Chapter 14 – If I lay here
The Colonel walked slowly, and he had to admit tiredly, into the briefing room and watched as the men filed past and took their seats. He saw one man had been involved in a brawl at some point and knew that Roman had finally gained the men's respect. Especially when he noted that the latter didn't have a mark on him. He thought back to Ella and he wanted to take the man to one side and tell him about the children. Promising himself that he would do that first thing upon their return.
He watched as the British Army Captain pulled up the maps and showed them all, outlining the landing zones and terrain. He conducted the rest of the briefing. At the end of it Roman was asked to stay behind.
"Sir," he said.
"We've been wondering which one of the men you want as your spotter." The British captain began.
"That's easy, Sgt Thompson." He stated.
"Son, I'm sure you are aware that the Sgt is not part of this assignment." The Colonel told him.
"I'm aware of that Sir, but the fact is that I've worked with the Sgt before, we have a trust." He said.
The Captain looked across at the Colonel who nodded.
"Very well LT Harris bring him up to speed." The Captain said finally. "Dismissed LT."
Roman turned and walked away slowly. He was curious as to why they had acceded so easily and went off in search of the other man, finding him moments later in one of the barrack blocks.
"Jacko." He called.
The other man looked startled and hurriedly pushed something in his pocket. Ok, Roman thought, perhaps he had woken up this morning in the Twilight zone.
"L T." Jacko drawled.
"Have you got a minute?" Roman asked politely.
Jacko excused himself and followed Roman to his quarters.
"What is it LT?" Jacko asked quickly, once inside the room.
"Well for starters are you ok Jacko, you seem a bit nervous?" Roman asked.
"Sir, I'm fine." Jacko told him not quite meeting his eyes.
Roman nodded and proceeded to bring the other man up to speed on the mission.
"And Colonel Addison is fine with my going on the mission?" Jacko asked.
Roman nodded and walked over to get them a couple cups of coffee.
"Said that he couldn't think of anyone better," Roman said softly. "I mean you know the man I don't!" Roman said carefully.
"Well sure I do, but he's your father in law. "Jacko muttered. "I mean I know Ella ain't exactly that friendly with the man but then you know that don't you?" Jacko said quickly.
Roman placed a cup of coffee in front of the other man.
"Tell me about It." he said with just a touch of edge to the statement.
He took a long drink from his own cup.
Jacko laughed.
"I've said as much as I know." Jacko told him.
Roman laughed and pulled up the other chair. He spun it around and sat on it, folding his arms across the back.
"Actually Sgt I think you know more than that." Roman said in a cold tone of voice.
"Roman don't make me say anymore I've given you as many clues as I can here." Jacko said hastily.
"You're telling me that my father in law is involved in this whole mess. Did he get me recalled?" Roman asked.
"I really don't have that information. He got me here, that much I do know." Jacko looked unhappy at the cross-examination.
"Yes, whose side are you on?" Roman asked him eventually. He drained his cup and placed it on the desk.
"That's easy, Ella's!" he told him.
Roman laughed bitterly.
"I don't know her at all do I?" he said finally.
"Roman you know as much as you let yourself know." Jacko told him. "This darkness. It gets us and draws us in until we can't see any light. We are who we are trained to be. Soldiers. You are and always will be. Accept it." Jacko told him. "You can fight it and you'll lose Roman. You keep walking away from who you are and you'll lose. You'll lose Ella and now, something more important."
Roman looked at him for a very long moment.
Jacko pulled out an envelope and left it on the top.
"I'll see you on the range tomorrow LT. " Jacko told him and left him alone. After a long moment Roman took hold of the envelope and read the letter sent from Joe. He read the words before him feeling a dark curling rage inside him. She'd denied him knowledge that she was carrying his babies and nearly died during their birth. He stood and walked out of the room. Across the compound and finally back to the briefing room.
He walked straight up to the Colonel and pulling back his fist he punched the other man.
"Son!" the man exclaimed pulling himself off the floor and standing on unsteady legs.
"I am not your son but apparently I am your son in law." Roman said. He stepped back and folded his arms across his chest.
"Now perhaps you'd like to tell the real reason I've been dragged into this mess?" Roman told him.
"You know it." he was told.
"That's not good enough. Why didn't you tell me who you were for starters?" Roman said.
"My daughter didn't want to know me. How could I mention who I was?" he said quickly.
"Didn't?" Roman picked upon the past tense. "Does that mean you've seen her?" he asked.
He nodded slowly. He briefly wondered how much the other man knew and decided it would be pointless to hold anything back now. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a letter from Ella.
"She asked me to give this to you. Said to find a time when it wouldn't distract you. Well that isn't going to happen now is it?" The Colonel said.
Roman took the letter and walked out without a backward glance. It was only later that he would realise that he had punched out a Colonel.
He poured another coffee and sat at the desk to open the letter. Out tumbled a number of photos. He looked at them seeing his children for the first time.
"Dear Roman, I'm sorry that this letter is the way that I tell you about our children but I can't hold the information back any longer. I know you will be angry with me. Ok, very angry, well… er…. Furious. Yes I knew I was pregnant when you left, I didn't mean to give you such a hard time but well I was hormonal. I went into premature labour and the babies had to be delivered by C Section. You have a son I have named George Joseph and a daughter Sophie Nicole. As you can see from the Pics Sophie is a little unwell but we are pulling for her. So you see you have more reason to come home in one piece. First you need to seriously tell me off for keeping this secret and then I need help with Nappy duty! I love you Roman and I'm sorry. Please come home to us. Ella."
Sighing Roman lay on his bed and looked at the pictures.