"Castle, stop being cute and help me with this," Kate nearly whined.

"You think I'm cute."

"Yes, but that is neither here nor there. If you want dinner soon I need you to at least mash the potatoes."

"I like them lumpy."

"Castle."

He gave her a grin and stood up from the bar, walking over to help her as requested.

"I like watching you cook," he mentioned after a moment.

"You do? Why?"

"I don't know. You just do it so easily I guess. You don't even look at the spices you pull off the rack, you just smell them to see if they'll work. It amuses me."

"I like to make my own rules."

"I might put on some weight if you keep cooking every night."

"Just skip the dessert, then you don't have to worry."

"I don't know if I can commit to that. Especially with these new fall recipes. I want to see how many more things you can do with a pumpkin."

Kate smiled and checked the time, asking him to scoot over so she could pull the pork chops from the oven.

"You spoil me," Castle remarked, leaning over to smell their dinner.

"I hope so."

"Is this the grownup version of Peter Brady's pork chops and applesauce?"

"Sure is."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure can."

He finished mashing the potatoes and transferred them into a bowl, then leaned against the counter.

"Where did you learn to cook?"

"My mom, mostly. Food Network when I can't sleep. And maybe a little of it is just natural born culinary prowess."

"You've cooked for other people before?"

"Just my dad, really."

"Did you cook for Josh? Demming?"

She smirked and shook her head.

"No, never did. Just you, Castle."

In a matter of seconds his arms were around her waist and his lips were crushed to hers. She dropped the fork she'd been holding and it clattered to the floor as she returned his affection, taken aback by his swiftness but smiling anyway.

"Kate?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Promise me you will never cook for anyone else. Unless they are incapacitated and you have to."

"Scout's Honor."

His stomach gave a particularly loud rumble and she laughed, moving away from him to pull the plates down from the cupboard.

"We'd better feed you before that thing exacts its' revenge."

"Yes please."

They plated up their food and sat down at the bar, bickering over the biggest dinner roll before settling down to eat.

"This is nice."

"What is?"

"Just this. The quiet."

"I didn't know you could sit still this long."

"Very funny. Though I admit, it is taking a lot of restraint."

"I appreciate it."

There was a loud knock on the door and they both jumped.

"Well, there goes that."

"Can we ignore it?"

"I wish we could but I am a curious man."

He stood up and walked towards the door, pulling it open to find Alexis' boyfriend.

"Max?"

"Hi, Mr. Castle. I was just… I wanted to talk… can I come in?"

Castle nodded confusedly and Max stepped inside, shoulders slumped.

"Max, is everything okay?" Kate asked, standing up from the bar and crossing the room to him.

"No, it's not. I'm worried about Alexis."

Castle motioned to the couch and the three of them sat down, Max on the far end, cracking his knuckles nervously.

"What exactly are you worried about?"

Max looked up and sighed, shaking his head slightly.

"I don't know for sure. She just seems to be getting worse."

"Worse?" Castle questioned, brow furrowed in concern. "Worse than what?"

Kate closed her eyes tightly for a moment as realization set it. Alexis had lied. She wasn't telling her father what had been going on, or even cluing him in to the fact that things weren't all right. This was not going to go well.

"That first panic attack she had, I thought that was bad enough but every one she has, it takes her longer to get back to herself afterwards. Haven't you noticed that, Detective Beckett?"

Kate floundered for a moment, feeling Castle's eyes boring into her.

"Yes, I have."

"I don't know what else to do to help her. You seem to help her through the panic attacks when they happen but afterwards I don't know what else to do for her. I've tried taking her out somewhere to get her mind off of it. I've tried just being quiet and letting her talk if she wants to. I've tried just leaving her alone. Nothing works. Nothing helps."

Castle sat in silent shock. Alexis seemed to be fine every time he talked to her. Kate hadn't said a word either. He felt like he'd been broadsided by a bus.

"Max, just trying to help her is the best thing you can do right now. It may not always work and it's never going to fix anything but she knows you care about her and you're trying to help. That means a lot."

"I'm just worried that something's going to happen to her. You know better than I do. Is she really okay?"

"She's getting there. Max, you have to remember that there are going to be days or even weeks when she seems and feels fine and then all of the sudden she's not. Eventually the bad days are going to space out enough that it's barely a part of her life anymore. But it's going to take time."

"I want to help her more than just being there. I feel like I'm not doing anything."

"But you are. Be patient with her and be there for her. That's what she needs the most, I promise."

"If you think of anything else will you let me know?"

"Of course."

He hesitated for a moment then stood up.

"I'm sorry I just dropped by like this. I should have called."

"No, that's okay," Castle said finally, standing up to walk him to the door. "You're welcome over here any time. Especially if you love my daughter enough to show up like this."

"Yes sir."

"Try ice-cream. It's a good temporary fix and you can enjoy it too."

"Thank you sir."

"You're welcome."

