the pained expression has disappeared from his face.
Akashi reaches out a hand, shaking with the effort and Tetsuya catches it in his. He might still die. They need to get out of here but Tetsuya is wounded and alone. He can't carry the both of them - he can't even carry one. All he can give Akashi now is the warmth of his body.
"I don't regret…" Akashi's eyes move to Kagami, sluggish and the usually sharp expression is dulled. "I am glad… I was able to meet… you." Akashi's smile falters and his vision goes out of focus for a moment before falling back on Tetsuya. "I only wish… tell me Tetsuya, would you… have ever forgiven me?"
Tears drop from Tetsuya's face on Akashi's. He can barely make out Akashi's features as his world disappears in a blur. "That's the wrong thing to ask."
Akashi's voice is barely more than a breath. "I'm glad then…" Another tear drops and lands on Akashi's lip. "May my life pay for your sins… I love you Tetsuya." His hand falls limply from Tetsuya's grasp.
Remember, his mother's voice says through the fog of his mind. Remember.
And finally, he does.
Their first kiss tastes of salt and copper, blood welling from the newly opened teeth wound on Tetsuya's lips. He desperately hopes it won't be their last.
He's in his mother's garden, the smell of flowers fills the air and for a moment it's all that has ever existed in Tetsuya's life. But this is merely a memory.
His mother warned him away from the roses and their thorns but the rest of the garden is open for him. Kuroko Shiina sits in her usual reclining chair, legs stretched wide and watching over her young son as he makes his way through her garden.
Tetsuya finds a patch of small white flowers, petals in the shape of small bells and he wonders if they chime when he shakes them.
"Don't touch them." His mother calls and Tetsuya drops his hands. "They're bad flowers."
"But they are pretty." Tetsuya has just turned three, but he'd always shown aptitude for learning, be it speech or other things. So when his mother beckons him closer, he follows.
She lifts him up on her lap, the flower crown he had woven for her earlier askew on her head. "They are called lily of the valley." She starts with a smile. "But here we call them May bells."
"They look like bells." Tetsuya claps his chubby little hands together, delighted that he made the connection.
"Yes, but they are special bells. It is said that people whose death is imminent can hear them chime." A sadness that Tetsuya didn't understand back then crosses her face. He understands now, but it is far too late to change the outcome.
"Do you hear them?" Three year old Tetsuya does not understand the gravity of what his mother has said, nor does he understand why her smile falters and she looks away from him.
"Hearing them is not a good thing, Tetsu-chan. You should hope you never will. Something bad happens when you do."
"But if I hear it before the bad stuff happens, I can do something against it?" Tetsuya frowns. He has yet to understand the meaning of death and fate.
"It's not that simple." Shiina runs a hand through her son's hair. "You see. May bells are pretty little flowers, but they are also poisonous."
"Poisonoos?" Tetsuya tries his tongue around the new word. He's heard it before, but something about the way his mother says it is different.
"Yes, it means one touch can kill you." Tetsuya does not understand. Shiina takes his hand and lifts it to her chest. "Can you feel that?"
"Heartbeat?" Tetsuya asks.
"Yes. Touching one of those flowers will stop your heartbeat and your body will turn all cold and you can no longer move."
"Oh," Tetsuya blinks, "That sounds not good."
"It isn't. So please Tetsu-chan, never listen to a May bell."
"I won't," Tetsuya promises, clasping his mother's hands in earnest sincerity.
Shiina bends to place a kiss on his forehead. "Good boy."
"Say Mama, what did grandmother mean when she said our blood was poison?"
"Where did you…?" Shiina sighs. "I told you not to sneak around." She smoothes a hand through his hair. "It means that our blood is just like that flower. It can be turned into a deadly poison. It's a curse from the Gods."
"A curse? But grandmother said it's a blessing."
"Yes, she would say that. But I believe it is a curse. A punishment the Gods have devised for us."
"Why would they do that?"
"I wonder…" She smiles again, but for a reason Tetsuya can't comprehend her cheeks are wet as though she's crying.
"Don't cry, mother." Tetsuya touches a hand to his mother's cheek, but the tears won't stop.
"It's alright Tetsu-chan. Sometimes mothers just need to cry for no reason at all." She smiles through her tears.
"Did you kill someone with your blood?" It seems an innocent enough connection in his mind. After all, his concept of death is still a simple one.
"No." Shiina rubs her eyes clear from the tears. "Blood alone is not enough. You have to offer something of yourself in exchange. Everything has its price, be it power or be it the means to an end. In that way we and that flower are the same. People long for us the same way you long to touch the flower, but once they come too close we only bring ruin.
"It's a sad thing to be a poisonous flower."
Tetsuya looks at the patch of white flowers. Even now he can still smell their scent in the air. "The flowers aren't alone though." He says and smiles at his mother, because sometimes sons just need to smile at their mothers to show them that crying for no reason is okay. "They have each other."
"Yes," Shiina's smile is wet but heartfelt. "The flower's poison can't harm her or her brethren. And it's more than just that. The same as those flowers, we don't just hold the poison, we also hold the cure. The Gods may be cruel, but they always offer a path for redemption. At least that's what I want to belief. Remember that Tetsu-chan. Your blood is more than just poison."
Shiina lifts her son from her lap and puts him back on his own two legs. He watches her with wide blue eyes, still trying to comprehend what she said. He won't for a very long time, so eventually he will simply forget this conversation.
"Remember Tetsu-chan, the question almost always holds the answer."
Seijuro has a weird dream. In his dream Tetsuya is kissing him. The kiss has an odd taste to it, salty and a bit like iron, but it's warm against the cold that resides in the rest of his body. He wants to hold on to that feeling forever but it slips through his grasp like water.
If this is what dying feels like, it really isn't so bad.
Seijuro wakes with a shock. Something's dragged him from his sleep - if one could even call it that - and it takes him longer to process than it should. Too much has happened and he shouldn't even be alive, but he is and he has no idea why. He's in an unfamiliar room, but if the style is anything to go by he's at least somewhere in the Teikou stronghold as wooden shoji walls and tatami mats seem to have been prevalent there. The golden light of sunrise falls through the milky paper windows.
He is fine aside from some residual fatigue in his body, the splint fixing his fingers in place and the stiff feeling of bandages around his neck. But there is a definite feeling of alarm that keeps his senses alert. He still doesn't know what woke him, only that it wasn't natural.
Seijuro shakes off the futon he's been lying in and gets to his feet. The room is empty save for him and the futon, so it must have been something from outside. He gets as far as the door before he hears the same sound that must have woken him.
It's a scraping sound, like something heavy dragged over the floor and it is coming from right outside his room. Seijuro retreats to the wall, checks out the window, but it seems the wooden frames have been arrested to bar from opening. He has too little overview of this situation to clearly determine if it's a threat or not. As of now, it could be anything.
The door to his room slides open. Shirai Toru walks in; dragging behind him what seems to be the lifeless body of his subordinate Jiro. Now Seijuro can hear the faint sounds of fighting, shouts and screams and even the distinct noise of metal striking metal.
Just what is going on?
Toru is covered in blood; one side of his face seems to have come in close contact with the ground as it is streaked with dirt and bloody scratches. He comes to a sudden halt when he spots Seijuro, eyes wide in surprise before his face settles on something oddly close to resignation.
"You have no place to be here." The words are bitter. Toru drops Jiro's leg he had used to pull him along. The man doesn't give any sign he's bothered by the treatment.
"Well, it wasn't exactly my decision." Seijuro says with a dismissive shrug.
Toru grimaces. "This was my mother's room, but I suppose that means little to you."
"You're right I couldn't care less about your leftover mommy issues."
"Right, you have too many of your own, don't you?"
Seijuro doesn't sink low enough to reward Toru with a visible reaction, but he does feel a certain sting. This is not something he'd ever allow the likes of Toru to see.
"I could say a number of things right now, but quite honestly I don't see the point." Seijuro leans against the wall, feeling the wood give just slightly under his weight. "You're at the end of your line, so I suppose you came here to die? Please, by all means, don't mind me. Get on with it."