They said goodbye and Kate watched curiously from the couch. To be honest, deep down, she'd been curious to see Castle's shot gun stare, but it didn't seem like he wanted to use it. And with good reason. Over the last few weeks, she'd heard from Alexis just what kind of guy Max was and had come to the conclusion that the young man was not only head over heels in love, but actually held a deep seated concern and care for Alexis, one that rivaled anything Ashley or Owen had ever shown her. It was clear that Castle saw that as well.

Right now, however, his daughters college romance seemed to be the furthest things from his mind as he shut the door and stared Kate down.

"What's going on?" he asked, striding towards the couch.

"I said I wouldn't tell you. She promised me that she would."

"Well it's kind of out of the bag now, don't you think?"

"Rick-"

"Something is going on with my daughter and you haven't told me about it!"

"She didn't want me to! She told me that she would do it and I believed her, okay?"

"Well you lied to me in the process. And now I don't even know if my kid is alright."

"She's fine, Castle, it's just-"

"She's fine? She's fine?! I don't think she's fine if her boyfriend is coming over here worried about her. I don't think she's fine if she wouldn't even tell me about it. Are you a counselor, Kate? Are you her parent? Do you even have any idea how to love her or is she just an easy way for you to get to me?"

"I know you don't mean that."

"I am her father Kate, and I should be told what's going on in her life."

"She's an adult-"

"Don't give me that! If there is something going on with her, you should tell me no matter what."

"No. I'm not going to betray her trust like that, especially when she promised me she was telling you about it. And don't you dare tell me I don't love her. You know that I do."

"You can stand there and make excuses all you want but right now I need to go take care of my daughter."

He grabbed his coat and left, slamming the door behind him while she sunk onto the couch, heart racing and hands shaking. She didn't even know what to think at that point, whether she should warn Alexis that Castle was headed her way or if she should follow him. It was probably best that she did neither. Alexis had lied and she needed to see the consequence of that, and to follow him over to her dorm would just create way more drama than any of them could handle now.

Clearing her head as best she could, she went into the kitchen and put their interrupted dinner away, hoping that they could reheat it tomorrow night. Castle may have just majorly flipped out, and he may have said horrible things, but she was inclined to attribute it all to the fact that he was worried about Alexis and couldn't think very clearly when he was in that state of mind. It didn't make the words hurt less, but it made the sting a little less permanent.

Making sure the kitchen was clean she grabbed her coat and left the apartment, headed for home.

"Yo Beckett, we got a hit on the vic's cell phone," Esposito announced, dropping a folder on her desk. "Pinged up in Tarrytown, then went off the grid again."

"What's in Tarrytown?" she sighed, pulling the case file closer and looking over it.

"Vic's boss. When we got the signal from her phone, we ran all suspects numbers through to see who might be close to her phone. Mr. Harold Anthony pinged on all the same towers."

"Pick him up. If he hasn't seen her in a week, I want to know when she made him legal guardian of her phone."

"On it. Castle ever going to show up today?"

"I highly doubt it."

"Which one of you screwed up?"

"Espo, get out of here," she said, swatting him away. He gave her shoulder a squeeze and she patted his hand, then stood up. She needed to take a walk before sitting down and spending the next hour getting more familiar with Harold Anthony's initial interview. It had been two days since they'd talked to him and her mind had been occupied with other things since then.

Castle had never called her last night and neither had Alexis, leading her to hope and believe that they'd spent some time together sorting things out. Alexis needed to be reminded what a great resource her father was when it came to stuff like this, and she needed to get comfortable actually relying on him.

Kate thought back to three weeks ago when Alexis had uttered all those things in the heat of an emotional breakdown and wondered again what they had all meant. Some of them she'd riddled out and a few Alexis had explained, but there were a few big ones that she wasn't sure what to make of.

Downing a glass of tepid water, she went back to her desk and pulled open the manila folder, scanning over the background information on Harold Anthony. No prior arrests, nothing on his record as far as business troubles, all his finances lined up. On first glance there was nothing that would jump out as a motive for this man killing his employee. He wasn't even married so the idea of an affair cover-up fell to the bottom of the list. All they had to go on was his proximity to her cell phone two days after her death. Kate couldn't help but think this was a dead end.

She read through his original interview, absentmindedly reaching for the cup of coffee that usually sat on her desk and sighing when she remembered why it wasn't there. This was going to be a long day.

"Beckett."

She looked up to see Castle standing there, looking apologetic and tired, his hair mussed and his tie loose and crooked.

"Castle."

They regarded each other for a moment before she looked down at the file again, not sure what to say to him. He carefully moved into his chair, resting his hand on the side of her desk until she looked over.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Overreacting. Saying the things I said."

She nodded, closing the case file and sitting back in her chair, arms crossed gently over her stomach.

"Then why did you say them?"

"Because I was overreacting."

"So they just came out of nowhere."

"Kate."

"Rick?"

He sighed and tapped his fingers across the desk for a moment, his eyes turning dark and intense.