"Die." Toru spits the word out as if it's poison. "I won't make it that easy for you. It's you who should have died. I'm not that surprised that you didn't. Tsuya always had a way to mess with my plans, but I am curious as to how he did it."
As far as Seijuro can tell, Toru has no weapon on him, but he is entirely too calm for the situation. He doesn't seem too pressured about the current circumstances and that has Seijuro worried. He doesn't feel too good, and there is the matter of his busted left hand, but Toru is in at least as bad as a state. He should be able to take him should it come to a fight. "I couldn't have lived with myself if I'd left Tetsuya to the likes of you. I suppose he felt similar." Seijuro says with no small amount of sardonic amusement.
"Why don't you tell me?" Toru smiles that small hidden smile that is all Tetsuya and Seijuro wants to wipe it from his face, to never see Tetsuya's beautiful smile misplaced again. It's not his place to impersonate someone as pure as Tetsuya.
Toru raises an eyebrow. "I guess that means no." He shrugs and then winces. "It is of little matter now." His eyes hold an odd expression, and Seijuro is back to thinking how misplaced his behavior seems.
He remembers Kagami's words, the message he attempted to pass on and Seijuro realizes that it wasn't a dream. He can still taste the faint tang of copper on his tongue. To think what Tetsuya was willing to give to save him. Something about Toru's appearance, the dull glint of something in his eyes that spells wrong tells him there is not much time left. He just doesn't know for which one of them.
"There is one thing I don't understand." Seijuro says in a conversational tone. Toru's lips curl just slightly but he doesn't say whatever is on his mind. "You set all this up to lure in Tetsuya and yet you didn't try once to kill him."
Toru's expression morphs, surprise turns into a slightly off kilter smirk, as though he's trying for nonchalance but failing just so. "Who says it wasn't about you?"
"Assuming that would insult both our intellects." Seijuro allows himself to scoff. "Did you think he would join you? I suppose it does have a certain poetic aesthetic to it, but this isn't exactly your style, is it now? And it certainly isn't Tetsuya's. So what was the point of all of this?"
For a moment Seijuro thinks Toru is going to attack him, but then his grimace smoothes out and he shows a small, albeit bitter smile. "It should be obvious, shouldn't it? He is my twin. What punishment awaits one who raises his hand against not just their own blood but their twin? A twin that was also protected by divine decree? Not a hand must be laid on the sacrifice, except for the day of the sacrifice, as the life that is given is a gift sanctified by divine will - no mortal shall mess with the will of the Gods." The last part seems to be a quote of sorts, as Toru's eyes grow distant as he recites it. "He was born to grant me happiness. Yet, he didn't die and I was barred from punishing him. He watched mother die. How could I not hate him?"
"And you let that stop you?" Seijuro forces the impassiveness in his voice. That part of him has outlived its use, but he's watched long enough through his other self's eyes to understand a certain truth about what lies in his heart. What lies in Toru's heart as well. "Gods are just a construct of the human mind. To have something in the palm of your hand and not retaining it is unimaginable. A fool's endeavor can only end in failure."
"Shut up." Toru snaps and the calm is gone just like that. "I am the older brother. I am the ruler of Teikou and yet I could never escape Tsuya's shadow. Even now. Even now he evades me, because mother-" He cuts himself off and forces himself to breath a few times before he picks up again. "I do not need to justify myself to you. Your life has been saved on a whim but Tsuya will eventually tire of you. Like he has tired of me, and who could be closer to him than his own mirror image?"
Seijuro allows himself a display of objective dominance - a well-calculated smile. "All I hear is excuses. To think you held Tetsuya's attention for as long as you did. Look at yourself and tell me, he didn't have every reason to lose interest in you."
Toru's face contorts into a mask of anger. "How dare you-"
"Toru-kun." Tetsuya's quiet voice cuts through the room like a knife. The sound of fighting has stopped.
Something inside of Seijuro seems to twist painfully and then dissolve at the sight of Tetsuya. The relief that washes over him takes him by surprise. Tetsuya looks a bit ruffled and he's splattered with blood, but unlike Toru it doesn't seem to be his own. He swipes his eyes over Seijuro once, expression unreadable before settling on Toru.
"You've come to finish it? Took you long enough." Toru's laugh is bitter. His face is oddly pale, but Seijuro has an inkling it's not from the blood loss. He's worse for the wear, but most of the injuries seem superficial, although quite severe all the same.
Tetsuya looks at him for a moment, eyes cold and emotionless, before he sighs and the mask slips away, leaving an incredibly tired and sad expression. "No. There is no need."
Toru grits his teeth. "You want me to live that badly? Is that what your truth is all about? To make me see the error of my ways by forcing me to accept the reality?" His eyes flick down to Jiro for the barest of seconds but he pulls his gaze away with almost desperate force. "Just kill me Tetsuya. End it. So I can make amends to my son and my wife. Isn't that what you would like? I pay my sins in hell?"
"No," Tetsuya repeats. "It's not a matter as simple as that." Seijuro has never once heard him sound so weary. "Mariko is dead, but I had as much a hand in it than you did."
"What do… ah, so that's what it was. I should have known you had a hand in it. How does it feel to have infant's blood on your hands?"
"I didn't kill Ryouma. What made you think I ever could? I merely took him away from you."
The oddest change comes over Toru's face. The hard lines melt for a moment and give way to an open and almost vulnerable expression. Tears mix in with the sweat on his face, or maybe it is just Seijuro's imagination.
"You wouldn't dare lying to me about this, would you?" He sounds like someone else completely.
"You would see Shizuka die for your success, but Ryouma's death brings you to tears? How does it feel to pick deadly favors with your own children? How did it feel to find Mariko and know her death was on your hands?" Even while throwing his own question back at Toru, Tetsuya still sounds exhausted rather than spiteful.
The moment of vulnerability is gone from Toru's face. "I love my son. And I would have loved my daughter as well, if I had been allowed to." He sneers, but the effect is somewhat lost on his labored breathing. More and more it seems as though he's holding on to little more than a straw. "Don't presume to know what it means. I didn't have a choice."
Tetsuya sighs and shakes his head. "And that is where you are wrong, where you were always wrong. Your truth and my truth are two different things. I can't see your truth and you can't see mine." Tetsuya's smile is bone-weary. "I suppose you've made the matter of who's right ultimately inconsequential."
Toru chokes and bends to the side to throw up the contents of his stomach - as if right on cue to Tetsuya's words. When he looks back up at him, his eyes are wide and disbelieving. He grips a hand to his chest, heaving for shallow breaths that don't ever seem enough.
"The answer was always in your blood, in yours and in mine. But you never looked for the answer; you were content with the death you found there. It could have been so simple for you. But you could never see that your blood was your cure as well as your downfall."
Toru is on his knees, but even that seems to be a lot of effort. "There is no cure for the likes of us." Toru has to struggle to get out the words. Something is wrong. He didn't seem that badly hurt, bruised up and beaten, but nothing life-threatening. "Why do you think we buy our fortune with the blood of our children? That is our cure - our salvation."
"Everything has two sides to it. We don't buy the cure with our blood. We are cursed for the blood we sacrifice. Or maybe it has nothing to do with either of it. Maybe we just went wrong at one point and never stopped to look back. Maybe you made the choice for all of us. Our blood may hold the answer or it may not. It doesn't matter now. It all ends here with you. Everything has its price. It is simply time for you to pay yours."
"What did you do?" Toru gasps for air, eyes bulging and now Seijuro can finally place the symptoms.
"Nothing." Tetsuya says as he walks slowly through the room, past his brother and closer to the spot where Seijuro rests against the wall. "I have done nothing and that is why you are dying."
"Ah." Toru exhales on a shaky little sigh. "To think it would end like this. Mother must be laughing in her grave." He attempts a smile at Tetsuya but it falls short on the blood bubbling from his lips. His eyes glaze over and he sinks forward without any more strength left. His fingers drag over the floor, as though he is reaching for something that isn't there.