"The most important thing in the world to me is Alexis' happiness and safety. I could go without everything else as long as those two were assured. When I hear that she may not be okay, it's not a time for me to think rationally. All I want to do is protect her. All I can think about is getting to her and fixing everything. It doesn't matter if she's been kidnapped or if she slammed her thumb in a car door. All danger is the same. I have to get to her and fix things and by not telling me, you were standing in the way of that."

"Do you understand why I didn't tell you?"

"To some degree."

She nodded and put down the pen she'd been nervously spinning through her fingers.

"I get that you didn't want to betray her trust and I know she told you that she was telling me about it. But you never even brought it up to feel out the situation?"

"I was afraid that if we started talking about it I would tell you everything."

"In light of what could be going on with her, don't you think that was a risk you might want to take?"

"I didn't think about that. Castle, I'm doing the best that I can. I can't force her to talk to you, all I can do is tell her that she should."

"I know that."

"I have to try and decide what's the best thing to do for everyone."

"I get that now. Alexis and I talked about it, and she never meant to put you in the middle like that."

"I know she didn't."

"Kate, I'm sorry. You know that under normal circumstances I never would have yelled at you like that."

"I know you're sorry. But it doesn't change what you said. That had to come from somewhere Castle."

He was quiet and her stomach churned. She didn't want to have this conversation right now, or ever, but she knew they needed to.

"I know you love her, Kate. I know."

"But you don't think it's enough, do you?"

He sighed and rested his arms on his knees.

"Let's not talk about this here."

"I can't leave, Castle. I'm waiting for Espo to bring in a suspect."

"Come over tonight. Kate, we need to talk about this."

She wanted so badly to tell him no but she knew that would be far more damaging than he deserved.

"I'll call you when I'm done here."

"Thank you."

He reached over to squeeze her hand, then stood up from the chair and headed for the door.

"Castle?"

"Yeah?"

"It's gonna be okay."

"She said that?"

Kate nodded and looked down into her coffee mug quietly.

"Well, I'm not surprised."

"What?"

"Kate, what she said about me not being there for her, that's true. The fact of the matter is that if Meredith had been a better mother, she could have helped to make sure Alexis was okay. She was too busy creating her new life to bother. Alexis realizes that you won't give up on her. If you had been her mother, she wouldn't have had to go through that alone. And that's why now she's clinging to you instead of me because at one point I abandoned her. You never did."

"Castle, I don't think she sees it like that."

"Not anymore. But that doesn't mean she never wishes it was different."

"You know I love her."

"I know."

"I would do anything for her and I would never, ever use her to get to you."

"I know. But that's what I'm afraid of."

"I'm not Gina. I'm not Meredith."

"I know."

"I don't think you're afraid that I don't love Alexis. I think you're afraid that I don't love you."

The look on his face gave everything away and she reached over for his hand.

"I don't blame you for thinking that."

"You should."

"I don't. Castle, when the chips are down sometimes I don't let myself believe in you either. It's a curse."

He gave her a wry smile and she leaned closer, cupping his face in her hand.

"But just because we both have the human inclination to doubt others and think horrible things of ourselves, does not mean it's true and it does not mean that we love each other any less."

"I'm glad you seem to have your head on straight."

"It's one of my finer, yet more elusive qualities."

He gave a wry smile and dropped into serious mode, reaching up to brush her hand through his hair.

"So. What are we going to do about Alexis?"

"I don't know."

"Can you tell me what you two talked about or…?"

He nodded and sat back on the couch, wrapping his arms around her until she rested against his chest quietly.

"She said that seeing a counselor twice a month isn't enough, so she's going to go more often. I don't know if it's enough but neither one of us could come up with more of a solution than that."

"Is she going to start talking to you about things?"

"She says she is. She's worried that you're mad at her for lying."

"Me, the queen of subterfuge, mad at her for lying? No. A little disappointed but not mad."

"Could you call her?"

"I will. Are you okay?"

He shook his head and dropped a kiss to the top of her head.

"I really thought she was alright. Seemed like she was. No red flags, my Spidey-sense didn't tingle or anything."

"Castle, more than anything in the world, Alexis wants to protect you. She doesn't want to worry you and she's afraid that if you see her having a hard time you're going to ensconce her in bubble wrap and never let her leave the house."

"That's a good idea."

"I didn't mean it as a suggestion."

"Am I doing this right? This parenting from afar thing?"

"Probably not but I don't think there's actually a right way so maybe you're doing fine after all."

"Don't tease me."

"She's going to be fine, Castle."

"You're the only one saying that."

"I was fine wasn't I?"

"Yeah."

"She's going to get through this. We're going to help her and eventually she's going to do it all on her own. We'll get her there and she's going to come out stronger on the other side."

"I just wish she didn't have to go through any of this."

"I know."

"I need a timeframe."

"I can't give you one."

"Worth a shot."

They sat in silence for a little while before she sat up, her face turned completely serious.

"Are we okay, Castle?"

"Yeah, we're fine."

"Good. Want to eat that dessert from last night?"

"Bless you, good woman."

He gave her hand a squeeze before she stood up from the couch, wondering how much more of this he could take.