"I will be waiting for you in hell." He whispers, eyes fixed on Tetsuya and he pulls his mouth into one last twisted smile. Their eyes hold for a moment, before the gaze in Toru's break and he collapses to the floor.
"Nothing." Tetsuya repeats. He comes to a halt in front of Seijuro. Their eyes meet. Tetsuya seems tired, but something in his eyes lights up for just a moment as they lay look at each other.
"Tell me, will I ever be forgiven?" Tetsuya breathes before he collapses right into Seijuro's arms.
An indeterminable amount of time earlier
It's fitting in a way; Tetsuya can't help but think, for it to end here. The battle is won, although there is still resistance. Imayoshi has arrived earlier than expected, turning the tide just before the sun rose to greet a new day.
All that's left now…
"You see, when Jiro first brought me Akashi Seijuro I was delighted. To kill him in your stead, oh wouldn't that have been the sweetest irony? But of course it had to be my downfall too. Who would have thought he's so beloved among his subjects."
They're in his mother's garden. The air is heavy with the sweet fragrance of flowers, overpowering even the faint traces of smoke and the pungent stench of blood. The sun hasn't yet risen high enough to cast a light into this secluded part of the castle. And despite the absence of both stars and moon, the garden seems to be alighted by an otherworldly glow, as though they've transcended the barriers of their world.
He's followed Toru's traces after making sure that both Kagami and Akashi would recover. Kagami joined the fray soon after, as the antidote seemed to have eliminated all the traces of Toru's poison from his system. Akashi is still resting in his mother's room.
With that, all the players have made their move.
Furuhashi is bleeding from a wound to his gut; one Tetsuya knows he won't recover from. Toru knows it too, but he refuses to let go of his friend all the same. It's weird in a way, but maybe all the more fitting. For him to cling to something in what Tetsuya will make sure are his final moments.
It's too late for it to make a difference.
"It was obvious." Tetsuya replies. He's tired, too much blood and too much death, but this is the one thing he has to see to its end. "It is obvious. There are few who wouldn't die for him. That is not something you can say about yourself."
"So that's how it is? He's still alive. I wonder why you would go to such great lengths for a man who…" His eyes flicker for a moment. Light spills over the jagged edges of the rocky mountainsides, but the shadows around them don't waver. "Not even I went that far."
"Do you expect me to praise you for that? That you controlled your wish to possess me enough to let me go for a few months? That all you ever did was watch while someone else had me? That you abstained from ever laying a hand on my body because you were afraid of divine punishment? You actually dare to designate yourself judge on someone else's deeds and find them lacking compared to yours?"
Tetsuya takes a step forward. The grass rustles under his feet. "You dare lay your sins at my doorstep. Tell me, what does it say about the two of us that I am not even surprised?" A breeze picks up and rustles the leaves of the nearby trees. For a moment it sounds deafening in Tetsuya's ears. "It is of no matter now. I will see its end as I have seen its beginning."
"Is that your rage Tetsuya? Are you finally showing me your true face?" Toru smiles, an expression on his face Tetsuya has never seen before - happiness. Furuhashi who lies slumped against Toru's legs moans in pain. His eyes are dull and feverish; he no longer perceives the world around him. Soon enough one of them will have joined him.
Toru lifts his hand and reaches out the palm of it. In the center of it lie a few red berries. Behind him a few innocent flowers sway in the breeze.
"Mother's flowers." Toru's smile only brightens. "It's only fair that she is here with us now, isn't it? And since it's always been you, it has to be me just this one time."
He could have stopped him. He could have intervened or spoken up or do any number of things. Toru might have believed him. He might have let Tetsuya subdue him. He might have done a lot of things. But Tetsuya doesn't. He does nothing but watch as Toru swallows the small red berries, unaware of the death they hold within them.
"Do you hear the bells chime?" He asks instead.
Their fight after that is short and brutal, but Toru's already paying the price for his mistake. Tetsuya doesn't hurry in chasing after him and he doesn't hurry to intervene in his conversation with Akashi.
He is in no hurry to watch his brother die.